Here’s the state of the American government:
Louie Gohmert displayed that on the floor of congress — an uninterpretable tangle of lines and random words and odd logos, all with the intent of somehow indicting Hillary Clinton in a non-scandal. This is where we’re at. Louie Gohmert, in the running for the dumbest person in congress. A bullshit chart. A ridiculous conspiracy theory. And we’re helpless — we have no mechanism for prying the reins of power out of the hands of dangerous idiots.
richardelguru says
Pic is a bit small, I can’t read the names. Does that matter?
What a Maroon, living up to the 'nym says
That’s all part of the nefariousness of all this. They don’t want you to read it.
lumipuna says
I always despised graphs that purport to show relationships between things without providing any information other than “there is a relationship”. Maybe Gohmert held a filibuster-length speech explaining this graph?
(Said someone on Twitter: Looks like Sheriff David Clarke’s jacket)
ibbica says
Must be false, with that many ‘connections’ and no Kevin Bacon…
/s 🙄
Ogvorbis: Swimming without a parachute. says
This poster is to a flow chart as diarrhea is to a good healthy bowel movement.*
Maybe this is a diagram of the way his mind works?
It looks like a map of a subway system designed by Escher.
Maybe the green lines are the imaginary connections?
===
* Sorry ’bout that. As I get older, I value a good BM more and more.
chigau (違う) says
Looks like a map of the Tokyo transit system.
HappyNat says
I looked at this a little last night and my favorite is that there is a direct line between a box labeled “Obama” and another box labeled “Obama”. That’s how deep this runs, multiple Obamas and they are connected. Not sure how we didn’t see this sooner . . . .
xmp999 says
All that’s missing from that chart are reverse vampires and lizard people
Holms says
I like how “Hillary Clinton Emails” has links to Cheryl Mills, Ben Rhodes, Heather Samuelson, Loretta Lynch AG, and Comey… but is not linked to either Hillary Clinton herself or even “Hillary Clinton Secret Server.” Oh and congratulations to Obama, Comey and Mueller being on there twice!
This chart was made by a dunce.
Marcus Ranum says
This is how the Russian involvement in Trump’s election gets turned into a non-scandal: it’s all competing conspiracy theories and the whole thing gets moral equivalenced away. A huge chunk of the public has become comfortable/inured to this kind of rubbish – they’re going to assume that the democrats are just playing the same game, back at Trump and ignore it. The sad thing is if you drew a map of the relationships of the players in the Trump campaign/Russian oligarch influence/Wikileaks it would look about the same. Get out front of the public with your bullshit first, then when something complicated comes along, it’s going to look like your bullshit.
Isilzha Mir says
There doesn’t seem to be any scheme for the size, shape, or color of the nodes. Comey’s on there twice, but once in a gray ellipse and once in a yellow diamond. I doubt a key would help, either.
birgerjohansson says
The red square with “Russia” should be a red star! Or enlarged so you can add an image of lesbian vampire liberals & black werevolf SJWs goose-stepping across the Red Square*.
*To get this you need to have memories of the October parades of the Soviet union.
Doc Bill says
Hey, don’t y’all go about casting aspersions on Louie’s asparagus! They love the inbred little weasel down there in the piney woods of Texas.
birgerjohansson says
Two Obamas? I always suspected they were two identical twins instead of one person.
Then when Obama goes out to murder some upstanding Real American the other Obama can give him an alibi.
birgerjohansson says
The lenticular things are alien spacecraft, giving support to Hillary and the Russians.
And they go Poow! Poow! shooting straight laser beams all over the diagram.
birgerjohansson says
…and the flying saucers go “Uranium One to Uranium Two” on the radio. They are like the flying thingies Skynet use to kill John Connor’s fighter.
militantagnostic says
birgerjohansson @14
Obviously – How else can you explain how he was born in Hawaii and Kenya at the same time.
whywhywhy says
The elected folks who are churning up this BS are the symptom. The issue is the electorate or as my Mom said often, “In a democracy we have the right to be wrong”. We need to fix the issue with society/voters and I am not sure if this is possible without first reining in the role of big money and corporate owned media.
TGAP Dad says
Two thoughts:
– The chart is all too reminiscent of the whacked out conspiracy nonsense Glenn Beck used to spew on his TV show. And remember: he was booted off Fox “News” for being too crazy.
– The real brain breaker is that Gohmert was at one point a federal judge, which he had to have completed undergrad and law degrees, then passed the bar. Like Ben Carson, how in the HELL does someone accomplish those things while expressing such utter stupidity? How???
Marcus Ranum says
whywhywhy@#18:
We need to fix the issue with society/voters and I am not sure if this is possible without first reining in the role of big money and corporate owned media.
