They like to eat things that are bigger than they are

I should save that title for a horror novel.

The other day, I switched my juvenile Latrodectus from a diet of nice snackable fruit flies to huge, relatively speaking, mealworms. I posted a photo of that right here.

I was curious to see how they would cope with such a large prey item. No problem! Here’s the result: the mealworm was sucked completely dry, leaving nothing but a transparent tube of cuticle.

I don’t know how they do it. The prey animal was completely hollowed out. Maybe I’ll have to try to capture it in timelapse.

Right wing culture is so bad

The right-wingers are now outraged by the announcement that BadBunny will be doing the Superbowl halftime show — he’s a Puerto Rican! He sings in Spanish! It’s Reggaeton, and as we all know, that ain’t real music! They’re torn up with anguish, that the music during halftime may not be twangy country music about pickup trucks and beer and unfaithful women. It’s very sad for them. TPUSA announced that they would host an alternative halftime show, but they haven’t provided any details and haven’t any specific artist they would include.

So someone posted a fake playbill listing an epic bunch of conservative artists. People fell for it.

Kid Rock
Ted Nugent
Travis Tritt
Jason Aldean
Aaron Lewis (of Staind)
John Rich
Lee Greenwood
Forgigato Blow
Featuring a guest appearance from MEASLES

That’s a horrible collection of washed-up freaks and fossils, all packed into an imaginary 20 minute show. I like that special guest, which should have given the game away, but I found people actually asking what band Measles was.

It’s all cope. The conservatives are desperate to capture popular culture, but they aren’t popular, and they don’t understand what’s good about music or entertainment.

All of this reflects what is a small ray of hope in our bleak political moment. MAGA’s relationship with pop culture only has two forms: Complete cluelessness and/or resentment that most people think their taste stinks. This matters, because it’s been a truism on the far-right for decades now that capturing the culture is the key to obtaining their larger political goals. MAGA influencers love to repeat, like parrots, Andrew Breitbart’s motto that “politics is downstream from culture.” The Christian right also has a version of this, which Kirk promoted: The “seven mountains mandate,” which holds that is crucial for conservative Christians to control pop culture. Over the years, untold amounts of money have been poured by right-wing donors and investors into remaking the culture in MAGA’s image, in hopes that will turn American hearts toward authoritarianism and evangelical Christianity.

But they are throwing their money to the wind. As I wrote recently, for all the hype around Kirk’s memorial, the actual event didn’t resonate beyond his existing fanbase. Nearly all the performers hailed from the world of worship music; there was nary a nod to what might resonate with people outside white evangelical subculture. This reflects a reality that the mainstream media ignored in the wake of Kirk’s murder. Even though he was widely known on college campuses, due to the ubiquity of his videos falsely promising to dunk on liberal college kids, he wasn’t well-liked. Although 94% of college students said in a recent survey they had heard of Kirk, a full 70% said they didn’t agree with his views.

Their idea of comedy is Joe Rogan and his stable of half-witted hangers-on. The Daily Wire — Ben Shapiro’s company — had a whole entertainment division to make movies and TV shows (remember Lady Ballers?), and it’s disintegrating as we watch. It’s CEO Jeremy Boreing has stepped down, and right now they’re just a money sink for billionaires. They’re coming out with a fantasy series, The Pendragon Cycle, which the teaser trailer reveals to be a series of set pieces of major battles featuring a dozen extras on each side, long slow character portraits, and guys with beards yelling a lot.

I think it’s going to bomb. Boreing decided to trade in the limp humor of his previous effort for taking himself far too seriously, and that doesn’t work.

The Morris protest march

We had a good turnout, somewhere around 100 people, despite the damp gray morning and intermittent rain. We had one cool cat show up, there was also a dinosaur somewhere in the crowd.

For a gang of anti-American agents of antifa, there was a lot of patriotism on display, with flags everywhere. Mary and I were carrying the new Minnesota flag — a few people asked us what it represented, I guess the update hasn’t gotten to everyone yet.

We also had dogs show up. Everyone despises Trump.

We did have one loudmouthed jerk show up, who raged at us at the top of his lungs, looking positively demented as he screamed about money being spent on foreign countries and the Democratic government shutdown. He was quietly separated from the group and wandered off to die of apoplexy somewhere else, I presume. He apparently worked at the UMM physical plant and was laid off recently, and is very resentful.

