Episode CCCXXXII: Iceland!


Here’s a promotional video for this place I’m at. One thing: it mentions the midnight sun. This is not a plus. It’s 2am here right now, and it’s still light out. It’s not making it easy to sleep.

(Episode CCCXXXI: Working on the tone.)

Comments

  1. says

    Oh hai I missed where Jadehawk and Sili already talked about DJ and I just saw it and I am so late.

    well actually, I was commenting on his comment on Token Skeptic. I didn’t know he went and shat all over Stephanie’s blog, too, while at it.

    I’d drown my frustration, but I actually run out of beer and wine and forgot to buy more (I will never get used to there not being potable alcohol in the grocery store).

  2. Hekuni Cat, MQG says

    Koshka, I’m so sorry. I truly wish there was something I could do apart from offering virtual hugs.

  3. says

    Ms. Daisy – I wondered what you would do with the trout last week! :) But I confess, that linguine recipe sounds divine and I know just the man who would love to make it for me! – I will pass it along to Mr Nifty! :D

  4. says

    Jeez, I didn’t realize how big a pile-up this has become. DJG is frantically digging himself in deeper at Zvan’s, Kylie just quotes his rubbish uncritically, and now Greg L has jumped on it. It never stops, does it. I’m off to buy kids’ toys today.

  5. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Gah, my German is lying on its back with its feet in the air, dead still. But then it’s been 35+ years.

  6. Desert Son, OM says

    Gregory Greenwood,

    Thanks for the alert. I’ll be sending the developer a note on why they won’t be getting my money.

    Still learning,

    Robert

  7. carlie says

    Thanks, Chigau.

    wow, Jadehawk, I didn’t realize he was doing it in other places, too.

  8. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    I’ve done little to celebrate getting into my top-choice law school except have dinner with my best friend. So even though I can count on one finger the times in my life I’ve had alcohol without anyone else present, I bought some wine tonight and opened a bottle.

    Avocado, fresh herb mix, baby greens, sauteed onion and mushroom; all with sesame-ginger vinaigrette.

    Truly wonderful olive oil home-steeped with garlic spread over seeded garlic bread

    A nice cote-du rhone

    my doggy

    and good thoughts of what this summer and fall will bring.

    I’m happy.

  9. Esteleth, Raging Dyke of Fuck Mountain says

    Dashing in to wave hello and to say that I’ll be in Toronto friday.

    People thereabouts who are up for Stuff™ can say so?

    Also, I accidentally stuck my hand into liquid nitrogen today. Blisters. \o/

  10. Esteleth, Raging Dyke of Fuck Mountain says

    *confetti* *kittens* *hugs* *parade* for Crip Dyke!

  11. Happiestsadist says

    Esteleth! I happen to be in Toronto! I’d love to meet up if you’re so inclined.

  12. Esteleth, Raging Dyke of Fuck Mountain says

    Hoorays, Happiestsadist! Email me! Esteleth at gmail! We can coordinate.

  13. NuMad says

    Congrats (and yums) Crip Dyke!

    PZ,

    It’s 2am here right now, and it’s still light out. It’s not making it easy to sleep.

    Welcome to my world, Daywalker!

  14. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    I just bought some Bowen Island Breweries “Blond Hemp Ale”.
    Why does it even contain ‘hemp’ at all? Is there a reason?

    “I just bought some Bowen Island Breweries “Blond Hemp Ale”.”

    hopheads who will buy literally anything if it has a pot-leaf emblazoned on it

    “I just bought some Bowen Island Breweries “Blond Hemp Ale”.”

    What? I bought it for research purposes. It tastes OK, and is inexpensive, and I just wanted to see what the ‘hemp’ angle is all about.

  15. Koshka says

    I have just got back from having coffee with my upset partner.

    Before the evil christian woman mentioned the praying, my partner told her that she was being inappropriate.

    And THEN she proceeded to mention about wanting to pray for her.

    So this arse deliberately brought up praying even though she knew her opinion was not wanted.

    No doubt she has gone away thinking she is doing ‘god’s work’ whilst my partner is extremely upset. I am fucking furious. And the longer term problem of this behaviour is that we often do not leave the house because we are concerned that someone will upset us.

    Again thanks everyone who has replied. I wish more people could speak to me as you have.

  16. says

    Crip Dyke, congratulations, and cracking a good côte du rhone to have with a dish (that would sound mouth-watering just from a mere recitation of its ingredients) sounds like a marvellous way of celebrating. (And I’ve also really appreciated your comments over yonder on a blog… you probably know whereof I speak. So thank you for that as well.)

  17. Koshka says

    And while I am ranting,

    At the coffee shop, they have a sign in the men’s toilet that reads “Please DO NOT place nappies in the rubbish bins. A nappy bin is available in the Ladies Toilet of this building for your disposal convenience. Thank you.”

    Either they think it is acceptable that men go into the women’s toilet or they think men shouldn’t change nappies as it is a woman’s job. And to compound it there are 2 nappy bins in the women’s toilet!

    Sorry for the mostly pointless rant – It helps to settle my anger.

  18. says

    So, I decided to dip my toe into LUSH products since I’ve heard so many people praise them when I mention that I’m a soap snob addict enthusiast. Jebus crimbo, I had to go through their entire list of “soaps” to find two that didn’t contain sodium lauryl sulfate. No, I don’t think it’s going to give me Teh Cancers, but I’ll be damned if I pay those prices for cheap detergent.

    Then, a friend who heard I was interested sent me a chunk of Figs and Leaves, one of LUSH’s two soaps that don’t contain sls. Okay, fine, smells nice, haven’t had a chance to use it yet and see if it’s drying, but I was bowled over when I saw the price tag on the small piece of soap she sent — over $10! Puh-lease. I’ve never paid that much for a bar of soap in my life and I’ve used some excellent soap. This stuff better erase cellulite and cure cancer at the same time, man.

  19. says

    Talk about cheap drinks. My leisurely afternoon of writing and drinking 5 Corona and a couple Jameson by the river yesterday incurred a bill of 120.- USD. Not amused.

  20. says

    Wow CripDyke, my heart just warmed a little, thinking of you at home with your celebratory dinner and libations. Congratulations! Best of luck in law school. I can’t wait to hear about how it goes.

    To Koshka–I’m so sorry. Truly there are some awful people out there. My heart is breaking a little bit for you.

    So, here I am, warmed and a bit broken. The usual for TET.

    I found a 5K race I want to do. It’s in about 6 weeks. I’m already running that distance pretty comfortably, it’s just a question of getting my speed up. This will be my first real race! It will be interesting to see how running with others affects my time. Oh, and it’s a race in celebration of women runners. That seemed like a great way to officially enter into the word of Running™. Since up til now I’ve only ever run by myself, for the heck of it.

  21. cicely. Just cicely. says

    I also pick up pennies. ‘Cause you never know when you may need a sock half-full of something, for…some reason.

    If we got rid of pennies, everything would be rounded up to the next nickel—never down. And The Sock is always hungry.

    Bill Dauphin, congradulations to your graduate. *congradufetti*

    *extra gentle hug* for happiestsadist. And I hope you find a new (and more helpful) doctor soon.

    Koshka, I don’t “know” you (at least by that ‘nym), but if you accept hugs from sympathetic strangers, then *hugs*, and a complete absence of prayers. I serve up my well-wishes neat.

    The woman at the shopping center…aside from the uselessness of prayer, there’s no need to ask for permission unless she wants you to know what A Good Person she is. I mean, she could have just prayed in her closet, right?

    ADMIRE ME!

    *celebration with all the trimmings* for Crip Dyke.
    -

  22. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Whoops –

    I posted last week and got happies then. Was mentioning exciting law school news more for the context of explaining the unusual drinking alone than anything else.

    But yes, it is wonderful. It’s the top public law school in Canada. If I’m going to switch careers after turning 40, I’d like to have the head start of a prestigious school to boost me along.

    Then there’s the fact that my partner *works* at the school, one building over from the law school so that we can have lunches the whole time I’m going to school there. And I can use her employee tuition credits. And, well, it makes it possible for me to live in a foreign country on a student visa until we can do something that celebrates us and gets me more permanent status (which, I hear, is legal in that pervert-haven CanadiaLand) at the same time.

    Plus, there’s just the fact that if I went to Berkeley or UW or Northwestern I would be across a border from Ms Cripdyke for 3 whole years – so the alternatives weren’t so hot.

    So, yeah. Getting in to this specific school is absolutely amazing. A bottle of wine is the least I deserve. Unfortunately Ms Cripdyke and the kids had to go back to Canada after the solar eclipse, 2 days before I got the official news. She visits again in 10 days and I’m sure that there will be other revelry then.

  23. katkinkate says

    PZ you need a sleeping mask. You could probably buy one, but it would be easy to make one out of a scarf or a tie (or a shirt, pillowcase, clean pair of undies, handtowel …)

  24. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Lynna – I think I forgot to say get well and that i’m wishing you the return of whatever you need to be you.

    Koshka – I’m caught up on the last thread and I’ve heard both what happened and that you have had a chance to spend time with your partner and child.

    I think it’s absolutely horrifying to lose a child. I really can’t imagine it. I’m so sorry and hope you and your family are doing reasonably well. I hope your child’s health steadily improves. And I hope that f*wits stop using your difficulties to make themselves feel better at your expense. The horde will always be here for you.

    Caine – thanks for the encouragement/orders. I got more done that I thought I would this afternoon. Not done with everything on the current to do list, but made a dent more than significant enough for this week. Well, at least until friday.

    Also, wanted to tell you how much I love Punk Duck and Robot Duck. Speaking of the latter, the first time I heard Daft Punk’s Robot Rock I thought that they were saying, “Robot Duck.”

    Thus: Daft Punk Robot Duck. I wanna see that one!

  25. soul_biscuit says

    Hi everybody.

    I’m a little late introducing myself, I think. I’ve been reading Pharyngula for four years, after all, and I’ve always enjoyed reading your posts. But recent events at FtB kind of forced my hand. I don’t want to make much of it because you guys are already done talking about it, but I’ll just say: Josh, Ms. Daisy Cutter, and Happiestsadist, I’d be a lot stupider (and less aware of my privileged viewpoints) if it weren’t for you.

    That goes for just about everybody else too, of course, but I’m sure you will understand why I might single out those three.

    So yeah. Congrats, Crip Dyke! I only managed to get into my bottom-choice law school, but considering how naively optimistic I was with my applications, that’s not a bad thing. If I were thinking more clearly, though, maybe I would have applied to Canadian law schools instead, and there wouldn’t be a national boundary between me and my fiance.

    I don’t have words, Koshka.

    Anyway, I’ve threadrupted enough!

  26. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Welcome soul_biscuit!!

    If you’d like to get rid of the underscore, that dark gray band at the top of the page when you’re logged in will allow you to manage your profile, including allowing a display name different from your login name without all the rules against spaces, etc.

    So you’re in a US law school? In the NW? NE? I’m not in the NE too often, but I get there.

    Yeah, having a boundary between you & the person you love kinda sucks. On the other hand, it means that when you get togther you HAVE to prioritize each other. When we have a weekend without the kids, we’re in each other’s arms half the waking day. That’s just not sustainable when we’re living together and the kids are underfoot and there are chores to be done, etc. etc.

    Not that I’m complaining I’ll be on the same side of the border with her, no! Just that…it changes things. And not every change is good even if as a whole the negatives don’t hold a candle to the positives.

    Anyway, this is meant to commiserate, I guess. I have another month (at least, move depends on my organizational skills which aren’t always the greatest) of separation, but if I had to commit to another 3 years across the border I’d be darn sad.

    Have you figured out whether you’ll be moving up or your fiance will be moving down?

    welcome again. I’m sure lots and lots of people will be telling you how glad we are you’re here.

  27. Desert Son, OM says

    Crip Dyke, congratulations!

    Also to SallyStrange on finding a race!

    It will be interesting to see how running with others affects my time.

    In my case, I gained a full minute on my mile time. My typical mile is about 11.5 minutes (I am not a speedy runner), but when I ran the five-mile Turkey Trot past November I clocked an average of 10.25 minute mile for the course.

    I found it thrilling to run with approx. 20,000 other people, and also distracting to stay on my pace when the mass of people is shifting around me. It was tempting to really increase speed at times, and in the end gained that minute. Also, as the end of the race came in sight it was a psychological thrill and I definitely increased pace for the finish line.

    Another cool thing was the sound of all those shoes striking asphalt (this run was an urban setting). It’s a cool experience to run with a bunch of other runners!

    Good luck with the training and the run!

    Still learning,

    Robert

  28. Koshka says

    cicely,

    Your virtual hug is appreciated – thank you. I am familiar with your postings so this does mean something.

    I have been an occasional poster for the last 2 years. I don’t know if I have ever commented on TET before. I have trouble making new friends – largely because of my recent history. I am only just starting to feel comfortable posting on TET now.

    Crip Dyke,

    Lucy is healthy. She is a beautiful happy child. She is only really on oxygen because Jordi died of SIDS. I don’t expect her to have any problems – but I am shit-scared that I will wake up and she will be dead as Jordi was also perfectly healthy. I do feel very lucky now as we desperately wanted another child (partially to replace to Jordi). We are doing well (hey people are always telling us “Gosh you are doing well!” Our fridge is full of “You’re doing well!” certificates) and we are genuinely happy punctuated with periods of intense (but lessening) grief.

  29. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Haha, JT deleted my post.

    We know what that means.

  30. Koshka says

    soul_biscuit,

    Yes this is a great place. The regular posters are amazing and I often don’t post because they say what I want to say and then some.

    I am like you in that I lurked a lot before I commented. And this is why I appreciate it when they tackle the trolls. They don’t feed the trolls – they feed the lurkers.

  31. says

    Robert, this run will not have 20,000 people. And it’ll be in the rolling hills of the Finger Lakes region of upstate NY.

    It’ll still be competitive for me, though. I’m not a very fast runner myself, but I do have a competitive spirit. I just know that it will make me push myself harder.

    Thanks for the good wishes!

  32. Aquaria says

    It’s 2am here right now, and it’s still light out. It’s not making it easy to sleep.

    Try having to sleep every single day at 2 p.m. and get back to me.

    I did that for about 10 of the 15 years I worked for the USPS. I rarely had a choice about it.

    It was murder when my son was in the public day care centers known as school. I would tell my son’s teachers–DO NOT CALL ME BETWEEN 9 AM AND 3 PM unless my son is bleeding, dying or has set the school on fire. I need to sleep some time. but they didn’t care.

    Don’t worry. I fixed them. Called them at home during the dead of night for weeks. 12.30, 3 a.m, 2 a.m.–I’m up all night, and have a break every hour. Let’s rumble.

    Funny… They stopped calling me over bullshit like how my son’s backpack was filled (no, I’m not kidding), or that he was reading Herman Hesse in 4th grade (still not kidding).

    Only in Texas would teachers freak out about a 4th grader being better-read than they are.

  33. John Morales says

    TLC,

    Haha, JT deleted my post.

    I am curious.

    With what degree of transparency, and are you now banned?

    (Is it possible to link to the event?)

  34. says

    Crip Dyke:

    Also, wanted to tell you how much I love Punk Duck and Robot Duck. Speaking of the latter, the first time I heard Daft Punk’s Robot Rock I thought that they were saying, “Robot Duck.”

    Thus: Daft Punk Robot Duck. I wanna see that one!

    Aaaw, thank you. ♥ It would be easy enough to do a Daft Punk Robot Duckie, however, I have my hands absolutely full with projects as of now, including being terribly behind with The Darkheart Duckie Project. Oy. Remind me late in the year though, or possibly next Spring. I might be able to do up a li’l surprise for ya. :D

  35. Koshka says

    I remember camping in northern Norway in the middle of summer. I went to sleep reasonably early and woke up the next morning at 11.30. I had a ferry to catch just after midday and started to panic. Then I realised it was actually 11.30 in the evening and the light had simply confused me.

  36. says

    You should go out at night and enjoy midnight sun. If you badly need sleep, you should sleep in a room that uses thick black curtains to stop any light showing through windows. Please don’t say that I sound like a grandmother! I care for you.

  37. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    John Morales and Sallystrange:

    this post: http://freethoughtblogs.com/wwjtd/2012/05/30/taking-a-moment-to-think-of-the-work-we-do/#comment-64844

    I’m very drunk. My golden retriever is in a lot of pain today and the only way to deal with the pain of seeing her in pain was to drink beer and sit with her for a little while, so bear with me.

    The first one was something about how instead of cleaning up his mess, he chooses to go all ‘lalalalalalala I’m on vacation I can’t hear you!’ and then makes a big post about what a great ally he is.

    The second (if not deleted already) is tsk tsk tsking at him for deleting my earlier post.

  38. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Update: Yeah, second post deleted.

    JT is a prolapsed shit-dribbling anus. Time for post number three.

  39. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Third update: My post is ‘awaiting moderation’. I’m sorry guys, I’m drunk and feeling silly.

  40. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Aaaw, thank you. ♥ It would be easy enough to do a Daft Punk Robot Duckie, however, I have my hands absolutely full with projects as of now, including being terribly behind with The Darkheart Duckie Project. Oy. Remind me late in the year though, or possibly next Spring. I might be able to do up a li’l surprise for ya. :D

    Welcomes. And don’t think I won’t take you up on this!
    ——

    And did I say thanks yous for all the happies upthread? Probably not, cuz I’m scatterbrained, but thanks everyone. It was extra special nice b/c I first announced getting in a week ago and got some happies then so I totes wasn’t expecting any tonight. Such a wonderful unexpected pleasure.

    There are so many things about the Horde that I love. This is just another.

  41. Evader, the parasite-infested branch on the tree of evolution. says

    I want moar pics of PZ in his furry hat.

    Is there a place that has 18 hours darkness a day? Because I look much, much better in the dark.

    Dayight highlights my obvious physical flaws, like my red hair. I never thought it was a bad thing to have red hair, but every time I walk past a group of girls lately they are talking about how ‘rangas are gross. Oh well.

    Time for a drink.

  42. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    My ‘awaiting moderation’ post:

    You’re a smug, privileged asshole, JT, and the people you claim to be ‘allied’ to aren’t as impressed as you like to think, you self aggrandizing fuckwit.

    I speak this as a guy who desperately wants to see you learn from your mistake: Stop being a jackhole.

  43. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Heya, soul_biscuit. Welcome to the shark tank, and thank you for the kind words:)

  44. John Morales says

    TLC, thank you for your effort at assuaging my curiosity.

    All I can say is … :(

    No transparency is a very bad sign.

    (To get banned is one thing, to do it silently is another, and the in-between is hardly better (though perhaps significant that you are having an effect))

  45. John Morales says

    Needless to say, I regard this as a test of character for JC.

    (Being wrong is one thing, but there are others)

  46. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    John Morales: Us (metaphorical) midsize canids, IE coyotes, do not have powerful limbs or rending claws or particularly powerful jaws. We only have boldness and endurance.

    But post number the third is my last until his next trainwreck, coyote’s honor. I’m even gonna close the tab as a sign of good faith! See? See?

  47. d(thunk) over d(MQ) = SQRRAWK! says

    TLC:

    Gah. Gah. GAAAAH! Why didn’t I know that before, when I was praising him at FTF. *makes a note of that*.

    What a shame.

    Koshka. Horrible.

    soul_biscuit: Hello! *hugses*. Welcome to the horde.

    I’m also quite threadrupt.

  48. John Morales says

    [grr]

    JT.

    (I am a functional hypocrite; how often have I noted that preview is one’s friend? :| )

    As a redundant aside, I note that I know which I’d rather have as a friend — and it ain’t JC.

  49. d(thunk) over d(MQ) = SQRRAWK! says

    I will now find somebody else to squee over. TLC? You okay?

  50. John Morales says

    TLC, if I’ve never told you before, I totally ♥ your honesty.

    (tm never repudiated my claims that he was my sifu)

  51. d(thunk) over d(MQ) = SQRRAWK! says

    Yes; I honestly think JT has gotten a bit hung up over what he considers apropos to any given topic. He seems to be neglecting the fact that conversations carry over, and that you can’t whitewash the shit you’ve done by saying “Hey, let’s talk about how great I am now and forget all this”.

