I might expose my secret identity if I visited a bar!


I read this Guide to Pairing Your Comics & Beer a bit differently: I have opinions on beer, but not such strong opinions on comics. So I looked through the list for the beer I’d order, and determined from that which comic book hero I must be.

It was easy. No question at all.

I’m Batman.

Although I could be the Green Lantern in a pinch.

Comments

  1. garrettcurley says

    Shit, I’m Iron Man! But I should have known: am a big fan of Elon Musk, a.k.a. the real life Tony Stark.

  2. Brownian says

    This is stupid.

    You drink wine when eating comics. Red if you’re served a graphic novel.

  3. peterh says

    There seems to be no brew associated with Gyro Gearloose. Nor his little light bulb companion (not named by Carl Barks).

  4. Private Ogvorbis, OM says

    And I must protest! There is no beer listed for Little Lulu! Or the Gene Autry comics!

    This must be a plot by calendarists to ruin my Friday!

  5. KillJoy says

    Huh.Guess I would have to be Batman too. Closest to the styles of beers I like drinking. Though, to be fair, I have a love affair with beer in general. Good beer. I make my own beer. I rhaposidize about beer at great length. I own tomes on the making, tasting and history of beer. I am all super heroes rolled up into one, horrible, super powered abomination. Or maybe I’m Jesus. He’s a super hero…right? XD

    KJ

  6. sundiver says

    Since neither Fat Tire nor any of the Flying Dog brews are listed I guess I’m not affiliated with any comic. It’s bad enough being a godless heathen, but damn, I guess I’m a total fugitive from society.

  7. What a Maroon says

    @KillJoy,

    Jesus was more into winemaking.

    Though to be fair, he was a product of his time and place. Maybe if he came back today, he’d get into homebrewing.

  8. quidam says

    I’m clearly Daredevil, and I suspect it’s also the beer that superhero, Dennis the Menace, would drink (the Beano Dennis, not the cutesy Merkin one)

    I’d hang around with the X folk though, and I’d definitely dress up in Green once in a while.

  9. Thomathy, now angrier and feminister says

    I’m disturbed by the decided lake of beers of any sophistication. Where are the old world white beers, the wheat beers or the beers with fruit?

    I has a sad, a gut-wrenching sad, at the inclusion of disgusting swill like Samuel Adams and Blue. Ugh!

    Whatever, superheroes don’t deserve Früli or Hoegaarden or Delirium or anything right and good. (Yeah, I have a thing for Belgian beer.)

  10. ajbjasus says

    Brownian @11 Just trying to broaden the cultural reference base beyond the USA

    Quidam @ 16 Merkin ? A pubic Wig ?

  11. KillJoy says

    What a Maroon @ Numbah 14:

    Hmmm. You have a point there.
    Though I do often FEEL like Jesus when Im brewing.
    Watch in amazement as I turn this water into beer!
    You uhhh…you might have to wait a bit though. Magic isn’t quite as magic as it used to be. XD

    KJ

  12. David Marjanović says

    What about the teetotallers among us? Are we Lex Luthor?

    Thomathy @17: Delirium is a beer?

    Yes, Delirium tremens is a Belgian beer with hideous pink elephants on the crates.

  13. Thomathy, now angrier and feminister says

    Yes, Pteryxx. It’s Belgian, more properly Delirium Tremens and Delirium Nocturn. Interestingly named and interesting to taste. They’re strong beer, but they’re not fortified.

    Interesting comic …

  14. anatosuchus says

    It appears that hard cider is more… robust on this side of the Atlantic. At 7% or more you’ll get more than “a buzz” in relatively short order, so I’d go less with Spidey and more with, say, Lobo.

  15. walton says

    I don’t like any beer; I’ve never tried one that didn’t taste awful to me, and it also makes me feel ill very quickly. Cider is even worse. (Gin and tonic is my preference as far as alcohol is concerned. Or red wine. But I rarely drink at all these days.)

    But then, I don’t like comics either. So I guess it’s win-win all round. Or something.

  16. says

    So I looked through the list for the beer I’d order, and determined from that which comic book hero I must be.

    It was easy. No question at all.

    I’m Batman.

    Have you ever tasted Young’s Double Chocolate? I have, once. I love chocholate, and I love beer. But this stuff is, is, well, it’s just not Batman.

    (Yeah, I have a thing for Belgian beer.)

    +1

    Yes, Delirium tremens is a Belgian beer with hideous pink elephants on the crates.

    And in your head afterwards, apparently.

  17. Brownian says

    Where are the old world white beers, the wheat beers or the beers with fruit?

