In June, the White House will host a UFC fighting event. They’ve already torn out the White House lawn, are building a giant fighting cage to hold all the lights and cameras, and will be placing the Octagon in the center.
It’s historic, don’t you know. Bulbous sweaty men kicking each other in the face is considered a dignified way to celebrate the 250th anniversary of the United States…and it’s not political, it just happens to be held on the president’s 80th birthday.
The president promises us it won’t cost the American taxpayer a thing (I’ve heard that somewhere before). It’s all paid for by special ticket prices — this is not a public event — and sponsorships from Paramount and a crypto company. I’ve never watched UFC, is it all scripted kayfabe bullshit? If so, that would be perfect.
Canadians, Europeans, everyone living in the civilized world outside our borders: are you laughing at us? Because I feel like hiding in shame for some reason.
I wonder of Trump is familiar with the anti-authoritarian message in Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome
No, the UFC is actual fighting, although questions came up last year of whether fighters and refs might be fixing fights to benefit gambling outcomes.
*sigh* You have no idea
(also crying)
“Canadians, Europeans, everyone living in the civilized world outside our borders: are you laughing at us?”
No, but I do look at you pityingly.
It might work better if candidates for the presidency had to pass through Thunderdome before the election.
.
There might be a lot of politicians wearing prostethic limbs… but that is a risk I am willing to take if cadet Bonespur would not bother us.
Next iteration: The president suggests pardons for murderers willing to fight each other with swords.
The country already has the revolting phenomenon of “bumfights”, this is just a further shift of norms.
@birgerjohansson even better would be to have a vote after the term to see if the elected candidate was faithful to his mandate. If they don’t get enough votes, they should end up in prison for fraud.
I like neither prisons not representative democracy, but if that’s what we’ve got…
Mostly, because instead than noting that we’re following in the US steps with enthusiasm, we’re busy feeling superior.
F. O. @ 7
I think Wales or Cornwall have made a law requiring truthfulness, with real consequences for liars.
One thing that’s interesting about Freedom 250(which might make some Canadians think of the heavily advertised Freedom 55 retirement program) is the number of foreign fighters involved. The main event includes Illia Topuria, a Georgian fighter who holds Spanish citizenship. The co-main event is Brazilian fighter Alex Pereira versus France’s Ciryl Gane. There’s even a Canadian fighting, Aiemann Zahabi. (His older brother Firas owns Tristar Gym in Montreal, one of the major MMA training camps). You’d think with Trump’s involvement Dana White would have made the lineup entirely Americans versus Americans. I wonder if we won’t see a giant Trump tantrum if not enough of the Americans fighting win.
“The president promises us it won’t cost the American taxpayer a thing”
Trump has always paid his way. The only time he didn’t pay was when he got Mexico to pay for his wall.
I know that wasn’t funny, but this is not funny anymore.
@7 F.O.
Honestly, kind of like a lot of things, including some basic competence tests for holding office, there are two massive problems – 1. Unless the people are also the ones voting on what the F that means, but sensible people are also involved with making sure that what the people are asking for is not stupid, any such standard will be inevitably gamed. And, 2. What happens when, X number of decades down the line, everything is mostly working, there are no serious problems to solve, but the standard is still being applied, such that you come right back around to, “But, I am a racist, and no one is doing anything for me! The law says you must do something for me!”, or, just as bad, if not maybe worse, the “problems” they are being asked to “solve” have dissolved into literally petty stupid shit, but the law still exists, so people can vote their politicians out because, for example, they have no real problems to solve, but the “people” want them to save their favorite TV show, but they failed to do it?
This is always the problem with open ended concepts of, “Gosh, I really wish we could legislate the ‘right thing’, and make everyone do it!” You either end up with a system, kind of like the current US government is functioning, which no longer gives a F about what people want, and cherry pick their “successes”, and who they are actually working for. I mean, how the F many people in the US really want the main topics of debate in state, or even local, legislations, outside of religious nuts, to be, “Should children be allowed to be married?”, or, “OMG, we can’t let women go topless!”, yet these are major important topics in some places, and your rules/law would literally put, in some places, one or both politicians that “failed” to support banning toplessness, and/or legal child molestation, via marriage, as, “They didn’t do it like we told them they should, so according to the law, they need to go to jail!” And, while extreme, this is a big f-ing problem with such a system – people are sometimes bloody stupid about what they think is “important”, and thus what such politicians need to be held accountable.
Remember, we may think we have a handle on what “should” be done, and why, and what makes sense, but a) we are still human, and there may be things for which we are just plain stupid about, and b) on many of those subjects the majority would not come even close to agreeing on what are the priorities, or what the outcome should be, or have the damn clue, even when wrong about something, that what they are demanding is actually a disaster.
This is the whole reason why no one has ever come up with a better system (in general). The ones that do it better actually have set more sensible standards, placed better limits on some things, etc., but no one has, or likely ever could, come up with a way to prevent scammers from convincing the public that, “Heh, you want this!”, seemingly delivering on it, because it seems like it might fix a problem, and finding themselves right back where we are now, 50 years later, as more and more scams get pulled, and the majority fail to realize its all been a scam. Case in point – ever single country that is doing democracy better than we are, but have still managed to import our right wing idiocy, via scams, back room trade deals, and manipulations (which worked so well in the US, they decided to export them to the rest of the world).
