Hell is an American airport

Today is the day the Trump administration is sending ICE into our airports, to help reduce long lines. Does anyone actually believe that?

Donald Trump and his border czar, Tom Homan, have followed through on promises from the president’s administration to send in Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents to US airports beginning on Monday to assist with security amid extremely long lines – and to help airport security agents who have been working without pay since 14 February because of a partial government shutdown.

I fail to see how adding more overbearing security to a system that is already packed with pointless security theater will help the lines. I also wonder if these ICE goons will be armed and masked? It sounds like a recipe for greater chaos and inefficiency to me, and that it’s really a strategy for increasing fear and tension.

Take a look at the current situation. Will ICE actually help?

To amplify the problem, check out this video on Bluesky.

Incredible scene: Travelers wait on hours-long security line at George Bush International Airport in Houston while Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless the USA” blasts through the speakers.

Yeah. Long lines plus Lee Greenwood? This is precisely what Hell would look like.

My experience with air travel in the last few years has been absolutely miserable and convinced me that I never want to fly anywhere ever again…and it’s gotten even worse.

Madman at the wheel

On Friday, we got one confusing message from our president.

“I don’t want to do a ceasefire. You know you don’t do a ceasefire when you’re literally obliterating the other side,” he told journalists at the White House.

However, later on Friday night, he wrote on his Truth Social platform that the US was considering “winding down” military operations in Iran. “We are getting very close to meeting our objectives as we consider winding down our great Military efforts in the Middle East with respect to the Terrorist Regime of Iran,” he wrote.

The reports that Washington is considering plans to occupy or blockade Kharg Island come despite earlier suggestions by Trump that he was not leaning towards putting “boots on the ground”.

I approve of the “winding down” idea, and in fact favor apologizing, offering reparations, and skedaddling out of the region. Unfortunately, those two words mean something different to the lunatic who started this whole mess.

Donald Trump said he was considering “winding down” military operations in the Middle East even as the US is reportedly sending three more amphibious assault ships and roughly 2,500 additional marines to the region.

Sending in more assault ships and marines doesn’t sound much like a “winding down.” That sounds more like escalating and threatening greater engagement. Especially since he has now delivered an ultimatum.

Donald Trump has given Iran 48 hours to reopen the strait of Hormuz to shipping or face the destruction of its energy infrastructure, as Tehran launched its most destructive attack yet on Israel.

The ultimatum, made just a day after the US president said he was considering “winding down” military operations after three weeks of war, came as the key oil passage remained effectively closed and thousands more US Marines headed to the Middle East.

Trump wrote on Truth Social that the US would “hit and obliterate” Iranian power plants – “starting with the biggest one first” – if Tehran did not fully reopen the strait within 48 hours, or 23:44 GMT on Monday according to the time of his post.

I think the “winding down” comment was nothing but TACO’s instincts coming to the fore — I suspect he’s sweating over the fact that a disastrous decision is coming back to bite him in the butt, and he’d like to chicken out if he could find a way to save face while doing so. I doubt that Iran will give him a way, and so…get ready for a half-assed, stupidly managed attack on Kharg Island that will leave a lot of American soldiers dead. He’s just going to vacillate for a bit before committing to an even bigger blunder.

Breaking news: TRUMP ALWAYS CHICKENS OUT.

I AM PLEASE TO REPORT THAT THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AND THE COUNTRY OF IRAN, HAVE HAD, OVER THE LAST TWO DAYS, VERY GOOD AND PRODUCTIVE CONVERSATIONS REGARDING A COMPLETE AND TOTAL RESOLUTION OF OUR HOSTILITIES IN THE MIDDLE EAST. BASED ON THE TENOR AND TONE OF THESE IN DEPTH, DETAILED, AND CONSTRUCTIVE CONVERSATIONS, WITCH WILL CONTINUE THROUGHOUT THE WEEK, I HAVE INSTRUCTED THE DEPARTMENT OF WAR TO POSTPONE ANY AND ALL MILITARY STRIKES AGAINST IRANIAN POWER PLANTS AND ENERGY INFRASTRUCTURE FOR A FIVE DAY PERIOD.