If it’s big money and the media, why is it the electorate?
nathanieltagg says
I tried to start in the upper right. Is there any link between the Clinton foundation and uranium ore? I mean, one is a charity. The other is a rock.
Area Man says
@21: “I tried to start in the upper right. Is there any link between the Clinton foundation and uranium ore?”
It actually says “Uranium One”, which was the name of a Canadian company that was sold to a Russian company back in 2010, in a deal that required permission from multiple agencies, one of which Hillary Clinton ran. The guy who sold the company later donated money to the Clinton Foundation. That is the sole basis of the “scandal” that Republicans are flogging in a desperate attempt to take attention away from their president’s own crimes.
peptron says
It should be clear by now that “Obama” is the plural name refering to the collective mind of each of the Obamum.
microraptor says
TGAP Dad @19:
[quote]The chart is all too reminiscent of the whacked out conspiracy nonsense Glenn Beck used to spew on his TV show. And remember: he was booted off Fox “News” for being too crazy.[/quote]
Remember, though, that that only came about when he started attacking companies that bought advertising on FAUX.
What a Maroon, living up to the 'nym says
HappyNat @ 7,
And yet there’s only one Olsen twin.
Jado says
PZ, we are not HELPLESS. We are FECKLESS. We can’t be bothered to do what needs to be done, because it will involve arguing and loud voices.
It’s like trying to remove the local schizo from a supermarket when they have an episode – you can’t have this happening, but you don’t want to escalate the problem. So you just hope it goes away on its own.And in the event that it doesn’t rectify itself, you can always call the cops. But in this case, the cops are either related and won’t help, they are also schizo, or they are making big bank from the local corporate market that is competing with the original supermarket.
So when the cops won’t/can’t do anything, what do you do? You leave and go to the other corporate supermarket, just like they planned. Mission accomplished.
Gordon Davisson says
Area man @22:
AIUI the deal didn’t actually require permission from the committee, the approval was just advisory. From factcheck.org:
Gordon Davisson says
HappyNat @7:
Is that a line between the two Obama ovals (that goes under the Ben Rhodes diamond), or are both Obamas independently connected to Ben Rhodes? And if the lines go underneath, why is there a line from Ben Rhodes to the upper (far away) Obama (a line that goes under the Hillary Clinton diamond) rather than to the Obama he’s sitting right next to?
And why do the two lines coming off the upper right of the ROSSATOM oval need to cross each other three times at various angles before they get to their destinations at URANIUM ONE and the Clinton Foundation?
No, this chart is not like the Tokyo subway system. The Tokyo subway system is topologically sane.
What a Maroon, living up to the 'nym says
Gordon Davisson @28,
The problem is that you’re only looking at a two-dimension projection, so of course it seems confusing. If you saw it in all its 11-dimensional glory, it would make beautiful sense.
Gordon Davisson says
Maroon @ 29: Silly me, always taking such a limited viewpoint.
BTW, this seems relevant today.
Pierce R. Butler says
The wingnuts want to push the Uranium One “scandal” while simultaneously promoting the “Putin’s a good guy” theme?
How long, if ever, until one of the brilliant minds of modern corporate journalism thinks to ask about this?
KG says
Happy Nat@7,
Gohmert has revealed the awful truth: Obama conspired with himself!!!
anna says
Jado @26
1. Schizo is an extremely ableist term. Someone have a public mental health episode or someone reading your comment who has this issue doesn’t need more shame.
2. Why does something need to be done about an episode? The person is very unlikely to be a danger to anyone. Perhaps just leave them alone to work it our unless they ask for assistance.
3. Using mental health as an analogy for politics is wrong both in terms of accuracy and compassion for the mentally ill.
HappyNat says
What a Maroon @25
There used to be two. Thanks, Obama.
KG@32
I now have a new euphemism for masturbation.
Ogvorbis: Swimming without a parachute. says
HappyNat:
So, does Gohmert Hoggle himself? Or vice versa?
mostlymarvelous says
Area Man
It’s true that the guy who sold the company later donated to the Clinton Foundation, buuuut …
… he sold his shares in the company 18 months before Clinton was Sec of State, therefore even longer before the majority ownership went to the Russian crowd.
His link in the chain was broken before anyone thought there was a chain.
Lofty says
Peptron, the world is being over run with Obamae.
SenseOfTheAbsurd says
One thing I can tell you with absolute certainty, even without embiggening that mess to the point of legibility, is that whoever produced it had zero training in intelligence analysis.
WMDKitty -- Survivor says
*squints*
*puts on glasses*
*shakes head*
*removes, cleans, and replaces glasses*
*turns computer sideways*
.
.
.
.
.
What the fuck is this?