Just a small one, and utterly routine, but then that’s just it – it’s routine.
An ad I saw on tv last night, or half saw, because I was doing something else besides – probably playing “toss the squeaky hedgehog” with Cooper. Something about a thing for guys, a thing guys like, a guy type thing. A cable channel, or service, or something like that. Anyway the “don’t you wish you could join all this fun” part was guys watching a game on tv and doing the usual sporty chatter and laughter.
Line of dialogue:
He throws like my sister!
Jolly guyish laughter.
So. Young girls exposed to that get more twigs added to the stereotype that Girls Can’t Throw and Sport Is For Guys and Girls Trying To Do Sport Is Just Funny Always and Hahaha Girls Throwing Hahaha.
Boys and men exposed to that get their existing stereotypes to that effect further augmented and entrenched.
And it’s just routine. Hardly anyone will even notice (so the stereotype will do its work below the radar).
I’ll never tell anyone they throw like a girl, cause last time I said that, my sister knocked me out by throwing a dodgeball directly at my face.
I am so fortunate to have grown up in the ’70s.
I remember a Dennis the Menace strip in which Dennis taunted Joey for “throwing like a girl” — and then immediately took a ball hard to his face, thrown by Gina.
Whenever I hear men refer to another man or a group of men as “girls” or “ladies”, I want to rage. Unfortunately it tends to be on television or in a movie, so they wouldn’t hear the rage.
It’s not fun being such a lesser form of life that it’s an insult to be someone like me.
From everyday sexism to misogyny is but a short step. It worries me that this is entrenched in, aided, abetted and condoned by, many cultures across the world. I see no light at the end of this particular tunnel. Is there hope?
In my house, televised comments re: throwing/screaming/crying ‘like a girl’ tend to cue a loud, indignant chorus of “NOT THAT THERE’S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT!”. My kids DO notice, and they are outraged that anyone would think like that. Their passion gives me hope that the next generation might just be a teensy bit better at this.
Must keep pointing this out. Thanks Ophelia. Hate the equalisation of women and girls with weakness. Plays into the notion of them being non-persons.
Two ways to respond: point out the numerous incredibly talented women who can “throw better” (which is an unappetising though factually-based response); highlight broader problem that this is no better than a, say, racist or homophobic slur (though, these also occur!).
If you assume an entire group of people is deficient in a particular area, based purely on their biology, you’re working in a very narrow worldview. There are nuances to this statement – my biology prevents me from extreme running – but it doesn’t disprove it as I think an important general principle.
Anyone using the same phrase with ‘hits like a girl’ needs to come to my tae kwon do class too. They hit hard…and kick harder!
From “According to Jim:”
“I’m gonna go home and get rid of my entire porn collection. It’s hard to watch girls when you think of them as having homes and families.”
Hey! They’re not supposed to give it away! Just an FYI, “According to Jim” is one of the most sexist shows on TV.
I overheard a girl saying “you throw like a girl!” to her brother the other day, she must have been about 9 or 10. I think at some point there is a total disconnect or disassociation from the word ‘girl’ or ‘woman’ for female people. I asked a friend about it and she said she felt the same way as a kid. Somehow they’re always talking about someone else, not you. I know it was true for me until I discovered feminism. Even now it takes an effort to identify with ‘woman.’
Maybe his sister is just extremely uncoordinated and it’s not a slam on women. No? Yeah I didn’t think so.
Why didn’t you contribute a signed pic to the charity auction? I would have paid $200 for one. Now I’m stuck bidding on PZ’s.
The charity auction?
(I’m bad at keeping up.)
Anyone who thinks “Girls Trying To Do Sport Is Just Funny Always” has not seen modern women’s roller derby. (In which many women call themselves “rollergirls” or “derby dames” or “dolls”… but are not to be lightly dismissed.)
squeeeeeeee. OB replied to me! Yes, they are raising money for Doctors Without Borders.
😀 What am I, royalty? I reply all over the place! I’m easy!
