The Evangelical Spectrum

“Evangelicals cover a spectrum,” he said,
“We’re a red state, yes, but not equally red—
We might seem the same to some blue-blooded fool,
But we’re not all maroons, as a cardinal rule.”
So I looked a bit closer, as you will, I trust,
And saw coral and crimson and ruby and rust,
Amaranth, auburn, and burgundy wine,
From scarlet to rufous, and on down the line—
So, yes, there’s a spectrum that’s there to be seen,
But it lacks blue and yellow, and has no trace of green
Not monochromatic (it’s close, but not quite)
So why are they treated like plain black or white?


More, after the jump: [Read more…]

Santorum Is The Real Victim Here

It is so very sad, what the gays have done
To a wonderful person like Rick
They label him hateful, but he loves every one
Though the things that they do make him sick

Santorum believes that gay marriage is wrong
And the gays call that view an attack!
But “separate but equal” keeps straight marriage strong—
It’s ok to seat gays in the back

The horrible things that these activist gays
Do to Rick, are too awful to mention
When really, he loves them—he just hates their ways—
Homophobia’s not his intention!

Gays shouldn’t get married. That’s Rick’s point of view.
It’s not that he wants to restrict ‘em
But it’s there in his bible, which is your bible too…
Santorum is really the victim!

Weapons-grade projection, after the jump: [Read more…]

Today Is Religious Freedom Day

…and for those of you named Peter Palumbo, this post is an illustration of why Freedom of Religion must also necessarily be Freedom from Religion.

The cross on the hill was a beautiful sight
On the days when the sky was most bluish;
It stood for the soldiers who gave up their lives
Well, except when the soldiers were Jewish.

The cross on the hill, it looked rugged and old
Though the city maintained it as newish;
The congressman said that it stood for the dead
Well, unless they were atheist, Muslim, or Jewish.

The cross on the hill was a secular thing—
That’s a lie, but it kinda sounds truish—
The judge said it symbolized service and loss
Well, except for the Buddhists, the Hindus, the Pagans, the Jains, the Confucians, the Shinto, the Sikh, the Druids, the Wiccans, Baha’i, Hare Krishna, Zoroastrian, Scientologists, atheists, Muslim or Jewish. Or the religions of the tribal nations who once owned the land the cross is on.

The cross on the hill is religious, of course
Said a Judge who rejected the woo-ish
And it can’t be a symbol for everyone there
If it doesn’t mean Buddhists, the Hindus, the Pagans, the Jains, the Confucians, the Shinto, the Sikh, the Druids, the Wiccans, Baha’i, Hare Krishna, Zoroastrian, Scientologists, atheists, Muslim or Jewish. Or, you know, the indans. Or even Christians who don’t want a symbol, or use a different cross from the Latin Cross, or (fades)


Image by Will Fresch–wikipedia commons

Peter, Peter…

Peter is a congressman; Peter swore an oath.
He loves both God and Country—but he cannot stand for both.
When Christians in his district want to break the nation’s rules,
Giving Christian prayer a special place, inside the public schools—
When Christians in his district want to violate the law,
And wrote those wishes publicly, which Peter clearly saw,
When Christians in his district threatened Jessica with harm
Did Peter see their lunacy as cause to take alarm?
No, Peter had the chance to disagree with what they said
But sided with the Christian mob that’s howling for her head
When Peter had to choose between his country and his king,
Chose Jesus, and called Jessica “an evil little thing.”

Peter…

You love both God and Country, but you’ve clearly made your choice
You could have done the proper thing—you could have raised your voice
You might have stood with Jessica—she’s right, you surely know—
You can’t serve both; you made your choice; it’s time now, sir, to go.

JT has the story. As does PZ. As does Ophelia.

Attack Of The Undead Scarecrows II

Atheists! Look in your purse or your pocket;
There’s God on the money you carry around!
The motto is yours, though you atheists mock it,
And God’s how we know that our money is sound!

Your using this money is clearly hypocrisy
Atheists ought to refuse it—the fools!
Sucks to be you, though; our Christian democracy
Trusts in our God—and majority rules!

