It’s easy — just follow the link from The Countess’s blog, read about weird supernatural monsters, leave a comment, and you’re entered in a drawing for an anthology of erotic horror stories.
Yeah, erotic horror. I think it’s supposed to leave you all hot and bothered in a state of tension … not erotic horror like retelling a woman’s sexual history in a church service, which is horrifying in an “eww, ick” and “cover the children’s ears, Martha!” and “ooooh, Harold, I come over all tremulous just thinking about it” sort of way. Sanctimonious dunderheads need not apply.
You know, I hear about this crap every once in a while. What is it about “outing” sin in front of the congregation that is so attractive? Is it their version of porn or something? Large scale gossip? They must love dirty underwear.
The only bit I don’t get is why it took her so long to leave that church of judgemental, self-righteous prudes.
I suspect that some of them have such boring little lives that this sort of public humiliation ceremony is somewhat of a social highlight.
You gotta love it when real Christians show the world what being a real Christian is all about.
Yeah some of the “no shit sherlock” type blame is her own stupidity in joining that church to begin with.
Still, what was that whole thing in Matthew 7:1 ?
anthology of erotic horror stories
Sometimes I think all *my* erotic stories are horror. :-(
(rimshot)
Thank you. Actually, I wasn’t joking. :-(
(rimshot)
Stop that!
not erotic horror like retelling a woman’s sexual history in a church service,
At first I thought you were referring to the upcoming holiday celebration and the myth associated with it: soon Christian churches accross the world will be delving into the sexual history or lack thereof of some probably apocryphal woman who lived a good 2000 years ago. Speaking of horror.
Sounds like that woman refused to go along with blackmail. I suppose she could make a counter offer… “I’ll marry the bloke if each of you church elders submit to receiving one good kick from me.” How could they refuse? They get what they ostensibly want, and the suffering will be good for their souls, right?
I like the Countess’s blog.
So stay away from crazy-ass churches, lady!
These people are petty, cruel, prurient little despots. Rotten, hypocritical thugs who never cease to boast about their superior morality. Sickening.
The church thing is very simple: loss of a member = loss of donations.
Gotta punish the heathens for taking money away from the church.
Thanks for the link, PZ. There are two erotic horror stories in the anthology, and my story “Sweet Spot” is one of them. The other stories are erotic romance with a Halloween theme. My other story in the book, “The Face In The Mirror”, is paranormal erotic romance. This is also an e-book. You get it in electronic form – an Acrobat file, to be exact.
Everyone interested in the contest, make sure you leave your comments at the Deadly Vixens blog. Deadly Vixens is hosting the contest, not me. And check out the blog. Great stuff over there. Not what you’re used to reading here at Pharyngula. ;)
“On January 4, my sins will be told to the church, publicly, with my children sitting in the church and my friends,” Hancock said.
I don’t see why she has to bring her children to see her publicly humiliated. And her true friends, if she has any, will not be there to see it either.
There is a comment section on the Church and their “outing” party here
I recall another “public shaming” case in the media from about 25 years ago (IIRC, the woman in that case was suing her former church for invasion of privacy). Sure, if you don’t want to obey the church rules (however stupid) you should probably leave that church — and the church should then leave you alone, end of story. But for some churches that’s not good enough: no one is allowed to leave of themselves, they have to be publicly kicked out, for cause.
I’m scared stiff…
Hey, she should look on the bright side – at least she’s not being stoned to death, right? Progress!
From the link posted by Rev. BDC:
“Our love for you compels us to pursue that which is best for you,” the letter starts. Stating she is “involved in a sexually immoral relationship with a man who is not your husband,” it adds that such behavior can be repented and forgiven by God.
Yep, we love you so much that we’ll be cruel to you until you see things our way. That’s got “abusive relationship” written all over it. *puke*
The comments to that story are fairly horrific.
I think she should show up on the day of her outing with a wheelbarrow full of rocks, and start passing them out as a statement.
Only if she’s brave, though. A physical Poe could be lethal.
Here’s Quiet Desparation’s rimshot for you Synchronium. (Technically, it’s not a rimshot, but a sting, at least according to Wikipedia.)
What absolutely repulsive people these church-goers are.
They should have shoes (and possibly ‘violence never solves anything’-spouting hippies) thrown at their heads.
Fixed the redundancy.
I wonder how many of the deacons/elders in that church enjoy carnal knowledge of potatoes? Or rubber accessories? Or crystal meth-fueled gay sex binges with paid boy-toys? The loudest ones are the people with the biggest kinks.
It makes me want to mail something nasty to the church. Maybe a year’s subscription to a swinger’s magazine?
Jay @ 10:
I don’t see why she has to bring her children to see her publicly humiliated. And her true friends, if she has any, will not be there to see it either.
She’s 49. Her children are, presumably, adults now, unless she had waited until her mid-30’s to have children. I would assume that they’re also members of that church.
This comment on that article is rather telling
“Objective fact”? And what’s so “disturbing” about church-shopping (other than the fact that it’s still going to a church at all ;-)) Imagine! She’s actually sort of thinking for herself instead of being a total sheep! Horrifying!
I don’t see why she has to bring her children to see her publicly humiliated. And her true friends, if she has any, will not be there to see it either.
