Another Christmas miracle

Drop everything! A couple in Arizona have spotted a cross on their cheesecake, so obviously it’s A Message.

A suburban Phoenix family says their Christmas cheesecake sent them the message of a holiday miracle.

The Arizona Republic reports that when the family in Scottsdale, Ariz., pulled their dessert out of the oven, it cracked as it cooled and formed a crucifix.

The family members, who have not given their names publicly, say the crucifix is a message.

They say they won’t be eating the cheesecake. Instead, they plan to sell it and donate the money to a local charity or church.

But that’s the end of the story. They forgot something. What’s the message?

It could be that the family that pulled their dessert out of the oven doesn’t know how to make a cheesecake.

But anyway, whatever it is, you would think that’s part of the story. Strange that they didn’t tell us.

Shall we try to guess?

It’s cold here?

Cut me a slice?

Go to church?

I’m vegan?

Put some berries on top?


I died for your sins and now I’m doing guest spots on cheesecakes?

Does this make my butt look big?

Wait, there’s been a mixup, I’m Mohammed?

H/t Leonie Hilliard.


  1. Al Dente says

    It not only formed a cross but each of the four members of the family got their own piece of cheesecake. Wotan be praised!

  2. Cassidy McJones says

    Cheesecake is DIVINE whether it displays a cross or not. I don’t care if has a pulsating picture of Satan on it. DIVINE I says.

  3. says

    That’s not a crucifix; it doesn’t have a divine corpse hanging on it. It’s just a cross. (Seriously: that’s a Catholic/Protestant divide thing. The former represents the Suffering Christ, while the latter — the empty cross — represents the Resurrection. Proving that Protestantism is totes better than Papishism. Or so I was taught.)

  4. Cuttlefish says

    I was just remembering today, I made a cheesecake to bring to meet friends in Princeton once… met at a coffee shop, and asked the owner to use plates and forks. He protested a bit, understandably, that we would want to use his plates and forks without buying his food, but I gave him a piece of cheesecake, and instead he gave us the plates and forks and offered me a job baking for him.

    Damn right I can bake a cheesecake. And it doesn’t need a cross in it to work miracles.

  5. Al Dente says

    Jesus is getting really lazy. Instead of his face in the cheesecake, he’s just stuck a poorly drawn (or split) cross in it.

  6. UnknownEric the Apostate says

    Yeah, I think that part was in the lost Gospel of Bob. “And Jesus spake, ‘In approximately 2000 years or so, I shall return as a heavenly cheesecake which may not save your soul, but will fill your belly.'”

  7. peterh says

    “…It’s just a cross…. that’s a Catholic/Protestant divide thing. ”

    Firesign Theatre says it’s a symbol of quartering the universe into active and passive principles.

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