The courts say it’s legal, so quit your complaining—
No reason to get all your bills in a wad!
We Christians find atheists so entertaining—
Each time you use money, you’re praising our God!

Rant, after the jump: [Read more…]

As Predicted (The Cranston Ruling)

As I wrote at the time of the court case…

This isn’t religious, it’s merely tradition
I’m certain our case will be met with approval
A secular prayer—just a trivial thing—
So we’ll fight tooth and nail to prevent its removal

The prayer was a gift from a class in the sixties
Its place in tradition just can’t be denied
This isn’t religious! It’s all about freedom!
And we’ll fight, with our secular god on our side

For decades, the mural’s been there in the hallway
And no one—not one—had complained it’s religious
The taunting and threats that this Jessica’s getting?
It’s her fault alone, cos she’s so damned litigious

She’s out for attention! That’s all that this is!
The god-hating liberal, atheist slut!
We good Christian people should teach her a lesson
How sometimes it’s safer to keep your mouth shut.

How dare she insult us? How dare she mock God?
How dare she belittle the prayer in the hall?
How dare she believe that the law’s on her side—
Remember… this isn’t religious at all!

All the good stuff after the jump:
[Read more…]

A Win For The Bravest Girl In Rhode Island

There was never a question
No slightest suggestion
That Jessica would not prevail
The Cranston West banner
In no form or manner
Was legal, or so goes the tale.
The Judge has decided;
The school has been chided—
The ruling: It must be removed!
It’s great! Well, it ain’t if
You’re not with the Plaintiff
But only the wrong disapproved!
As a matter of prudence
It’s worth telling students
That Jessica’s view is the law
And I’m sure that they’ll cope,
But in truth, it’s my hope
That they see what Jessica saw

Via Ophelia and PZ, Jessica Ahlquist has prevailed! No great surprise–we knew she was on the side of right. We knew there were idiots massing against her. But frankly, it’s easy being the people watching from the sidelines. As much as we knew the outcome, it can’t have been easy being Jessica.

I know there have been other contests, but Jessica Ahlquist gets my nod for person of the year. Not just atheist of the year, let alone female atheist of the year. Person of the year. I (vaguely–I’m old) remember being that age. Jessica is braver than I have ever been. My hat is off to her!

Yeah, But What About The Other Guys?

He helpfully points
To the cracks in the joints–
You will give them attention, he’s hopin’
That should cut down the breeze
Unless nobody sees
He’s conveniently propped the door open.
There’s a draft in the room
But he’d rather assume
That the open door isn’t the cause
Just attend to a crack,
Cos he’s coming right back
With an armfull of hole-cutting saws.
[Read more…]

The U.S. War On Religion

While nobody wants us to see a sharia,
Respecting some other religion is fine
With proud church-and-state separation, this nation
Can make one exception—allowing for mine.
My faith is a factor in hiring and firing,
In filling prescriptions, in working with gays;
I’ll claim I’m the victim of warring, ignoring
The laws that the rest of the country obeys

The language that’s used in campaigning, explaining
How Christians are victims of hatred outright,
Is carefully tuned to the masses of asses
Who eagerly listen, convinced that it’s right.
The pandering pinheads are trying, by lying,
To gather their forces, to strengthen their core;
The truth is too boring, but fighting’s exciting—
To rally the troops, they’ve invented a war.

after the jump: [Read more…]

Attack Of The Undead Scarecrows

If the scientific method uses senses, which are flawed,
Then the scientists who use it, when they poke their fun at God,
Have no guarantee of certainty, and so they might be wrong
Which is what religious faithful have been saying all along.
Religion studies subjects, though, which no one has observed,
There’s no observation bias, thus the truth is better served!
Since they can’t believe their measurements, the scientists are lost—
So the whole of modern science, why it might as well be tossed!
Yes, tomorrow they could tell us that they’ve found they got it wrong,
Cos the solar system’s center was our planet all along!

Since scientists are human, they have all the human flaws
So religion is a better way… because!

Context–both general and specific–after the jump: [Read more…]