A note to Al

Just a quick one. Because he says

I’ve been confirming that I left of my own accord all over the ether, including my farewell post on Ftb, and my Welcome post here, on Facebook, Twitter and Google+.

It was Ophelia who decided to let the cat out of the bag several days before I had planned, and posted a piece that insinuated the exact opposite. This left me with a shitload of work to do changing links, redesigning graphics, etc., on a night I planned to spend with my family.

The quick note is just to say that I didn’t know it was a secret. I didn’t know I was letting a cat out of a bag. Part of the reason for that is that the ragey podcast with Reap Paden was already out there. Given the nature of the podcast it didn’t even occur to me that Al was keeping his departure a secret. Maybe it should have, but it didn’t. I didn’t intend to leave Al with a shitload of work on a night he’d planned to spend with his family.

This made me quite angry, but not at FtB as a whole. I still maintain there are a lot of talented writers there, and regardless of anyone’s personal opinion about individual writers, it would be perfectly understandable if they stayed with their favorites.

I’ve commented on this blog, as well as other places, that the only two who’ve been given the boot from FtB have been Thunderf00t and Laden, and that JT, Dan, John, etc., left on their own accord, as well.

There are, however, individuals at FtB who are REALLY starting to piss me off – and the results will be predictable, and not pretty at all.

Got it. We can look forward to another ragey podcast, with extra added fucking bitches and stupid cunts. Noted.

Update: I forgot to say that it’s just not true that I “insinuated” that Al had been pushed out of FTB as opposed to deciding to leave. That’s a falsehood.


  1. bcmystery says

    From the ReapRagePodcast alone it’s clear Al was already REALLY pissed off, and now he’s trying to re-write history so he can play the victim AND pre-justify his indefensible behavior on future ReapRagePodcasts.

    Got it.

  2. Aratina Cage says

    Oh fuck this shit. Ophelia, he is trying to turn this into a conversation where it is all about you and he is hurt, innocent Al. And then he goes on to basically take bethhedrick’s “predictable” position of threatening you with a podcast full of violent misogynistic slurs aimed at you if you don’t shut up.

    I hope you know that his schtick is transparent to many of us and is nothing more than an attempt to deflect the unthinkable, indefensable stance he has taken on misogyny.

  3. says

    @ 1 – Well quite. The podcast seemed like a publicly torched bridge, and that’s why it didn’t cross my mind that his departure was a secret. (If the podcast seemed like a publicly torched bridge, why did I think we could still have a civil discussion yesterday? I’m not sure, now. Some kind of stupid optimism.)

  4. sawells says

    A big part of the problem seems to be this “I refuse to be told I have any privilege” schtick of Al’s. I think he thinks that male privilege only exists when people say “I am male and I demand my privileges”; he’s not interested in noticing the thousand tacit background privileges he’s been getting all along. Ergo bitches. Apparently.

  5. says

    Aratina – well I’m pretty sure the podcast full of violent misogynistic slurs aimed at me is not conditional. I’m pretty sure it’s on the calendar no matter what, so there would be no point in my shutting up even if I wanted to or intended to.

    I don’t, of course, want to or intend to.

  6. says

    I must have missed the insinuation. I sure had the impression that Al left by his own choice. I admittedly also had the impression that he would not be missed.

  7. Aratina Cage says


    well I’m pretty sure the podcast full of violent misogynistic slurs aimed at me is not conditional.

    That is another strange thing about all this. Beth and Al have both used it threateningly, but it already happened. It has been happening for over a year now, actually, but they still think it is something they can lord over you to make you shut up. They know free speech can do harm, they threaten you and other women with it, and yet they act like the abuse you and others have been getting is nothing! It boggles my mind.

    I don’t, of course, want to or intend to.

    Neither do I. Solidarity!

  8. Walton says

    Ugh. I had never read Stefanelli’s blog before this incident, but based on what I’ve seen in the past few days, I have to say that he’s behaved in an immature, bullying and pointlessly aggressive way. And there is never a justification for using misogynistic slurs to attack one’s critics, or for giving a platform to those who do.

  9. Mattir says

    It’s really sad, because. I’d actually enjoyed a lot of Stefanelli’s blog before the last few entries. Now I just feel sort of queasy about the whole thing, I don’t expect or want to agree with every opinion expressed by the bloggers I read regularly, but I do expect not to be called a cunt and to encounter at least a modicum of good faith in discussion of areas of disagreement. Guess I can cross that blog off the list.

  10. Cam says

    I missed the insinuation as well. I went back and took another look at “Metamorphoses”, and if that’s where it’s supposed to be, I’m still missing it. Anyway, if you were the rotten scoundrel he’d like to paint you as, you wouldn’t be insinuating — you’d be gloating and rubbing your wicked little hands together in glee.

  11. says

    He has to mean Metamorphoses, because that’s the one where I said he was leaving. I did know it was a newsflash, but I didn’t know it was a secret. Al forgot to tell anyone it was a secret, apparently.

    I looked at it again too, and it’s not there.

