For dedicated bibliophiles only

What a deal. For only 99¢, you can get an abridged version of Charles Darwin’s On the Origin of Species by Means of Natural Selection, or the Preservation of Favoured Races in the Struggle for Life; you can tell it’s been abridged because the title has been reduced to Origin of Species. It’s also special because it contains a 50 page introduction by Ray Comfort, which tells you everything that the creationists are sure is wrong about the rest of the book. It’s like a book with multiple personality disorder — two parts that absolutely hate each other, an intro that is the inane product of one of the most stupid minds of our century, and a science text that is the product of one of the greatest minds of the author’s century.

But wait! For only $3.99, you can also get a copy of The Charles Darwin Bible, which is the only Bible in existence to mention DNA, the Cambrian, mutations, peppered moths, etc. And it includes “In-text study notes written specifically for atheists”! Unfortunately, Charles Darwin had nothing at all to do with this Bible; it’s actually the product of Answers in Genesis.

I’m tempted to get copies of each. They look like beautiful examples of creationist “thought”.

Put your affairs in order, biologists. Your time is nigh!

We only have a month or two left. I have been reminded of a prediction made in the July/August 2004 issue of Touchstone magazine. Brace yourselves.

Where is the ID movement going in the next ten years? What new issues will it be exploring, and what new challenges will it be offering Darwinism?

Dembski: In the next five years, molecular Darwinism—the idea that Darwinian processes can produce complex molecular structures at the subcellular level—will be dead. When that happens, evolutionary biology will experience a crisis of confidence because evolutionary biology hinges on the evolution of the right molecules. I therefore foresee a Taliban-style collapse of Darwinism in the next ten years. Intelligent design will of course profit greatly from this. For ID to win the day, however, will require talented new researchers able to move this research program forward, showing how intelligent design provides better insights into biological systems than the dying Darwinian paradigm.

Man, I’m glad I’ll be on sabbatical. It’ll give me a year to patch up the radical changes I’ll have to make in all of my courses after the ID revolution comes. The rest of you are going to be coming back to rubble in September.

Although, I should also mention that the very next paragraph in that article is the one credible paragraph Paul Nelson ever wrote.

Nelson: Easily the biggest challenge facing the ID community is to develop a full-fledged theory of biological design. We don’t have such a theory right now, and that’s a real problem. Without a theory, it’s very hard to know where to direct your research focus. Right now, we’ve got a bag of powerful intuitions, and a handful of notions such as “irreducible complexity” and “specified complexity”–but, as yet, no general theory of biological design.

Almost five years on, still no theory.

A little sympathy for the snookered

As we all know to our great shame, Ken Ham has this Creation “Museum” in Kentucky. As has been reported before, it’s a thoroughly bogus bit of bunco, with dinosaurs wearing saddles and all the ills of the world laid at the feet of Charles Darwin.

There are a few things you might not know. Like that it’s rolling in dough, with almost $18 million in revenue and $14 million in assets. It’s entirely tax free, which helps, and Ham is a relentless self-promoter.

This one may shock you: public schools are sending kids on field trips to the museum. It’s usually under the guise of an extra-curricular activity by a religion club, the loophole David Paszkiewicz (remember him?) used to take kids from Kearny High School in New Jersey there. But get this remark from an education official in Kentucky:

Kentucky Department of Education spokeswoman Lisa Gross said nothing in state law would bar public schools from visiting, if it were part of “a lesson” on “how some perceived the world’s beginnings.”

You know Ham has friends in high places, and they are warming up to open his brand of nonsense and lies to the schools in that area. More minds, more souls, more money for Ken.

And of course, what is Ken Ham’s big, bold, explicit message? That the only tenable belief is in fundamentalist Christianity and a literal interpretation of Genesis. The crew at Answers in Genesis really detests theistic evolution — you know, that compromise position the accommodationists want us to bow down before. To these creationists, anything less than abject capitulation to Biblical literalism will lead to the collapse of Christian America.