  52. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    John Morales, I love the way you make me think about shit.

  53. d(thunk) over d(MQ) = SQRRAWK! says

    Everybody:

    I love the way you make me think about shit.

    QFFT.

  54. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    d(thunk): I assume you’re referring to the dog situation?

    Mika is 13 or 14 (my sense of time is not exactly that much fuzzier than hers). She has lived a life full of affection, treats, long hikes, and camping trips. She now has cancer in the left forearm. If she was a young dog, they’d amputate.

    She’s still happy being alive, and I do my best not to mourn a dog who’s still with us, but it’s just knowing that there might be a time coming up when we have to make a painful decision that kills me.

    But… perspective. Everything dies. What’s important is that they LIVED, even if only for a while.

    But no good dog ever lives as long as it deserves to.

  55. d(thunk) over d(MQ) = SQRRAWK! says

    TLC: Whoops. Not what I had in mind. It’s JT that I was complaining about. But thanks anyway. *typing fail, it’s late*.

  56. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    thunk: Oh, in regards to the JT situation… yeah, I’m OK. I’m just a a guy who wants to be an ally… I have the privilege of not being personally hurt so much by his nonsense, though it makes me very angry on behalf of my friends whom he insults with his pathetic faux-alliance.

    My drunken sadness tonight is entirely due to my old Golden Retriever. It is a true sadness, but an unavoidable one for anyone who loves anything else that’s alive… everything dies.

    But she’s still around even if getting a bit worse… it’s our (my family’s) job to make her happy and comfortable as she reaches the clearing at the end of the path.

  57. John Morales says

    [meta + sympathy + TMI]

    TLC, earlier this year, I visited a widowed friend of mine.

    She was looking after her daughter’s dog (long, irrelevant but very sad story) and I, to my regret, visited after an absence of three or so months.

    The dog (“Voodoo”, a Rhodesian Ridgeback) was skeletal and utterly listless (if good-natured as ever. I write this with literal tears). Very evidently in pain.

    Skeletal — I don’t use this word lightly. He was O so very magnificent a specimen of what a Ridgeback should be.

    I could hardly believe he remained alive.

    (Tumor)

    Then and there, I went and spent most of an hour with Voodoo and I cried and I loved him.

    Then I had a not-so-long conversation with my friend.

    Then (country town) I bought a carton of beer as payment and rang local acquaintances, having first had a conversation with my very good friend the widow and at her specific informed request, and organised for Voodoo to be shot and buried.

    Fuck.

    (Perhaps I’m an asshole, but of that I am proud)

  58. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    John Morales: They say that an old dog will tell you when it’s time for the pink needle… they’ll give you an obvious indication that the quality of life no longer outweighs the pain.

    Mika hasn’t given us that indication yet. YET. I hate seeing it as a possibility on the horizon, though.

    Back on the farm I used to work on, for the idiot Hanif who didn’t care about his animals at all, there was a german shepherdy looking mongrel with piercing orangish eyes. He was kept in a little cage and barked and growled at everyone.

    Every day I’d throw my lunch crusts over that fence, and one day he stopped barking.

    He was such a loyal old dog, but at 10, my time with him was short. We never found his body. He just ‘disappeared’ one day as old wild dogs are known to do.

  59. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Sallystrange: I don’t get it. Care to explain for the drunk?

  60. says

    Morales has been JAQing off. It’s not pretty. He JAQed off so thoroughly that a long, detailed response to his cluelessness by Daniel Fincke has become an entire new guest post over at Ophelia’s. Go and read the thread I linked to; you’ll see what I mean, Coyote.

    John Morales may be a nice guy, but he is no ally. He does not have my back, nor any other woman’s.

  61. says

    CAINE GET BACK TO STITCHING!

    Koschka, sympathies and best wishes.

    Audley, I prefer longer names that have abbreviations, so Maximilian gets my vote. Max is good. But just to be different, there’s also Macsen, from a Welsh myth – the dream of Macsen Wledig. (Who if he existed was probably really a Maximus.) Also don’t worry about mean nicknames unless they are *incredibly* obvious. Kids can be mean regardless.

    It used to be that Leslie=boy and Lesley=girl. All those -ley names were once male: Shirley, Beverley, Ashleigh etc. Most have now shifted.

    happiestsadist. Urgh. I feel your pain. Something has upset my stomach badly, so much that I couldn’t sleep last night. The usual drugs didn’t touch it. Bleargh. (Surely this can’t just be due to my asthma steroid; that’s the only change in drugs recently.)

    kristinc, yeah, LUSH is a ripoff. My preferred excessive spending on unguents and soaps these days is L’Occitane. Pricy, but their moisturisers don’t cause me to go into a rash so it’s nice to have some for a change from the boring old cetaphil. Their shea butter stuff is good.

  62. says

    Sally:

    Now I see I was wrong.

    My, my. :shakes head:

    Way to go, John – all of a sudden you don’t grok harassment and you’re indulging in JAQing. Asshat. You know, if you did that as a source of amusement, you need to be slapped with a clue by four. If this is some sort of “gee, I got it during Egate but now I really don’t grok it at all” business, then you should figure out when to shut up and listen and at least try to learn something.

  63. John Morales says

    [meta]

    SallyStrange:

    [1] John Morales may be a nice guy, but he is no ally. [2] He does not have my back, nor any other woman’s.

    1. I’ve never, ever claimed to be an ally.

    2. Yes, I do, when I think you or any other person is hard-done-by. I will criticise that which I find worthy of criticism, whether it be addressed to a troll or to a friend.

    Even if that criticism is about the unwarranted imputation of beliefs and motives for a particular behaviour.

    (You seek favouritism, you will be disappointed, as I am disappointed when I exhibit such)

  64. John Morales says

    Caine, what it was was a total fuck-up, and yes it’s my mess.

    I will have to live with it.

    (I know!)

  65. says

    Yes, I do, when I think you or any other person is hard-done-by.

    It’s nice that you think that.

    Here’s the thing:

    I don’t trust you. I don’t believe you.

    Your having my back is entirely contingent on whether you can empathize with my feeling of having been wronged, and you suck at empathizing.

    If you care about being believed, if you care about being trusted, then you’ll fix your behavior.

    Based on past experiences, I don’t think you will. And you’ll have a nice, rational-sounding, skepticky* reason for why you don’t need to.

    *skepticky : skeptical :: truthiness : truth

  66. says

    Alethea:

    CAINE GET BACK TO STITCHING!

    I’m about to do that now, thank you! :)

    About Max – it’s a good name. I have this old baby name book, What to name the baby by Evelyn Wells, from 1946. It’s wonderfully comprehensive. It lists Macsen* (as the Welsh variant) under Maximilian, along with Maximus (Latin), Maxime (French), Massamo (Italian) and Makimus (Polish).

    As for Maxine, I prefer Maxime (French) or Maxa (German). Of course, I’m not the one having a kid.

    *I love Macsen, out of all the Max names, it’s my fave.

  67. says

    John:

    You seek favouritism

    I’m letting you know this as a favour: this is one of those times to shut the fuck up, John. Keep digging at your own peril. Not that it means anything to you (or so you at least pretend), but you’re about to push things and people some place it’s best not to go.

    That’s all the niceness I can muster after your douche revue at Ophelia’s and the douche biscuit crap you’re tossing at Sally. Stop.

  68. John Morales says

    SallyStrange,

    Here’s the thing:

    I don’t trust you. I don’t believe you.

    Your having my back is entirely contingent on whether you can empathize with my feeling of having been wronged, and you suck at empathizing.

    Your honesty is balm to me, though you likely won’t believe that, either.

    (Thank you)

    And yes, I apparently suck at empathising; this I cannot deny.

    That written, does it not seem (though you know better) that I’ve “had your (I speak of the plural you) back” on at least one occasion, in my years of posting here?

    (Because if intention ain’t magic, the corollary is that actions are not meritorious merely on their intent)

  69. John Morales says

    Caine: this is one of those times to shut the fuck up, John.

    Or my reputation will be damaged beyond recovery?

    (Do you by now still not know I don’t subscribe to deontological ethical imperatives?)

    That written, I thank you for the heads-up.

    (I hereby comply)

  70. says

    I don’t know about dogs specifically, TLC, but two of our family cats have been euthanized and it was abundantly clear when they were just … done. A few years ago when one of them had developed oral cancer and I knew the end was finally close, I scheduled a day to take him to the vet. But I ended up going in two days before that because one morning my little chow-hound wasn’t interested in his breakfast at all. And when I told my vet simply “he didn’t want to eat today,” he knew exactly what I meant.

  71. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Kristinc: Thanks. I suspect it’s pretty close to the same thing.

    Eating doesn’t necessarily involve putting weight on her sore limb, and so she’s still pretty enthusiastic about that. Same with napping in the sunlight.

    The other day the chickens were sitting in the sun with her, and then she put her head up to accept a piece of meat, and the one chicken was like “OHSHIT That’s a large shaggy carnivore!” all of a sudden. I thought it was cute.

  72. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    I’m not even done reading the thread on B&W and I can’t believe this shit.

    Again: care to establish your basis for opining that the example provided constitutes creepy, sexist behavior?

    Is it really so very creepy that poly people take a chance in inviting you in? Me, I’d be flattered)

    You keep asking people to explain why it’s sexist even after they’ve done so. You deny people’s explanations and demand more. You’re JAQing off so hard right now.

    Also, “hurr hurr if someone asked me for sex I’d be flattered” is a privileged straight-dood statement that the pitizens use all the damn time.

    What the fuck is wrong with you?

  73. Aquaria says

    Eye shades. Bandanna. Failing that, a pillow.

    Different things work for different people.

    Here are the things that I discovered were the best ways to get sleep when it was light out:

    1) Blackout drapes work far better than eye shades, bandanas and a pillow over your head. All of those can slip off or slide off, and then you’re in a world of trouble.

    2) A cool temperature, in your bedroom if nowhere else. If it was 65-72 F (18 – 22 C) in my bedroom, I slept like a log, the closer to 65, the better. I lived with the utility bills during the summer in Texas, to get the sleep I needed.

    3) Having a pre-sleep “trigger”, like playing Free Cell, to wind down before going to sleep. It’s something that you will do only when you’re wanting to wind down to go to sleep. Hence playing X rounds of Free Cell.

    4) Going to bed at a set time.

    5) A comfortable bed, linens and pillows. Don’t cheap out. Think of a bed as an important investment. It will likely see more of you than nearly any other single item you buy–1/3 of your life will be spent on it. When traveling, stay at hotels that have good beds, linens and pillows.

    There’s a lot more, but those are the important ones.

  74. says

    Good morning
    I’m waiting for the people from the furniture store to mail me the instructions. I’m not very confident that this will work since I had to spell “yahoo” twice to dissuade the lady from using a J in that word.

    Koshka
    That’s so terrible. I’m sorry for your son, I can only imagine the pain, and I’m sorry that people are plain out assholes.

    back to names again
    The kids now that when I use their first+middle names they’re in Deep Shit™

    Oh and I know a woman who named her son Jesse. You’re allowed to guess their last name…

    Audley
    Piece of serious advice: Get a 100 piece pack of those sheets for incontinent people. I had the 25″ X 25″ size to put on the changing table. Because neonatals have this uncanny tendency to pee whenever you open their diaper and the crotch gets some fresh air. I figured out that those sheets would cost me as much as washing all those towels minus the work of washing 100 towels.

    ++++
    Why am I neither surprised about DJ Grothe or John Morales. And JT seems to have taken a leaf out of Greg Laden’s book.

  75. lorn says

    Obviously that is a pre-default photo of Iceland. For everyone knows that Iceland became a black hole of suffering and despair after they defaulted. I have it on good authority that due to financial ruin and wholesale starvation all the children have been, or will soon be, spitted, roasted over a fire and eaten. Such is the fate of all who do not abide by the terms the international bankers, saints among men all, offer.

  76. madtom1999 says

    I’d often heard that the beer in Iceland was one of the most expensive in the world and wonderd why anyone drank it at that price.
    I’d forgotten about the midnight sun…

  77. Sili says

    rorschach

    Sili @ 306,

    interesting, did Rebecca tell you that ? If she wants someone neutral or out of the loop to write about it, I’d be more than happy to. This whole banning/blacklisting stuff is to me very telling, it’s a reliable sign that someone ahould pick another movement.

    She mentioned in her talk that some events had received requests that she be blacklisted.

    I asked that organisers publish any such emails, but my use of “naming and shaming” lead to the answer that more women were afraid of speaking out now because of the backlash.

    So let me just repeat that event organisers must take an active role in stopping this. Harassment policies are a good start, but if anyone receives vile emails, they should publish them from their position of authority. It’s not enough that individuals say “I will not share a stage with this fucker”, it must be the organisation that says publically “We will not invite this person, because we consider them a threat to our visitors.”

    AAI and other big groups could take a lead role by saying that they’ll not support any conferences that do not have and adhere to an anti-harassment policy.

    We cannot keep expecting Rosa Parkses to go to the front of the bus on their own. It’s high time to call in the national guard.

  78. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    I just saw and reposted this story on Facebook about how video games and internet porn are destroying this generation of men (and apparently only men, for some reason).

    It’s a buffet of bullshit! You’ve got some unsourced scientific claims here, some moral shaming and panic there, some gross generalizations sprinkled on top. It’s great.

  79. says

    I have discovered something. Writing characters is dangerous.

    I do this thing where I write a basic biography, and then I come up with questions to ask the character. So in my fourth question – “Do you have a significant other?” – Karthus Kole answered that no he did not, but he was dating the daughter of the previous Captain of the Guard when he was in his unit.

    I have invented a girlfriend (ish.) They broke up, but they’re still interested in each other. Now in my ‘must be sadistic’ to the main character phase (Vonnegut’s 6th rule) I have to decide whether sadism will be “murder Trisha” or “hurt Trisha really badly.”

  80. carlie says

    I did see TLC’s comment to which he is referring after it went up, and now see that it is gone without any trace (no “comment deleted” placeholder). I wonder if John’s comment there will stand.

    John, I read the whole thing yesterday at Ophelia’s with some disbelief. Not that you don’t understand why people are upset about it; you’ve never hidden that you have some blind spots understanding emotional reactions to some social situations. But I don’t think I’ve ever seen you bear down on it so hard for so long before. Usually you make one or two or a few comments to such effect and then let it go since you know it’s just a standoff and nothing will come of it. What happened to make you keep going at it? It was really upsetting to a lot of people, especially the ones engaging directly with you.

  81. says

    Alethea:

    But just to be different, there’s also Macsen, from a Welsh myth – the dream of Macsen Wledig.

    Ooooh, I do like that! I also like a more unusual name with a more common nickname.

    I’m gonna text Mr Darkheart with this idea now. :)

    Caine,
    I like Maxime, but I don’t think Mr Darkheart is a huge fan. :-/

    I don’t like this compromise bullshit.

    Giliell,

    Get a 100 piece pack of those sheets for incontinent people.

    Brilliant! I will definitely get some.

  82. says

    Also Caine:

    As for Maxine, I prefer Maxime (French) or Maxa (German). Of course, I’m not the one having a kid.

    Hey, I need all the advice I can get!

    Although I do like Max for a girl*, since I have a traditionally male nickname, I feel like giving my little girl a traditionally male (nick)name would end up being far too twee.

    *I like men’s names for women in general. I once know a woman named Michael and I still think that’s the coolest thing ever.

  83. sometimes quirky says

    Gah! I’ve been in bed sick for the last few days and I come back to find I’m 2,000+ comments behind! I’ll never catch up at this rate…

  84. says

    Hey, I have to say that I’m enjoying having more time to comment on Pharyngula once again…I missed it a bit, and had slacked off last year for various reasons. It’s never boring here, is it…:-)

  85. Esteleth, Raging Dyke of Fuck Mountain says

    Happiestsadist, Markita,
    I’ll be coming to Toronto from Niagara Falls. Probably arriving in Toronto midafternoon?

    My email: esteleth AT gmail. Let’s coordinate something.

  86. Rev. BigDumbChimp says

    and organised for Voodoo to be shot and buried.

    Shot? No Vets around to administer drugs?

  87. says

    Oh ye gods, the bed is up
    Everytime I buy furniture some place that is not Ikea I remember why I usually do so.
    Apart from the missing instructions for which to obtain you need a Y-chromosome, some of the holes were drilled badly so the boards don’t form a right angle and one variety of screws was short. 21 pieces short.
    There’s a store getting a harsh email.

  88. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    @Giliell

    I feel the same way about furniture as I do about clothing: they’re such an unpleasant experience to buy most of the time that I use what I do have until it falls apart.

    Speaking of which, I really need a new mattress. It’s caving in so much it’s gonna look like a taco shell soon.

  89. Walton says

    *I like men’s names for women in general. I once know a woman named Michael and I still think that’s the coolest thing ever.

    I assume you don’t mean HRH Princess Michael of Kent…

  90. says

    We named my daughter Mackenzie. Her nick is Mac. (as in Duncan MacLeod of the clan MacLeod)
    If she had been a boy we were going with Conner. Have I ever mentioned we are total nerds?

    So far we have met several kids, of both genders, with that name although the trend seems to be more girls with that name.

  91. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    @133

    Oh dear, I just looked at it. Can we amend the definition of JAQing off to include “I just want to have a reasoned debate”? Guys like Gorbachev are insufferably proud of themselves because they’re oh-so-reasonable-and-rational, the obvious but unspoken corollary being that his opponents are not rational and reasonable. Seriously, fuck him.

  92. keenacat says

    Sorry, threadrupt again and also arguing against MRA junk in the Real scientists-thread.
    But I need to thank you for being there, as in, I need to thank all of the horde for existing and hanging around here and I almost feel thankful for the dunce being a clueless fuckwit MRA.

    The day before yesterday my boyfriend of 5,5 years left me on accounts of not being sure if he loves me anymore. We live together and he moved out.
    I am suffering from depression since forever and this made it come back in full force, even though I had been reasonably well controlled beforehand and not had issues even during finals, when stress had alsways gotten to me in the past. I felt severely suicidal yesterday (after he left the night before I drank quite a bit of vodka and this soothed my self-destructive tendencies). I felt severely suicidal this morning. Being a doc now (oh, how important this was to me before he left…)I doubled my antidepressant medication and searched out places to have crisis intervention, writing mails to get a slot for intervention at a womans centre and checked the hospitals I’d be able to go if my suicidal urges are getting out of hand.

    Coming here and fighting this dipshit has given me considerable rest and I feel much better now, way less sucidial and under less pressure to hurt myself.
    Funny how it goes, isn’t it?

    Sorry for everyone else on TET, I am currently unable to read all of your comments. I still feel a group hug is in order.

    (((((Horde)))))

  93. says

    skeptifem,

    even the very wicked must rest sometime….I will look at it tomorrow…

    Carlie, what now ? I can’t cope anymore….

  94. carlie says

    It does appear from that new post that only four people have been banned at JT’s, so if he said that banned people have been trying to sockpuppet back in, he’s pretty clearly saying it’s one of the three previously named banees. And not to be all dialing my loyalty up to 11 on it, but I really, seriously don’t believe that any of those three would do that. I thought before that maybe he was doing a lot of behind-the-scenes banning and was getting his names mixed up and assuming some people were regulars here who weren’t, but now I’d really like some clarification on that. Accusing of trying to do an end run around a ban, and especially telling another blogger to chastise readers on his own blog for it, is a pretty serious matter.

  95. Beatrice says

    I thought Josh and Ms Daisy Cutter were banned, with Happiestsadist only getting a warning. So who was the third?

  96. Esteleth, Raging Dyke of Fuck Mountain says

    !!! keenacat !!!

    *hugs* *tea* *chocolate* *kittens* *more hugs*

    Please, take care of yourself. And don’t be hesitant to ask for help. You have friends here.

  97. carlie says

    keenacat, it sounds like you are in control, but please please keep a card with the phone hotlines on you at all times: 1-800-273-TALK (8255) for US national, here for links to other countries. You’re doing everything right, but you know it can hit hard and unexpectedly at any time.

