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Aug 25 2012

Hearing voices

Goodbye Neil Armstrong, and thanks for everything.

Did you know he was a Muslim? The Zionist media won’t be telling you that, of course, but it’s the truth.

What happened is, he heard the call to prayer while he was strolling around on the moon, and that was so awesome that he was all “O Allah” and he totally converted.

Ok no it’s not the truth, it’s an urban legend.

 

18 comments

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  1. 1
    Kausik Datta

    Holy shit, did you look at the comments after the About.com article you linked to? Good grief. It’s full of Teh Burning Stoopid!!

    [Okay, okay, I know... My fault entirely for wading into the comments. I'm a sucker for punishment.]

  2. 2
    Ophelia Benson

    Ah no, I didn’t. Shall I? Oh go on, be a devil.

  3. 3
    Taslima Nasreen

    Didn’t Curiosity hear any O Allah sound yet on Mars?

  4. 4
    Ophelia Benson

    Ok that was fun.

  5. 5
    Zinc Avenger (Sarcasm Tags 3.0 Compliant)

    The stupid… It burns decompresses.

  6. 6
    'Tis Himself

    Armstrong didn’t say “Good luck Mr. Gorsky” either.

  7. 7
    Ophelia Benson

    Taslima, I bet Curiosity has heard it 100 times but NASA is keeping it secret. [cue scary music]

  8. 8
    Sabio Lantz

    Armstrong was one of few people to get so close to Allah. If anyone could have heard his voice — it should have been him.

  9. 9
    Hunt

    I would have assumed it was static, or someone in Ground Control fucking with me. It always bugged me when the astronauts got into space and suddenly got all teary and religious “O heavenly light” and that type of BS. I wonder if we had an active program today, would they still feel free to spew Bible crap on us?

  10. 10
    Ani J. Sharmin

    Sad news. :(

    I watched a Young Turks video a few days ago called “Apollo 11 Moon Landing Letter” that was quite moving. Neil Armstrong took this one little step that so many have dreamed of. I can’t imagine what it must be like to actually step onto the moon … and to know in the back of your mind that no one’s ever done it before, that your’re so far away from home. It must be kind of awesome and frightening all at once.

    Also, I never knew about the urban legend. Personally, I have never understood the this-person-did-something-great-therefore-they-must-be-a-member-of-my-group thing. I don’t pretend that Christians who were great scientists or civil rights leaders were atheists.

  11. 11
    Roger

    What happened is, he heard the call to prayer while he was strolling around on the moon, and that was so awesome that he was all “O Allah” and he totally converted.

    Impossible.
    He never went to the moon: it was all dont an MGM/Walt Disney film studio.

  12. 12
    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk-

    It reminds me of a very old joke about Juri Gagarin.
    After his first flight in space, he meets Chruchtchov who asks: Did you see god? Gararin say yes and gets 100.000$ to keep quiet.
    He meets the Pope who asks: Did you see god? He says no and gets another 100.000$. Then he meets Kennedy who says ” you know, half my citizens are religious, the other half isn’t, so, just for curiosity’s sake (weren’t those times?), did you see god?”
    “Yes, and she’s black”

    Goodbye, Mr. Armstrong

  13. 13
    One Thousand Needles, lumper-splitter

    THIS IS THE PROOF TO BE A MUSLIM. THIS IS THE NATURLITY OF ALLAH.

    I have stared into the void.

  14. 14
    Rrr

    Impossible.

    He never went to the moon: it was all dont an MGM/Walt Disney film studio.

    So, what he heard was just the score from 2001 beaming. Is it too late to go back and ask him now? ;-( Or maybe he’s just cooling heels at the Mars bar? ;-)

  15. 15
    Shoe

    But on the moon, which way is Mecca?

  16. 16
    Rrr

    Probably in the general direction of that blue-green mooney thing in the sky. It might be slightly difficult to kneel thataway, though. Need an erect rug for that.

  17. 17
    F [i'm not here, i'm gone]

    In space, no one can hear Allah scream.

  18. 18
    Rrr

    Yes, that is one place. Conditional upon any actual scream, obviously.

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