GOP’s Toddler Tantrum Tactics

You won’t make a deal with me?
Two can play that game, you see—
So now I will not negotiate with you!
Since we’ve talked this thing to death
Now it’s time to hold my breath—
And we’ll know that you’re to blame when I turn blue

Hey, you guys, it isn’t fair
That you keep me from my air
And my pipeline, and my drilling, and my coal
And Obamacare’s repeal
And Paul Ryan’s budget deal
It’s a battle for the nation’s very soul

You keep telling me to note
That Obama won the vote
I don’t like it, but I’m very much aware
When the nation had their say,
Though, they didn’t vote my way,
So I’m telling you, quite clearly, I don’t care

So I’d better get my way
When you hold your vote today
And you’d better give me everything I want
Cos if not, you’d best believe
I’ll just take your ball and leave
And condemn you for your politicking stunt

We’ve moved from political negotiations to hostage negotiations in Washington.


  1. Psychopomp Gecko says

    They seemed ready to go along with it before. I’m guessing they took one look at the polls about Ted Cruz after his rant and decided to jump on the bandwagon.

  2. Pliny the in Between says

    Cuttlefish – thanks for the fodder!. It’s hard to believe they’d burn down the house to win, but here we are.

  3. StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return! says

    @1. AndrewD : Yeah, I think we’re all aware of that. I see this as an analogy not an insult – and a comparison that’s far harsher on the Republicans who do (or should) know better than the toddlers who don’t.

  4. StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return! says

    We’ll hold you all to hostage
    With talk though not with guns
    We’ll hold things up forever
    And cause, of troubles, tonnes

    We know we’ll get our way
    Because we know we’re right
    We know it too you’ve got no, stomach for the fight
    And if we’re wrong, well we don’t care
    Bout all the crap to come
    Cause we’re already powerful and rich and having fun

    This whole land is our plaything
    From sea to shining sea
    If anyone’s to break it
    Twill be me, me, ME!

    We don’t like your Obamacare, we hate to help the sick
    We don’t like the environment we’re going to kill it quick
    We won’t allow you anything, from companies you must buy
    And pay and pay forever until the day you die.

    We’ll hold this country hostage
    We’ll hold it till its through
    And when we leave it broken,
    well all be in the poo.

    The implications spread beyond
    This single mighty place
    The fight shall go on longer
    Than this bitter party race
    In future years we’ll suffer
    Even more than we do now
    From Teaparty’s cruel intolerance and how!

  5. Crudely Wrott says

    Early morning, October first-

    Well, they’ve gone and shut down the mill. Better hope you’ve enough flour to make bread for a time.

    I can hear the echo of my mother voice, “If you kids don’t stop squabbling I’ll crack your heads together!”

    We could use Ma right about now . . .

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