So what’s happening with all the assault ships and marines heading to the Strait of Hormuz? It sounds now like he’s calling the whole thing off.

Good.

I don’t like this feeling of deja vu

I’m a child of the 1950s, and I grew up with those stupid duck-and-cover drills and a general feeling of fear. The threat was that a foreign power might decide to shut down the US for their advantage, and the fear would escalate with the amount of sabre-rattling we’d hear from elsewhere. We were also concerned about the Strangelove scenario — what if a madman got control of our nuclear arsenal?

Now we have the new nightmare: what if we had a conventional war with all sides shouting hatred AND a madman with a finger on the button? That’s where we’re at now: our president has staked his already massive ego on achieving a quick, easy victory over Iran, which isn’t going to happen. He’s gone from claiming that there will be a quick surgical strike to we’ve already won the war to begging for $200 billion to continue the war. The polls are plummeting, the public is finding him unpopular, and we know how much his ego hinges on his poll numbers. As the war worsens, as the oil stops flowing, as we eventually decide to back off because we can’t afford to continue, someone is going to be looking for a quick fix. And if that someone is remarkably stupid, launching a few tactical nukes will look increasingly attractive.

I’ve been checking out my desk. There’s room under there, I’d fit.

The last Andy Weir movie I will ever waste money on

The commenters here are persuasive. I dissed Andy Weir and his new movie, and I was told that it was entertaining and I should give it a chance. So I did. I went to the theater to see Project Hail Mary.

I loathed it.

Sorry.

The premise is garbage. Weir postulates an “astrophage,” a bacterium that harvests carbon from Venus and then streams to the sun, “eating” the sun, collecting vast amounts of energy, dimming the sun, and threatening humanity with extinction within decades. They send a probe to the line flowing between Venus and the Sun and collect the mysterious black particles, bring it back to Earth, and a middle school science teacher looks in a microscope and figures out that it’s an organism that harvests energy from stars.

Stop right there. I’d appreciate it if someone could justify that plot hook, which wouldn’t have been out of place in a 1950s hack disaster movie. It’s stupid.

Then astronomers notice that all the local stars are experiencing this same mysterious dimming. The “astrophage” must be infectious! Let’s not concern ourselves with the timing: we observe a rapid phenomenon occurring within the lifespan of a single human being simultaneously in a population of stars scattered over a volume 100 light years across. There’s a complete lack of awareness of space and time in this movie.

Humanity’s response is to quickly build a spaceship to fly to the one star, Tau Ceti, that isn’t exhibiting the mysterious dimming to see if they can find a “cure”. Fortunately, the “astrophages” also store such a tremendous amount of energy that they can form a fantastic, near-magical rocket fuel, enabling the construction of a starship that can travel at something near light-speed. This is the kind of exotic nonsensical space fuel you’d find in a 1930s pulp novel.

The plan is to send a small crew with one engineer, one pilot, and one scientist to a star 12 light years away, to collect information about how Tau Ceti was resisting the infection, and then return to Earth with a solution. That’s going to take at least 24 years round-trip, to deal with a crisis that’s going to doom Earth in 30 years. My problem was that my mental calendar was getting hopelessly lost by this time.

Then the scientist who is expected to lead this critical mission to stop human extinction was the middle school science teacher. This teacher is the charming, charismatic, appealing Ryan Gosling. We’re doomed if that is our selection criterion.

The ship takes off. Next thing we know, Ryan Gosling wakes up from an induced coma (that’s how humans can survive a 12 light-year trip?), the two other crew members have died — no explanation provided, but nice to know pilots and engineers are superfluous — and Gosling has amnesia.