    If you’re on the upswing a little bit, Captain Awkward is a fantastic and hilarious and great site/advice column for all kinds of what to do in that situation kinds of things. In another vein entirely, yo, should I dump this asshole, simply for the venting relief.

  98. Pteryxx says

    {{{keenacat}}}

    That’s the Horde for you… hugs and chewtoys. Good for what ails ya.

    Can I just say thank you to y’all warriors of the Horde too. There are so many of you that I can let myself fall asleep on the keyboard, or turn my back on JT’s trainwreck or the MRAs in the “Research” thread, because I know it’s being taken care of. I DON’T have to do it all myself. This is the safest place I know.

  99. dianne says

    Keenacat: Hugs, chocolate, kittens, whatever makes you feel better to you. Also advice: Don’t be your own doctor. Your medical judgement with respect to yourself is suspect*. Get a psychiatrist, go to the ER, whatever you have to do to stay safe. You’re making all the right moves in trying to get help, but if the depression gets out of hand and you can’t get outpatient treatment right away, go to an ER. Please?

    *No reflection on you: EVERYONE’S medical judgement is suspect with respect to themselves.

  100. FossilFishy (Lobed-finned Killer of Threads) says

    keenacat: I’m such a minor player in this here, er, organisation that I can’t really call myself part of the horde. Be that as it may, hugs for you if you want them. I’ve been (more or less, it’s such a subjective thing after all) where you are. Feeling suicidal doesn’t mean you’re weak and the actions you’ve taken to mitigate your circumstances speak to someone who has a reserve of inner strength despite your aneurotypical brain. I used to personify my depression, I pretended that it was a predator trying to kill me. I got angry at it and that anger dragged me through the nadirs of my mood swings on more than one occasion. Bah, never mind that. Do what you have to do to stay with us. Fight, survive and show that foul disease just who’s the boss, kay?

  101. carlie says

    And do us a favor and keep checking in, ok? Until you get a response from the local women’s center and they’re taking care of you.

  102. Pteryxx says

    *five minutes later…*

    Oh my nonexistent gods, JT’s actually defending his use of “bitch”. This is getting into clownshoe territory.

    Link to comment: (The OP is highly inflammatory, fyi)

    http://freethoughtblogs.com/wwjtd/2012/05/31/weve-got-ourselves-a-sleuth-and-he-has-earned-ban-4/#comment-65068

    JT Eberhard says:
    May 31, 2012 at 10:31 am

    That’s so strange. Because, lots of people who didn’t “kiss my ass” are still allowed to comment and disagree.

    It’s almost like I really do give a damn about removing the derailers and nobody else. Crazy, right?

    And also, you do realize that words can have more than one meaning, right? To bitch, as a verb, means to whine.

  103. Predator Handshake says

    I called out JT for using “bitch” to describe what the people he banned were doing, and he was kind enough to give me a dictionary definition explaining that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with talking like that! How helpful.

  104. Walton says

    Sending sympathies and best wishes to keenacat. That’s incredibly awful. And as a fellow sufferer from a mood disorder, I know all too well that when things are bad, they can get really bad.

    All I can say is, from my own experience of depressive moods… as hard as it often is, try to spend as much time as possible socializing, whether in real life or in meatspace. Call your friends. Email your friends. Comment here. In such situations I’ve always found that spending time alone with one’s thoughts only makes the emotional pain worse. It’s vital to have someone to talk to.

  105. says

    keencat — So sorry to hear about that, and best wishes.

    Re JT — yeah. There’s no hope. Even after all that, I couldn’t believe he’d pull the “gendered slurs are fine!” card.

  106. says

    Well, I’m not in mod at JT’s, and I’m wondering how many times I have to describe different times that I’ve been raped before he actually considers that maybe rape isn’t some abstract thing that is good to reference at any given point in time.

    I find that a good substitute for “bitch” is “whinge.”

  107. says

    Some links….

    How to spot a misogynist. I love this:

    In case you didn’t know, women in Afghanistan are being stoned to death. So why don’t you just go ahead and submit your complaint to the STFU file known as my PENIS?

    4 Gamer Behaviors that Need to Change Now. By which the OP is referring to that type of gamer who gives the majority a bad name:

    Video Games are now accepted as a mainstream form of entertainment, but no one seems to have told gamers this. As a community, we’re still stuck in the mindset of an unfairly persecuted fringe-group, and it’s really stopped us from maturing.

    Normative sexism: Geek edition. Note that in the comments, someone quotes some d00d as saying, “Strong female characters break my sense of immersion.” WTF.

    7 states which ban atheists from holding public office. (infographic)

    Todd VanDerWerff, and Alyssa Rosenberg, for the win. (Note: I’ve never watched Girls and have no opinion on it.)

  108. Pteryxx says

    Blacksmith, good to see you about. Jennifer’s new here but also local to the Dallas region; she was asking if anyone knew secular counselors in the previous thread or two, if you’re able to help.

  109. keenacat says

    Thank you so much everyone. Not feeling alone in this mess helps tremendously.
    Friends are currently an issue, as most of “my” friends have been “our” friends and thus his friends. I have a hard time keeping up friendships by myself and with him leaving, I have exactly one person I can rely on who is avaliable and willing to be there just for me. And this is a lot of shit to impose on others, even if they are your friends and genuinely want to help. I also am at my mom’s currently, and studying somewhere far from here has left me with pretty much no one at my old hometown besides my immediate family.
    I was scheduled to come here yesterday way before this happened, but it means I’m half a country away from my usual psychiatrist.

    Don’t be your own doctor. Your medical judgement with respect to yourself is suspect*. Get a psychiatrist, go to the ER, whatever you have to do to stay safe. You’re making all the right moves in trying to get help, but if the depression gets out of hand and you can’t get outpatient treatment right away, go to an ER. Please?

    I know. This being on such short notice I haven’t had the time to get to my psychiatrist before I went to my mom’s. But I’ve taken my current medication with double dosage before (venlafaxine), so I know I’m not in for any bullshit and it will help me get over this.
    I’ve also made a plan to which ER I’d go in case of breakdown over the weekend (they have a specialized psychiatric ER in a major hospital not too far away) and am now waiting for feedback from the womans centre. They will probably schedule me for monday. They can also get me an outpatient referral for short-time psychotherapy and possible med changes.

    All of you, be assured that I feel incredibly lucky to be able to come here. I’ll check in regularly. Thanks for worrying about me and for letting me vent. Sometimes it’s so hard to burden friends or family with this crap. You make me not feel alone and all the virtual hugs, kittens, chocolate and general sweetness are so much appreciated.

  110. Pteryxx says

    …Oh heck, I forgot Jennifer is right here. Scratch my over-sharing-over-helping-ness… I should probably go back to sleep. <_< Sorry about that.

  111. d(thunk) over d(MQ) = SQRRAWK! says

    Yes. oh fuckity fuck. JT definitely knows how to derail his own discussions.

  112. keenacat says

    Giliell,

    thank you thank you thank you!
    What a precious offer. I’m currently with my family but when I get back and he’d actually not living with me anymore, a retreat somewhere else might just be the thing…
    I’ll take note of your mail adress.

  113. says

    keenacat, wishing you much better days soon. Please take care of yourself and please check in frequently.

    JT….WTF? I am beyond words, now.

    skeptifem, your comments on the Fix This thread have been amazing.

  114. says

    I Confess that I rather admire JT and his work. But (you knew there was a but coming, right?) he has really disappointed me and continues to do so. I have so many objections but one, in particular, is annoying me that hasn’t been addressed as far as I know. It is the “ally” thing. It is my opinion, that proclaiming yourself an ally to any cause/group,etc. reeks of …what’s the word?… grandstanding…pompousness…argh! I don’t know. It just doesn’t feel right to me. The label of “ally” should be granted by the group/cause/persons. It should not be taken by oneself.

    He is human, as far as I know, so expecting perfection is unrealistic (especially given all of my own failings) but I really really wish he would get a fucking clue.

  115. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Oh, JT wants to take me seriously. I am very, very moved.

    Funny, he could have done that a few days ago.

    I know this will do nothing to help but good luck keenacat. It is to your credit that you know your options that can help you and that you are acting on this. Large point, this should be the norm for everyone; having options, knowing them and being able to act on it.

    At times, this seems like a utopian dream.

  116. dianne says

    Keenacat: I hope my comment didn’t come out as criticism. You’re doing all the right things. But I know the temptation to say, “Oh, well, I know what I’m doing and don’t need to bother someone else…” when dealing with your own health issues. Especially a depression where it can be pretty hard to get motivated to do much of anything. Just…take care of yourself and let others take care of you when you need it.

  117. says

    @Ye Olde Blacksmith

    “It is the “ally” thing.”

    Same here. I will not accept others telling me how much they are my ally. I will decide that myself, thank you very much.

    At least I learned something, because I made the same mistake and can now fix it.

    I was an ally for my benefit. To feel better about myself for being such a good, liberal, tolerant and enlightened person (and not like those others, stupid and religious and so on).

    But being an ally should be about them.

  118. David Marjanović says

    keenacat, *hugs* *chocolate* *thyme honey* *happiness tea* *well-being tea* *more hugs* I thought you were coming to the conference in Cologne?

    Congratulations, TLC!

    Without further commentary.

    :-)

    I actually run out of beer and wine and forgot to buy more

    I thought you didn’t drink wine, you only put it into onion soup?

    pfff. accommodationist.

    ROTFL!

    Also, I accidentally stuck my hand into liquid nitrogen today.

    :-S :-S :-S

    *hot chocolate*

    At the coffee shop, they have a sign in the men’s toilet that reads “Please DO NOT place nappies in the rubbish bins. A nappy bin is available in the Ladies Toilet of this building for your disposal convenience. Thank you.”

    *slow-motion epic facepalm*

    Jebus crimbo, I had to go through their entire list of “soaps” to find two that didn’t contain sodium lauryl sulfate.

    Reminds me of the laws of mol.bio. labs:

    11. Thou shalt abstain from the use of dodecylsulfate [sic] for dodecylsulfate is the D E V I L. Thou shalt remember that man dissolved in dodecylsulfate appeareth as a single peak in the ultracentrifuge.

    Dayight highlights my obvious physical flaws, like my red hair. I never thought it was a bad thing to have red hair, but every time I walk past a group of girls lately they are talking about how ‘rangas are gross. Oh well.

    …what?

    Mak[s]imus (Polish)

    Fixed. I hope nobody names their children after typos on the Internet!

    Maxa (German)

    What???

    Macsen

    Could that be from Maxentius?

    Caine: this is one of those times to shut the fuck up, John.

    Or my reputation will be damaged beyond recovery?

    (Do you by now still not know I don’t subscribe to deontological ethical imperatives?)

    Let me put it this way: this is one of the times when you think you’ve understood people but you haven’t.

    Sometimes you do understand people. This is just not one of those times.

    …Besides, don’t try to claim you don’t care about your reputation. In the long run, on certain topics, you do.

    Also, “hurr hurr if someone asked me for sex I’d be flattered” is a privileged straight-dood statement that the pitizens use all the damn time.

    Quite. Have you never been bullied, John? That’s what this is.

    2) A cool temperature, in your bedroom if nowhere else. If it was 65-72 F (18 – 22 C) in my bedroom, I slept like a log, the closer to 65, the better.

    Of course, different temperatures work for different people. My mom has serious trouble falling asleep at 20 °C, let alone above that. In winter, she sleeps at a scary 11 °C.

    The kids now that when I use their first+middle names they’re in Deep Shit™

    Am I glad I lack a middle name. =8-)

    Wasn’t “Mercia” one of the Anglo-saxon kingdoms in old England?

    Wasn’t that a rhetorical question? :-)

    Apart from the missing instructions for which to obtain you need a Y-chromosome, some of the holes were drilled badly so the boards don’t form a right angle and one variety of screws was short. 21 pieces short.

    WTF. The bed I bought at Not-IKEA had no such problems whatsoever.

    Can I just say thank you to y’all warriors of the Horde too. There are so many of you that I can let myself fall asleep on the keyboard, or turn my back on JT’s trainwreck or the MRAs in the “Research” thread, because I know it’s being taken care of. I DON’T have to do it all myself.

    *hug* I know the feeling. :-)

    Oh my nonexistent gods, JT’s actually defending his use of “bitch”. This is getting into clownshoe territory.

    FFS. How did I manage to overlook that!

  119. carlie says

    keenacat – if you haven’t thought of it, your normal psychiatrist might be able to make a few calls and get you in somewhere faster as a direct referral than you can by calling up personally. It shouldn’t be that way, but sometimes the doctors themselves know exactly what to say to cut through the bureaucratic stuff and just get you there, and sometimes a reticent secretary is more willing to squeeze an appointment in for a doctor calling about their patient than someone (even a doctor) calling for themselves.

    And the nice thing about having TET friends is that you’re likely to have someone “live” online at pretty much any time of the day or night, thanks to the worldwide coverage. :)

  120. carlie says

    …of course, if you’re in a civilized country, that might be a useless suggestion.

  121. David Marjanović says

    I hope nobody names their children after typos on the Internet!

    See also: Michele “male Italian” Bachmann.

  122. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Jennifer, did your womb travel up to your skull and effect your brain again? Funny how this keeps happening.

  123. Predator Handshake says

    keenacat: hugs and virtual treats if you want ‘em.

    Jennifer: I wonder how long it’ll be before someone seizes on that “uppity bitch” in your ‘nym as an example of how it’s totally okay for everyone to use the word whenever? Note that I’m not criticizing you for having it in there; just trying to get my predictions in for where that thread is going. Who’s in charge of the pool?

    At least JT listened to the people who found his use of it problematic and changed the post. I mean, that was the very least he could have done.

  124. says

    Pteryxx & Jennifer:
    Sadly, I don’t have any info to share regarding counselors. :( I’ve been away from the threads for some time so am completely behind on everything.

    Been trying to get caught up but Minecraft, illness, job hunting, Minecraft, art marketing, Minecraft, etc has been getting in the way. And “joy” the last day of school is today so time priorities are about to shift quite radically. :)

  125. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    The kids now that when I use their first+middle names they’re in Deep Shit™

    My mom had eight kids and she got angry, she could not keep our names straight. When I was younger and there were fewer of us (I was and remain the oldest child.), we knew it was serious when she used the given first name and middle name. When there were eight, she rolled down all names from oldest to youngest until she got to the right name. While the anger was just as serious as years before, for us, it became just a bit more comical because of the role-call.

  126. Walton says

    Oh, and keenacat: I know we don’t really know each other (and I apologize if this is presumptuous), but you’re welcome to email me if you feel like talking. My email is david DOT nonsearchable at gmail.

    It’s good that you’re with your family right now. And going to stay with Giliell sounds like a good idea. From my own experience of depressive moods, I’m really convinced that the most important thing is to have someone to talk to.

    With regard to mental health care, it sounds like you’re doing all the right things. (In my case, I saw a therapist and a psychiatrist regularly during my year in the US, and it was definitely the right thing to do. It really helped me.)

  127. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Jennifer: I wonder how long it’ll be before someone seizes on that “uppity bitch” in your ‘nym as an example of how it’s totally okay for everyone to use the word whenever? Note that I’m not criticizing you for having it in there; just trying to get my predictions in for where that thread is going. Who’s in charge of the pool?

    This was the reason why I stopped using “bitch” in my moniker as much fun as I had using it. I got tired of MRAs and other assorted misogynists using me as their excuse to continue using “bitch” and “cunt”.

    But I loved the fact that a fierce and intelligent feminist came here using “bitch”. I support her completely in doing this even though I will not do it anymore.

    Could I be any more contradictory?

  128. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    JT is such a douchebag. And a sensitive little baby. He’s going on about how he may read Carlie’s comment because people he trusts have told him it’s good.

    Brazen declarations of thoroughgoing tribalism filters for arguments for the win, JT.

    Oh, and let me anticipate your response:

    “Yeah, cuz like, I totally never said that.”

  129. says

    Just a thought, but would any of the DFW pharynguloids be interested in a meet up in real life?

    I am hesitant to propose such a thing, especially given the most recent turns of events in the threads, but I, for one ;-) (sorry, Josh, couldn’t help myself) enjoy putting faces to nyms and all. I have an extreme aversion to large groups of strangers so meeting at conferences has been very hit or miss for me. Sometimes I can overcome it but oftentimes not. So this proposal is quite selfish on my part, I know. I think it could be quite fun and would like to try setting something up.

    There would be ground rules up front, of course, in order to ensure safety and well being (physically, emotionally, etc.). Minimum of 3 or 4 people, public and populated location, etc.

    This invite is would be for everyone, not just the ” regulars”. Lurkers strongly encouraged. :-)

    Would anyone be interested?

    (if this is out of line, please advise)

  130. David Marjanović says

    I’ve waded into the JT pool. Will be interesting to see if anyone notices my comments, especially the first one, because, uh, the thread is threaded.

    Brazen declarations of thoroughgoing tribalism filters for arguments for the win, JT.

    + 1

  131. David Marjanović says

    I have an extreme aversion to large groups of strangers so meeting at conferences has been very hit or miss for me.

    It was great that you came to Copenhagen.

  132. Predator Handshake says

    Ye Olde Blacksmith: what is DFW? I have a feeling it’s something that means I wouldn’t be able to make it to such a thing, but I’m curious.

  133. Pteryxx says

    In this case, DFW is short for Dallas-Fort Worth area. There seem to be about half a dozen of us local to there so far.

  134. says

    Thanks to everyone in this and the previous Endless Thread for wishing me well. I think my “well developed corpus callosum,” and all the other still-functional brain parts are working overtime to make new connections around the damaged parts of my brain. My left hand is slowly progresssing, going from the stupid block of flesh that knocks things over to intelligent enough to type slowly.

    Now my main problems are weakness and lack of coordination in my left leg, and a defective gyroscope that threatens my balance.

    Enough of the downer crap. Here’s some good news, the U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Boston has declared the Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional.

    An appeals court ruled Thursday that the heart of a law that denies a host of federal benefits to gay married couples is unconstitutional.

    The 1st U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Boston said the Defense of Marriage Act, which defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman, discriminates against married same-sex couples by denying them federal benefits.

    The law was passed in 1996 at a time when it appeared Hawaii would legalize gay marriage. Since then, many states have instituted their own bans on gay marriage, while eight states have approved it, led by Massachusetts in 2004.

    The appeals court agreed with a lower court judge who ruled in 2010 that the law is unconstitutional because it interferes with the right of a state to define marriage and denies married gay couples federal benefits given to heterosexual married couples, including the ability to file joint tax returns…..

    http://www.latimes.com/news/la-naw-doma-053112,0,7656927.story

    Mormons played a big role in establishing DOMA and in fighting anti-gay battles in 1996, especially in Hawaii. They just didn’t catch as much flak then as they did when they carpet-bombed California with anti-gay propaganda. In 1996, mormons set up “Hawaii’s Future Today” as a front group to run anti-gay marriage activities. http://www.rightsequalrights.com/mormongate/document2.html
    http://www.rightsequalrights.com/mormongate/document9.html (Many more documents available in the menu on this page.)

    Mormons played a role in the kill-the-gays law in Uganda. http://affirmation.org/news_2011/2011_066.shtml

  135. Predator Handshake says

    Ah, my suspicion was well-founded then. If something like that happens a bit farther east and maybe a little to the north, I’d definitely be down for it.

  136. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    Oh my dear sweet chocolate-dipped lord. I engaged in the JT thread too, and in response to a post I made about how Marginalized People engage in social justice activism for practical purposes rather, like wanting to be able to marry a loved one or not be sexually harassed at a convention, he posted this guilt-trip to me:

    The hostility to people doing their best to understand, the accusations of darker motives that the commenter couldn’t possibly know (see Coyote and those like him), make me not want to write about this subject again (and I probably won’t).

    I’m honestly probably doing to drop out of this comment section because of it. There might be something really good that gets said further down that I’ll miss. That’ll suck. Blame me if you’d like for not listening or what have you, but I’ve been listening, very intently, and have found much of what goes on in these threads to be useless noise. That makes me want to stop listening. I would think it might worry you that someone who cares about your position no longer wants to listen to you (the “you” here is a general “you”). You should expect that of people contributing to your situation, but not from those who want to help you fix it.