So, yeah, lets “do better”, definitely. Pass laws, and laws to protect those laws, that make a lot of this stupid shit less feasible in the future. But, we need to be real careful with open ended stuff that not just can be, but will be gamed by the very people we think it will somehow keep out, or let us get rid of easier. Because, frankly, it won’t do either by itself, and it could be used to undermine the whole mess again.
utterly undignified, but very appropriate for where the US is now, I think.
Also, in the spirit of classicist pedantry, I should point out that the “circuses” part of “bread and circuses” refers to chariot racing, not gladiatorial contests. In fact the chariot races were a much more raucous, chaotic and indulgent affair than the gladiator shows, which were actually quite a formal occasion where you had to wear your formal citizen’s toga and sit according to rank and class.
I would hope the fascist toddler goes all the way with his attempt to be a modern Commodus, though, and takes to the arena himself. Anything to bring on the congestive heart failure.
Per WIkipedia:
So UFC = Paramount Skydance = David Ellison, billionaire son of Larry Ellison. These are the jerks that canceled Colbert to make Dumpster happy and get their merger approved.
The no bread part of the title is way too correct.
I’ve lately been noticing how poor in real terms the US population has been getting.
On the West coast, in all the major cities and many of the smaller ones, housing has hit a record high in terms of cost as a percentage of income. Rents have also gone up as well because if you can’t buy a house, you rent housing.
The age of a first time home buyer is now 40 years up from 28 a few decades ago.
Lately, gasoline prices have also hit a historic high, due to the ongoing Iran war mistake.
A week ago, while I was getting fuel, the vehicle in front of me was a new giant pickup, a Dodge Ram.
The guy filled his tank and it came to $150. For one tank of gas.
I would hate to be a young person in the USA today.
The present looks very dismal and the future looks like…what future?. There isn’t one worth living in.
They need Borat as a guest to bring some dignity to the proceedings.
I’m waiting for trump to start renting out space on the White House lawn for a trailer park.
robro @14
I canceled Paramount+ (and HBO Max for same reason) so sadly I may have to miss out on the gladiator fights. Not that I was ever too much into sweaty dudes crotch-sitting each other until one taps out.
I like a good street race (except for that boring Monaco GP parade). I might watch the cringey named “Freedom 250 Grand Prix of Washington, D.C.”, but IndyCar isn’t really my thing. They stole Will Buxton. Bastards. Still, I would rather watch a silly force-fit into the schedule IndyCar race than a ridiculous MMA spectacle on the White House lawn.
On the plus side the tickets didn’t sell well. The good tickets are gong to VIPs and the military while the bad tickets will be free. This seems weird but the UFC doesn’t really make money from tickets, they get their money selling events to networks and pay per view. So insuring the close seats would be filled by packing them with military personal both makes the event look better and is good PR.
@17 christoph: Trump would never let those people live that close to him. More likely he converts the park area around the White House into a golf course.
I wonder if Joe Rogan will have any involvement in this. He was kinda backpedalling from MAGA due to stuff like ICE raids. But MMA is kinda his thing right?
I do kinda miss the smaller headed less grotesque Joe Rogan of NewsRadio. He was great for that goofy character. Grows on you if you can forget the present. Who would have known what he would become at the time?
Because I feel like hiding in shame for some reason
Since Nixon was pardoned.
No circus for you either, it’s only for VIPs.
UFC is real fighting. The head of UFC is pro-Trump, and we know about Paramount. I used to like MMA, but now I can’t.
Submoron @ 16
Hear, hear!
.
Cartomancer@ 13
The rule of Commodus is often quoted as the start of the decline of the empire – in fact, a 1960s film set at the time of his rule is titled “The Fall Of The Roman Empire“.
Considering the modern meaning of “commode” and 45/47s obsession with bathrooms we can only hope there are no further parallels.
Thank goodness I don’t have to attend, this would be unbearably unentertaining.
He destroyed the rose garden, destroyed the west wing, destroyed the oval office with gold painted plaster of paris tchotchkes and how has destroyed the white house front lawn for a bunch of knuckle-dragging mouth-breathing pro-wrestlers —
ETTD
I am now compelled to refer to him as:
tacky trailer-trash taco t.rump and his tiny toxic toadstool
He has made this the most powerful third-world country in the world
I saw this mentioned on Mastodon and paid it no further heed as I honestly thought this was a joke and pic was an AI generated meme.
Thinking about PZ’s title, it just seems to indicate that:
tacky trailer-trash taco t.rump and his tiny toxic toadstool
could be a circus act!
They are athletes, and I bet some are smarter than you are.
Also, UFC is not wrestling, it’s mixed martial arts.
And there are 3 divisions for women fighters.
Yes, laughing in Australia too….