Good morning, good crowd, we did our part in the wave of protests sweeping across the country.

You didn’t know you’d wake up this morning to hear an old man raving about teenaged boys’ sperm counts

RFK jr went on a rant about sperm. It’s a national security threat, you know!

Today, the average teenager in this country has 50 percent of the sperm count, 50 percent of the testosterone as a 65-year-old man. Our girls are hitting puberty six years early, and that’s bad, but also our parents aren’t having children.

Parents who want to have children do not have access. I have seven children. I feel that God has blessed me with that and I can’t imagine how different my life would be if I did not have that blessing.

Sperm counts are known to decline with age, meaning a teenage boy is likely to have a much higher count than a man in his late sixties, according to experts.

our parents aren’t having children… think about that one for a moment.

Then consider Parents who want to have children do not have access. Access to what, you may ask, and also what makes them parents if they don’t have children? My head hurts reading whatever that ratfucker has to say about health.

It’s true that sperm counts have been reported to be declining, although very poor sampling of a variable parameter adds some doubt to the conclusion. We tend not to get sperm counts from teenagers! But I’d agree with him that environmental hazards, especially the ones that big capitalist corporations tend to spew everywhere, are almost certainly damaging the quantity and quality of gametes humans are producing. We should probably do something about that, but Republicans aren’t going to change anything that might affect the bottom line of Dow or Monsanto, so seeing a lackey of corporate interests piously expressing concern about forever chemicals contaminating the environment leaves me unmoved.

Also, making babies is a more complex process than just having a man making sperm (that’s probably the smallest part of the problem). Conception requires a consenting woman, and also requires that the parents have the time and money and interest to invest in raising a child. If you want more healthy babies in America, provide better medical care with low cost first — pumping up male sperm counts accomplishes nothing if no one wants or can afford children.

As for RFK jr himself — he has six children by two mothers (I think he’s counting his current girlfriend’s child as his own, which is fair). All of his marriages ended in divorce, and one was exceptionally acrimonious, and one of his former wives died of suicide. I don’t think he should be talking about “blessings”. He’s an old rich fuck and is not a role model for successful parenting. One of the causes of his divorce was the discovery of a book where he listed all of his extramarital affairs!

Wait…I thought conservatives blamed feminism for declining birth rates, but now it’s all due to those tainted, poisoned men shooting blanks? Cool.

English, do you speak it, Kelbie Murphy?

Dumbass

I don’t think she should graduate from college until she passes a basic English literacy test. She read a simple sentence in her “expensive” textbook and misinterpreted it.

Kelbie Murphy, a senior at the university, paid roughly $100 for an assigned textbook in her International Public Relations course. In Chapter 8, the opening passage reads: “An internet search produces the following modifier for identity: corporate, sexual, digital, public, racial, national, brand, and even Christian (a U.S.-based white supremacist group).”

“The way it was worded, it listed several marginalized groups, but then only called Christians to be White supremacists,” Murphy told Fox News Digital in an exclusive interview. “But the scariest thing is that the book was written in 2007.”

That’s not a particularly expensive textbook.

The fact that “identity” when modified by “Christian” refers to a racist, white supremacist organization outraged her because she couldn’t comprehend that “Christian identity” is a narrow subset of Christian thought, and thought it was maligning all of the Christian faith (although maybe it was an accurate misreading, that wasn’t what the textbook was saying). She got lots of views on TikTok, and even got highlighted on Fox News, two places where ignorance prospers.

Dan McClellan dismantles Murphy’s whole argument.

The University of North Georgia should be ashamed if they cave in to her lies.

All for moi?

Yesterday, I started moving the larger juvenile Latrodectus to their very own special homes, and I give them a day to build a cobweb before giving them a homecoming meal. This young lady got handed a whole mealworm — imagine giving a teenager a whole cow and permission to kill and eat it. That’s what this was like.

She kept tapping it like she could hardly believe it was all hers. She’s been living on fruit flies for the past month or so, so this was like a miracle meal plopped into her lap. If spiders had laps.

Notice how she has the white juvenile markings on her dorsal abdomen. Those will fade. She also has a red hourglass on her ventral abdomen, which will not.