    “Well, you see, I’d really love to be a good ally and listen to you, but you just don’t bear your cross properly! Even Jesus knew it goes on the LEFT shoulder, not the right. Until you can suffer quietly and with faux dignity, I can’t support you. Ta! *takes off on jetski*”

  137. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Lynna, it is good to know that you are still making progress.

  138. Nutmeg says

    TLC: *hugs* for you and your dog. I’m glad she’s still enjoying life. When our old Golden was ready to go (arthritis and a canine disease similar to MS), she stopped eating. With food-motivated dogs like Goldens, that’s often the sign. Until then, if you can keep her comfortable and happy, that’s good.

    keenacat: *lots of hugs* I hope you can get treatment quickly.

  139. says

    That makes me want to stop listening. I would think it might worry you that someone who cares about your position no longer wants to listen to you (the “you” here is a general “you”). You should expect that of people contributing to your situation, but not from those who want to help you fix it.

    “That should worry you”? Ah, the veiled threat. Shut up, if you know what is good for you…

    WTF, JT? Seriously, this is beyond belief.

    Lynna, wow on those links – also the one you posted yesterday about a mass exodus (but that one was a good wow – need to find it and read it because I was too rushed yesterday when I saw it).

  140. says

    David Marjanović @190:
    That trip was definitely a hit and not a miss. In fact, it is the motivation for my invite. I had a fantastic time hanging out with you all. I have attended a few other conferences, the most recent being the SSA conf in Frisco, Tx but “The Shyness” was too much for me and I missed out on the socializing.

    Audley Darkheart (liar and scoundrel) @ 193:
    Thanks!

    lynna, OM @ 194: *hugs*

  141. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    That makes me want to stop listening. I would think it might worry you that someone who cares about your position no longer wants to listen to you (the “you” here is a general “you”). You should expect that of people contributing to your situation, but not from those who want to help you fix it.

    Wow. Wow.

    Fuck you, you douchebag prick JT. At least it’s clear that you’re not just “not helping,” you’re out as an adversary.

  142. Pteryxx says

    *correction on misspelling DJ’s name: Grothe. I KNOW I’m spread too thin when my spelling starts to goe…

  143. says

    Keenacat, {hugses}. Please take care of yourself (I know you are, continue!), check in often and rant/vent/cry all you like. Our collective shoulders, they are big.

    David, I did note the book is from 1946, I have no doubt there are errors and what are now obsolete forms in the book. Thanks for the correction.

    Audley, one of my most fave names for girls is Wallis. I has a serious love of that name.

  144. says

    @Blacksmith: Yay for happy marriages! I’ve been married three years now, and I am genuinely depressed by all of the talk I see of miserable people who hate their spouses. Even if we weren’t married or into the sexing each other, I’d still be besties with mine because he’s a phenomenal human being. Congratulations!

    My email is atheistsocialistfeminazi at gmail dot com. I can’t make any promises about meetups because I’ve got parenting to do and we’ve only got one car (not to mention that I am not terribly social IRL, although I suspect that of most people on threads like this), but I’d be willing to give it a go.

  145. says

    Lynna, wow on those links – also the one you posted yesterday about a mass exodus (but that one was a good wow – need to find it and read it because I was too rushed yesterday when I saw it).

    Here’s the link for the mass resignation announcement:
    http://resignmormon.blogspot.com/ They need to add directions to Ensign Downs Park in Salt Lake City. And they need to organize housing for mormons from out of town, etc. I think they are just getting started on their organizational efforts. They could use some help from locals. Ex-mormons who have already resigned are welcome.

    As for the links to official documents tying the mormon church to the anti-gay campaign in Hawaii, there are a lot more of them. Some of the documents specifically state that the previous Prophet, Seer, and Revelator, Hinckley, ordered the campaign. Hinckley is the prophet that mormons call the cuddly one. Yeah, very cuddly of him to put big sums of money behind efforts to strip gays of their civil rights, and to plan to do it all behind a false front so that the LDS Church would not be connected to the campaign. http://www.rightsequalrights.com/mormongate/document8.html

  146. says

    In this case, DFW is short for Dallas-Fort Worth area. There seem to be about half a dozen of us local to there so far.

    Oh, so, if I accepted a job offer in Dallas, it might not be as awful as I thought it would be? I’d get to have my ankles bitten by Pteryxx and meet other cool atheists?

    Good to know, good to know.

    (There’s a lot of jobs in my field down there, and I’ve been resisting applying for them because, well, Texas. But at a certain point I have to bite the bullet and start making some goddamn money.)

  147. says

    Jennifer:

    @Blacksmith: Yay for happy marriages! I’ve been married three years now, and I am genuinely depressed by all of the talk I see of miserable people who hate their spouses.

    Noobs, both of ya! :D Mister & I had our 33rd anniversary this March. There are more than few 30+ers here.

    Happy Anniversary, Blacksmith!

  148. keenacat says

    I feel better. My mom just got home from work and was all excited because she got offered a company car! She’ll have to pay for gas, but all the insurance and upkeep stuff will be paid for by her employer.
    Given that she’s working as a housekeeper/receptionist/kitchen help/bread baker at a small, family-owned hotel this is a big deal and some wage raise right there.

    I’ve also made some plans to try and find new friends that are unaffiliated with the ex when I get back home. I desperately need plans to keep sane. We’ve had our lifes planned out, had been talking kids in two or three years, wanted to move to my hometown for a couple of years and work here… I felt my whole future was taken from me when he told me he was leaving (besides my partner and best friend). Also (and irreplaceable) my second family, his parents and sister. Being so far from my actual family I was so happy to have a second set of “parents” to care for me.
    I’ve been thinking of joining a meetup of the Giordano-Bruno-Foundation (an atheist, secularist organisation in germany) and find some sports I like. I wanted to try some kind of martial arts to empower myself and also maybe take up dancing again.

  149. says

    Only in Utah would local support for a gay pride parade be headlined like this:

    Mormons to march in church clothes in Utah gay pride parade.

    Ummm. What do the “church clothes” have to do with it? I like it, though. Should make for great photo opportunities. Still a little weird. And why is all this mormon “love” for their gay brothers and sisters not adding up to support for gay marriage?

    Note that, to mormons, “church clothes” requires no explanation.

    Erika Munson has never been to a pride parade. But this weekend, she will be in one, along with at least 100 other active Mormons who — decked out in their Sunday best — will march at the head of the Utah Pride Parade to show support for the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community.

    “There have been so many years of heartbreak and strife between the LDS and LGBT community,” said Munson, organizer of the group Mormons Building Bridges. “We just want to send out a message of love to the LGBT community that God loves them because of who they are.”

    Munson is not gay, and she’s not someone who became involved because of a gay family member or friend. Rather, she started the group Mormons Building Bridges a few weeks ago to support LGBT Utahns, to show other Latter-day Saints that it’s all right to embrace the LGBT community and to reach out to LGBT teens in hopes of stemming suicide rates.

    “We’re going to be marching in our church clothes,” Munson said, “and we want other LDS people to see us and say, ‘Oh, they’re just like me. Maybe I can reach out to a gay person in my congregation or not be afraid to discuss this issue.’ “…

    From the Comments section below the SL Tribune article:

    … So I have to be respectful of the gay agenda and can’t judge, but by not agreeing that gay marriage is a right, I can be called a bigot, or ignorant, or unintelligent and you don’t have to be respectful in return? Folks, this is why the gay agenda has so many struggles. …Call me when you can be civil. God DOES love us all, but His love won’t override the judgements from our sins in this life and if we live contrary to what He has said.

  150. says

    As some residents of Utah plan for gay pride events, others are fighting to keep the fact that OMG Lesbians exist! from their children. The headline reads:

    Utah school district places book about lesbian moms behind counter.

    http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/54209929-78/book-district-williams-parents.html.csp

    A picture book about a lesbian couple raising a child was removed from the shelves of elementary school libraries in Davis County after a group of parents raised objections about the suitability of the story.

    In Our Mother’s House by Patricia Polacco remains accessible at schools in the Davis School District, but only if a student presents a permission slip from a parent to check out the book, said district spokesman Chris Williams….

    “State law says schools can’t have anything in the curriculum that advocates homosexuality,” Williams said. “That is why it is now behind the counter.”

  151. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    Well, everybody, JT has given his sign-off. Several days and what, a thousand comments?, later, and this is the revelation he leaves us with…

    Felt I should say this:

    Thanks, most of you, for your input, your interest, and I really am taking what is said under advisement.

    I appreciate your efforts to help not only you but the situation as a whole. Your input will absolutely be reflected the next time I address this issue.

    Godspeed, JT! *flatulent trumpet plays, American flag waves, eagle sheds a year*

  152. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    It is good to know that Heather Has Two Mommies is in the same class as Hustler.

    *eyeroll*

  153. says

    Well FUCK.

    Just got off the phone with Mr Darkheart and he totally shot Macsen down.

    Can you see my surprised face?

    *sigh* Sorry. I just feel like I’m the only person who has sacrificed the names that were truly loved, in the hope that we could reach a compomise. Come to find out, I’m the only one compromising. :-/

  154. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    @Audley

    If you’d like, we could make up names for Mr. Darkheart instead.

  155. Pteryxx says

    I stand by my completely unscientific wild guess that JT has about a 15% chance of showing signs of “he gets it” three months hence. If he does, I’ll (use that as an excuse to) cook myself a steak.

    If he apologizes, I’ll buy a lottery ticket. >_>

  156. says

    Unholy fuck, the obliviousness:

    Back to the topic of the OP, I have done my part in bringing my female spouse to this event. I have only one spouse so I can’t do any more………

    Dude may as well have said “I have done my part in bringing my female Real Doll to this event.”

  157. says

    Audley:

    Come to find out, I’m the only one compromising. :-/

    Then stop doing it. Put your belly down, Woman! Tell Mr. Darkheart if he doesn’t at least consider names you love, it will be Jayne, male or female. Let him smoke on that a while.

  158. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    If Darkfetus is named Jayne, will Audley knitted the spawn a funky little hat. And be given a weapon named Vera?

    Who’s up for a rousing round of The Ballad Of Jayne?

  159. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Caine, perhaps you should make Jayne’s hat.

    (Could not resist the rhyme.)

  160. says

    Janine:

    Who’s up for a rousing round of The Ballad Of Jayne?

    The Hero of Canton, the man they call Jayne Now here is what separates heroes From common folk like you and I The man they call Jayne He turned ’round his plane…

  161. Nutmeg says

    Audley: When my mom was pregnant with me, she and my dad got very sick of the grandparents asking them what they were going to call me. So they told my grandma that they were going to name me “Ethel Thelma Lisped-version-of-last-name”. The grandparents never asked again.

    It probably wasn’t so funny when, a few years later, I needed speech therapy to pronounce my last name as anything other than Lisped-version.

    Anyway, I like Jayne as a name for Darkfetus, but I’m sure you can think of some other, truly terrible alternatives.

  162. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Oh fuck, I’d have to learn how to knit. Successfully. Uh oh.

    Perhaps being able to knit would be a hindrance to making the hat.

  163. Mattir says

    Pretty much threadrupt, but just wanted to say that it’d be nice if the FtB bloggers who simply don’t want Those Bad Commenters From Pharyngula to comment on their blogs would just let us know and we’ll stop giving them the eyeballs? So far we’ve got Laden, JT, Zvan, and Lousy Canuck…

  164. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @Katherine Lorraine, #116

    Hey, you’ve discovered a trope.

    What about some creativity: Trisha gets promoted/suddenly gains superpowers/etc., Karthus says something stupid b/c of his jealousy. Karthus wants to take it back but Trisha doesn’t trust him anymore.

    I know, I know, the latter just isn’t realistic…

  165. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    but just wanted to say that it’d be nice if the FtB bloggers who simply don’t want Those Bad Commenters From Pharyngula to comment on their blogs would just let us know and we’ll stop giving them the eyeballs? So far we’ve got Laden, JT, Zvan, and Lousy Canuck…

    Yeah, the passive-aggressive stigma is really chapping my ass. Laden already banned me and some others for calling him on some of his bullshit, and JT’s on this riff where he’s gloating over having banned some Pharyngulites (he only banned 4 people, and those four happen to be Pharyngula regulars as far as I’m aware).

    I didn’t realize that valuing substance over style was such a bad thing.

  166. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @sometimes quirky, 122:

    Gah! I’ve been in bed sick for the last few days and I come back to find I’m 2,000+ comments behind! I’ll never catch up at this rate…

    When I first started on TET, it took me two months to read it from the beginning.

    Thankfully I’ve read every post since.

  167. Predator Handshake says

    Janine: I thought you were talking about the LA Guns song in the first place. LA Guns are one of the very few LA metal acts from that era that I can stand.

    I hope I’m not annoying anyone; I feel like I’ve been posting an awful lot of ASoIaF references lately. Having said that, Jeyne Poole is a pretty cool character.

  168. carlie says

    keenacat, that’s awesome about the car. And I like your plans. Take care of yourself – pamper yourself as much as you like, you deserve it.

  169. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Predator Handshake, in all of my links to music, have I ever pointed towards a hair metal act?

    Which reminds me; FUCK THE VERY CONCEPT OF ROCK OF AGES!

    Sorry, that is not my favorite music.

  170. says

    Rev,

    It means clean your fucking shower

    Ha! Perfect.

    Nutmeg,
    Currently, we’ve got The List™ on a whiteboard hanging on our fridge. I have no problem erasing the whole damned thing* and putting terrible suggestions in its place.

    Anyone want to help come up with ridiculous/terrible names?

    *Especially considering I’m the one who compiled the list AND found reliable definitions for the names AND found popularity stats for each name.

    I charted that shit out, knowwhatImsayin’?

  171. Pteryxx says

    (meta-DJ-trainwreck)

    Josh: your post #199 to DJ over there was incredibly polite! WTF! are you feeling okay?

    even more meta: I’m starting to flinch at the sight of the letter J. Time for a lunch break…

  172. drbunsen le savant fou says

    I see the comment threads at SciBlargs have up and disappeared. They’re not preserved at archive.org either, far as I can tell, nor google cache, though they are searchable through google.

    Does anyone know an alternative route by which one can reference them?

  173. says

    Congratulations, Blacksmith

    Is it just my nasty pink ladybrain or is DJ Groethe (my brain keeps changing his last name to Kröte, German for toad) much nicer at PZ’s blog whom he also failed to include in his list of people causing trouble and exagerating problems even though his posts on the subject must be among those read the most?

    Keenacat
    Those sound like good plans

  174. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Carlie:

    Oh dear – TLC, you may want to have a glance at JT’s…

    Mission accomplished!

    Being banned AND scolded in a post dedicated just to little ol’ me is more than I expected.

    I would like to thank all the pharyngula regulars who helped to educate me about these things.

    If I’ve learned one thing from this whole mess, it’s that ‘Ally’ isn’t just a label you don’t get to bestow upon yourself, it’s also something you gotta maintain… apparently, JT has said some wonderful stuff on other topics in the past, and that’s great and all, but none of that has any relevance to the mess he’s made or the hole he’s digging right now.

    Intersectionality (as I understand the concept) ensures that it’s difficult these days to just be an ‘ally’ in one area, and indeed, kind of stupid and pointless. Privilege is privilege, after all.

    /speechifying

  175. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @TLC:

    Ally ain’t just a river in egypt…

  176. Predator Handshake says

    Janine: I don’t know! I’ve only been following TET’s for a few months now. I certainly wouldn’t expect you to link to hair metal, because you seem to have pretty good taste in music. Like I said, there’s only a few of those bands that I can ever tolerate.

    I’m with you on that Rock of Ages thing though. One of my college friends posted on facebook the other day that the movie is going to ruin all those songs for him. He didn’t like when I pointed out that the people who wrote most of the songs did a fine job of ruining them in the first place. I should point out, though, that there ARE some good songs in that show that will indeed be ruined by the “Glee Treatment”. Sister Christian and To Be With You do not need any fixing, dammit!

  177. Janine: History’s Greatest Monster says

    Predator Handshake, even if I have bad taste in music (And I am sure some people would make that claim.) I would not link to hair metal.

    Sister Christian?

    Runs, screaming from the room. Motoring…

  178. QueQuoiHuh says

    *deep breath*
    I’ve been lurking here on an almost daily basis for about a year now, and I just had to stop and send a heartfelt thank you to PZ and the Horde. The scathing wit and just anger, of both the posts and the comments have kept me from losing my shit several times over the past year.
    I felt the need to finally speak up now, because I have been completely gobsmacked by JT and his posts on “derailing” over the past week.

    If JT’s blog is an Open House where all are welcome, why does he let people shit on his carpet and then kick out anyone who mentions the smell?

    And the cherry on the shitcake is DJ Groethe.
    *sigh*
    Argh, I need to back to lurking.

    Many thanks and USB cookies to all Pharyngulties.

  179. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Pterryx, which comment where? I was polite? Need to remedy that, stat.

    The only thing that would make this day even better is if a new person complains about my ‘nym and tells me how outraged they are that I claim to speak for all gays cuz you don’t speak for me.

  180. cicely. Just cicely. says

    Hi, soul_biscuit; welcome in!

    *many hugs* and *fluffy, romping kittens* for keenacat.

    Ye Olde Blacksmith, happy anniversary! *champagne*

    Ally ain’t just a river in egypt…

    Ally ain’t even a river in egypt.
    -

  181. QueQuoiHuh says

    …just to clarify, really good home-made cookies, not snark cookies.

  182. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Congarats to Blacksmith!!

    15 is a significant chunk of time. I’m glad you’ve had that together…

  183. says

    Blacksmith:

    The label of “ally” should be granted by the group/cause/persons. It should not be taken by oneself.

    Yeah. Kind of like Mafia and similar nicknames.

    Also, happy anniversary!

    Jennifer:

    Oh, for fuck’s sake, he’s doubling down on how I’m just one of those hysterical bitches who can’t take a good rape analogy when I see one.

    Not enough Picard facepalms in the universe.

    I would make mine “Queen Cunt of Fuck Mountain,” but I don’t want to steal from Melissa McEwan.

    I wouldn’t want to steal anything that was so easily identified with that high-speed failtrain.

    David M., “Michèle” is a valid spelling alternative in French of “Michelle.” You can’t expect us Amurkins to use them fancy diarrhetical marks, tho.

    Lynna:

    the U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Boston has declared the Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional.

    Excellent. Also, that Five Husbands ad? UNF UNF UNF UNF UNF.

    JT, as quoted by RahXephon:

    The hostility to people doing their best to understand, the accusations of darker motives that the commenter couldn’t possibly know (see Coyote and those like him), make me not want to write about this subject again (and I probably won’t).

    Oh noes!! ;__; How shall we overcome without Brave Ally JT at our side?!

    Keena, I’m glad you’re feeling better.

    Pteryxx:

    I stand by my completely unscientific wild guess that JT has about a 15% chance of showing signs of “he gets it” three months hence.

    Sorry, I’ve been less and less inclined to agree with that as this clusterfuck has continued to unfold.

    Audley, I agree with Caine at #228. As for ridiculous names, what are your parameters? I mean, it should be something that Darkfetus can live happily with…

    TLC, congrats for joining JT’s Enemies List. You’re in good company. :D

    Welcome, QueQuoiHuh. But don’t go back to lurking full-time!

    Josh:

    Pterryx, which comment where? I was polite? Need to remedy that, stat.

    I LOL’ed.

  184. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    QueQuoiHuh:

    Welcome to the Horde. Please delurk anytime!

  185. Predator Handshake says

    Janine, you clearly don’t appreciate slowly-building drum fills as much as I do (and I hope there’s not something other than aesthetics that I’ve missed that makes you hate the song). I know it’s corny, but keep in mind that I listen to stuff like Manowar on purpose all the time. And I like it.

  186. Pteryxx says

    Ms Daisy Cutter: re JT, I didn’t mean ‘15% chance of decent human being’ as a compliment. ~;>

    I’ll be, mostly, warily watching his blog from a distance. The best I can say is the sight of his initials only makes me physically sick about half the time.