[although frighteningly we have our own home-grown fascists/wannabe MAGA – One Nation]
OK, had to share: https://www.reuters.com/world/asia-pacific/viral-fame-spares-donald-trump-buffalo-eid-sacrifice-bangladesh-2026-05-27/
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DHAKA, May 27 (Reuters) – A rare albino buffalo in Bangladesh – nicknamed “Donald Trump” for its distinctive blond tuft – has been spared from Eid al-Adha sacrifice after a last-minute government intervention, a Home Ministry official said on Wednesday.
The nearly 700-kg (1,543 lb) animal had already been sold for ritual slaughter when authorities stepped in, citing security concerns after a surge of public interest ahead of Thursday’s festival.
Home Minister Salahuddin Ahmed ordered the buffalo be spared, the buyer refunded, and the animal moved to the national zoo in Dhaka.
“At the last moment, the decision was taken to spare the buffalo from sacrifice due to security concerns and the unusual level of public interest,” a ministry official said.
Well, the demographic that supports him the most is White Trash so this tracks. I’m sure Vince McMahon is somewhere brooding that it’s not going to be a WWE event instead.
cartomancer @13
And if the depictions in film are in any way accurate, they were no doubt much more fun to watch. A modern day equivalent would be fitting NASCAR vehicles with rocket launchers…
F.O. @8 and Nom de Plume @30, you are laughing or feeling superior because you are superior. And, the US is a laughable failure. So, good.
It’s time for some more civilized, superior country or countries to take over “leadership of the free world” and be the superpower. Since almost everyone qualifies as more civilized that us, have at it!
raven @15, you are right. Also, groceries, electricity, heat, and education are also too expensive for people with “middle-class incomes” to afford (and groceries are about to get a lot more expensive.)
So, Americans can’t afford housing, food, electricity, heat, and education. We’re what used to be call a “Third World” country, definitely a failed state.
What a laughable claim. And not just risible, but beyond even hyperbolic.
Also, not to make the etymological fallacy, but ‘third world’ defined nations that remained non-aligned with either NATO (First World) or the Communist Bloc (Second World).
FWIW, here is data: https://fragilestatesindex.org/
Laughing at HIM, yes. Not laughing at you. Fucking horrified in fact at what murica is forcing upon us all, again, just so they don’t have to have a woman as a president.
Re: raven @15
I’m sure all of that is absolutely true. And yet inevitably you hear actual Americans lecture Canadians about how they have no idea how much better life is in the USA, and how we should ditch our socialism for freedom, baby!
The sad truth is, propaganda works, and it has been an ongoing project for (probably) longer than the USA has been a nation. It really does not matter what the actual lived experience of people is, there will always be those who ignore reality completely, and insist the truth is something else. I am reminded of a chapter from the third book of the “His Dark Materials” series by Philip Pullman, when Lyra and Will go to the Land of the Dead, and it’s an obviously terrible place, but you have those conditioned by decades of religious indoctrination claiming it’s a land of milk and honey, and only the faithful can possibly understand how amazing it is.
As I was growing up in the 1980s and ’90s, it was quite scary to me how absolutely certain Americans seemed to be about the inevitable superiority of their nation and way of life, how ritualized and universal the expressions of acknowledging that greatness were, and how broadly that message was spread amongst the populace, irrespective of age, race, sex, class, religion, political beliefs, etc. And now those chickens have really come home to roost. Moreover, it is always shocking to me how some of the people who should really know better (perhaps because they were inside the American war machine and saw its true nature – what its true purpose actually is…and it has VERY little to do with making Americans safer – or because they were persecuted by a politicized, cronyist “justice” system for actually doing the morally right thing when presented with real American evil, despite the potential for legal implications…oftentimes both) still insist that these present-day issues are but a minor setback, as the nation has so much going for it that nobody can really mess it up all that much. It doesn’t matter how smart you are, or how much direct experience you have with the dark side of American hegemony…this is faith we’re trying to overcome, not reason, and faith NEEDS no reason.
Propaganda works, but not always as intended: https://www.reuters.com/investigations/inside-unraveling-us-diplomacy-under-trump-2026-05-21/
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A REUTERS SPECIAL REPORT
Inside the unraveling of U.S. diplomacy under Trump
Donald Trump’s threats, personal envoys and hollowed‑out U.S. embassies are reshaping Washington’s presence in the world. Allies from Europe to Asia are rewriting the rules of engagement – ignoring the president’s rhetoric and forging new diplomatic channels to manage a U.S. foreign policy driven increasingly by personalities, not institutions.
By Andrew R.C. Marshall, Humeyra Pamuk, John Shiffman, Gram Slattery, John Irish, Tim Kelly and Andrea Shalal
May 21, 20268:00 PM GMT+10 Updated May 24, 2026
@18. Hemidactylus : “I like a good street race (except for that boring Monaco GP parade).”
Monaco is special and iconic with its history and atmosphere and the Saturday qually is the day to watch. usually. There can be chaos and drama and a lot of excitement still especially when it rains eg Panis winning in the 1990’s and, of course Senna vs Prost in 1984 and Senna vs Mansell in 1992 to name just a trio of many other examples. Sometiems the extreme difficulty of passing makes for much more drama.. and special wins eg Danny Ric in 2017.
timgueguen @10:
From the Infinite Thread last year:
* The thread has a follow-up two comments later.