He is embarrassingly tacky

We’re in the middle of a Republican shut down of the government, and Donald Trump is making ridiculous redecorating plans.

His other second-term developments include a gilded makeover for the White House, paving over the Rose Garden and constructing a $250m ballroom, as well as the clearing of homeless encampments throughout the capital.

Gilding the White House? Jesus fuck.

You could build a lot of low-income housing for $250 million. Just saying.

This is what he does in his free time?

He also wants to build a monument, the Arc de Trump.

US President Donald Trump wants to build a triumphal arch across from the Lincoln Memorial in Washington DC, the latest in his efforts to make over the capital city in his style.

The so-called Arc de Trump would commemorate the country’s 250th anniversary next year and is reportedly being privately funded by Trump’s supporters.

He wants to build a pointless monument in just a year? You know it’s going to be cheaply and sloppily built, and will fall apart shortly afterwards. Plaster and lath, with gilding. Yuck. And who cares about laws and regulations? Not the Republicans.

Plans for Trump’s proposed arch are still taking shape but it is expected to be located across the Potomac River on federal land inside the district’s boundaries.

Developing a memorial in the District of Columbia is complex given its unique status as the capital city, according to Dr Christine Henry, director of the Center for Historic Preservation at the University of Mary Washington in Fredericksburg, Virginia.

New commemorations typically need congressional approval as part of a 24-step plan developed by the National Capital Planning Commission (NCPC), which approves designs along with the Commission of Fine Arts (CFA).

Even the craven New York Times is calling this for what it is.

Critics, including a guest essayist for the New York Times, have called his Oval Office remodel a “Gilded Rococo Nightmare”.

I hope the next Democratic administration, if there is one, is prepared to budget for demolition and cleanup.

Needs more spiders

A reader sent me a comment about how Catholics tell stories that they claim are in the Bible that aren’t, and that specifically they don’t include spiders. I had to double check. Here are all the Bible verses that mention spiders.

Pathetic. For one, they’re about spider webs, not spiders, and the second one is about lizards. Do they think lizards and spiders are the same thing? They’re so desperate to pad their list of spider facts from the Bible that they include reptiles.

Speaking of padding, here’s my correspondent’s tale of Catholic fable-making.

I made a comment on Bluesky that it wasn’t until I was studying the Bible in Religion class at a Catholic High School that I realized how many of the stories I was told by nuns in grade school weren’t actually in the Bible. I gave, as an example, the story of how Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, in their flight to Egypt to escape Herod Antipas’ attempt to kill all potential Kings of the Jews, they hid in a cave from pursuing soldiers. After they entered the cave, spiders spun webs across the entrance to the cave causing the soldiers to believe that the Holy Family couldn’t have possibly entered the cave.

A commenter wondered if the story I related was inspired by a similar one about David fleeing from King Saul for the exact same reason. Unlike the story about the Holy Family, the tale of David hiding in a cave, minus the spiders, is actually in the Bible.

I interpret this to mean Christians realize that there is a serious lack of spider relevance in their holy book, and they are crying out for more.

The problem with trying to make sense of a bad sci-fi movie

Have you ever sat down to watch a movie and realized, within 5 minutes, that it was going to suck, but you’d walked to the theater and your knees were aching and you just need to sit and rest for a while before beginning the clumsy trek home again, so you decide that letting your brain suffer for two hours is better than wrecking your legs some more? No? Maybe I was too specific.

Anyway, I tortured my self with Tron: Ares last night. I’d seen the original Tron when it first came out in 1982, it sucked then, and I should have known better, but over 40 years have passed and the memory had faded. Now I remember. Remind me when the sequel comes out (yes, it sets up a sequel) that I shouldn’t waste my time.

The summary: it’s a movie about unexplainable magical phenomena gussied up with a lot of bad technobabble. I can enjoy a movie that has magic as a key premise, but the technobabble kept bringing me up short, with a jolt: whoever wrote this thing doesn’t understand physics or biology, and for a movie that is ostensibly built around programming computers, they don’t have the vaguest notion of how those machines and skills work. It’s simultaneously magic + coding. Hated it.

What the heck is a “particle laser”? It’s central to the story, but it makes no sense.

Also, Jared Leto.

I shoulda stayed home.