  187. QueQuoiHuh says

    @ Ms. Daisy Cutter and Crip Dyke,
    I still have some work cut out for me, getting my fangs all nice and sniny, but I’ll be here reading… and throwing down more often now that I am well and truly aware of how rampant the shit is even within the “FTB ranks”
    Thanks to both of you for the welcome.

  188. says

    Daisy:
    Oh no, I’m not considering giving Darkfetus a ridiculous name, just changing the list until Mr Darkheart is actually willing to compromise. (It’s a little petty, but fuck it. I’m annoyed as all hell.)

    I haven’t come up with too many ridiculous names yet, just Mortimer and Gilbert for a boy and Ethel* for a girl.

    *Ethel was one of my great-grandmamas. She was an awful, abusive person. Mr Darkheart knows this.

  189. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Hahaha, I love how he keeps referencing me in the thread. It’s like someone’s throwing me a party and I’m not invited!

    He appears to be spending an increasingly ridiculous amount of effort on doubling down. He’s starting to remind me of those limpets I used to occasionally gather from tidepools (tough but delicious) back in my seaside days.

  190. Pteryxx says

    Yeah, I know, but you’re still an optimist. :P

    I know, I know, I’m an extreme outlier in the good-faith department. I like to think that’s why my kind is (mostly) extinct.

    (rambling even worse)

    I’m totally exhausted, but this is I think the biggest crop of emerging lurkers and people reconsidering their positions (big names excepted) that I’ve ever seen in one of these scuffles, going back to PZ’s Woman Problem post in 2010.

    …Oh frick. THE WOMAN PROBLEM discussion thread must’ve been deleted, too.

    *sobs*

  191. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    I wouldn’t want to steal anything that was so easily identified with that high-speed failtrain.

    For what it’s worth, Shakesville used to be way different. I started reading it way back in high school (2004-ish, for reference) and it…well, I wouldn’t say it was as open as Pharyngula is, but fuck-ups were definitely understood to happen. I was a stupid teen and screwed up a lot, I had several actual fights with Melissa, and I was never banned. That site is the reason I’m even involved in feminism and all that now; it did a lot to shape my political ideas, too, back when the blog was still a general-politics-with-feminism-too type blog.

    But something happened, some big drama where the blog almost closed, and it’s been really weird over there ever since. I pretty much only see regulars posting because new people are frequently banned, either with one warning (and by “warning” I mean the very next post you make better be “OMG I’m so sorry!” or you’re gone) or you insta-ban.

    I rarely read now and never comment.

  192. says

    The secret to naming a child is to watch some random old TV rerun earlier in the day of the birth, and then choose the name of one of the actors arbitrarily while in the car rushing to the delivery.
    It worked for me, and everyone (including my daughter, now an adult) was and is happy with the name.
    It might be hard, though, to find a station still showing Petticoat Junction, so you’ll probably need to watch a different stupid old show.

  193. kerfluffle says

    If anyone is interested, there was a thread on the JREF forum about harassment at TAM and elsewhere. I really don’t recommend reading it. It is very long. 99% elevatorgate Watson-punishing and “bitches be trippin!” bullshit. Guaranteed to cause rage.

    http://forums.randi.org/showthread.php?t=214158&highlight=TAM+harassment

    Aside from the apologetics there are mentions of upskirt photography, a guy forcing his tongue into the mouths of several women, and guys getting women drunk and escorting them to their rooms. Also scattered links to women reporting harassment through email or facebook after TAM.

    It’s easy to see how DJ could have missed this. Nobody reads the entire forums. But it’s weird that none of the mods brought the worst of it to JREF’s attention.

  194. Louis says

    Audley, #250,

    Shi’thead (pronounced “Shuh-theeed”)

    Asshole (pronounced “Ahsholay”)

    Abcde (pronounced “Absiday”)

    Hat Tip to Lewis Black.

    Louis

  195. QueQuoiHuh says

    RahXephon @ 274

    I chalk it up to being a defense mechanism on the part of Lis, Deeky and others, but I see what you’re saying. It’s why I definitely prefer Pharyngula.

  196. says

    Rachel Maddow covers Romney’s claim that his private sector experience made him the perfect candidate to be Governor of Massachusetts, same claim he is making for his run for the Presidency.
    There are just a few problems with that claim, it has been proven false.

    It’s infinitely easier to make this more straightforward case: Romney was an ineffective, unsuccessful, and unpopular governor who quit after one term, so don’t make him president. He promised to use his business know-how to create jobs, but failed miserably — Massachusetts’ job creation record during Romney’s term was “one of the worst in the country,” ranking 47th out of 50 states.

    More text, plus interesting short video: http://maddowblog.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/05/31/11991707-pivoting-from-bain-to-the-bay-state

  197. says

    Feralboy,
    That was pretty much how my mom named my older sister. She was watching All My Children when she went into labor.

    Louis,
    Aaah, is the any problem that Lewis Black can’t solve?

    (As an aside, Mr DarkheartThe Great Poo Monster saw Louis Black perform once when he was in college. Apparently, LB tossed out his whole set in order to make fun of the school ‘cos it was “Spam night” in the cafeteria.)

  198. Pteryxx says

    re kerfluffle:

    It’s easy to see how DJ could have missed this. Nobody reads the entire forums. But it’s weird that none of the mods brought the worst of it to JREF’s attention.

    The folks on the ground, responsible for enforcing/carrying out the harassment policy (or moderation policy) are subject to the same concerns about having THEIR reports dismissed, or their actions disavowed, as the actual victims are. Going against the flow ONLY works with explicit, demonstrable support from the top.

    (I’m burned out, add brilliant editing as necessary)

  199. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    I chalk it up to being a defense mechanism on the part of Lis, Deeky and others, but I see what you’re saying. It’s why I definitely prefer Pharyngula.

    I think I agree with the assessment others have made, that Shakesville really only exists for Melissa, Deeky, and her friends, and the commenters are kinda secondary. It seems like they’ve taken a private online group for friends and turned it into a blog. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but they don’t make that clear.

  200. QueQuoiHuh says

    Lynna @ 280
    Thanks for the link.
    In return, I offer these rewritten lyrics to “Pumped Up Kick”s by Foster the People:

    Romney’s got a quick hand.
    He’s lookin’ ’round for votes,
    He won’t tell you his plan.
    He’s got a red etch-a-sketch
    Hanging outta his hand.
    He’s a confused kid.

    Yeah! He found a tri-ckle-down gun
    and it’s his turn now, ’cause Jospeh Smith said so, son.
    He don’t even know what,
    but he’s coming for you. Yeah, He’s coming for you!

    All the middle class with the decent jobs,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All the single moms who are struggling,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

    All the gays and lesbians wanna get married,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All the immigrants with a brand new life,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

    Mitty works a long day.
    He ain’t worked in years, firin’ those that he hates.
    And he’s bringing you a surprise.
    ’cause Bain is in your business and it’s slice and dice

    He’s waited for a long time.
    Yeah the sleight of his hand is now a quick-pull trigger.
    His reasons are an etch-a-sketch,
    He says, “Dog’s on the roof, he must have liked his ride, yeah?”

    All the people sick with no insurance,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All the working poor with a payday loan,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

    All the elderly who need Medicare,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All the veterans with a broken life,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

    (Run, Run, Run, Run. Run, Run.
    Run, Run, Run.)

    (whistle)

    All the pacifists who are against war,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All minorities who want civil rights,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

    All underwaters with their foreclosures,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All the parents who are for their kid’s future,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

    All the small farmers for organic crops,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All the Atheists, who don’t want to burn,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

    All the single women who don’t want marriage,
    You better vote, better vote, outvote his gun.
    All the scientists who are for research,
    You better vote, better vote, faster than his bullet.

  201. Louis says

    Audley,

    OH WOW! I has TEH ENVY! Tell Mr Darkheart “I’m not worthy! I’m not worthy!”.

    What worries me is how much of Lewis Black’s act is identical to my every day internal monologue. What worries me more is that is not humorous hyperbole. What worries me even more is that when I read a review of his “style” it said that he was like a man on the edge of a mental breakdown.

    Still, gotta laugh, eh?

    Louis

  202. Millicent says

    Hi everyone! This is my first time posting, although I’ve been a lurker for years. I think what’s made me finally come out of lurking is all the ridiculous sexist bullshit that’s happening — between JT and DJ Grothe, I am feeling very condescended to, and it’s really fucking depressing. How do y’all handle the feeling of “bleh, same shit, different day, this is never going to change.” Because right now that’s making me feel like shit, and I can’t be the only one.

    And so many thank yous to y’all who fight the good fight day after day. Here’s another lurker popping up to say that it’s not the complainers, the ones who make noise and shout and point out problems again and again, who are the problem. It’s the ones who have to be told NO who are the problem. NO we will not tolerate being harassed, NO we are not at the con (or posting online, or anything else) for your entertainment, NO we will not shut up about it.

    Thank you. I’d be a whole lot more bummed without you.

  203. says

    Audley: For a girl, go with Ermintrude. For a boy, Fulk.

    RahXephon:

    For what it’s worth, Shakesville used to be way different.

    Yeah, I used to read it semi-regularly before they fell off the cliff in 2009 with their creepy, cult-like “All In” post. (Yes, I know not everybody here agrees with me that it was creepy and cult-like, but most people who aren’t involved with SV seem to think so.) But, even back in the day, there were some fails on the part of OPs, from gender-essentialist, GLBT-stereotyping crapola to gross classism and poverty shaming.

    McEwan’s classics, like “The Terrible Bargain We Have Struck,” remain worth linking to. The “Survivor Thread” was amazing as well. The blog itself is, to me, no longer worth reading, unless someone links me there to a thread for trainwreck purposes.

    QQH: If Liss, Deeky, and other mods are going to be that “defensive,” they have no business running a major blog with a mission of being a prominent feminist voice. Their space is not safe for anybody except themselves and a handful of sycophants.

    Kerfluffle, that seems to be typical of JREF mods.

    Welcome, Millicent!

  204. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Oh Vulvalene, why can’t you be true, Vulvalene. . .

  205. Happiestsadist says

    kerfluffle@ #276: Holy shit. (Also, trigger warnings for sexual violence would be nice.) And this is why I maintain that my being a pain-wracked, mean shut-in isn’t that bad a strategy.

  206. QueQuoiHuh says

    Millicent, there seem to be quite a few of us delurking in TET due to recent shenanigans elsewhere.
    *waves*

  207. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Thank you genuinely to all the de-lurkers. You help us loudmouths, too, by giving the lie to the claim that we’re a problem minority of complainers. We need you to come out and dispute that.

  208. says

    Hello Millicent!

    Lynna,
    Ha! I forgot about the Mormon names! There’s Bridger A-10 in the boys list, do you think we could feminize that into Bridgera A-10?

    Sally,
    Marge is a little too close to a name already on The List™– Margot. But Milhouse is totes going on The Fake List™.

  209. says

    Audley:

    Anyone want to help come up with ridiculous/terrible names?

    :Gets out name book: I’ll do my best. These aren’t ridiculous per se, but seriously out of use. Okay, lots are ridiculous. I’ll start with one of my personal faves:

    For da boy types:

    Ajax-(Greek) Eagle
    Asgrim-(Icelandic) divine wrath
    Balbo-(Latin) the stammerer
    Baldric (Teutonic) ruling prince
    Cadwallader-(Celtic) war arranger
    Dandie-(Greek) man
    Narcissus-(Greek) to put to sleep
    Urien-(Greek) the heavenly
    Vivian-(Latin) to live
    Waldo-(Old High German) to wield
    Xenos-(Greek) the stranger
    Zadok-(Hebrew) the just or righteous
    Zurr-(Hebrew) the rocklike

    For da girl types:

    Aglaia-(Greek) the splendid
    Arthurine-(Welsh) the noble or high
    Bathilda-(Teutonic) bright battle maid
    Birdesmond-(Teutonic) bird protector
    Calypso-(Greek) I conceal
    Damita-(Latin) little lady
    Gasparde-(French feminine of the Persian Jasper) treasure queen
    Huberta-(Old High German) bright of mind
    Myrtle-(Latin) the myrtle
    Odelet-(Greek) a lyric song
    Quendrida-(Scandinavian) dread queen (In fairness, I did name a car this)
    Veta-(Latin) the vetoed
    Winifred-(Teutonic) friend of peace

  210. QueQuoiHuh says

    No Josh, Thank you.
    You have helped me to truly grasp that my anger is important, and that I need to give it a fucking voice. Because, if I continue to be complacent and silent, then I am no better than…
    Well, let’s just say that in the JT shitcake thread, you, Ms. Daisy Cutter, carlie and TLC have given me my Martin Niemöller moment.

  211. keenacat says

    Aww, my granny was named Hildegard.
    But I’ve got two other horrendous suggestions.
    When I was still leetle, we had neighbours that had named their son and daughter “Erdmann” and “Erdmute”, respectively. “Erd-” can be translated as “soil” (even though this was almost certainly not the linguistic root of these names), so he was called “soilman”, while she was called “soil-(very out of date female name ending)”.

  212. says

    I don’t know where else to dump this, so I’ll dump it here because fuckall, this weight on my shoulders has gotten exhausting.

    So, I mentioned in an earlier thread that I had my first child at nineteen and that there are custody issues. The quick-and-dirty is that I let my ex’s parents keep him for nearly a year (part of it unplanned) while I worked out my discharge from the military. I got discharged and was nearly broke, and then my ex’s parents came in the middle of the night to kidnap my son without my knowing about it until it was too late. I was young, I didn’t have a hell of a lot of education, I had pretty much no money and no resources, and I wasn’t sure if the cops would help me, so I didn’t call them.

    This resulted in my ending up across the country and my ex having primary custody. Whatever. It was jesus-terrible for me, but he was healthy and stable (after he finally moved out of my ex’s parents’ place, but that’s a whole other story). I’ve seen him once a year for maybe two weeks, max, for the past five years.

    He just ended up with my ex’s parents again, without my consent, for the past six months, and I challenged for custody. My ex was surprisingly agreeable, and we have paperwork signed, but now my ex’s emotionally abusive and deeply religious parents are trying to challenge for custody of my son. I will probably get him, but this feels exactly like it did five years ago: I’m ready and able to take him to a place where he will be stable and won’t be indoctrinated or manipulated, and then they are going to jump in and snatch him away because he is property to them. He isn’t to me.

    They have also been incredibly abusive to my ex since we reached an agreement on a parenting plan, and it’s mostly because they are deeply bigoted against my ex on one particular axis of marginalization (I’m not going into it here). I’m very worried, not only that I won’t get custody, but that my son will end up staying with these abusive, bigoted fundamentalists. And I feel so powerless again.

    No one can do anything, and they probably won’t succeed, but even the chance is enough. I’m also afraid that they will try to hide him when we come to pick him up. I’m a complete wreck right now because my son is with these terrible people who hate both me and my ex and have already had a few years to indoctrinate him so that he maybe won’t grow up to be some godless homo tranny whore scum like his parents. (Between us we fill those categories as far as they are concerned.) I’m worried that they will have poisoned the well further, because I know that they have badmouthed me and told him that we would never let him see them again if he came here (which is a lie, even if they are terrible people). I’m generally terrified of, at best, what they have done to him in my absence and, at worst, what will happen if I lose anyway.

    And it’s just like standing there five years ago, knowing that they were on their way to take him away. I’m deeply tired of this, and I just want it to be over and for him to be in our car because we love him. I can’t be excited about getting custody of my son because they’re going to try to take him away again.

    Okay.

  213. Millicent says

    Hi, and thank you for all the welcomes! I feel as though I said pretty much what QueQuoiHuh said upthread: there is some sort of tipping point thing happening here that’s making the lurkers come out of the woodwork, because it’s just so frickin’ blatant. And yes, I am basing my totally scientific theory on my sample size of two. Heh.

    Forgive me if I have missed it (there’s a lot of posts here!) but is anyone else an MSer? I have a few people I don’t mind talking to specifically about multiple sclerosis stuff, but most of the support groups (online and IRL) are full of “this is god’s plan for me” and similar, and…yeahno. I need to talk to people who understand that we have MS because of genetic predisposition, pretty much. Oh, and bad luck. Jesus didn’t have anything to do with it, as far as I can tell. Is there anything in the bible about smiting the nervous system? A parable or suchlike? Didn’t think so.

  214. says

    skeptifem, your comments on the Fix This thread have been amazing.

    thank you so much. I have been sick recently and reading a screen usually makes it worse. I’ve been feeling better over the past week or so and its nice to know that some people like to read my stuff.

    audley at 221

    Well FUCK.

    Just got off the phone with Mr Darkheart and he totally shot Macsen down.

    Can you see my surprised face?

    *sigh* Sorry. I just feel like I’m the only person who has sacrificed the names that were truly loved, in the hope that we could reach a compomise. Come to find out, I’m the only one compromising. :-/

    you’re carrying the baby, there isn’t any compromise to that either. I think moms should have naming rights, period.

  215. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    Yeah, I used to read it semi-regularly before they fell off the cliff in 2009 with their creepy, cult-like “All In” post.

    I was an avid reader and commenter for a long time and to be honest, the past few couple of months have felt like I’m coming out of a cult. Melissa has this way of talking to you like, if you disagree with her or think she’s engaging in some kind of shitty privileged behavior, then you’re just not a Level 10 Feminist like her or something. After awhile it never occurred to me that Melissa is a straight woman with straight privilege (and other privileges) coming out the wazoo and she can act just as shitty as anyone else.

    What’s so screwy and gas-lighty about it is that the conversation over there kinda goes like this-

    Melissa: I’m a human being. I accept criticism. I fuck up. Correct me if I’m wrong!
    Commenter: Uh, okay, well, I think you appropriate gay stereotypes…
    Melissa: SHUT UP YOU BAD FAITHER! *banhammer*

    As far as the “All In” post, I barely remember what it said and nothing struck me as creepy or cult-like at the time, but I suppose if you’re in the cult then it’s not going to look out of the ordinary…

    See, that’s what I keep tripping over, is that I keep wondering if my thoughts were really my thoughts, or if they were hers. Ugh.

    QQH: If Liss, Deeky, and other mods are going to be that “defensive,” they have no business running a major blog with a mission of being a prominent feminist voice. Their space is not safe for anybody except themselves and a handful of sycophants.

    There’s a Youtuber I love named JPMetz, and at the end of each of her videos, she has “Kiss My Ass Comment Time”, where she shows comments that kissed her ass. That’s probably what Melissa should change the name of the blog to, based on the comments I usually see. “Fawning praise” is too mild to describe some of the obsequiousness I’ve witnessed.

  216. says

    What worries me even more is that when I read a review of his “style” it said that he was like a man on the edge of a mental breakdown…

    Oh, I never worry about the alarming similarities between my life and the content of standup acts…

    I always figure, hell, I’ve always had the Zen-like calm of Lewis Black, the smooth, reticent social diplomacy of Louis C.K…

    … So I also figure I can count on having a similar legacy of success to, say Louis XVI.

    (/With apologies to our local Louis. Really, I tried to work you in, there, but it just wasn’t happening.)

  217. says

    Here’s proof that all the mormon names I offer are real. That is, actual human beings were saddled with mormon names like LeVoid, Void, Sunan, Moonyene, Starlene, Sunelly, Luna, Lunia, Solinda, Sunirae, Staryl, Marandastarr, Season, Aries, Starlyn, Cressent, Celestial Starr, Summerlyn, Astrolena, Starcia, Stellar, Starvision…..or Audi, Fairlene, Celecta, Pontiac, Vonda, Vonza, Auto, Cherokee, Lexus, Porsche, Skylark, Truckston, Avis, Chevrollette, Chevonne, Caprice, Dodge, Kitura, Tirzia, Labbaron, Merzaydee…. or VulvaMae, DaLinda LaDale, Tugdick, Tosser, Saunsceneyouray, and, yes, we triple checked this one… Clitoris.

    http://wesclark.com/ubn/article.html

  218. LDTR says

    Audley: You could always just go with Darkfetus.

    “Darkfetus! Get in here NOW!”