Oh, but wait — I know what you are thinking. You’re thinking that this is insane. This is “stupid and crazy and wrong”. You might even be thinking, as I do, that this is dangerous and represents a corruption of education that is doing great harm to our country. You might also feel as I do, that we should not hold back in denouncing this blight of poisonous ignorance in our midst.

You’d be bad if you thought that.

Well, at least according to Michael Ruse, the Discovery Institute’s favorite evilutionist philosopher. You see, Ruse has recently visited the museum, as he wrote to Andrew Brown, and he tried to understand how the creationists feel.

Just for one moment about half way through the exhibit …I got that Kuhnian flash that it could all be true — it was only a flash (rather like thinking that Freudianism is true or that the Republicans are right on anything whatsoever) but it was interesting nevertheless to get a sense of how much sense this whole display and paradigm can make to people

Oh, right. Forget all that stuff about the earth being 6,000 years old, all the diversity of life on earth being packed into a boat for a year, and the adamant belief that atheists, agnostics, and theistic evolutionists are trying to destroy the nation for Satan…we’re supposed to feel for them, and try to understand their psychology. Ruse continues:

It is silly just to dismiss this stuff as false — that eating turds is good for you is [also] false but generally people don’t want to [whereas] a lot of people believe Creationism so we on the other side need to get a feeling not just for the ideas but for the psychology too.

This is what is so awful about the “New Atheists”: they are such horrible, insensitive louts. They can’t overlook the teeny tiny little demand of biblical literalism to see that creationism isn’t quite so wicked. That, at least, is what Andrew Brown dislikes about us.

This is, I think one of the key differences between the new, or militant, atheists and Darwinians like Ruse, just as atheist as they but a lot less anti-religious. The new atheists recoil instinctively from the idea that they should get a feeling for the ideas and psychology of creationists. To them the essential point about believers is that they are stupid and crazy and wrong. So why waste your one life trying to inhabit a mind smaller and more twisted than your own?

See? If only we’d try to see the world through their eyes, we would understand that their beliefs aren’t stupid and crazy and wrong. Or something. I’m not quite sure what. I guess we’re supposed to sympathize with them, and be less critical.

Well, guess what, Andrew and Michael? I do talk with creationists, and I do understand where they’re coming from, and I do sympathize with them greatly. Your assumption that I and other “New Atheists” do not care about the psychology of creationists is false, and I think, counter-productive.

I understand that many creationists are intelligent and sane — they share a lot of values with me, like wanting to be able to think as they please, to raise happy, healthy families, and they are very concerned about their children: they are sure that if their kids aren’t Christian, they’ll be miserable, wretched, and damned to hell for all eternity. I do sympathize with them. I feel great sympathy and sorrow for the fact that they’ve been lied to by deluded con men like Ken Ham, and that they’re living lives driven by an irrational fear…a fear that is reinforced every day by evangelists and fundamentalists and the whole petty shuck-and-jive of religious belief.

I sympathize with their kids, too. These are blameless innocents who are going to be brought up in ignorance, reassured constantly that their foolishness is a virtue, and that learning about this wonderful, beautiful, dangerous, and uncaring universe we live in will lead them to hell. No child should be brought up in fear and darkness.

I sympathize with their fate, because they’re going to grow up just like their parents and spread the fear and ignorance even further. They will want the best for their kids, too, and instead, under the guidance of pious liars, they will wreck those kids’ minds, too. And the cycle will go on and on.

I sympathize with all their secular neighbors most of all. What will happen? They will live in a country where their schools are third-rate, because the creationists will suppress education not just for their own kids, but for everyone else’s, too. They will see their school boards populated with the products of such fare as the Creation “Museum”, and they will get to vote in elections where their options are Insane-Fundie-Wackjob vs. Slightly-Less-Crazy-God-Botherer. And the lesser-of-two-evils won’t always win, because their neighbors all think the fundier, the better.

I sympathize because they are all missing the awesomeness of reality for the awfulness of some narrow Bronze Age theocratic bullshit.

But there are also some for whom I have no sympathy at all.

