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Mar 14 2012

People are wondering why Gingrich doesn’t quit?

After Santorum’s frothy surge in last night’s primaries, the talk of tradmed town inevitably turned to Newt. He’s losing right and left, both metaphorically and literally, he’s being dragged through the mud viciously by Romney’s Borg, he can’t even win the neoconfederate regions that spawned him. Santorum, yes Rick Santorum, has beaten Gingrich in 20 of the last 24 states, and by staying in Gingrich virtually assures Romney, a man he clearly despises, the nomination. “Why stay in” they’re all asking? To answer that you simply need to understand what it is Newt Gingrich does for a living.

Gingrich travels the globe giving highly lucrative speeches, the beauty being he is paid to speak not just about his own personal greatness, but his own products, mostly a line of over-priced ghost-written books or outsourced DVDs proclaiming the greatness of Newt Gingrich. There a lot of former conservative lawmakers turned grifters bilking the faithful, but no one does it like this clown. He’s a one man vertically integrated conservative grifting machine Inc,, even wife number three, Callista, gets in on the act. Can you blame her for wanting to be by his side 24/7 after what happened to the former Mrs. Gingrich and the former-former Mrs. Gingrich?

This is what he does all the time. It’s not just a job, its his life. In off election years or on election years, in years when he’s running and year’s when he’s not, in years when he pretends to run and years when he doesn’t bother even with that pretense. The only difference about this year, from the perspective of Newt and his financial advisers anyway, is the crowds are bigger, the applause lines louder, and his sales are booming like never before. Best of all, there’s no pesky over head like there usually is. Small donors and one zillionaire whale contributor are paying for it all.

Newt Gingrich is not just going to keep it up until 2012 contributions dry up or the nominee is chosen. He’s going to keep doing this through the Spring, Summer, and Fall, after the election and right through 2013 and beyond. He’ll keep doing it for as long as it pays, until he drops dead, or until he can get paid better in some fashion to stop doing it.

And the brilliant DC talking heads are puzzled by why he won’t quit?

14 comments

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  1. 1
    StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    Good for him. Keep it going Newt and best of luck.

    I want my Moon base durnnit!

  2. 2
    'Tis Himself

    …even wife number three, Callista, gets in on the act. Can you blame her for wanting to be by his side 24/7 after what happened to the former Mrs. Gingrich and the former-former Mrs. Gingrich?

    I strongly suspect the reason why Gingrich has been married three times is that none of his wives, including the present one, love him as much as he loves himself.

  3. 3
    Kevin, Youhao Huo Mao

    I saw a quote in the paper today, basically “why leave it up to two guys who can’t win.”

    Earth to Newt – you can’t win, either! Ever!

  4. 4
    Jeff Engel

    So… Why do his contributors keep contributing?

  5. 5
    davidct

    As long as Newt keeps this up he is a somebody. There are always new contacts to be made and side deals for fun and profit. For someone so totally sold on himself stepping out of the limelight for the good of some greater cause is not an option.

  6. 6
    Reginald Selkirk

    Newt says:

    “I want to be the candidate of science and technology,”

    2006 Discover Magazine interview of Newt

    Where do you come down on teaching intelligent design in schools? Do you think the ruling in the Dover, Pennsylvania, case was appropriate?
    I believe evolution should be taught as science, and intelligent design should be taught as philosophy. Francis Collins’s new book, The Language of God, is a fine statement that combines a belief in God with a belief in evolution. I do not know enough about the Dover case to critique the judge’s decision, but I am generally cautious about unelected judges establishing community standards—that is the duty of elected officials.

    Dear asshole: my constitutional right not to have someone else’s religion forced on me by dishonestly labelling it either science or philosophy and having it taught in the public schools should not be superceded by “community standards.”

  7. 7
    jerthebarbarian

    Best of all, there’s no pesky over head like there usually is. Small donors and one zillionaire whale contributor are paying for it all.

    I agree with you overall, but this one bit really nails the question that the chattering classes SHOULD be asking. Why is that one zillionaire contributor paying to keep Newt afloat at this point? Newt would quit if his cash flow were cut off – so what’s keeping the cash flow running?

    OM @2:

    …none of his wives, including the present one, love him as much as he loves himself.

    To be fair to his wives, I don’t think it’s actually humanly possible for anyone to love Newt as much as Newt loves himself.

  8. 8
    danielwatkins

    If the GOP wanted him out he would be, he’s not that much of a lone wolf. He has however proven himself useful in standing in he way of Santorum. Romney can track toward the center in the general election, Santorum is stuck in far right field and won’t attract nearly as many independents. I don’t think either is a compleat picture, it’s all just watercolors in Romneys march, ER, stumble to the convention.

  9. 9
    Stephen "DarkSyde" Andrew

    Good point Daniel. Thing is, I’m not sure what “The GOP” means right now. The down side about the info age is it makes pulling the wool over conservative eyes tougher. A lot of these teaparty candidates for example are calling out the classic GOP for not acting on abortion, or cutting taxes to zero, that kinda stuff.

  10. 10
    Neil Rickert

    Stay in there, Newt. This is great street theater.

  11. 11
    gshelley

    I think people are confusing Newt with someone who, despite being socially conservative is a man of integrity.
    I think that there is a second point to why he will keep going as long as possible. It isn’t just that it is good for his career, it is that despite how much he despises Romney, he doesn’t like Santorum all that much more. Why would he step aside for Santorum?

  12. 12
    scott

    #7- What’s keeping Newt’s cash flow running is that his whale hates Santorum and likes Romney almost as much as he does Newt. Keeping Newt in the race is his most cost-effective way of keeping Santorum down.

  13. 13
    jerthebarbarian

    scott @12

    Keeping Newt in the race is his most cost-effective way of keeping Santorum down.

    Yeah I kinda wondered about that – if Newt was being used to try to draw votes away from Santorum. That’s the most logical reason I suppose – handing more money over to Mitt wouldn’t make much difference at this stage.

  14. 14
    Pierce R. Butler

    Adelson, the Las Vegas casino mogul paying Gingrich’s tab, also seems to enjoy having a voice crying odes to B. Netanyahu & his nonstop belligerence all over the country (a position coincidentally adopted by NG sometime last year, it seems).

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