Taking bad acting to new troughs

Bet you didn’t know I’m the guy who talked the deity into using the horrifically inefficient and cruel process of evolution to create life on earth, didja?

The trick to maneuvering him into doing anything? Appeal to his vanity. The guy is definitely omninarcissistic.

(Psst. Notice that the deity’s science advisor is wearing an “A” pin, and one of Lynn Fellman’s sciency ties. Bad acting is no barrier to sneaky product placement!)

Oh, and don’t forget to subscribe and donate. How else will they ever be able to stop scraping the bottom of the barrel for guest appearances?

The perils of transubstantiation

That little blonde kid needs a lesson in gratitude. What if she’d been sucking on that wafer and it had turned into a toenail? She should be thankful she got a bite of something as nutritious as Jesus’ holy liver.

In case you missed it: Dawkins on Colbert

The Colbert Report

Mon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Richard Dawkins

www.colbertnation.com

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Political Humor

Michael Moore

Colbert just kind of talks over him the whole time, but that’s to be expected.

Mr Deity has an irresistible hook

It’s Saturday night, and I know what you nerds are doing

For some reason, this geeky little saga tickled me.

David: Taunt dude! You’re supposed to be the tank!

Zach: Just back up, you’re drawing agro.

David: I can’t, I’m-

Cheryl: *opening the door* David…?

David: Oh sh*t!

Cheryl: Discarded pizza rolls, empty Mountain Dew bottles…What’s going on here?

David: We were…I was…fixing Zach’s computer!

Cheryl: Liar! *starts bawling* You’re having a LAN party aren’t you!?

David: You weren’t supposed to see this! You aren’t supposed to be home for another three hours!

Zach: I should leave.

David: No, you know what? I’m done hiding.

Cheryl: *crying* You told me you were watching football.

David: Zach and I are in love! With Warcraft.

Cheryl: What’s next, David? Painting Warhammer figures? Magic The Gathering? You’re a child.

Zach: Magic is a complex game of strategy! It’s not for kids!

Cheryl: You stay out of this! You…you…virgin loser!

David: That’s no way to talk to Lucan The Holy!

*Cheryl is taken aback*

David: Listen, Cheryl. We may be working class nobodies in the real world. But here, we’re level 80 Paladins, defending the Alliance from the forces of evil. It may not seem like a big deal to you, but we take a lot of pride in it.

*David puts his arm around Zach. Cheryl stares for a few seconds.*

Cheryl: We are never having sex again.

Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about. I was also sent this revealing listing of WoW players: where did they get that interesting name, I wonder? It’s all good, at least Horde predominates, but I am troubled by the squeaky little gnome named Pharyngula.