    I don’t read comics because I’m much too busy shortening my life with this. Served with a slice of lemon to ward off the scurvy.

    What about the teetotallers among us? Are we Lex Luthor?

    Maybe you’re one of the Fabulous Furry Freak Brother.

    “Smoking grass and drinking beer is like pissing into the wind.”

  18. says

    Hell, I wouldn’t mind being any of those except Daredevil, Wolverine (Labbatt’s? Srsly?) and the Flash (hard lemonades don’t really do it for me), and I prefer beer to cider. But when it came time to order, I think I’d be Green Lantern (got a bottle of that in the fridge, souvenir of my last trip south of the border — can’t get most American crafts up here, though the product flowing from Chamblis makes up for the lack. Is there a Quebec-themed superhero?)

  19. Rev. BigDumbChimp says

    Well my beer tastes are extremely broad but from the list I’d have to go with Dogfish Head. And that’s probably because they’re one of my favorite breweries. Though I’m a sucker for nearly anything Belgian beerwise.

    I wonder what would go with Cerberus?

    Actually, don’t answer that.

  20. Alex the Pretty Good says

    So an atheist, a liberal and an evolutionary biologist walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says “Hey PZ, the usual?”

    ——-

    Guess I’m Tony Stark. But only if my Chimay is Blue.

    But why did that article call it “classy foreign beer”? It’s just a tasty local beer in my experience.

  21. Predator Handshake says

    Eamon @27: Four Loko is not just lemonade; imagine that someone alcoholized each flavor of SweeTart and dumped one of those 3-foot tubes of Pixie Stix in there. The flavor ends up being what I imagine a synesthete experiences when zie looks at a neon light.

    If I had to pick one, I guess I’d be Ghost Rider. Dead Guy is an anytime, any mood beer for me. I prefer Rogue’s Shakespeare Stout but I don’t read comics much; does anyone have any ideas for which superhero that would go with?

  22. nichrome says

    Have you ever tasted Young’s Double Chocolate? I have, once. I love chocholate, and I love beer. But this stuff is, is, well, it’s just not Batman.

    Agree — I think a better beer for Batman would be Rogue Brutal Bitter

  23. says

    I’m another Spiderman. I’m not a fan of bitter flavors, so I don’t care for most beers.

    Though if the Dogfish Head happens to be Festina Peche, I’ll happily join the X-men!

  24. M Groesbeck says

    On behalf of my hometown (also the home of Comic-Con International!) I think it’s completely unacceptable that only one San Diego County beer is mentioned — and that one mostly for the name. I mean, sure, Stone’s Arrogant Bastard is nice…but what about Green Flash barleywine? (The “green” would match the Hulk, even.) Alesmith has “Horny Devil” and “Old Numbskull”; Lost Abbey has “Inferno” and “Judgment Day”. And everyone from Ballast Point to Karl Strauss to, yes, Stone and Green Flash does IPAs.

  25. madphd says

    No way is Wolverine Lebatt Blue… I think they may have switched him with Green Lantern.

    Ghost rider for me!

  26. megs226 says

    At home in New England I’m Captain America. When I go below the Mason-Dixon line to visit my friends, I turn into Superman.

    Haha, fun!

  27. noastronomer says

    Apparently I’m Spiderman. Captain America. Daredevil. Iron Man. Ghost Rider. The Hulk. X-Men (what all of them?). Batman. And The Green Lantern.

    But not The Flash or Superman.

    Though I could be Woverine in a pinch.

    Mike.

  28. pooder says

    I am a Real Bastard(tm) ’cause my mother and my father weren’t married when I was born . . . so I guess that means I’m Green Lantern. But I LIKE Young’s Stout SO much: can I be Batman half-time? Sure I can; like religion, comic books are Totally Made Up . . . .

    I’m Green Batman!!

  29. What a Maroon says

    I’m not a fan of bitter flavors, so I don’t care for most beers.

    As far as I’m concerned, the bitterer the betterer.

    I guess because it brings back fond memories of my Marax days.

  30. frankb says

    I guess I’m not manly enough. I like Sam Adams and hard cider, though I do appreciate a good scotch import.

  31. says

    I have no problem with bitter taste in a heavy beer like stout, but in a lighter beer, a bitter aftertaste just makes me hate the beer. In the past few years I’ve been favoring Belgian-style Tripels. Allaghash makes a nice tripel in numbered batches, but it only comes in 750ml bottles which is a bit much for me. River Horse makes Tripel Horse, which is almost as good, and comes in sensible-sized bottles.

