So this dude, Brian Robinson, is described by the NY Post as a “railway Romeo” because Robinson claims “he has gone on 500 dates with women he has met on the subway”.

I don’t even know 500 people, but then I exist on Twitter and consider journeys beyond my study more daunting than Frodo’s journey to Mount Doom. I’ve always had an issue in general with men’s approach to “picking up” women (ugh, that phrase); it seems to ratchet up the creep levels when there’s formulas involved as with all pick up artists (PUA) formulas.

So what’s wrong with Robinson? Well he says:

If you see some pretty young thing, say something

Or, you know. Don’t. How about just letting women go about their business? How about recognising people are just trying to move from A to B? Women consistently are saying how much they do just want to be left alone, that their existence in a public space is not licence to speak to them for the purpose of acquiring their contact details.

I must point out that the Post itself calls him “a subterranean ­seducer” – not me, the Post. They’re unthinking description is kind of apt.

“My late Uncle Minor was a big womanizer — maybe that was part of my gift,”

“Womanizer”… “gift”. You do realise your “powers” seem to only function underground, interrupting women who are in the middle of moving from one location to another, right? Seems more opportunistic than it does “impressive”. Also, you know, creepy.

“[Uncle Minor] got kicked out of nursing homes for pinching the nurses’ bottoms.”

Well, that’s a mentor you want. Again “womaniser” is a euphemism for inappropriate jackass who treats women like meat.

Robinson’s time-tested approach is to pretend he’s lost and ask for directions.

Deception, yay! Again, your “gift” isn’t to charm women, it’s to lie to them about your current status, at a time that makes all people vulnerable to public engagement.

The trick, he says, is to have a quick conversation where you express interest in who she is and what she does — not trying to overtly hit on her. Then use the deadlines of the subway as an advantage: “I have to get off at the next stop and would love to continue this conversation. Can I get your e-mail address?”

“Trick”? I thought it was a “gift”?

The Post observed Robinson in action last week, and he was as smooth as advertised — getting digits or e-mails from four out of the five stunning straphangers he chatted up.

Science! Did you verify it was their real address and numbers?

“He was very engaging,” she said, rating Robinson’s technique a 7 out of 10. “He was persistent.”

Only a 7? That’s not particularly impressive. Yeah, persistence… That’s not a property of creepiness.

“One time a woman reached into her purse and it looked like she had a little bottle of Mace,” Robinson recalled. “She said, ‘I don’t have time for this.’ She pulled it out — and then I got up and left.”

GEE! I WONDER WHY.

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The Post summarises his “tips for meeting women on the subway”

• Don’t ever try during rush hour

Yeah! You don’t want to inconvenience them or anything.

• Always carry a loaded MetroCard; pay for her ride if she’s fumbling at the turnstile.

That’s kind of sweet, though kind of awkward if she didn’t want you to.

• Always war [sic] a suit and carry a briefcase — it communicates strength and security, even if you live with your mom.

Ah, more deception. We all know suits indicates non-sleaze and non-creep, right?

• Ask where she’s from; if she’s from NYC or somewhere local, just say, “I thought you were French.”

Have you heard a French accent before? Not all foreigners (#NotAllForeigners) are French.

• Limit the chitchat — once she’s engaged and you’ve developed some dialogue (1 to 2 minutes), say, “I’d love to visit with you longer…but my stop is approaching…do you have e-mail?” Once you get the number or e-mail, get off, even if it’s not your stop. Leave her wanting more.

This is the only good one because it means less time having to deal with creeps.

• Wait 60 hours before contacting her. Most men text/e-mail immediately. Throw her off, make her wait.

I’m sure she’s pining for you, dude.