I have zero sympathy for intelligent people who stand before a grandiose monument to lies, an institution that is anti-scientific, anti-rational, and ultimately anti-human, in a place where children are being actively miseducated, an edifice dedicated to an abiding intellectual evil, and choose to complain about how those ghastly atheists are ruining everything.

Those people can just fuck off.

Ken Ham commissions a scientific study

So right away, you know not to trust it. No details are given, we are simply told that “a major study he commissioned by a respected researcher unveils for the first time in a scientific fashion the startling reasons behind statistics that show two-thirds of young people in evangelical churches will leave when they move into their 20s”. That’s actually a nice result from my perspective…so it’s too bad that I can’t believe what he claims.

Also, since it is Ken Ham, he knows exactly what the problem is and what we need to do to keep more kids in the faith.

The book explores a number of reasons for the findings, but Ham sees one overarching problem that is related to how churches and parents have taught youth to understand the Genesis account of creation.

Ham — who believes in a literal six-day creation that happened 6,000 to 10,000 years ago — says the church opened a door for the exodus of youth, beginning in the 19th century, when it began teaching that “the age of the Earth is not an issue as long as you trust in Jesus and believe in the resurrection and the Gospel accounts.”

I get it. His “study” is actually propaganda for his “museum”.

Don’t go down this road, BBC

I’m warning you. It’s a disaster waiting to build: when the newspapers start reporting creationist versions of stories without questioning them, without providing explanations of the fallacies, and without even bringing in authoritative scientific voices to knock their claims down, all you do is feed the confidence of the creationists. It’s even worse than “he said she said” journalism. That’s exactly what the BBC has done, though, with a piss poor story about attendees at Ken Ham’s preposterous creationist “museum”.

I’m going to be charitable and assume the author intended to hang the creationists with their own words; the quotes from the people going to the “museum” do make them sound like ignorant hicks. In particular, one pull quote — Why is Darwin buried with kings at Westminster Abbey? He’s not a king. — is a great big flashing idiot light, and will be especially noticeable in the UK (hint: they don’t just bury kings in Westminster…unless, of course, Isaac Newton and Herschel and Lyell and many other scientists were crowned when I wasn’t looking).

But still, look at the article as a creationist would. It’s going to go in a scrapbook or on a wall of reviews at the “museum”, and the gomers will stroll through, read it, and nod approvingly. Those quotes affirm their own beliefs; all they’ll see is that the BBC approvingly quoted sentiments they share. And there will be readers in England, even, who will be oblivious to the very understated sarcasm, and will be cheered further in their support of creationism. And other reporters will see that as a perfectly reasonable way to write a news story, and the plague of bland reporting will spread.

This part was simply disingenuous.

President and founder Ken Ham stayed resolutely silent about the fossil, called Darwinius masillae, which scientists believe was linked to an early human ancestor.

I’m sorry, but if you go to the Answers in Genesis web site, Darwinius masillae is featured top center in a big full color banner. To claim that Ham was resolute or silent is false: he’s been lying noisily and frantically about the fossil record.

Trust me, it’s been happening over here. Every article about creationism needs to eschew the subtleties and pound hard on the obvious, that creationism is bunk and its proponents are ignorant, because the creationists don’t get subtlety.

Getting tired of Ray Comfort’s silly blog?

Ray has always been good for hours of hilarity — he writes amazingly stupid stuff. But now Ray has competition: Eric Hovind has a blog! It’s not quite as insane as Ray’s, but it does have more evil and stupidity.

For example, Eric likes a poem that he quotes — it’s a crude racist ditty that, I’m told, you can also find on the Stormfront web site. It’s written as if by some caricature of an immigrant, and ends like this:

We think America darn good place!
Too darn good for the white man race.
If they no like us, they can scram,
Got lots of room in Pakistan ..

Hovind has been shown that some of the statistics he used to justify vilifying immigrants were wrong, he’s admitted it, but he still likes the poem. That tells you a lot about him, right there.

On the evil side, he has a post called “The Evoluiton Hypothisis” [sic, sic]. He uses a diagram of what he calls the scientific method to argue against evolution’s status as a scientific theory.