    (teacher’s roll call) “Joshua… Amanda… Darkfetus…”

    “Ladies and gentlemen, I give you our new President of the United States, Darkfetus (last name)!”

  219. kerfluffle says

    Happiestsadist @293, Oh shit! I am so sorry. I completely fucked up. That link is full of the most vile misogyny and sexual assault and I should have mentioned that.

    There is no way to edit, I’ll be sending PZ an email asking to delete that post. No one should wander over there without warning. I am so sorry.

  220. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    @Lynna

    I wonder if all these star-soundy names have to do with their belief in Xenu God and Kolob and getting your own planet and all that nonsense. I think Mormonism is the prototypical “Space Religion”.

  221. Pteryxx says

    I just wanted to QFFNT the heck out of this by QueQuoiHuh

    No Josh, Thank you.
    You have helped me to truly grasp that my anger is important, and that I need to give it a fucking voice. Because, if I continue to be complacent and silent, then I am no better than…
    Well, let’s just say that in the JT shitcake thread, you, Ms. Daisy Cutter, carlie and TLC have given me my Martin Niemöller moment.

    This is why I thank y’all who DO get pissed off and explode in multicolored rocket flames on the clueless and malicious. I set a bad example, being as calm as I mostly am, and you all rage dancers doing your thing give me the space to come in with the cold statistics. I don’t carry the outrage flag because thanks to y’all, I don’t have to. It’s handled.

  222. keenacat says

    Oh Jennifer, that is horrible. :( *hugs all around*
    At least your ex is agreeable. I will hold all avaliable thumbs for you until your boy is safe with you.

  223. QueQuoiHuh says

    Jennifer,
    I am so sorry to hear about what you are going through.
    I wish with the strength of a thousand suns that there was something I could to help.
    I hope that is not intrusive, but I admire you so much for what you have said and how hard you have fought in the FTB threads lately.

    shorter me: FWIW, I am cheering for you.

  224. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    @Audley

    Actually, the name I had in mind for Mr. Darkheart was Dudley Q. Doodlefuck, Mayor of Notfairington. I didn’t think to include farts.

  225. carlie says

    Hello, new peoples!!! *waves*

    But, even back in the day, there were some fails on the part of OPs, from gender-essentialist, GLBT-stereotyping crapola to gross classism and poverty shaming.

    It seems to me that the fails of that type have gone way down in the last couple of years, at the same time that the commenting rules have tightened. I think the commenting tighten-up is definitely defensive, because they attract an awful lot of crap comments (occasionally they let them out and show off some, and it’s appalling). It’s basically Feminism 499 the senior seminar, and don’t even bother with questions that are below that level. I assume that some of the complaints are about arguments within feminist studies about details of philosophy and strategies that I’m simply incapable of understanding at my level, but since those criticisms are over my head I don’t notice.

  226. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    You have helped me to truly grasp that my anger is important, and that I need to give it a fucking voice.

    Anger is important and legitimate. It gets a bad rap (especially from liberals) and characterized as if it were intrinsically to be avoided. It is not. It can go overboard, but more often than not I see people calling for “civility” and saying “why you so angry” because they don’t want to deal with the problem provoking the anger. So they make anger and the blunt expression thereof “uncivil” and (the worst sin in the liberal canon) “inappropriate.”

    Fuck that.

    Shorter me: Less “It’s concerning to us that our opponents would choose to take this approach.” More, “How dare you make such a baldly bigoted statement?”

  227. Louis says

    Millicent,

    WELCOME! Thanks for delurking.

    I can tell you how I put up with the “same shit, different day”:

    Drugs. And alcohol. And drugs and alcohol. With some alcohol and drugs. And occasional filthy sex. On drugs and alcohol.

    Followed by really hard science.

    I’ve found it to be a winning formula.

    Louis

  228. says

    millicent

    Hi everyone! This is my first time posting, although I’ve been a lurker for years. I think what’s made me finally come out of lurking is all the ridiculous sexist bullshit that’s happening — between JT and DJ Grothe, I am feeling very condescended to, and it’s really fucking depressing. How do y’all handle the feeling of “bleh, same shit, different day, this is never going to change.” Because right now that’s making me feel like shit, and I can’t be the only one.

    I used to post on zuska’s blog a lot back in the day (on scienceblogs), and this douchebag would show up to every single thread on sexism to say the same shit over and over.

    About a year later he showed up to say how wrong he was and that he was sorry. I know that the majority of people who have their minds changed don’t post at all, they just read, and that most don’t remember to come back and say what happened in the mean time. When I have changed my mind completely I almost never made it back to the places where debate changed me.

    Places like pharyngula, where anti-sexism is the norm, is a difference from many years ago. Things change slowly, but they do change. When I first got involved in skeptic stuff online I had almost none of the feminist ideas I now espouse (outside of basic shit like equal pay for equal work).

    Try to make fun of the jerks, that makes it easier.

  229. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Caine:

    From that other thread:

    I’m half Oglala Lakota

    One of my good friends in the 90s was also half Oglala Lakota. She was the first lawyer that I could really like and helped set me on the path that leads me to law school now. Sadly, I only knew her about 4 years before she died.

  230. Just_A_Lurker says

    Marge is a little too close to a name already on The List™– Margot.

    I totally read that as maggot. lol

  231. Millicent says

    Ugh, Jennifer, that is a horrible situation. I wish I had something to offer better than commiseration and sympathy, but I offer those wholeheartedly.

    *waves back* to QueQuoiHuh, and seconding what zie said to Josh: I sincerely thank you for all your work. It did occur to me that allowing folks like you and Daisy and Happiestsadist and everyone else who has really *worked* to do all the heavy lifting was unfair, and so I have delurked.

    Not that it is incumbent upon lurkers to delurk, just that I felt that for *me*, it was the right choice to make.

  232. Pteryxx says

    kerfluffle: re your comment, I thought the warnings you had in place were good warnings.

    Jennifer: I have no words. *patented fluffy anklehugs*

  233. says

    314 @ lynna
    I’ve had to navigate a computer system or two based on name since I moved to utah.
    Oh my god, looking up patients by name in Utah is a fucking nightmare. The normal names are spelled weird, and there aren’t many normal names. Breklynn is one of the worst I’ve heard. BREK is an awful sound. There is a utah names website somewhere that has a huge list of weird shit.

    A shit ton of people put their first initial and middle name on everything here because their parents decided to name them something embarassing.

  234. says

    Jennifer
    I’m sorry to hear. I hope that since your Ex and you seem to agree no judge would go with the grandparents on this. It’s a shitty situation, especially since you have actual fears that they’ll try to hide him.
    My hugs for you. I know the one time my mum hinted that she’d see #1 in other ways if I didn’t come made me all determined to sue the fuck out of her if she ever tried.

  235. Cipher, OM, MQ says

    I am threadrupt. I will fix that in a second. But I just need to say that when I saw your new nym, Caine, I very nearly burst out laughing in a library reading room.
    :P

  236. cicely. Just cicely. says

    QueQuoiHuh, Millicent, welcome in!

    *huge gob of support* for Jennifer. We can’t take the weight for you, but can we at least metaphorically rub your poor, exhausted shoulders for you?
    :)
    -

  237. Ogvorbis says

    If I’ve learned one thing from this whole mess, it’s that ‘Ally’ isn’t just a label you don’t get to bestow upon yourself,

    I agree with this statement wholeheartedly. I try very, very hard (I think I have been successful) to not refer to myself as an ally to any group or cause. If I am considered an ally through my writing or activities, fine, but I have noticed that people who state, “I am an ally,” are often excusing poor behaviour which may have called that into question. I looked over at JT’s, read the defense of ‘bitch,’ and decided I was correct in deciding not to get involved. Others are dealing with the toxicity and I thank you.

    hair metal.

    Pfft. Nothing compared to Christian Hair Metal. When I was in my senior year of high school, I met my first girlfriend. She was the product of a Catholic upbringing, but had been ‘born again.’ She tried very hard to convert me, to convince me to accept Jesus as my personal saviour and be born again (I thought at the time (and still do) that the first time was most likely enough for my mom).

    The summer after my senior year (or maybe it was in the late spring (not sure (it was a long time ago))) she called me and asked if I wanted to go to a concert. Sounded good, so I said yes. She said to bring the brick (my VW Microbus was painted brick red (with a white top (looked kinda like a rectangle of Red Velvet Cake with Ermine Icing))) as ‘the gang’ (all born-agains (but good people (and (usually) fun to be with)) would be coming along.

    The concert (up at the Hagerstown fairgrounds) was Petra. There were three other bands before the headliner. For those who don’t know, Petra was a Christian Rock Band. The concert was, to say the least, excruciating. The bands were three chord wonders in spandex, with the added bonus of horrible lyrics. Songs about Gods love. Songs about Jesus’ love. Songs about the Bible’s love. Luckily, when Petra was on, I couldn’t understand the lyrics (their sound boy couldn’t quite figure out that the vocals should be at least as loud as the instrumentals (and the thumpa-thumpa-thumpa of the bass was discoesque)). Unluckily the lyrics were displayed above the stage (this was hi-tech for 1985). Luckily I had forgotten the lyrics.

    As we drove away after the concert (heading for Pizza Hut), I rumaged through the cassettes (not an eight-track in this vehicle) and popped in The Wall by Pink Floyd. Oddly, everyone in the van, all the born-agains, had the same reaction: “Ahhhh. Real music!” So why the hell did we suffer through three hours of Christian Rock?

    Should I provide links? To Stryper and Petra? Anyone? Bueller?

    QueQuoiHuh:

    Welcome. The grog is over there.

    Argh, I need to back to lurking.

    No, you don’t. Seems like every time there is a shitstorm of misogyny, there are quite a few lurkers who come out and join the horde. Many stay. And have become standout members of said horde.

  238. Just_A_Lurker says

    Forgive me if I have missed it (there’s a lot of posts here!) but is anyone else an MSer? I have a few people I don’t mind talking to specifically about multiple sclerosis stuff, but most of the support groups (online and IRL) are full of “this is god’s plan for me” and similar, and…yeahno.

    Well, unfortunately I can’t help much there. My problem is I can’t get a diagnosis despite all the signs and symptoms. I can listen, relate and understand what your going through, just not treatment wise.

  239. says

    Names: My maternal grandmother was named Zola, after the author. And my father’s middle name was Merlin. Two great names that don’t get used often enough.

  240. QueQuoiHuh says

    @318
    Pteryxx,
    Over the past year, you have been an extraordinary example for someone like me, who is by nature, not very confrontational. Do not let anyone ever make you think that that the strength of cold hard steel is anything less than the fury of a bonfire.
    It just so happens that my fire is burning white-hot at the moment, and I needed to shoot out a few sparks in deference to those whose fangs are sharper and whose coats are more sniny than mine.

  241. Pteryxx says

    random lurker history: I was skimming Pharyngula when the Woman Problem post came around; that was my introduction. During Elevatorga- err, Incident, I started actually commenting to help carry the load, because I saw how few and outnumbered were the voices calling out the loads of obvious BS.

    The BS detectors were rented from Carl Sagan and road-tested in various anti-evolution arguments. Thanks all.

  242. kerfluffle says

    Pteryxx @329. Given the grossness of that JREF thread they are not adequate. If you don’t know about the JREF forums, you might not be prepared for how vile they are. I don’t want anyone to be hurt by my carelessness.

    Plus I just gave Jason Thibeault a ration of shit for the same thing. To make the same mistake is inexcusable and embarrassing.

  243. carlie says

    Oh, Jennifer. I also think that if your ex has your back, and it’s clear that the grandparents are mean to both of you, that everything will go ok. But crap, that’s a lot to deal with.

  244. Pteryxx says

    *blushsquirm* Aww, thanks QQH.

    I’m trying really hard to learn (internally) that rage can be a good and worthy tool. I don’t think one is better than the other; but my calmness lets me slip a blade in places that the fiery frontliners can’t reach. Conversely, I’m not a good example for teaching anyone else how to reclaim their anger; and that’s really important when people are being oppressed.

  245. QueQuoiHuh says

    Pteryxx @ 342
    “my calmness lets me slip a blade in places that the fiery frontliners can’t reach”
    *smiles wickedly and send you the beverage of your choice*
    (apologies for lack of html knowledge)

  246. Pteryxx says

    bah, and I forgot re anger: Several lurkers have come forward and said specifically that *the outrage* with which they were treated, or others with similar ideas, was a factor in changing their minds. I meant to point out that cold facts are definitely not the best or only way to fight bias.

  247. Predator Handshake says

    Ogvorbis: when I was in 9th grade, my youth pastor was staying with me while my parents were out of town (this was much less creepy than it probably sounds; he was a good guy and I considered him a friend first outside the “professional” capacity). He took me to whatever store I bought CD’s from back then, and I bought Iron Maiden’s Number of the Beast. I was surprised when he didn’t make a fuss over me buying such a thing; he basically told me “devil worship was cool in the 80’s metal scene, just be careful not to take it too seriously.” Years later I would figure out that Maiden was never about devil worship that much in the first place, but I think he was just talking about metal in general.

    Anyway, the next time I had a birthday he told me he had a surprise for me. He was wearing this cheeky grin as he pulled from behind his back a cassette tape of Stryper’s To Hell With the Devil. It was awful, despite having some surprisingly rad album art. It became sort of a running joke between us to sing stuff from it, and it always struck me as interesting that a person from my church would not only admit that Christians are capable of producing terrible music, but also make fun of them relentlessly for it.

  248. says

    jennifer- I bet the court will be pissed off too, they usually are when wankers waste their time with this kind of bullshit. Do you know what grounds they are trying to gain custody on? I don’t really understand what their problem officially could be, outside of their having custody for awhile.

  249. Pteryxx says

    …d’awww. I get picturesque when I’m tired.

    *crumples into a little soot-ball of blush*

  250. Beatrice says

    I have an Ilijana in the family. I rather like the name, although I would take the j out and leave it as Iliana.

  251. says

    Audley, there’s always the list of Catholic saints. Just from the A-C lists: Alkeld, Anianus, Bean, Blinlivet, Bononius, Budoc, Carpus, Censurius, Comodus, Cucuphas.

    Gamers of a certain age should take note that there is also a St. Tron.

    Jennifer, that situation sucks so hard. I don’t know what to say. I wonder if there are any legal resources for atheists that could help you?

    RahXephon, a friend of a friend who was actually raised in a cult and will always suffer from PTSD spoke up in that thread to say they were triggered by it.

    Lynna: “LeVoid”? If you gaze into his eyes, does he gaze back at you?

    Carlie:

    It’s basically Feminism 499 the senior seminar, and don’t even bother with questions that are below that level.

    Feminism 499 wouldn’t be this insensitive to trans commenters unless it were run by radscum.

    Josh, #323: Heartily seconded. And what’s fascinating to me is that we Americans live in a country in which right-wing anger is welcomed and celebrated and encouraged, but the spineless mewlers of the “center” and what passes for “the left” here focus only on the justified sort.

    Og:

    Nothing compared to Christian Hair Metal.

    I kinda like Stryper’s version of “Battle Hymn of the Republic.” But for teh lolz.

  252. Predator Handshake says

    Also, Jennifer @336: I won’t give you much of a hard time seeing that you’ve already got enough of one on your plate, but I REALLY could have done without reading the name of that song ever again. It’s amazing how you can go without thinking of something for years, and the tiniest exposure to that thing brings it all back. The video, that annoying chorus, I’m gonna have to cleanse myself with some Morbid Angel or something on the way home from work now!

  253. Louis says

    QueQuoiHuh,

    Also Welcome to you too!

    I am bad with welcomes, I forget. So forgive me if I’ve neglected this to this point or done it twice or something.

    Louis

  254. Richard Austin says

    Fair warning: This will likely make you angry.

    “I’ve been saying it for a long time, I will not hire an assistant coach until I’ve seen his wife. If she looks the part, and she’s a D-I recruit (one of the nation’s best-of-the-best), then you got a chance to get hired. That’s part of the deal.”

    So where did Franklin acquire all the Manswers? Well, from the movie “Moneyball” in which a scout quips: “Ugly girlfriend means no confidence.”

  255. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    RahXephon, a friend of a friend who was actually raised in a cult and will always suffer from PTSD spoke up in that thread to say they were triggered by it.

    And I’m sure their comment was either ignored or blocked. I’ve actually seen them even make fun of the “Shakesville = cult” comparison before in the comment sections. Yeah, the idea that the behavior of the blog’s writers and mods could be psychologically manipulative or abusive is a real giggle-fest.

    I’ve spent the last…I’m not sure, hour?, reading the Shakesfail tumblr and all the sites linked to it, and the more I read the more it’s clearing out the cobwebs. Thanks for linking it here.

    As far as my earlier comments about it being like a cult…I wasn’t trying to say that it is or is not a cult. Not ever having been in an actual cult, I don’t really know how to judge nor did I intend to minimize the experience of people in actual cults by comparing a blog to that, so I’m sorry.

    I would still say that the environment there is toxic and manipulative, though.

  256. QueQuoiHuh says

    @344
    Pteryxx,
    I am a pacifist and non-confrontational by nature, and there is a lot that people like us can do.
    But I am sick and fucking tired of the awful bullshit that so many people go through. I am so fucking incandescently angry right now, that we still live in a society where our “allies” can tell us what to think and when we can say it… and how “civil” we must be. Fuck them.
    I am sure that at some point, I will go back to being a quiet, non-confrontational lurker, but not right now. Right now, my anger is righteous (if I may) and anyone who wants to marginalize women, gays/lesbians, transfolk, racial minorities, et al. any more than they already are has one more person standing up against them.
    These assholes (JT, DJ, etc.) already got over the whole “religion” thing. The fact that they can’t over the last hurdle is ridiculous. I plan to prod them with torches and pitchforks until they do get over it.
    *whittles another stick to a sharp point and checks her pitch buckets*

  257. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    Also, I thought I was fine with threaded comments until I started reading these threads on JT’s blog and OMG I HATE THREADED COMMENTS *firebreath*

  258. Millicent says

    Just_A_Lurker@335: I am so sorry. Being stuck without a diagnosis is horrible. Do you have sensory symptoms, but no lesions on MRI and an “inconclusive” spinal tap? I’ve known several people in this boat, it’s awful (i managed to get a diagnosis right away, because my brain is full of scars. Tons of ‘em. The brain’s plasticity is truly fascinating — mine has had to do all sorts of rewiring, it appears). Of course, most of the treatment options don’t actually do anythng, so…yeah. Argh. My sympathy to you. :)

  259. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Whenever I hear “Brek” I think:

    Brekekekek croax croax

    The dangers of an education….

    In the meantime: Welcome Millicent! My best friend’s car is named “Millie” short for “Millenium Car” (which was derived from the Keith Secola song of the same name, but also, as it was the first hybrid car in the US and of the first model year of that car, which was 2000, had other intended associations).

    Suffice it to say I have good associations with the name Millie and, though Millie was a car and did not derive the name from Millicent, for some reason ever since we got our cars (we both bough 2000 Honda Insights, mine is named “Paragon” after a red-wearing superhero…and the example I hoped the car would set) I’ve had a soft spot for the name Millicent.

    ==========
    Jennifer, there’s only so much we can do here, but we’ll do everything any thread-friend can do. If it gets to where you need more than that, some of us might even be in your area…

  260. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Woman walking in the middle of the street outside Chez SpokesGay, venting at “Johnny” who is on the sidewalk:

    Fuckin’ mail. I ain’t sharing my fuckin’ mail. Fucking Caroline and shit.

    Johnny, get out of the shower someone’s hear to see you fucker!”

    I think this may be the woman who lives next door to my friends K and J. When they go to bed at night they can hear her instructing her husband on what fucking is:

    You call that fuckin’? That ain’t fuckin’. I’ll show you some fuckin’! I’ll show you what fuckin’ is! Ah yeah, now that’s some fuckin’!

  261. Millicent says

    Hi, Crip Dyke! I like “Millie” too! Both “Millie” and “Millicent” have very positive connotations for me, for long and boring reasons, but I’m glad to see that I’m not the only one.

    RahXephon, I am right there with you on threaded comments. They are awful. AWFUL.

