Get a whole suite

Libby Anne on father-daughter “purity balls.” You what? Yes that’s right: father-daughter big fancy parties (not testicles) to celebrate female virginity. Yes that’s right: Daddy takes Princess to a ball. Really. They’re on a date.

Dudes – get a room.


  1. says

    Dudes – get a room.

    Umpf, I find that about as inappropriate as the idea of “purity balls” themsleves.
    The reality of child abuse by their fathers is too painful to make jokes about it.

    On the subject, it’s horrible, yuck, makes my toenails curl. That’s creepy.

  2. ginmar says

    From reading about these things before, I’d say this is the only way Daddy will pay attention to his daughters—-if she’s a pretty, pretty princess. It’s one of the few times he’ll pay attention to a lowly daughter. Poor kids.

  3. says

    Giliell – well it wasn’t really a joke joke. It was an angry joke – those grown men really ought to be aware of what they’re doing.

    The pretty pretty princess thing creeps me the hell out.

  4. sailor1031 says

    The girl on the left (above) doesn’t look as if she enjoys daddy holding her like that. Looking at the pics from last year’s ball – that is some creepy stuff. Is this shit legal FFS?

  5. papango says

    That’s just so gross.

    I didn’t always get on with my Dad and we often have a hard time inding common ground. But if there’s one thig we do agree on it’s that neither of us wants to go to a party about the other’s sex life.

  6. says

    I hate the creepiness of this, but what I hate more is the way it devalues father-daughter relationships. We’ve developed this horrible cultural meme that men are not to be trusted with children. Why can’t a father honestly love & hug his daughter in public without someone calling it creepy and sexual? It’s because of these fucking morons and their patriarchal ideas, is why.

    (Yeah, sorry, not very coherent. I don’t have time to tease this out into a well-structured argument this morning.)

  7. anthrosciguy says

    The pictures I’ve seen from purity balls remind me so much of the sexualized child beauty pageant girls. Ophelia’s closing “get a room” just struck me as a sarcastic and sardonic comment on this fact.

    These balls and the beauty contests with little girls are so different from what you see with little girls playing princess with each other, not for the sake of adults. When the girls are doing it for themselves and with their friends it’s one thing, but it’s super creepy when adults are driving.

  8. Aliasalpha says

    Is… is that REALLY the photo they’re using to advertise this thing? Aside ffrom the clothes the kids are wearing, they look like they’re on the way to a funeral, not one happy face amongst them

  9. julian says

    It’s not all bad. Look! They’ve got a black guy and his daughter on the front page!

    Yeah, same thing I said first time hearing about this, Now I know who all those creepy father-daughter incest stories on literotica are for.

  10. Marie the Bookwyrm says

    Good golly! That girl on the right looks like she’s 8 or 9 years old! Who the hell thinks a girl that young needs to go to a purity ball!?!

    (I mean the whole idea is seriously creepy. But to think that they start that young. EEEEWWWWWWW.)

  11. Bruce Gorton says

    What creeps me out about all of this is that it goes against the whole point to parents.

    Raising children should be about raising children. It should be about giving the child the equipment to live as his or her own person.

    These dominionists want to dominate children. They are about squashing the child into being someone else’s person.

  12. Musical Atheist says

    There’s a documentary from 2008 on Colorado Springs purity ball at Atheist Media Blog, called ‘The Virgin Daughters’. It’s very interesting, and one of the most disturbingly inappropriate parts is seeing a father refute a suggestion of incest, and stating to the camera crew that his physical relationship is with his wife only, in front of his daughter. To me, that says so much about how unclear the boundaries of appropriate behaviour are for these men.

  13. Musical Atheist says

    Anyone notice this sentence in the ‘Why’ section of the Golden Isles website? (My emphasis.)

    Does your daughter know you as her protector? You can demonstrate your concern to promote her physical, emotional, and spiritual security and need for protection.

    It’s not just about telling your daughter you are protecting her – it’s about making sure she knows she needs to be protected.

    Seems like a contradiction to me, to promote her sense of security and undermine it at the same time.

  14. says

    These dominionists want to dominate children. They are about squashing the child into being someone else’s person.

    Absolutely. The whole (incredibly arrogant) 200 year plan is about that – just assuming that all your children and all their children and all their children’s children and so on will be clones of all-important You, and will fulfill your plan for world domination.

    Great point about the contradiction, Musical Atheist. That’s the essence of the purity obsession, really – making the entire female sex permanently in terror of being invaded, defiled, deflowered, polluted, contaminated – of letting that filthy pit between their legs get dirtied up by an outsider. It’s a pre-contraception mindset…to put it mildly.

  15. jshaffer says

    I wonder how much of the willingness of the daughters involved is the result of actual belief. How many are just going along with it because of some bribery, subtle or not, on the father’s part or simply for the attention from their father’s. These father- daughter “purity balls” are a rather new phenomenon (AFAIK) so it’ll be interesting to see how many of the young girls and women taking part in them today turn out; if they continue with the doctrines expressed or if they rebel and how often. I also wonder what affect this might have on the legitimate relationships between the daughters and their fathers in the future.

    From the men’s perspective, I can imagine that it might be difficult for some men to really relate to their daughters, especially if they have the rigid ideas about gender roles the religious beliefs involved espouse. I think it would be few and far between for those that really do not desire to have a healthy relationship with their child but the dogma of some religions seem predicated on making that the case*. Again, these events seem to be a pretty new occurrence, having gained popularity within the last decade as far as I can tell. I wonder if this is an expression on the part of these men to have a real connection with their daughters that their religion said they couldn’t have and the only form it could acceptably take is just as twisted as the initial doctrine.

    Regardless, this fetishism of virginity and purity is disturbing at best. Still, this may be the end result of advocates of parental right dominating in the many debates we have about parent/ child topics, such as home- schooling, discipline and vaccinations. With the idea that parents have all but absolute rights and control over their children I’m not surprised by events like this. That being said, we might be seeing a turn from this overshadowing line of thinking to one with more emphasis on parental responsiblity to raise children that can actually integrate into society. That some parents are being prosecuted, albit lightly, for allowing their child to die instead of getting them proper medical help due to religious reasons is an indicator that something may be changing. If that continues to get pushed, creepy events like “purity ball” could be on their way out just as quickly as they came in.

    * This naturally applies to associations other than just familial.

  16. steve oberski says

    Giliell, connaiseuse des choses bonnes says:

    Umpf, I find that about as inappropriate as the idea of “purity balls” themsleves.
    The reality of child abuse by their fathers is too painful to make jokes about it.

    In what sense is this not child abuse ?

  17. John Morales says

    Oh, come on!

    Gotta teach little girls proper values:
    * Sexuality is icky;
    * Virginity is an asset to be cashed-in (by daddy)
            (corollary: non-virgins are worth less*)


    * Or should that be worthless?


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