German Car Sales Are Destroying America!

From Paste

Trump’s ever-expanding axis of evil (i.e. anybody he doesn’t find “tremendous”) grew just a little bit more yesterday. Along with Muslims and exercise, Trump has now decided that Germans are “very bad.” Trump, eloquent as ever, has taken offense to Germany’s trade surplus with the United States. According to German news outlet Der Spiegel (presumably German for “fake news”), Trump made his remarks while voicing his frustration during a meeting with top EU leaders.

Elon James White *blink*

Animated gif of Elon James White blinking in confusion…

Trump has gone on record to say that he wants to heavily tax German cars telling German newspaper Bild: “If you want to build cars in the world, then I wish you all the best. You can build cars for the United States, but for every car that comes to the USA, you will pay 35 percent tax.”

If that doesn’t work, Trump has reportedly vowed to block the sales of all German cars in America. As long as Trump is president, you can be sure he will do everything in his power to stop at least one foreign thing from entering the country: whether it be illegal Mexican immigrants, muslim refugees or even just some German automobiles. If none of those bans come through, Trump may be forced to resort to forbidding foreign Chinese takeout from entering the White House as a means of salvaging some victory from his presidency.

Yeah so basically… dude is itching for some kind of… something… or… I don’t…

You know what?

I give up.

I have absolutely no clue what the hell is going on anymore. I don’t understand any of it, nor do I know how to handle it. This is all infuriatingly confusing.


What is going on?


  1. Pierce R. Butler says

    I can’t help but wonder, in all his years as an ultra-conspicuous consumer, how many Mercedes-Benzes & BMWs Trump has owned.

  2. blf says

    As pointed out in Trump’s big trip began well — but in Europe his flaws were painfully exposed:

    Trump’s denunciation of the Germans at a European Union meeting for being “bad, very bad,” because of the large number of German brand cars sold in the US, showed his comprehension of the global auto trade was just as shaky [as his grasp of how Nato operates]. The vast majority of German cars sold in the US are made there by American workers. For example, the BMW plant in South Carolina is the company’s largest anywhere in the world. It is also the biggest exporter of cars from the US.

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