  262. says

    Predator @350: Sorry to song-bomb! Just, I grew up with Petra, and I can at least give them a little credit for loving some terrible non-Christian music now, like Jet Black Stare’s Ready To Roll. DON’T JUDGE. (I’ve also got a blog that is dedicated to semiotic analysis of random music, albeit mostly pop, and I am seriously considering making this the summer of Contemporary Christian, mostly from the nineties since that’s what I was raised on. This Means War would be one that I would use on the point of the martial tone of Christian rhetoric, along with others.)

    Ms. Daisy Cutter: I’ve already paid an attorney who is lovely, and we haven’t mentioned religion as part of it, and will decline to for as long as possible, for obvious reasons. Although courts couldn’t legally punish us for being atheists (both parents and my husband as well), they could still do so and make a headache. Neither of us (me be-tatted and atheist and flamingly progressive, my ex trans* an atheist) are in a position to make a lot of stink with the courts over anything that we don’t have to, and particularly not in opposition to Good Christians[TM]. Sigh.

    skeptifem: They had temporary guardianship for a bit, but it’s not even valid because I never gave consent, never signed it, and they never looked for me, so the agreement doesn’t count. Flat out. I don’t think that the courts will have much patience, either, because bio parents have preference in all states (that’s right, states involved in this problem), but you never know.

    Thanks, everyone. It looks like we might have staved off a battle by making some concessions, but I am really sick with this pit of anxiety that they planted in my stomach. We can’t afford to spend a ton more money, and they could potentially run us through a legal rigmarole that could take us outside of our means. And it’s just fucking cruel. They do it for power; they lost power over their own child, so they want power over mine, and they are willing to completely disregard my entire side of the family and their daughter (whom they still treat as their son, when they treat her at all) in order to keep it. Whatever serious problems I have had with my ex, I would never, ever consider treating her the way that they have, and I am absolutely furious that these abusive bigots think that they should have any rights to the child whom they kidnapped from me five years ago. They took my child and they’re turning him into a Christbot in order to save him from his own parents.

    Fuck.

  263. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Millicent:

    Not an MSer, but my sister is. Don’t know what good or not that is.

    On the other hand, there are quite a few people here that deal with significant disability and while etiology may be different, there often are significant commonalities. Feel free to speak generally and those with something helpful to say will say it.

  264. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Crip Dyke, is it wrong that every time I see your name I hear Crypt Dyke™ and think of the pre-installed lesbian that comes free with each mausoleum purchase?

  265. QueQuoiHuh says

    @333 cicely,
    Thanks for the welcome!

    @334 Ogvorbis,
    Thanks for directions to the grog table… it was a huge perk in luring me into the Pharyngula comments. ;)

    @351 Louis,
    Thanks! You have made me side-splittingly laugh out loud more times than I could ever truly thank you for.

    @353 RahXephon,
    I always adored Shakesville. While I don’t feel as welcome there as in days past, I’m going to chalk up to my anger. I’m still giving Liss the benefit of the doubt in terms of her defense mechanisms. Not that you have to at all, just my 2 cents.

  266. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    @Josh

    I don’t know if I would laugh or be disturbed by hearing such things from my neighbors, but then again everywhere I’ve lived my neighbors were apparently Twilight Sparklepires who were too busy with their moping schedules to go outside and bug me.

  267. Beatrice says

    Threaded comments count as a cruel and unusual punishment and should be forbidden.

    Hi, Millicent.

  268. Mattir says

    Jennifer – there are several people on TET (and on the Facebook spin-off group, which you just have to express interest in to be invited to join) with experience in child custody and mental health issues. It’s a horrible situation to be in, and we will support you however we can.

    ***
    Can we start a club of people who’ve been banned from other blogs? I was actually pretty upset when Laden banned me over disagreeing with him politely but persistently, but now I see that it’s an honor, since so many of the folks I have brain-crushes on have also been banned there and elsewhere in FtB. I think I’ll swipe the buttonmaker from work and cook up a spiffy design to reward folks who argue their way to bannination for being One of Those Rude People From Pharyngula™.

    ***
    Today is the anniversary of my emergence from the in-utero environment. I got a porch swing to mount on the kids’ old swing set (which is amazingly solid), 2 ounces of merino-cashmere blend, an ounce of camel down, and a mug with sheep on it, My present to myself (besides continuing work on setting up my new studio space) was to go to a hardware store and buy some massively huge anvil loppers, some plexiglass to cut and use for shibori, and a pair of miniature vice grips because everyone needs those (or at least that’s what I told myself when I grabbed them from the checkout impulse purchase display rack…).

    I’m gonna spend some time spinning and dealing with people being wrong on the Internet. Dinner will be grilled ribeyes and cheesecake from a French bakery. What else could I possibly want?

    (Well, I could want what Evil SonSpawn pranked me with last night – he told me he’d planned a surprise Pharyngula Horde party. I got totally excited, and he ended up feeling so horrid I thought he might cry. NEXT YEAR there will be a Horde party…)

  269. Ogvorbis says

    I feel very manly man right now. About a half-hour ago, I, using a rubber band, and from a distance of about 30cm, killed a large hornet. [smells armpits] Manly!

    (The manly-man part is a joke, but I really did just take down an airborne hornet using a small yellow rubberband. Do you call that job satisfaction? ‘Cause I don’t. I think I’ll just go stand in a corner and rust.])

    Blinlivet

    [blink] Patron saint of whisky?

    ——–

    Millicent (and any and all other delurkers): Welcome. We worship at the ftee or Tpyos.

    No, really, we do. Honets.

  270. Predator Handshake says

    Jennifer: I would be very interested in reading that. Obviously you’ll have to mention DC Talk’s Jesus Freak period, but what else did you have in mind? The Newsboys’ Big Top tour or whatever it was called (and whose music I still enjoy today just for the music itself)? Perhaps Audio Adrenaline, who were my favorite band during middle school due to lack of exposure to “real” alternative?

  271. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    Can we start a club of people who’ve been banned from other blogs? I was actually pretty upset when Laden banned me over disagreeing with him politely but persistently, but now I see that it’s an honor, since so many of the folks I have brain-crushes on have also been banned there and elsewhere in FtB.

    Aww, do you mean me? *bats eyes*

    Nah, I’m kidding. I don’t post enough to deserve brain-crushes.

    However, getting an OM is pretty much the only thing on my bucket list at the moment…

  272. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    And there you were, saying you wouldn’t become part of the Horde, Jennifer. We have our ways, as you say.

    Happy Moist Expulsion-versary, Mattir!

  273. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @Josh 364:

    is it wrong that every time I see your name I hear Crypt Dyke™

    Crypt Dyke™: The Fake Wife for your AfterLife!

  274. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    I always adored Shakesville. While I don’t feel as welcome there as in days past, I’m going to chalk up to my anger. I’m still giving Liss the benefit of the doubt in terms of her defense mechanisms. Not that you have to at all, just my 2 cents.

    Oh, reading the posts is probably fine. It’s mainly the attitudes and behaviors of the writers/mods in the comments that bother me. (I don’t know if you comment as well, just sayin’.)

  275. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Crypt Dyke™: The Fake Wife for your AfterLife!

    Oh. My. God. I fucking heart the hearting fuck out of you.

  276. carlie says

    Happy birthday, Mattir!!! We should include a birthday cake at Rhinebeck for everyone for the year. :)

    Jennifer – I grew up on 80s Christian rock. Michael W. Smith, awwwww yeah. Hopefully your legal counsel will focus a lot on the grandparents poisoning the well wrt both of you as parents; going after the religious thing is likely to backfire somewhere like Texas, but badmouthing his own parents? That’s just not done.

    When they go to bed at night they can hear her instructing her husband on what fucking is:

    The first apartment my spouse and I had, the people in the next one over had their bed up against the other side of the same wall ours was up against. They had a headboard. And their bed, um, moved a lot. It was pretty funny. We got to where we could time pretty well how long the thumping would last.

    The trans post was a huge fail at Shakesville, but I learned a lot from it. I think Melissa did too, after it all. It was one of the first feminist blogs I read, and I have a real soft spot for it and for Melissa, so I might overlook some things that other people could rightly be pissed off at. I don’t comment there much any more or even read comments because I don’t have the time, but I do read the OPs and get a lot of political info that way.

  277. Mattir says

    Jennifer – email me at Mattir dot om at Verizon dot net with your FB name and I will add you to the group. We made it an unsearchable “secret” group after a couple of trolling fiascos, but it’s basically just the same argumentative people who post here, only with (mostly) real names and some cellphone #s.

  278. carlie says

    Obviously you’ll have to mention DC Talk’s Jesus Freak period,

    OMG YOU GUYS I TOTALLY SAW THEM BEFORE THEY GOT BIG. Like, college circuit but performing at churches before they got big. Oh yeah, I got all the cred.

    *nods*

    That’s right.

  279. QueQuoiHuh says

    @368
    Mattir,
    “Can we start a club of people who’ve been banned from other blogs?”
    Damn, makes me wish I’d come out of my shell in time to really start some shit online.
    *cracks knuckles*
    Happy anniversary on your emergence from the womb day.

  280. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Damn, makes me wish I’d come out of my shell in time to really start some shit online.

    Girl, there’s always time to start some shit up in here.

  281. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @Mattir:

    Happy Belly Button Day!

    @Josh:

    :blush:

  282. QueQuoiHuh says

    Crypt Dyke™
    If you’re leading the next Zombie Apocalypse, sign me up.

  283. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    I know that in the states it’s a bit late for brunch, but I like brunch for lunch, I’m at home today, and I’m eating late:

    Hash as base
    Tofu marinated in hot sesame oil, a small dab of peanut, and raspberry vinegar
    1 medium tomato
    2 large crimini mushrooms
    1 small-medium carrot
    1 gypsy pepper
    1 serrano pepper
    4 cloves of garlic
    fresh basil

    cooked in mostly olive oil with a little hot sesame added to bring it together.

  284. says

    Cipher:

    I just need to say that when I saw your new nym, Caine, I very nearly burst out laughing in a library reading room.
    :P

    You may thank Ms. Daisypants for that one. :D

    QueQuoiHuh:

    It just so happens that my fire is burning white-hot at the moment, and I needed to shoot out a few sparks in deference to those whose fangs are sharper and whose coats are more sniny than mine.

    If you’d like a little chewing session on a dyed-in-the-wool idiot, amble over to TZT. You’re looking for an assclown goes by rajkumar.

    Millicent, upon finding out that I actually had the noive to arrive on the planet female, my father wanted to name me Mildred. I didn’t get that, I got a name I loathe, Virginia. I would have *adored* Mildred, because I simply would have shortened it to Dred.

  285. QueQuoiHuh says

    @383
    Josh,
    For personal issues, I was feeling like it was too late (for me anyway).
    Thanks for letting me know that it’s never too late to start some shit up in anywhere.
    *sends Josh a tasty USB dessert* (as an ex-pastry-chef)

  286. says

    skeptifem:

    you’re carrying the baby, there isn’t any compromise to that either. I think moms should have naming rights, period.

    Thanks. I needed to hear that. :)

    RahXephon:

    Dudley Q. Doodlefuck, Mayor of Notfairington

    *snortle!*

    I actually giggled at that!

    JAL:

    I totally read that as maggot. lol

    o.O

    Daisy:

    Audley, there’s always the list of Catholic saints.

    Oh, naming a kid after a saint would please Mr Darkheart’sDudley Q. Doodlefuck, Mayor of Notfairington’s family so much. And it would be totally evil to make him believe that I would do it…

    … MWAH HA HA HA HA!

    Josh:

    “Fuckin’ mail. I ain’t sharing my fuckin’ mail. Fucking Caroline and shit. “

    Johnny, get out of the shower someone’s hear to see you fucker!””

    I got one better: As we speak, there’s a dude on one of the fourth floor rooms of the Y (right behind my apartment building) yelling and swearing at himself for reporting his phone stolen to the police. At first, I thought there was someone else in there with him, but no dice.

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MATTIR!
    *sparkles!* *confetti!* *candy!*

  287. Just_A_Lurker says

    Just_A_Lurker@335: I am so sorry. Being stuck without a diagnosis is horrible. Do you have sensory symptoms, but no lesions on MRI and an “inconclusive” spinal tap? I’ve known several people in this boat, it’s awful (i managed to get a diagnosis right away, because my brain is full of scars. Tons of ‘em. The brain’s plasticity is truly fascinating — mine has had to do all sorts of rewiring, it appears). Of course, most of the treatment options don’t actually do anythng, so…yeah. Argh. My sympathy to you. :)

    My first attack where I lost sight in my right eye I didn’t have lesions on my brain. I have no idea the current state even though I’ve had another really bad attack. Lack of health care. ER’s just wanting to get rid of you and such so I’m out of luck.

    No spinal tap (shudder). MRI’s are bad enough.

  288. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @QQH:

    If you do not stop yourself, I’ll kindly stop for thee

  289. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    No spinal tap (shudder). MRI’s are bad enough.

    MRIs are worse than this?

  290. QueQuoiHuh says

    @390
    Caine,
    RE: rajkumar, well, the ridiculous thing is that online, I would have a really hard time making him get it. If he’d ever worked in a kitchen with me, it would take about 2 days for him to get it. Thus, the reason for me attempting to sharpen my fangs as well as my kitchen knives. (note: I am not offering up violence, they are just the tools of my trade)
    It’s amazing how people will listen to someone in a white coat with knives and access to fire.
    Oh wait… Are you offering him as an easy chew-toy to a recently de-lurked Pharyngulite?
    *salivates, swallows, takes deep breaths, puts knives away*
    So, I will take my ass to TZT… *wicked smile*

  291. says

    MRIs, meh. I have to get so many of those every year, I pretty much just nap as soon as I get shunted in. I don’t use earplugs or the washcloth. The big ones are a lot nicer than the little ones they truck around, though.

  292. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    OK, so remember my comment at 261? Here it is:

    The only thing that would make this day even better is if a new person complains about my ‘nym and tells me how outraged they are that I claim to speak for all gays cuz you don’t speak for me.

    Best day evah. It totally just happened over on JT’s blog!

    Baal writes:

    My complaint (thinking mostly of Josh who ironically does and does speak for all gays) is that if you chose to express your anger solely by lashing out, repeatedly

  293. says

    QQH:

    Oh wait… Are you offering him as an easy chew-toy to a recently de-lurked Pharyngulite?

    Yes. In the other sense, you’d find him very poor fare indeed. Very little meat there.

  294. QueQuoiHuh says

    @395
    Crip Dyke,
    I was so excited for the zombie apocalypse, that I forgot myself.
    I apologize. *starts deep breathing*

  295. Just_A_Lurker says

    I hate MRI’s. Tiny little tube, can’t move, it’s so bright and dry. Just horrible. Spinal taps much worse to me. Sticking anything into my spine is scary to me. Of course, I don’t have any personal experience since I couldn’t get an epidural during childbirth.

  296. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Dammit, Josh, now you’ve given me a reason to look into that thread again.

    :sigh:

    I suppose it can’t be helped. But I won’t be commenting. Really. I have my SIWOTI totally under control. I don’t have to comment if I don’t want to.

  297. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    And a hearty Scree! Scree! back atcha Pterryx!

    Seriously. I honestly don’t get the phenomenon. How STUPID do you have to be to look at my ‘nym and conclude that:

    a) I mean it seriously and claim to speak for Teh Ghey

    b) That it would even be possible for me to speak for all Teh Ghey? How would that work? Would I get an Official SpokesRemote with the job? Something I could point into the air while screaming “Faggots on mute!” then start discoursing?

  298. says

    QQH:

    Caine,
    Very little meat?

    Mmmm. Next to nothing to sharpen the fangs on. Misogyniraj filled up 9 incarnations of TZT, there’s plenty of shit to view.

    Think Puff Tart™ – flaky crust filled with hot air.

  299. Louis says

    Josh, #400,

    Yeah but you totally don’t speak for all gays, man. Your nym is, like, totally arrogant and misleading

    {Eyeroll at people who are irony deficient}

    Louis

  300. Antiochus Epiphanes says

    At least MRIs don’t kill drummers.

    I didn’t want to laugh.
    —————————————
    Also, I am so ignorant about different segmments of the atheist community that I always assumed that DJ Grothe was some kind of secular-techno entertainer.

    I need to get out more.

    Or maybe not.

    *grumble*

    What the fuck is wrong with us that we can’t find a way to behave at meetings*? That’s what a lot of this nonsense is about, right? Anything that infringes on ones right to act like a boner with a wallet and an agenda is just beyond the pale, I guess. We can’t behave better than any standard HR boilerplate would mandate?

    The harassment is troubling, but the fact that people don’t find it troubling is, well…more troubling.

    *Yes, yes. Other segments of the population behave as badly, but I like to use my secularism to feel superior to those segments, and I find that I am struggling to find the sweet spot of late.

  301. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    Josh, perhaps you should go back to the roots – Official Spokesfish, right? That oughta confuse ‘em.

    Good memory! I will. . .but only if you become Official SpokesSquaw.

    /running away

  302. Antiochus Epiphanes says

    That it would even be possible for me to speak for all Teh Ghey? How would that work? Would I get an Official SpokesRemote with the job? Something I could point into the air while screaming “Faggots on mute!” then start discoursing?

    It’s so much easier to speak for the trees. They shush so willingly.

  303. RahXephon, Bouncer of the De Facto Feminist Club says

    Ooh ooh, can I be the spokesperson for something?

  304. Richard Austin says

    Josh:

    That it would even be possible for me to speak for all Teh Ghey? How would that work? Would I get an Official SpokesRemote with the job? Something I could point into the air while screaming “Faggots on mute!” then start discoursing?

    I thought we were on The Clapper? Seems to work in most bars I know…

  305. Predator Handshake says

    Mattir: I sent you an email and totally forgot to wish you happy birthday! *pulls the string on one of those confetti tube things, raining wrapped treats on everyone*

    Millicent: Welcome! Millie was the name of IMO one of the best-played characters on Freaks and Geeks, although she was a bit of a square most of the time.

  306. dianne says

    I don’t have any personal experience since I couldn’t get an epidural during childbirth.

    I got one. It wasn’t so bad. I didn’t even feel the needle going in. This is because a) it’s a small needle and b) I was having contractions that were so painful I probably wouldn’t have noticed if someone had taken a power tool to my spine. Maybe I’m not really the best person to ask about this.

  307. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    So I looked in on the thread. I’d read a bunch of it earlier, but there was still lots new.

    I read the specific post in question where ze tries to go all policy-wonk…

    The issue isn’t limited to “Is JT overstepping his progressive blog host mantle in squashing commenter in a facially biased (they are all gay) fashion.”

    This is the funnest evah!

    I haven’t been to law school (yet), though I studied the constitution as a political and ethical document. And yet *I know* (and lots of non-lawyers I know know) what “facially” means and what “as applied” means.

    It’s particularly wo(nd)e(r)ful that cupcake proceeds to add a parenthetical expression to leave no doubt that he has no clue whereof ze speaks. So confident that everything ze says is worthwhile that it matters not ze is clueless on, y’know, tangentially related things like the definitions of the words ze uses in hir argument.

    I don’t know if I’m amused or just appalled.

  308. QueQuoiHuh says

    @413
    Caine,
    So, you’re saying that I have to go out an fatten my own prey?
    *rubs hands together*

  309. Louis says

    Josh, #360,

    You call that fuckin’? That ain’t fuckin’. I’ll show you some fuckin’! I’ll show you what fuckin’ is! Ah yeah, now that’s some fuckin’!

    You mean that’s not how it’s done?

    Louis

  310. birgerjohansson says

    Name suggestions: Mordred? I think it can be used both for boys and girls.
    Lilith? (as First Woman, and person who stood up to Adam Animalfucker she totally rocked).
    Middle name: Facehugger.

  311. Richard Austin says

    Jay Townsend, Campaign Spokesman for the GOP rep in NY-19, in a post on Facebook:

    Let’s hurl some acid at those female democratic Senators who won’t abide the mandates they want to impose on the private sector.

