This is the only god I would worship, anyway

Since everyone is having fun with the good/evil quiz, let’s up the ante: what kind of god or goddess are you? The questions are very dada-esque, which is appropriate, since godhood doesn’t make any sense anyway.

Which God or Goddess are you like?

Your Result: You are your own God or Goddess

Sorry to say, i have no answer that fits you. You are your very own person, and you like to do things your own way. You have stumped me this time, but i will soon make a quiz that will have your answer, just you wait…

The Christian God
Goddess Bast
Goddess Sekhemet
God Zeus
Which God or Goddess are you like?
Make Your Own Quiz

I’m rather disappointed that my Zeus score is so low. I could throw lightning bolts and impregnate lovely mortal women! Give me a chance!

(via Salad is Slaughter)


  1. Azkyroth says

    Which God or Goddess are you like?

    Your Result: Goddess Sekhemet

    You are Sekhemet. You are loving and caring, but when need be, you are fierce and protective. You love the color red and you are no vegetarian. Your feirce nature makes you somewhat like a rebel, but you like it that way. Congratulations!! You are Goddess!!

    You are your own God or Goddess
    God Zeus
    Goddess Bast
    The Christian God
    Which God or Goddess are you like?
    Make Your Own Quiz

    Except that I prefer black to red, am a vegetarian, and *sigh*

  2. kellbelle1020 says

    Odd that “The Christian God” and “Jesus” are separate entries. Aren’t Christians monotheistic? Unless they’re going for the trinity thing, but then where’s the Holy Spirit? I bet he/she/it feels pretty left out. It’s like the red-headed stepchild of the trinity.

    Anyway, I was also my own goddess. Goddess Bast was my #2 though; I had to look her up – she’s the Egyptian cat goddess. Satan was my #3! Pretty awesome top three, in my opinion.

  3. Cat of Many Faces says

    Aww, I got the christian god. I suppose I should expect online quizzes to insult me :P

  4. CalGeorge says

    This partially makes up for the barely evil result I got earlier. Satan tops the list and the Chrisian god is in last place. All’s right with the world.

    Your Result: You are your own God or Goddess

    Goddess Sekhemet
    Goddess Bast
    God Zeus
    The Christian God

  5. Tiax says

    Grab a digit on your hand. Wich one did you grab?

    This should’ve had an answer, “I can’t, my hands are nailed to a piece of wood.”

  6. Christian Burnham says

    I am Christ, but given my name, what other God could I have been?

  7. j says

    “This is the only god I would worship, anyway”

    That’s awfully Randian of you, PZ.

  8. b_sharp says

    Well, if you have to be a God, you might as well be the one who has the most fun.

    Goddess Sekhemet
    God Zeus

    I have no idea how these got here.

    Goddess Bast
    The Christian God

  9. Pygmy Loris says

    I got Budha, followed by Zeus and the Christian God, which makes me wonder about the gender question. I checked female, but my top three are males? Oh well, this contrasts nicely with my Evil rating earlier.

  10. says

    I got my own god, too, but for some reason scored very high for Sekhmet and Satan. That was a really annoying quiz, though. I also scored totally evil. I’m feeling good about my day so far.

  11. abeja says

    I can’t believe this–It said I’m Jesus, and chicks chase after me. So apparently I’m lesbian Jesus…

  12. mojojojo says

    Buddha, followed by Jesus (the enlightened one, I assume, not the mean-spirited one modern x-ians like to hide behind when they are feeling cowardly)

  13. mojojojo says

    Abeja, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.” Galations 3:28

    Huhm? Doesn’t gibe with many other refs to gender in bible, but then… it is the bible after all…

  14. Skeptic says

    I’m Jesus! Yay, millions of devout (and mindless) minions and disciples.

    Second best was myself as my own god, though. Then Buddha, then the Christian God, then Zeus, Satan, Sekhemet and finally Bast.

  15. Jeff says

    These things always turn me into a woman. :-/

    Your Result: Goddess Bast

    You are the Goddess Bast. You are quiet and calm, but when need be, you are firm and fierce. You are full of love, and you always care. People often come to you for advise or guidance, and you willingly give it. Congatulations!! You are Goddess!!

  16. Steve_C (Secular Elitist) FCD says

    Yeah I was Jesus with Buddha a very close second.

    That works for me.

  17. says

    Apparently I found the “none of the above” triggers.

    I got “you are your own god” as well, which is nice I guess. I am slightly more like Satan, and slightly less like Jesus than any other deity, but all the others came out a nice middle-of-the-road 50%. Which you’d think itself would give bonus points to my Buddha score but maybe I’m overthinking this.

  18. says

    I am also my own god, but the rest of the list is pretty good. I like the bottom.

    Goddess Sekhemet


    God Zeus

    Goddess Bast

    Budha [sic]


    The Christian God

  19. Anne says

    You are Zeus.

    You are fierce and stong, and you like to throw lightning bolts at people who deserve it. You are fearless when it comes to fear, and harmless to nothing. You have the guts to take on anything and never look back. Congratulations!! You are God!!


    PHEER ME!!! (for I am stong)

    That’s more like it, yeah…

  20. Paguroidea says

    It said I was Buddha.

    “You are a very peaceful person. You love all who love you. You are a cheerful personality and you have a great sense of humor.”

    I’m glad I’m Buddha instead of the Christian god.

  21. says

    I’m my own mythology as well. Yeah!

    I got quite high scores for both satan and sekhemet (which I assume is a mis-spelling of sekhmet?), with both jesus and the christian god scoring very low, at the bottom of the pantheon.