  32. greame says

    Wolverine would be better off with another Canadian beer. Kokanee maybe. Or La Fin Du Monde. Moosehead?

    Labatt Blue and Molson Canadian are terrible beers.

  33. darrenpardee says

    What sweet side to Batman? There’s nothing sweet about dressing up a boy in vibrant colors and dangling him out in front of you as a decoy.
    Nevertheless, if you’re going to apply a stout to Batman, I think you need something a bit bolder, something that’ll put hair on your chest and overpower a stout’s sweetness with strong roasty flavors. Great Divide Brewing Co’s Espresso Oak Aged Yeti Imperial Stout would do quite nicely.

  34. says

    Brownian @35: Now *that’s* a low blow.

    Yeah @51: Give Wolverine a Fin Du Monde.

    (And speaking of Belgian-styles: there must be some super hero to go with Sapient Tripp).

  35. Dhorvath, OM says

    Hey, I like the Hulk, I like the Barley Wines too, this author must be psychic or something.

  36. Rev. BigDumbChimp says

    Cerebus: Anything in a bottle. Or can. Or navel.

    Good call. I was thinking of later Cerebus and Sim… which… nevermind. Not this thread.

  37. Dhorvath, OM says

    Greame,
    Fin du Monde is nothing like Moosehead and Kokanee both of which to my palate may as well be Blue or Canadian. I second Eamon Knight.

  38. Rev. BigDumbChimp says

    Well since we are on beer…

    Anyone in Charleston or near it needs to come to Brewvivial.

    One of the best beer festivals I’ve attended. Lots of top of their game breweries and brewers bringing their super small and select brews. And A bunch of awesome food trucks.

  39. Just Visiting says

    Chas @60…
    Look for something made with black currants or elderberries. Reinheitsgebot be damned!

  40. jonmoles says

    I can’t really stand Superman or Capt. America, but Yuengling and Sam Adams are my faves from the list on that page (and among my faves period).

  41. says

    I don’t drink. Superhero-wise, I identify with Alfred. I’ll let others run around in tights and shit.
    Also, I like to get out in the sun once in a while, and those masks would cause my face to tan unevenly. Bit of a giveaway, there.

  42. 'Tis Himself, OM says

    I guess I must be Green Lantern because I like Arrogant Bastard Ale. Arrogant of me, I suppose.

  43. evader says

    Aaah, the taste of American beer…

    *vomits in his mouth a lil*

    Leave it to the Czechs and Germans please ^^

  44. Rip Steakface says

    …But I don’t drink…

    Does that mean I don’t get to be a superhero? I’m sad now.

  45. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Dang, I’m not a superhero (except to the Redhead), as I’m an Oatmeal Stout guy.

  46. Marcus Hill says

    It has heartened me in recent years to see the trend in the colonies away from mass produced tasteless piss-weak lagers and towards wider availability of proper ales (many of those I’ve tasted are really good). If the trend continues, you may one day be able to have as wide a variety of real ales with proper distinctive flavours as we have in the UK.

  47. ChasCPeterson says

    There sure are a lot of excellent microbreweries out there. Just right here, on relatively tiny Long Island (something like 240×30 km), we’ve got Brooklyn, Kelso, Blue Point, Great South Bay, Southampton, Fire Island, and Barrier (all of which brew delicious ales and are on draft at my local at one time or another (18 taps and lots of turnover)), plus several smaller breweries and brewpubs that don’t distribute as widely.

    I am not personally fond of the sourish distinctive Belgian yeast flavor, so I am usually drinking hoppy IPAs or dark browns, porters, or stouts. On the other hand, I have thoroughly enjoyed many a Sam or Yuengling with dinner, and I do not dislike Budweiser (started out on Iron City and back in the day drank generic ‘BEER’). Why, even Miller Lite has its place (a hot summer day playing softball), IMO.

    For superhero, Howard the Duck (Trapped in a World He Never Made!).

  48. evilDoug says

    Humph! All the drawings are good guys (aren’t they? I’m not too up on this stuff. Until recently I thought a “graphic novel” was fictional literature with explicit descriptions of sex or violence.)

    What is an evil person supposed to drink?

  49. chigau (違う) says

    evilDoug
    My favored beer is 6% abv and costs less that $1(canadian) per can.
    Does that answer your question?

  50. evilDoug says

    chigau,
    Thank you. Sometimes I feel so alone (sharp aspiration, small sob) Jeeze – I’m gonna blow my image that way.

    Your brand? I didn’t know there was a beer that cheap up here.

    I used to drink Terrible by Unibroue in Quebec, but, alas, they don’t make it any more.