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Hey Marco, how old is the earth?

Marco Rubio has a problem and it’s not that he can’t look up the age of the earth on the Internet or ask a geologist. Rubio’s problem is also Christie’s problem and Jindal’s problem:  he’s not allowed to say what the answer is because he’s in a party beholden to knuckle-dragging fundamentalists from the 18th century:

GQ — I’m not a scientist, man. I can tell you what recorded history says, I can tell you what the Bible says, but I think that’s a dispute amongst theologians and I think it has nothing to do with the gross domestic product or economic growth of the United States. I think the age of the universe has zero to do with how our economy is going to grow. I’m not a scientist. I don’t think I’m qualified to answer a question like that. At the end of the day, I think there are multiple theories out there on how the universe was created and I think this is a country where people should have the opportunity to teach them all. I think parents should be able to teach their kids what their faith says, what science says. Whether the Earth was created in 7 days, or 7 actual eras, I’m not sure we’ll ever be able to answer that. It’s one of the great mysteries.

Hahaha! He contradicts himself: He’s not a historian but he can tell you what recorded history says, he’s not a scientists so he can’t tell you what a science says. It’s dishonest and inconsistent on so many levels, high cartoon comedy. Rubio now looks like a complete pandering idiot to the very same swing voters conservatives are hoping to woo wearing sell outs like Rubio as a disguise.

And yes I know most people don’t care about the age of the earth. The problem is people who can be so easily deceived about simple research like that are also prime marks for hare-brained conspiracies and nutty ideas of womens’ pseudo-phsyiologies pawned by grifters of every stripe. You know, the Republican Party, and no matter how lucrative the conservative entertainment complex may be, we saw how well it works as an electoral strategy. Apparently the lesson the GOP learned when “lie your ass off to grumpy old white people” didn’t work was “let’s try lying our asses off to younger, browner people!”.

Comments

  1. says

    “knuckle-dragging fundamentalists from the 18th century”

    No! No! No!
    That was the Age of Reason (or so they said at the time): now if you’d said knuckle-dragging fundamentalists from the early-to-mid-17th century I’d be right there with you

  2. schmeer says

    So richardelguru, you’re saying “If there were rationalists why were there still knuckle dragging fundamentalists”?

  3. blf says

    This seems more in keeping with the 17th/18th century BCE, except that is before the Earth was created…

  4. freebird says

    Welp, the Earth was created in 7 days, or 7 eras. Doesn’t really matter. I just know it has to be 7 somethings, and definitely not 6 or 8 somethings.

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