Learn how not to answer science questions

This might be one of those “framing” exercises: Science Creative Quarterly wants your science questions. The catch is that they’ll be answered by Bill Hick the Science Prick (Ooo-eee, late-night Pharyngula is on an off-color roll, isn’t it?). There’s a prize, though! The humiliation and abuse might be worth it when you give the children’s book you win for it to some little boy or girl.

Just don’t tell them how you won it. You want them to look up to you, you know.


  1. Michael says

    Winning “Enda the dinosaur who didn’t know she was extinct” might just be too much for me to handle existantially speaking. I’m not up for such brain bending stuff so late at night. If it were, “Dembski, the guy who didn’t know he wasn’t a scientist” then I might put up a question or two.

  2. says

    Did you know that if you rearrange the letters in “scientist” a very certain way, you can spell the word “moron”?

    That should keep you busy for the next forty years. Good luck in sanitation!


  3. Carlie says

    Oh, Mo Willems is a great children’s writer; he also works on Sesame Street. Definitely for the preschool set, but goofy fun. Our Mo Willems books are entirely ragged from overuse.

  4. Barn Owl says

    Meh. I prefer the original “Ask Dr. Science” (He knows more than you do!), from the Fortress of Arrogance.

    I have a Masters Degree…in Science!

  5. says

    No sir, I don’t like it.

    And you know why? Because anyone who intentionally invokes the names of Bills both Hicks and Nye really ought to be a lot funnier, as well as more snarky and less outright abusive.

  6. jackd says

    He missed a great answer to the first question in this set regarding why a neutered male dog would hump your leg: It is doggie’s way of saying, “I PWN JOOOO!!!1!”

    Explaining dominance behavior by means of the equivalence between leg-humping dogs and gamers. Best comment I ever saw on Slashdot.