    (I’m just full of happy fun stuff to post today…)

  312. Mattir says

    I totally freaked out my anesthesiologist right before he did my spinal for my c-section by saying “oh goodie, I’ve always wanted to try intrathecal opiates!!!”. He was great nevertheless. I’ve decided that anesthesiologists are among my favorite specialty physicians because they’re the ones who deal most directly with people who are afraid and in pain. He was the only one during that surgery who appeared to pay the slightest attention to me as anything other than a container for the Spawns.

  313. life is like a pitbull with lipstick ॐ says

    Feminism 499 wouldn’t be this insensitive to trans commenters unless it were run by radscum.

    So I clicked over and saw:

    UPDATE: As Shaker IraeNicole first noted in comments, Daly’s work was unfortunately marred by a streak of transphobia. Wikipedia summarizes its emergence in her work, including her assertion in Gyn/Ecology that transgender people are “Frankensteinian.” While we want to honor her contributions to feminist thought, we also want to note the limitations of her brand of feminism, which deemed some women monstrous, a view that Shakesville endeavors quite fervently to counter. Cait and Shaker just_some_trans_guy also note she was challenged on her racism as well.

    Is it your contention that all radical feminists are “scum”? If not, then isn’t it fair to say “radscum” would never have added that update?

  314. says

    QQH:

    So, you’re saying that I have to go out an fatten my own prey?
    *rubs hands together*

    Well…you can try. I doubt you’d be successful with rajkumar, who is the only idiot/troll currently confined to the troll pen (TZT).

    Birger:

    Middle name: Facehugger.

    :falls over laughing: +8

  315. says

    Let’s hurl some acid at those female democratic Senators who won’t abide the mandates they want to impose on the private sector.

    Jesus Christ on a string of cheap plastic beads. What in the fuck is wrong with people?

  316. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Allowed tags, Y U NO LIST “Comic sans”?

  317. says

    Richard:
    A yup. Just saw that over on Wonkette.

    What the fuck is wrong with Republicans? Why the fuck can’t they even fucking control their fucking spokespeople anymore?

    For the record (in case anyone was wondering), Nan Hayworth is the Congresscritter from just north of here. She’s an asshole, don’t get me wrong, but she’s not that epically evil.

  318. QueQuoiHuh says

    @433
    Caine,
    rajkumar is so mealymouthed.
    Taking your advice and heading over to greener pastures to look for better chew toys to sharpen my fangs on.
    See you soon. :)

  319. Tony says

    Ogvorbis:

    I feel very manly man right now. About a half-hour ago, I, using a rubber band, and from a distance of about 30cm, killed a large hornet. [smells armpits] Manly!

    (The manly-man part is a joke, but I really did just take down an airborne hornet using a small yellow rubberband. Do you call that job satisfaction? ‘Cause I don’t. I think I’ll just go stand in a corner and rust.])

    Damn. That’s skill!
    For some reason I have images of the Herculoids in my mind…Zandor specifically.

  320. Josh, Official SpokesFish says

    Wait—I just pushed my SpokesRemote to put Teh Ghey on mute but Tony’s still talking!

  321. Richard Austin says

    Audley:

    Mavilus

    It’s marvelous!
    (what? someone was going to say it…)

  322. Louis says

    Ogvorbis,

    I too would like to:

    a) Congratulate you on your rubber band shot. That was a masterful performance and to be honest, I would dine out on that for a month!

    b) Sniff your armpits to double check the manliness. Can’t beat an independent verification. Please hold your armpits to an open USB port for inspection.

    Louis

  323. Cipher, OM, MQ says

    Caine,
    EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
    THANK YOU!
    It’s adorable, and the card is 1.) pretty and 2.) nice and 3.) from you, and the timing was really, really perfect.
    Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

  324. Louis says

    TONY!!!!!!!!!! GET PERMISSION FROM YOUR OFFICIALLY DESIGNATED SPOKESGAY BEFORE….BEFORE….WELL….EVERYTHING.

    DON’T MAKE ME COME DOWN THERE AND GET DRUNK WITH YOU.

    Louis

  325. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Thank you Audley & Caine.

    It so happens that I needed it to speak to Audley. I have neglected your new list of names & thought I would contribute the name of an old D&D character:

    Imar, the Wicked

    “Wicked” of course, being optional (though highly recommended for certain values of [age].

    Come to think of it

    Tomin
    and
    Aeolene

    both work regardless of gender as well.

  326. says

    Josh, I have no choice but to assume that you are a fish now, and I resent these manipulative, bizarre tactics. You keep on moving the goalposts! First you were a Churlish Ingrate, then you were an Official Spokesgay (which is obviously not true since you can’t speak for all of The Gays, so why would you even say it?) and now you are an Official Spokesfish. I’m afraid that this is where I stop reading, because you cannot decide what you want to say or how to say it.

  327. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    He suffered martyrdom at Adrumetum, by being thrown to wild beasts, in 212.

    And not at all inappropriate for someone who will eventually be introduced to the Horde!

  328. Josh, Official SpokesFish says

    Jennifer, I will have you know that I was the SpokesGay first, and it was only after I got above my station that I became a Churlish Ingrate. Now that I’m a SpokesFish I don’t have to speak to you unless you ply me with my favorite dried flakes and say what a helpful, well-meaning totally-never-wrong fish I am.

  329. Part-Time Insomniac, Zombie Porcupine Nox Arcana Fan says

    Mattir – LOL! I doubt the anesthesiologist heard that much enthusiasm often and certainly not out of interest in sampling the product!
    ———————————————-

    Crip Dyke, congrats! Sounds like you had the perfect meal and drink to celebrate. Sometimes it’s nice just to celebrate alone.
    ———————————————

    My friend M’s husband retired today! 34 years working in his field. He could have stayed a bit longer and gotten a bigger pension and such, but he’s had enough. And in 2 weeks, he flies over to live in the US for good! Wheee! Just another reason to travel to Rochester more often!
    ———————————————

    Koshka – The hell? I’m sorry you and your partner have to deal with such pious muppets like that one. They’ll take any tragedy and turn it into a showcase for their faith.
    ——————————————–

    So, my brother and SIL are moving to Boston. He got a job offer at Northeastern University. It’s been more than a year, I think, since he left his position at NYU. He was wavering, but decided to say yes to Northeastern.

    He’ll miss NYC, I know that. He’s lived there since college. It’s where his heart is. We tell him that at least he can still visit there occasionally, it’s not like he’s moving out of the country. Still, it’s going to be an adjustment for him. SIL loves Boston, though, so at least there won’t be two people adapting to a new place.

    And hey, there’s a bar that’s strictly for Yankee fans! Learning about that must have brightened my brother’s day a bit.
    ———————————————————

    OK, off to catch up with rest of thread, hopefully before PZ lowers the portcullis again.

  330. 'Tis Himself says

    Can we start a club of people who’ve been banned from other blogs?

    I’ve been banned from three blogs: The Freep, some Christian blog whose name I forget, and Greg Laden’s fiasco. I’m so proud of myself!

    <pats self on back, strains arm>

  331. 'Tis Himself says

    Audley,

    Suggest Percy to Mr. Darkheart. When he sneers at the name, mention the Percy family, starting with Henry Percy, 1st Earl of Northumberland, whose son was Henry “Hotspur” Percy and whose descendents were major players in the War of the Roses. Percy may be considered a sissy name, the Percies didn’t fit that mold.

  332. carlie says

    Ack! There’s so much pollen out here that it looks like it’s snowing!

    I couldn’t figure out where it was all coming from at my house, but here it’s the cinnamon fern sporing all over the place.

    I got one. It wasn’t so bad. I didn’t even feel the needle going in.

    Oh holy hell I felt it. Wasn’t pain, really, it just felt wrong. Entirely wrong. My body was all “nuh-uh oh no you didn’t just put something there”. It’s hard to describe. It was as if every cell in my nervous system was screaming to get it out.

    But then that beautiful icy coldness started radiating down my body, and I could have kissed the anesthesiologist, I was so happy.

    But then again, I can hear it in my inner ear when I get an allergy shot, so maybe my body is just made weird.

  333. says

    Josh, Official SpokesFish

    :falls over laughing: Can you get in a post at JT’s Wonder World of Denial™ now? Just one? Pleeeeaaaase?

    Cipher:

    Caine,
    EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
    THANK YOU!

    I’m so happy! Glad you liked the card, I painted it just for you. :) Now that you’ve Eeeeeeeeeeeed all over, aren’t you going to tell everyone what you got?

  334. Tony says

    Louis:

    TONY!!!!!!!!!! GET PERMISSION FROM YOUR OFFICIALLY DESIGNATED SPOKESGAY BEFORE….BEFORE….WELL….EVERYTHING.

    DON’T MAKE ME COME DOWN THERE AND GET DRUNK WITH YOU

    but don’t I need permission to even get drunk with you?
    Oh wait, not anymore. He’s the ‘spokesfish’ now. Whew.
    Let’s get our drunk on!
    Louis, you bring the chew toy.
    Speaking of alcohol, these companies keep coming up with really creative containers for liquor. I saw several bottles of rum, vodka and tequila at a local store that were shaped like guns (one was in the shape of a tommy gun). Thankfully, they were transparent.
    Then there’s the vodka in a fire extinguisher style bottle. I’d say it was on par with Stoli or Smirnoff.

  335. says

    Jennifer, I am so sorry about what you’ve been going through re custody of your son. I am rooting for you. And sending (comforting beverage of your choice plus really best cookies) through the USB.

    Your posts have been awesome, too. I am so glad you delurked!

    Also welcome to QueQuoiHuh & Millicent!

    It’s exciting to see new people posting! The recent nonsense has had at least one good outcome! (although from a personal standpoint, I’ve upped my participation to a level inversely proportionate to how my productivity on my writing has fallen – life balance, I needz it).

    Audley – love, love love Margot.

  336. says

    Audley:

    This list is getting long and excellent!

    Hey! You didn’t like Ajax?

    ‘Tis, nothing wrong with Percival. I had a van named Percival. Besides, the character Sir Percy Blakeney, played by the delicious Leslie Howard in The Scarlet Pimpernel (1934). Percy is a good name.

  337. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Tony:

    You misunderstand cladistics. You are a fish. An Osteichthyes (sp?). Not only do you need permission from Josh before taking any actions that might reflect publicly on your clade, but so must snakes, extant maniraptorans, non-avian archosaurs, X-ray Tetras, leatherbacks, and coelacanths.

    Josh’s power has expanded a million-fold! Tremble in fear of his SpokesMight!

    Unless you’re a cephalopod. Then you’re totes out of his juris-my-diction.

  338. carlie says

    nothing wrong with Percival.

    Percival was also Nellie’s husband on Little House on the Prairie. And very cute.

    How about Poindexter?

  339. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Carlie –

    In my head Spoketopus ==> Spocktopus

    Now I’m imagining illithid Vulcans who so totally eat brains anymore, ‘cuz it’s illogical. Unless you’re mating.

  340. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    so totally don’t eat brains anymore

    FIFM

  341. Josh, Official SpokesFish says

    Percival was also Nellie’s husband on Little House on the Prairie. And very cute.

    Oh hells yes. . .I thought I was the only person who remembered inane shit like that!

    Not as cute as Albert, though.

  342. Josh, Official SpokesFish says

    SpokesFish? How about SpokesSquid? Spoketopus?

    Um, I don’t see hoomin hand plying me with special flakes. So I must not hear anyone talking to me either.

  343. says

    Crip Dyke:

    Spocktopus

    LOL. Oh gods, best fuckin’ creature, evar, in the Multiverse.

    Josh, you’re sounding like a noisy head in a jar. Here, have some Torgo’s executive powder.

  344. Tony says

    Crip Dyke:

    You misunderstand cladistics. You are a fish. An Osteichthyes (sp?). Not only do you need permission from Josh before taking any actions that might reflect publicly on your clade, but so must snakes, extant maniraptorans, non-avian archosaurs, X-ray Tetras, leatherbacks, and coelacanths.

    One of the things I appreciate about TET is that one can indulge in fun goofiness, yet still impart knowledge.
    That’s my roundabout way of saying “I didn’t know what cladistics was before reading your comment. Now I do.”
    Thanks :)

  345. says

    Also, I am so ignorant about different segments of the atheist community that I always assumed that DJ Grothe was some kind of secular-techno entertainer.

    Soooooo… He’s not?

    Pity. Seems a bit of a waste, really.

    Sorta more seriously: I don’t get to a lot of conferences, either (did one in Montreal, once, and could really only sneak in for part of one day to hear PZ and Brian Dalton and another talk or two, and my socializing was necessarily restricted to a few hours) and I’ve got to admit this whole brouhaha is giving me an odd picture of just what that scene is usually like…

    I mean: I didn’t hit on anyone while I was there… Should I have? It’s beginning to sound like I wasn’t holding up my end or something.

    It’s odd. Someone I know was telling me the sci-fi/fantasy-type themed things she goes to are like these crazy/pushy/stressful scenes, with much hitting on and so on (and I wasn’t even so much asking: just mentioned I’d never been and she was all like: ‘Seriously, don’t bother’)… She’s a costumer, among other things, sells to the cosplayers, so it’s kinda a business thing being there, but she was strongly implying that otherwise, she’d just be saying to hell with it, too…

    I remember being none too surprised about that, actually, after a few moments’ thought. In retrospect it made a certain sense… It’s probably more than a mite snooty of me to think it, sure*, but I found myself thinking somethin’ like: well, of course… Geeks getting out of the house, running wild. Sounds like trouble, obviously. I guess I’ll just take this odd news as words to the wise and avoid such places. But then, there, I probably would have anyway…

    And this, I suppose, will also come off as likewise snottily unkind, but my internal monologue about sceptical conferences is now coming out to something kinda the same, hearing this stuff… Somethin’ like: seriously, screw that scene.

    Granted, the ixnay of one snob who just doesn’t want to associate with folk of such decorum that they behave like rutting goats when you let them out in public probably isn’t going to shame anyone into desisting or nothing, I guess. Nor is anyone likely to miss me a whole lot, given this attitude, but still…

    Still, it kinda pisses me off, like it does you. Maybe for part of the same reason. Also, the difference between my reaction to the news about fantasy/sci-fi cons was: the skeptical/atheist cons: I kinda would have liked to do a few more of those… But that just increasingly doesn’t sound like my kinda place, y’know…

    (And I think that’s probably really saying something, coming from me. There’s lots of places are my kinda place, usually.)

    Anyway, on balance: as to women who say no thanks for their I assume far more compelling reasons: I guess I sure as hell can’t blame them.

    (*/Notwithstanding that, absolutely, I am a geek, if you’re allowed to self-identify, of course.)

  346. says

    Someone has to adopt Spocktopus as part of their nym now. I demand it.

    Carlie:

    Archibald is pretty cute for a name. I’ve always liked Archie.

    No! No, no, no. If you must have something which can by nicked into Archie, go with Archer.

  347. Josh, Official SpokesFish says

    Here, have some Torgo’s executive powder.

    Thank you, Doctor Goodnsexy!

  348. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Caine:
    I was kindof imagining The Grand PoopyHead™ might be our best bet for a Spocktopus…

    …although Ms Grand PoopyHead might be disappointed at the new mating schedule.

  349. Wowbagger, Vile Demagogue says

    Mr Percival was the name of a pelican in the classic Australian book/film Storm Boy.

  350. carlie says

    New My Drunk Kitchen!

    Not as cute as Albert, though.

    Not for me – it was always Percival. Usually not my type, but those curls! He and Allison were best buds in real life, too, which makes watching the reruns of them even more fun.

    Spocktopus: I find your denial of your privilege…illogical.

  351. Cipher, OM, MQ says

    Tis, first of all, LILAPWL is SGBM, who is a man. Second, he was, as far as I can see, pretty clear about what he was saying, which is that ironic sexism can be actual sexism, if and to the extent that it normalizes sexist behavior, so it often depends on the context. Didn’t make a statement about whether Louis’s post turns out to be actual sexism or not.

  352. says

    Caine:

    If you must have something which can by nicked into Archie, go with Archer.

    I take it that you don’t watch Archer. I don’t think I could use that name for my child! XD

    (Granted, his first name is Sterling, but still.)

    Speaking of “occupation” names, on The Real List™, I’ve got Harper for a girl. Well, had. I erased The Real List™ so I can start from scratch.

  353. ImaginesABeach says

    At the same time that the call for outrageous names went out this afternoon, I ran across the name “Tasti” at work. Don’t know if it rhymes with “nasty” or with “pastry”, but either way, it needs to go on the “give me Max or you will suffer my wrath” list.

  354. Rey Fox says

    So, what does everybody think of the John Edwards mistrial? I only ask because one of the other hotel guests asked me about it on my way back from the vending machine.

  355. carlie says

    Ooo, Audley – have you seen this? It is so awesome. You type a name in, and it gives you a graph of that name’s popularity through the last hundred and thirty years or so. It also gives you a bunch of name variants and their popularity as you type, predictive of how the name could end.

  356. Louis says

    Oh lawksamercy! Don’t apply a title to PZ, especially not anything that the ironically challenged might take issue with. They have enough spitting bile and drivelling to do anyway, giving them “spokes-” as a suffix to PZ’s name is a gift they neither need nor deserve.

    Can you imagine? {Shudder}

    Urgh the fuckwittery annoys me even when only imagined.

    Louis

  357. drbunsen le savant fou says

    That’s it, Brownian, I can resist your wily charms no more, you gorgeous hunk of brainmeats.

    I hereby take a number for Teh Groop Secks. I know, I know, the queue is ridiculous. I DON’T CARE. I’ll wait.

  358. says

    I’m probably threadrupt, but I read to the end of the Thread as it exists on my screen right now and I refuse to do more before I succumb to the satisfaction of shootin’ off my mouth.

    Happy birthday Mattir, and welcome to all the recently delurked.

    Janine:

    My mom had eight kids and she got angry, she could not keep our names straight.

    I kinda admire your mom because I only have the two, one is a girl and one is a boy, their names not in any way similar, and they look completely different with 5 years of age between them and I still can’t keep them straight when I’m pissed. I tell them that’s how crazy they’ve made me, I can’t even tell them apart anymore.

  359. says

    Audley:

    I take it that you don’t watch Archer.

    Nope, never heard of it before now. I *love* Harper. Works for boy and girl. The Master Harper, Robinton, was my fave character in The Dragonriders of Pern.

  360. carlie says

    their names not in any way similar, and they look completely different with 5 years of age between them and I still can’t keep them straight when I’m pissed.

    I will admit to being one of those moms who has even used the cat’s name in the lineup trying to figure out which kid I’m yelling at.

  361. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @drbunsen:

    There’s a queue waiting to get involved in teh groop sehks?

    You’re doing it wrong.

  362. Josh, Official SpokesFish says

    You’re doing it wrong.

    Right? Any fool knows you hand out a card with your junk pictured on it.

  363. Josh, Official SpokesFish says

    On names:

    Almost all parents fall victim to the idea that their kid’s name should not be like all hir peers’ names. But they end up picking the same “unusual” names. This is a well-documented phenomenon and it happens to most parents. Look how many (shudder) “Jaydens” and “Kaydens” we’re seeing (scare quotes because those aren’t real names. No, they’re not.)

    My mother did it. She thought Joshua was unusual but not freakish. Well, it turns out there are so many Joshes in my age cohort that there’s no fewer than three of us at every dinner party I go to. Sometimes four. And if they’re not Joshes they’re Jasons or Justins or Jennifers.

    I love Max, Audley, but I’m sorry to tell you it’s not that unique. The kid across the street is named that (he’s four) and he’s not the only one I’ve run across. Names that were old-timey-sounding always come back around. We’re seeing Sophies and Maxes and Adelaides and Sylvias—a veritable waiting room at the local Jewish retirement home:)

    Don’t agonize over the name.

  364. The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa) says

    Wow, who the fuck is illithid, and has he always been such a raging jackass?

  365. Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @TLC:

    RIght? He’s given mind flayers a bad name.

  366. says

    I will admit to being one of those moms who has even used the cat’s name in the lineup trying to figure out which kid I’m yelling at.

    You mean the dog’s name, right? Uh, not that I’ve ever done that. Nope. Totally not at all.