That’s just the setup for the main part of the story, and it’s such radically nonsensical and unscientific garbage that I felt like walking out, and only stayed in my seat by virtue of Ryan Gosling’s charm and the curiosity and need to find out how the story would crawl out of this mass of sewage.

No spoilers. You’ll have to suffer as I did if you want the answers.

Short answer: Gosling finds a cute chatty alien who is there for the same purpose, and they team up. Don’t worry, there’s none of that complicated first-contact rigamarole to establish communication — they just point at things and say words and use a computer to compile a dictionary. Quickly. Mostly off-screen. Can’t let the whole alien complication that Weir has introduced get in the way of the whole star-eating space bacteria problem that Weir introduced!

Gosling also has a Weir staple: a white board that he can scribble on to solve science problems. For example, Gosling discovers a problem that will make the alien’s spaceship break down on the way to its home in 40 Eridani. So he scribbles some stuff on the white board and decides to fly off to the rescue, and somehow find this stranded spaceship somewhere between Tau Ceti and 40 Eridani. Are you surprised to learn that he does? Spaceships are easy! All you need for interstellar navigation is a white board and a collection of colored markers, and a pilot with no training who was hired on the basis of his entertaining middle-school science classes.

Ryan Gosling is a good actor who gave a great performance in an unbelievable role, and the alien (named Rocky) was amusing and somewhat original, but you will never, ever, ever, ever convince me to see another movie based on an Andy Weir book. He’s a hack.

Jesus christ, that movie was fucking stupid.

How to respond to a death

Robert Mueller has died. It’s not that I have strong feelings about this guy, but I was pleased to see that Donald Trump did have strong feelings.

Robert Mueller just died. Good, I’m glad he’s dead. He can no longer hurt innocent people! President DONALD J. TRUMP

Remember this! When the old orange dotard finally dies, he has nicely set an example of the appropriate response. “Donald J. Trump just died. Good, I’m glad he’s dead. He can no longer hurt innocent people!” It’s perfect!

Noah, or Snow White?

I have a lot of different genetics texts, and I sometimes browse through them to get different perspectives, or in this case to get ideas for exam questions. I was skimming through Cummings’ Human Heredity: Principles and Issues when I ran into this surprising text box.

The biblical character Noah, along with the Ark and its animals, is among the most recognizable figures in the Book of Genesis. His birth is recorded in a single sentence, and although the story of how the Ark was built and survived a great flood is told later, there is no mention of Noah’s physical appearance. But other sources contain references to Noah that are consistent with the idea that Noah was one of the first albinos mentioned in recorded history.
The birth of Noah is recorded in several sources, including the Book of Enoch the Prophet, written about 200 B.c. This book, quoted several times in the New Testament, was regarded as lost until 1773, when an Ethiopian version of the text was discovered. In describing the birth of Noah, the text relates that his “flesh was white as snow, and red as a rose; the hair of whose head was white like wool, and long, and whose eyes were beautiful.” A reconstructed fragment of one of the Dead Sea Scrolls describes Noah as an abnormal child born to normal parents. This fragment of the scroll also provides some insight into the pedigree of Noah’s family, as does the Book of Jubilees. According to these sources, Noah’s father (Lamech) and his mother (Betenos) were first cousins. Lamech was the son of Methuselah, and Lamech’s wife was a daughter of Methuselah’s sister. This is important because marriage between close relatives sometimes is involved in pedigrees of autosomal recessive traits, such as albinism.
If this interpretation of ancient texts is correct, Noah’s albinism is the result of a consanguineous marriage, and not only is he one of the earliest albinos on record but his grandfather Methuselah and Methuselah’s sister are the first recorded heterozygous carriers of a recessive genetic trait.

I fail to see what this would add to a student’s understanding of genetics: OK, lot of inbreeding among the Biblical patriarchs, I was entertained by the description of Noah that sounds more like Snow White, I guess Michael Cummings is revealed to have an interest in obscure Biblical text reconstruction, and it might appeal to theologically inclined students, but yeesh, I expect my students to have a better appreciation of the quality of the data.

