Friday Limericks: You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry

I’ve been making one hell of a list
Of the things that keep getting me pissed
I’ll remember them all
From the great to the small
And be mad if there’s any I’ve missed

Like, for instance, the country’s at war
And the president’s judgment is poor
There’s so much we could choose
To explore in the news,
But they lead with the Guv and the whore.

And I’m mad cos I watch my TV
When I know what it’s doing to me—
My blood pressure rises
As shows award prizes
For crap I would pay not to see.

And I’m angry at freakin’ Ben Stein
And that movie on Stupid Design
Cos if we’re created
It’s clear that God hated
Our asses—or maybe just mine.

So, hate is the topic today
Or dislike, or annoyance, dismay,
Hot and bothered vexation
Or mere irritation—
I’m sure you have something to say!

That’s right–the topic today is whatever annoys you. Irritates you. Bothers you. Steams your clams. Burns your beans. Gets your goat. Harshes your mellow. Pisses in your cornflakes. Frays your last nerve…

You get the point. Have at it!

(One thing that does not make me mad–I was very happy to see all the limericks last week! And I’d love to see more–I know I have lurkers here, not commenting; come on! Limericks are easy!)


  1. says

    Lately the bulbs have been growing And the buds on the roses are showingBut now it’s all coldThis is getting real oldAnd why is it still fucking snowing?AndI come in to work on my bikeAnd one thing I really don’t likeIs a big SUVWhose driver can’t seeGet out of your car; take a hike!Have you decided on a charity yet so I can donate your prize from my own limerick competition?

  2. says

    What annoys me are the framersWho think that science should be tamerThough they try to deny itThey want Myers to be quietIn short, they want scientists lamer!

  3. says

    I hate it whenever I findA blog post that echoes my mindThat calls out to meTo comment swiftlyBut my ideas just stall and rewindAnd I really just cannot abideTo see gamma rays blasted outsideTheir purpose, I thunkWas to unleash the hunkThat secretly all humans hide I hate it whenever you’ve cursedThat the comments must always be versedBut it’s not quite so bitterIf I stumble and twitterYet still end up here as the first…It’s now getting really absurdI’d just gone to preview my wordTo find out that two moreHave got in before To push this right back to third :)

  4. says

    It is spring, so now everything’s brown,mud and muck spread all over the ground.I do wish it would snow(just until the plants grow!)to cover up the goop that’s around.I can’t get mad at public TV,but they do owe me one DVD:I made my donation,but to my frustrationthe gift never arrived that was free!

  5. says

    Being a girl gamer geekDecent RP is all that I seekBut I’m feeling quite worn’cause I only find pornAnd keep getting hit on all week.And my sewing machine has quit workingDespite all my urging and jerkingI just need a thrustA nice corsetted bustThe technology gods must be smirking.

  6. says

    I cannot maintain my comportmentWhen trapped by slow-moving impedimentWhy buy a MaseratiIf you’ll only go 40Might as well drive John Deere equipment

  7. says

    The media make my blood boil,When news anchors start to despoilThe facts with their polls, analyzed by the trolls,And pundits who hawk their snake oil.Straight facts are not relevant these days.Just, “he says,” and “she says,” “and we says…”Are all that’s essential, plus dirt that’s tangential.Hyperbolic mendacity pays!Talking heads, tight-ass passion inflamersCall those lib’ruls rude names. And the framers…Of asshat IDers, and rich profiteers Rile the faithful. Great job, crass defamers!Republican truth and decorumIs modeled by folks like Santorum.They tell us they’re truthy, but exposed as uncouthyAin’t it great? Don’t you all just adore ‘em?So I’ll sit down to watch tonight’s news.It’s just more of right-wing batshit views.Exploitive distracters, misogynistic wise-crackers,Who lie, obfuscate and confuse!

  8. says

    I know I’ve got thoughts to explore,Yet my poems are always a snore.Still, I sit down to write,Give my pencil a bite–And see that it’s Friday no more.

  9. says

    The thing that will get me quite hotIs an issue that’s seemingly fraught:The tech can’t self startAnd the Board’s not so Smart:It’s IT support that is not.

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