  12. says

    Steve Schuler came back to say “hahaha drama queen hahahahaha.”

    Dude. I didn’t ask for this. You think I like this? You think I chose it? You think I want it?

    You could go back to firstB&W, before July 2011 when it all started, and look through the archive – you wouldn’t find me talking about myself, or talking about people talking about me.

    You callous giggling shit.

  13. Rodney Nelson says

    Al’s blog wasn’t one I read regularly. He did write some interesting posts but not all the time. The second time I ever commented on his blog was when he showed he didn’t understand Schrödinger’s Rapist and attacked a strawman.

    Al is upset because Ophelia pulled the rug out from under his “farewell cruel world, I’m off to join the circus” announcement. Since his video with Reap Paden made his FTB exit obvious, he upstaged himself.

    Goodbye Al. Good luck in your future endeavors.

  14. Joey Maloney says


    Yeah, yeah, I know, if it doesn’t interest you, don’t read it, the scroll bar’s right over there.

    But I’d rather read stuff by Ophelia that does interest me ’cause she’s awesome. I guess I’m just reaching my limit for all the internecine blogfights around here over the past few months.

    Carry on.

  15. Maureen Brian says

    Gawd! These men! Their egos are so fragile, even the intelligent ones. I remain convinced that Al is intelligent – he’s written some good stuff in the past – but wise, not so much.

    When I take over the world which, of course, I’m about to do any minute, I’m going to insist that men get ten years’ basic training as a woman. To toughen then up, of course.

  16. says

    Yes! The Teiresias thing. Teiresias spent time as both genders, and reported that being a woman is far harder. This in ancient Greece, hardly a bastion of feminism.

  17. Woo_Monster, Sniffer of Starfarts says

    I guess I’m just reaching my limit for all the internecine blogfights around here over the past few months.

    Everyone stop the presses, Joey’s limit has been reached! Just STFU everybody, if you are just going to persist in writing things that aren’t interesting to Joey.

    Wait, who is this asshole, joey?

    Gawd! These men! Their egos are so fragile, even the intelligent ones. I remain convinced that Al is intelligent – he’s written some good stuff in the past – but wise, not so much.

    Al is a HERO for standing up and voicing his opinions, Y U HATE FREETHOUGHT?!?!

  18. Aratina Cage says

    I mean, Jesus fracking cracker Christ, it is her RIGHT to FREE SPEECH to say that he was frickin’ leaving freakin’ FTB!!! Why does he want to DENY her that right?!?!

  19. says

    @ Ophelia

    If I remember the myth wasn’t it that Tiresias was asked in an argument who enjoyed sex more men or women and sided with Zeus saying women enjoyed it more. Having looked it up… http://www.pantheon.org/articles/t/tiresias.html

    Is there another version/aspect of the myth I’m not finding?

    *note I’m not saying women don’t have it hard I’m just not sure that’s how that myth went.*

  20. says

    There are a lot of versions of most (or maybe all) the myths. I think the one I mentioned is in Medea – the one by Euripides, not the one by Seneca, or the one by Ovid. I’m not sure though.

  21. Morgan says

    …Why would you even want to insinuate he’d been kicked off the network instead of leaving voluntarily? Wouldn’t that play in to the “FTBullies can’t handle dissent!” narrative, and be something detractors would be insinuating about you? (And indeed, if he’d been kicked off surely you’d know exactly why – unless I’m mistaken about how back-channel discussions here work – and it’d make more sense for you to give the exact reasons rather than vaguely insinuating?)

  22. briane says

    Don’t pick on us big brawny, hyper-intelligent guys. It might hurt our fee-fees. You emasculating wenches, with your not so brawny, less than hyper intelligence. It’s hurtful that we supermen outgun you, erect inpenetrable walls before you, and you still manage to best us, cause us chagrin, and generally make us feel like a 5 year old with ADHD and rage problem who’s on a sugar rush and can’t find widdle boo boo cause we need a hug.
    We men are superior, how dare you make us feel less than numbe? Inferior women! Even our egos shatter in a superiority manner! Rage, rant, huffle, puff…puff. Can I get a hug? Boo boo?

  23. briane says

    Brian, there there there. Get into your jammies and I’ll read you a story.

    Can I have bot-bot and blanky?

  24. Joey Maloney says

    Wait, who is this asshole, joey?

    Well, at the very least, someone who can read a differing opinion without spooging rhetorical rage all over your internets.

    Take my advice, why don’t you? The scroll bar’s right there —>

    I’ll be up in the thread about Violentacrez if you want to throw another tantrum on me.

  25. Woo_Monster, Sniffer of Starfarts says

    …rhetorical rage…

    Don’t flatter yourself. You caused a slight face-palm, which prompted a little mockery.

    And what is this shit about a “differing opinion”? You didn’t offer any substantial opinion on the OP, you merely stated that you were bored.

  26. Bjarte Foshaug says

    I have a note to Al as well. In the comments section of your post on depression I wrote:

    …thanks for writing this, Al. You definitely are useful to very many.

    I take it back.

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