I don’t think you can claim that Noah was an inbred albino on the basis of such slim evidence. This is a figure who is pretty well swaddled up in myth and legend, who is claimed to have lived through a global flood that didn’t happen, who lived, supposedly, to the age of 950, and who is claimed to have lived around 3000BCE, when your evidence is based on a text fragment from 200BCE. And now we’re going to deduce a detail of his genetics? No, thank you.

Fascinating things I learned today

We get helium as a byproduct of liquified natural gas processing. So it’s a nice side effect of our dependence on oil.

I did not know that.

Helium is heavily used by the semiconductor industry. Making all those fancy high end chips requires helium in the process.

I had no idea.

30% of the world’s helium supply is extracted in Qatar, which ships it the semiconductor manufacturers in Japan, South Korea, Singapore, and Taiwan.

There are all kinds of surprises in the global supply chain.

The ships that transport that crucial element are currently bottled up in the Strait of Hormuz.

I can see where this is going.

Iran just blew up one of Qatar’s helium plants.

Uh-oh.

All this destruction was triggered by a rogue American president, who is also a raging asshole and incompetent moron.

At least I already knew that!

I hope no one was hoping to get a new computer (or an MRI) in the future.

Oh, and hey, if you’ve got a birthday coming up, maybe ixnay on the artypay alloonsbay. They just seem wasteful.

What’s with all the pedos nowadays?

They’ve been here all the time, but somehow were allowed to continue to assault children. I don’t get it. This ought to be one of the greatest taboos in our society. We regard abusers of children as the lowest of the low, when they are caught, but when they’re running free our institutions seem to actively protect them.

The latest story is that another Duggar man has been caught. Joseph Duggar, one of the swarm of children exploited by The “Learning” Channel TLC in their show “19 Kids and Counting” has been arrested.

Former reality TV star Joseph Duggar is facing a child molestation charge in Florida, almost five years after his brother Josh, who also starred in the TLC show “19 Kids and Counting,” was convicted of downloading child sexual abuse images.

Joseph Duggar, 31, was arrested in Arkansas, where he lives, and was awaiting extradition to Florida on Thursday. Duggar is charged with lewd and lascivious behavior on a child under 12 years old, according to an arrest affidavit from the Bay County Sheriff’s Office in Panama City, Florida.

Police officers in Tontitown, Arkansas, on Wednesday contacted deputies in Bay County, saying they had interviewed a 14-year-old girl who told them that Duggar had molested her several times during a family trip to Panama City Beach when she was age 9, according to the affidavit.

Remember that that show was cancelled in 2015 when Joseph’s brother Josh had abused his sisters and a babysitter. He’s in prison for that right now. I guess raping children was a family tradition. He’s from a Baptist family whose only claim to fame was a self-righteous belief that they should have more children than they could care for, and were further entitled by a terrible television network that thought it was entertaining to pump up their privilege by pretending they were role models. Maybe the parents and a few network executives should also be spending some time in a jail cell.

But if you thought the Duggar family saga was appalling enough, get a load of this. The Epstein files have been redacted and censored and hidden away under the shelter of an evil witch, Pam Bondi, who really doesn’t want the truth about her boss, Donald Trump, revealed. But there’s a way around that: congress people have been able to read the uncensored version, and here Representative Dan Goldman reads aloud one of the passages that the Republicans don’t want you to hear.

Trump tried to compel a 13-15 year old girl to perform oral sex on him, she was disgusted and bit him, so he struck her and called her a “bitch”. I am further disgusted by him.

Put Deviant Donald in a prison right next to Josh and Joseph Duggar. That’s one way to prevent him from bombing other countries to distract from his molesting of children.

But somehow we’ve got to fix this problem of rapacious older men attacking children — I don’t have an answer because I can’t even comprehend wanting to do such things.