Unconstitutional Chaplains

If you haven’t yet, watch this video, courtesy of Chris Rodda. Then, forgive me for re-posting this verse. It’s just that it’s all too appropriate, once again.

The chaplains are ready to answer the call
In the guise of supporting our fitness
To breach and dismantle the church-and-state wall
And to act as a born-again witness

And the Head of the chaplains will smile and nod,
For God and for country (but mostly for God)

To protect and defend, you remember the oath,
So there’s no use in getting indignant
But I think I’ve detected a spiritual growth
And I’m worried it might be malignant

A chaplain, who shepherds the men in his squad
For God and for country (but mostly for God)

There’s no cause for worry, no need for alarm
It’s only the damn constitution
And the chaplain, who’s keeping your soul safe from harm
Is the problem, and not the solution

But they’ve been there so long it no longer seems odd
For God and for country (but mostly for God)

The problem is growing, of that there’s no doubt
And the bible does not hold the answer
The simple solution—you cut it right out
Cos that’s what you do with a cancer

It’s a cult, once you see past the shiny façade
For God and for country (but mostly for God)


  1. Die Anyway says

    A snippet from the life of Die Anyway —
    In 1969 I got my draft notice. I was two classes shy of my BS in Biology so could not be an officer, and rather than be a ground-pounder I opted to join the Air Force. The USAF had divided all enlisted jobs into 3 major categories; administrative, mechanical and general. When you signed up, you chose which category you wanted. I chose administrative. On one of the early days in our bootcamp training we were taken to a room and told we would pick our military career. On the chalk board were the names of all of the jobs available that week for each category. It didn’t matter if you had your heart set on X or were the best person in the world in Y, if they didn’t need X and Y this week, well you picked from the list that they did need. The job that I wanted, and that the recruiter told me was available in Administrative, was not on the board. So I scanned the list, a very short list, for something I wanted to spend the next 4 years doing. I quickly picked my first choice as Pharmacy Clerk. Second choice I don’t recall but something rather bland. That didn’t leave much for 3rd choice but I finally settled on Chaplain’s Assistant. At this point in my life I was already an atheist but of the remaining jobs on the list, that seemed to be the best choice. As it turned out, I didn’t get any of my three choices. The Air Force decided that I could better serve my country as an Albanian linguist. (Don’t ask.) In any case, I’ve always wondered what it would have been like for an atheist to serve as a Chaplain’s Assistant?

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