  22. says

    You can get your actual percentages from the HTML:

    Me 87%
    Budha 48%
    Goddess Sekhemet 46%
    Goddess Bast 44%
    Satan 44%
    Jesus 44%
    God Zeus 33%
    The Christian God 33%

    I rock! Furthermore, none of the other gods are above 50%, and Bast, Satan, and Jesus are in a tie for third, with Zeus and the Christian God both bringing up the rear.

    Top that, ya’ll secular humanist wannabes!

  23. tom c says

    I came out as a tie between Jesus and Satan for first place. I don’t even want think about what that implies about me.

  24. George Cauldron says

    It’s a rather cheesy quiz if they can’t even spell ‘Buddha’ right.

  25. John Vreeland says

    The Christian God (and)

    I thought those were the same? I don’t think the Holy Spirit even made the list. Anyway, I suspect that the answer is pure playful bunk, and the result is some kind of meaningless hash of your responses. Interestingly, I tried the quiz again while trying to fake my answers and it said “Whatever you say, Yahweh.”

  26. Kimpatsu says

    Your Result: Satan

    Which is odd, because on the Good/Evil quiz I was angelic…

  27. RavenT says

    Well, isn’t that how Satan got his start after all (“The Fallen Angel Formerly Known As Lucifer”)?

  28. speedwell says

    What? I am a Randian, sort of, and I got Buddha. Go figure. If I had my choice, though, of all the goddesses whether in or not in the quiz, I suppose I would have picked Parvati.

    Don’t ask.

  29. Ken Mareld says

    Wow, not only am I pure evil, I’m also Jesus.
    Not only have you been warned, but I love you.

    That’s just creepy. Next quiz will say I’m a Nixonian Republican. While he may have been our last liberal president (relative to what came after) I think I need to just shoot myself.

    Ken again

  30. Crudely Wrott says

    Man, this is wacky; I love it!

    Without giving away my answers and by estimating the percentage of red displayed in the “scoring fields” I ended up like this:

    Over All: 80% my own god or goddess
    Satan: 70%
    Zeus 70%
    Goddess Sekhemet 65%
    Xtian God 50%
    Budha 40%
    Jesus 35%
    Goddess Bast 35%

    Listen PZ, I’m really sorry about the Zeus score. I wasn’t even trying, I swear!

    What confuses me is who is Bast and why is she last?

  31. twincats says

    Both those quizzes are BOGUS BOGUS BOGUS!!!

    I am SO not God or Angelic. I am, however, insulted. :(

  32. dorid says

    hmmm… I’m getting more and more disturbed by these quiz results…

    Your Result: The Christian God

    You are the Holy Lord. You are the shepherd and those that follow you are your lambs. You are kind and patient, but when need be, you are vile and creul. You are often asked for advise or wisdom, and you willingly give it. Congratulations!! You are God!!

    {wow, the guy who did this quiz couldn’t even spell CRUEL… I guess I shouldn’t worry TOO much about the validity of this one ;) }

  33. says

    I’m rather disappointed that my Zeus score is so low. I could throw lightning bolts and impregnate lovely mortal women! Give me a chance!

    Uh… Didn’t you just recently mention having done at least one of those things three times?

  34. says

    Yeah, see? I’m qualified!

    I’m a little deficient on the lightning-bolt-throwing, but once my godhood comes through, ZAP!

  35. Caledonian says

    I don’t see Cthulhu on that list.

    You’d better do some worshipping, fast, or you’ll be eaten last.

  36. says


    Christian God, me.

    How odd. So was I. We could flip a coin, see who gets to be the holy spirit?
    A few more folks score that, we can also claim infinite regression. ;)

  37. Scott Hatfield says

    I am the “Budha”? This Christian is amused! Though, on the other hand, I am quite bald….and…..fat…..!

    Get thee behind me, Satan Quiz!

  38. Dianne says

    I’m ok with being Sehkmet followed by my own god/dess, but I’m really pleased at getting the Christian god last.

  39. MJ Memphis says

    “I am the “Budha”? This Christian is amused! Though, on the other hand, I am quite bald….and…..fat…..!”

    If it helps, the fat bald Buddha is strictly a Chinese modification. In the canonical descriptions, Buddha was actually tall, svelte, and had quite a lot of hair. He did, however, specifically deny being any sort of god.

  40. Mari says

    Got to be my own god too, contrary bugger that I am.

    The rest were in this order: Sekhemet, Bast, Budha, Zeus, The Christian God, Jesus, Satan

    Hmm, Christianity occupying the three bottom spots -not much of a surprise there..

  41. Lynn says

    LOL! I’m so proud! Not only am I my own goddess, but those three Christian pretenders, Jesus, The Christian God and Satan, scored bottom three in my similarity lexicon ;^)


  42. says

    Ha! I’m my own goddess too! Yay! (And 93% too… wow. Probably because I deigned to be contrary with their “Pick one (1) uno” garbage.)

    As for the rest:
    Jeebus 68%
    Buddha 59%
    Sekhmet 57%
    Bast, Satan and Christian God all 54%
    Zeus 41%

    Hey, CG oughta be Yahweh, ’cause then the term applies to the Judeo- part of Judeo-Christian thinking.

    And no Allah. So disappointing.

    (Just noticed, too, that most of the ‘mainstream’ ‘gods’ are perceived as male… there’s a blog post in that somewhere.)

  43. says

    Crudely Wrott: Bast is the Egyptian cat goddess.

    I’m the Christian god, apparently. And evil. Hmm. These are just wacky people making up these quizzes …