Read the second article: her kids are ~20yo, and presumably make up their own minds what to do on Sunday morning. Maybe they’ll decide to go church-shopping too, after seeing their Mom publicly shamed by the control-freaks at Grace. Apparently, she joined while still in the midst of her divorce, which fits a known pattern of people turning to religion (for the support of a community, if nothing else) in a personal crisis. Unfortunately, she picked a “community” that’s a bit of a cult, apparently.
Dianne @5, that was my first thought too!
And I’ve always said the “miracle” of the virgin birth was pointless–what good is a miracle that has no witnesses? If miracles are supposed to prove the power of god, doesn’t someone have to be able to attest to them? Surely no one would just take the woman’s word for her virginity!
And yet, somehow, the Catholic Church has built an enormous cult around just that notion.
The comments over on that site are absolutely disgusting. A bunch of morons are saying “it’s in the bible, how can we ignore it? If she doesn’t like it, too bad.”
As if they don’t ignore half the other stuff in that waste of paper.
Wait a second. So Reverend Christmas is going to tell the congregation she’s been having sex with her boyfriend. And??? Doesn’t everyone already know that?
Do they have photos or videotapes? Do they know the intimate details of what they do in the bedroom?
So he’ll give a lame sermon about sin and hellfire. And the kids will still love her. He’s a bully.
If she’s up for some serious brinksmanship, all she needs to do is announce to the congregation, “You can go ahead with my public shaming, but you need to ask yourselves what I might know about your own ‘immorality.’ Would you like me to discuss that with the press?”
Even if she knows nothing at all, it’s a pretty good bet that at least some of these pious, god-fearing christians have major skeletons in their closets. I’m guessing they’d suddenly find it in their hearts to forgive her enough to let her quietly leave.
“I think aside from the sins of the flesh and the sins of pride and unrepentance, the most disturbing thing about it all is that she can go church-shopping and actually find one that suits her form of sin and delusion!”
As if those in the Grace Community Church did not also go “church shopping” for one which practiced a version of Christianity which they preferred. You can’t continuously make a big song and dance about how faith is a “choice” to believe and everything comes down to “choice,” and then sniff indignantly about “church-shopping.” Presumably the woman who is now being condemned had no problem with such condemnations until it was her turn.
When Christians argue over which interpretation of the Bible is more reasonable, it always sounds like astrologers arguing over the proper way to interpret Mars being in the House of Jupiter. You can follow along and pick out the side which is saying something that makes more sense — but the fact that it makes sense is completely unrelated to whether or not there’s a “correct” way to do astrology.
“You can go ahead with my public shaming, but you need to ask yourselves what I might know about your own ‘immorality.’ Would you like me to discuss that with the press?”
Like this?
Actually, I’d suggest she attend the service and offer her testimony in all the graphic details. She should go into great detail about all the positions she and her boyfriend did it in, all the toys and accessories they used, and all the passionate dirty language they said to each other. Maybe even produce a dildo or a used condom as evidence of her sin.
Those church folks do love a good testimonial. And although they would all act horrified, everyone knows they would secretly savor each moment of it. Buncha sexually repressed perverts the lot of em.
I guess what really has the church folks upset is that she is pretty hot (assuming that’s her picture on the second article). The church ladies probably want her married off so they won’t percieve her as a threat to their own marriages. And the men can’t tolerate an unavailable woman who gets them all hot and bothered. I bet if she gave the preacher a peice, this would all go away.
Oh christ on a sitck. I grew up in Jacksonville, Florida, and this story sounds just about right. It’s essentially southern Georgis, but with that special brand of holier-than-thout-redneck that’s particular to the sunshine state. You have no idea what a cesspool of moronic, hillbilly, good ol’ boy, rightesouness Jacksonville represents. And sadly, they’re continually trying to pass themselves off as this paragon of shining southern urbanity. Anyone who attended or watched Superbowl XXXIX wasn’t fooled.
I was into erotic horror, but we broke up before she did me a “mischief”.
What is it about “outing” sin in front of the congregation that is so attractive?
It gives the other congregants good “leads” in case they’re all alone at 4 A.M.
Maybe Walton should go to this sort of church…
At least one of the early commentators on that site is praising the lord for finding people without sin in the area. Tis a miracle indeed.
My girlfriend’s grandfather lives in Mandarin, and though he is in his 90s he might just whup those church elders for that level of jackassery. And I might be tempted to go help out. What a bunch of puerile stone-casters!
I agree with Jay @#28. Not only should she attend and testify, maybe she can embroider a really ornate, scarlet ‘A’ on her chest so that everyone knows her sin.
Nutbars.
“the most disturbing thing about it all is that she can go church-shopping and actually find one that suits her form of sin and delusion!””
Yeah, you should be stuck in the church you were born in for life. Heck, how else are some of those churches going to retain members?
Further evidence for Christian morality being an oxymoron.
Ugh, I can’t wait to move away from Jacksonville. As much as I enjoy my little corner away from the fundies, this kind of crap is in the news all the time and I can’t hardly pick up the newspaper without my eyes rolling out from the fundie religiousness that permeates the thing.
mothworm is completely right about the region, and it’s pretty dang sad.
“I don’t see why she has to bring her children to see her publicly humiliated. ”
Why would it be humiliating? To her, at any rate. If this were me, I’d have my family up front centre to hear the horrific charges that I might have fallen in love with someone. As retarded as this church apparently is, I’ll bet that half the people are wondering so what.