Feel stupid about the auction though. I never get caught up.
Ophelia, you’re like Cher. She’s a Twitter phenomenon. Everyone wants a tweet back from her. I have, as you may know, dedicated my 2012 to the project.
Bask in glory.
When Simon Pegg’s alien comedy “Paul” was out there was a billboard advertising it directly opposite the entrance of one of our local primary schools. It said “only girls phone home”. So every kid coming out of there each day got to see “girl” equated with “person I regard with contempt”.
Well that brings things nicely full circle – Simon Pegg plays a part in that “using your army of fans to bully critics on Twitter” article I posted about a few hours ago.
Damn it. Simon Pegg too. Nope, not surprised. It’s everywhere.
I once watched a coach working with a girls’ softball team which was formed up in two rows throwing balls back and forth. The ones the coach hadn’t yet reached were using a pushing motion (“throwing like a girl”), while the ones who had been coached were throwing overhand. It’s a simple skill that has to be learned.
This kind of thing always reminds me of a loud-mouthed schmuck named Bobby Riggs who fancied himself as a tennis player. He used to go around mouthing off about how women were bad at tennis and no woman could beat any man. He finally played a match against Billie Jean King and she wiped the floor with his sorry ass. Haven’t heard anything more from Mr Riggs since then – wonder how he’s doing.
I really need to revive that series on my blog…
One of my best friends will say “I don’t want to sound like a girl, but…”
I told her not to use this when my girls are around. Yes, she’s one of those women who think that stuff like affirmative action discriminates against minorities…
Reclaim
I got tweeted at by a few celebrities. Most recently by comedian Marc Maron when I mildly expressed disappointment at his using “cunt” (or maybe it was “bitch”) as an insult against a woman he didn’t like. I think it took him by surprise since he thought of me as a “friendly,” having interacted with & retweeted me on a number occasions, etc.
Maron was not pleased. While his tweet was something mundane like complaining about a woman behind him in line or whatever, he fell back on the “I’m a comedian” and “it was a joke” excuse.
Except it wasn’t a joke, it was just him venting about someone he didn’t know who had irritated him. No humor, just an insult.
Oddly a “friend” (since unfriended) not only took Maron’s side but told me I should feel lucky to have been insulted by a celebrity.
Overall I prefer my twitter interactions with Jamie Kilstein.
I haven’t listened to Maron’s podcast since.
Yeah, I think I heard that short step last night on my car radio. A local ‘classic’ radio station is giving away tickets to a Playboy mansion party, which they described as “heaven on earth.”
Orly? As a middle-aged woman, it’s not really my idea of heaven on earth. I guess they mean for people that actually matter.
#19,
Yes, most kids start out with an intuitive but really bad throwing technique (pushing from the elbow & wrong foot forward), and will stick with that if they aren’t shown how to do it right. Boys usually learn this stuff very early while playing ball with their dads, and it’s annoying the hell out of me that many parents are happy for their girls to keep throwing “like a girl”.
As for the definition of really “girly” throwing… I think it’s hard to imagine a more stereotypically girly sport than Rhythmic Gymnastics, with all the glitter and frilly outfits and anime-figured girls wiggling their tiny bums and walking on pointy toes and waving ribbons, so whatever these gymnasts do is surely girly by definition. It’s worth watching some Olympics footage and appreciate the strength and accuracy of their throws and catches: Each throw gives them 3-5 seconds worth of time to get into some absurdly contorted position (usually involving doing the splits while standing on one toe and bending backwards into an upside-down position) in which they catch their ball (or ribbon, or ring, or clubs) blindly with an outstretched hand (or toe).
I would LOVE to be able to throw in such a girly way.
@Bad Jim- you’re right. But it has to be learned by boys too. 🙂
When I was a high school cross country runner, I went to a large meet where running related clothing was being sold.
One of the shirts said something like “I run like a girl, try to keep up.”
I loved it. I didn’t buy it because I was never a particularly fast runner, but in retrospect, I wish I had.