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I don’t much care for the diagram — it’s too rigid in its simplistic model of how science works, and it perpetuates the misleading idea that hypotheses gradually become theories (usually, theories emerge to explain large bodies of information already accumulated, and don’t slowly expand up out of single hypotheses) and that theories become laws if they’re confirmed enough. But I’ll let it slide… you’ll find many similar diagrams in introductory biology texts.

Where Hovind is stupidly wrong is that he looks at that diagram, and baldly claims that the “concept of evolution has never gotten passed the Hypothesis stage”. Ridiculous. All those papers being constantly published in the scientific literature are tests of the theory. The primary research literature is crammed full of tests of evolution, and more keep coming. You have to be profoundly ignorant of the state of biology to be able to make such a ludicrous claim. Oh, wait…he’s a Hovind. Of course he’s deeply ignorant!

Oh, if any of you decide to hang about and laugh at Eric Hovind’s goofy claims, would you mind reminding him now and then that I’m waiting for my iPod Touch?

WhoIsYourCreator saves a soul…for Darwin

Regular readers here may be familiar with WhoIsYourCreator, a creationist who blows through here and The Panda’s Thumb now and then to dump a load of creationist cut-and-paste in the comments. WhoIsYourCreator is actually Julie Haberle, a deranged creationist whose chief accomplishment to date has been to erect foolish billboards all over the place. To date — but now she can take credit for another accomplishment. Her billboards and organization prompted a Christian to dig deeper into this evolution stuff, and what he discovered was that Haberle and others in the creationist movement have been lying all along, which led him to this simple conclusion, which he shared with Ms. Haberle.

I’m simply writing to say ‘Thank You’ and let you know by sharing with you the information I’ve discovered, your organization more than any other entity has been the primary factor in the shedding my faith. Keep up the good work as there is no doubt countless others have and will continue to do the same based on your efforts.

Dishonesty has consequences, and creationists are fundamentally distorting the evidence to fit their desired conclusion. That hurts them when people take a moment to actually examine what they are claiming.

The inanity strikes home sometimes

I got a very annoying announcement on our university listserv today. Among the usual community and campus events, it says:

Please mark your calendars: Don Bierle, PhD in Biology, polar explorer, and former skeptic, shares FaithSearch Discovery at Morris Area High School Sunday, September 27, 6:30 pm. This event is sponsored by Stevens County Ministerial and area churches.

This really pisses me off.

Our local high school has problems. It’s underfunded, it’s academically compromised in many ways, and we were immensely relieved to get our kids out of there. It’s a small school, with a total of two science teachers, and one of them is openly creationist and openly dismissive of evolution in the classroom. If you want a good science education, Morris Area High School is not the place to go right now. And this doesn’t help.

Don Bierle is a creationist, a certifiable liar for Jesus, an evangelical, fundamentalist wackjob who is coming to town to lie to the community and to our kids. This FaithSearch program is undiluted Christian apologetics, and it’s going to be presented in our school building.

I called the school, and they gave me a runaround about how it wasn’t during school hours, and the churches were renting the room. I assumed all that; it doesn’t matter. This is a group promoting propaganda antithetical to the educational message of the public school. They are going to be teaching lies to the Morris community, and the school doesn’t care that their facilities are being used for this ghastly purpose. If it were the KKK asking to rent a room, there would be squawks and rapid backpedaling…but because this group is sponsored by a mix of our local churches, it must be OK.

It isn’t OK. It’s just more evidence that our theistically inclined brethren are happy to corrupt education and spread more ignorance through the area.

Any locals who happen to read this: if the school promotes this at all, if it’s mentioned in announcements, newsletters, or flyers; if our dear little creationist teacher, Mrs. Franey, even whispers a word about this dishonest performance in her class, I hope there are a few of you willing to spread the word and pound on the school hard. This is not the way to improve the academic status of our community. I also hope a few biologists and biology students attend, if it goes on, and puts a little public smackdown on this pious phony.

I’m also a bit peeved that my university sees fit to promote this garbage to our faculty and staff.