Bad Santas

If you had a crummy Christmas morning (I didn’t, so I’m just linking these as a public service), here are a few outlets.
Silly Humans finds an Evil Santa Generator — create your own nasty, scabrous, ugly Santa Claus, suitable for framing.

If you really want to know why Santa gave you such a crappy Christmas, read about the legend of El Caganer, and you will understand.

My Santa was a sweet, jolly fellow who got me a stack of books, a pound of smoked salmon, and the first season of Deadwood on DVD, so I’m going to enjoy a profane, cynical, bloody Western after I get the Christmas feast cooking slowly in the oven.


  1. TomMil says

    My 8 year old son asked me last night, “Daddy, why does Santa give rich kids more presents than poor ones? Don’t the poor kids need more than the rich ones?” I said, “Well son, it’s because Santa is a dick!” Okay, I didn’t really say that, I just said, “That’s a good question. I don’t know.” I’m guessing this is his last year hanging on to any Santa belief.

  2. Shawn S. says

    TomMil, you need to read Tom Flynn’s The Trouble With Christmas. He addresses that very issue. There is a great Skepticality interview with him, and he was recently interviewed on the Point of Inquiry Podcast.

    I think I’ll listen to it while my relatives celebrate xmas in the other room.

    I’ve spent most of today reading atheist articles or journal articles on NCBI relating to my favorite bacteria, Coxiella burnetii.

    Happy Festivus.

  3. CortxVortx says

    My lovely wife allowed me to purchase the entire five seasons AND the movie collection of “Babylon 5.” (It was half-price on Amazon). I must’ve been REALLY good this year!

    A very merry Yule to y’all!

  4. bernarda says

    Does Santa sometimes lie?

    “Green frogs are only one deceptive species among many. Dishonesty has been documented in creatures ranging from birds to crustaceans to primates, including, of course, Homo sapiens. “When you think of human communication, it’s rife with deception,” said Stephen Nowicki, a biologist at Duke University and the co-author of the 2005 book “The Evolution of Animal Communication.” “You just need to read a Shakespeare play or two to see that.”

    As Dr. Nowicki chronicled in his book, biologists have long puzzled over deception. Dishonesty should undermine trust between animals. Why, for example, do green frogs keep believing that a big croak means a big male? New research is offering some answers: Natural selection can favor a mix of truth and lies, particularly when an animal has a big audience. From one listener to the next, honesty may not be the best policy.”

  5. says

    Deadwood season 1 DVD. Damn. I didn’t even think about that.

    I’ll still never understand why they canceled that show (well there will be an HBO movie “event” but no more weekly shows).

  6. says

    I got a lot of cooking supplies for Decemberween, some science and philosophy magazines, and a few gizmos and trinkets. Now I have to get to Chinatown in all this white to complement what I got …

    Actually, anyone have a good recipe to use chili mayonaise?