I woke up this morning to learn that Donald Trump has totally destroyed the credibility of all of those WOMEN who have been accusing him of sexual harassment and assault. He has proof that WOMEN have been lying.
And that proof is a MAN.
Case closed. Donald Trump has a witness who as an 18 year old British BOY was flying first class on a domestic American flight, and HE had his eyes locked on the WOMAN who claims Trump was pawing at her, and HE swears it was actually the WOMAN who was pawing HIM.
HE has no evidence that HE was even there, but you should believe HIM because HE said so, and HE also said HE has a photographic memory, and also was clearly witnessing the scene through eyes made of cells containing Y chromosomes, and perceiving it with a MALE brain.
The person who was being pawed and might be expected to retain a more vivid recollection than a random passenger on the flight was, well, a WOMAN, and bitchez be lyin’, am I right, fellas?
Of course, Anthony Gilberthorpe also claims to have procured rent-boys for the Thatcher cabinet, that he was engaged to a beautiful American woman who doesn’t exist (is this like the Canadian girlfriend trope, only for the British it’s their American fiance?), and he fed a story that he had AIDS to the newspapers so he could sue them for defamation. HE is not exactly a source with a great reputation for probity, but HE says what the Trump Campaign wants to hear, and HE is a MAN, which adds +10 to all reliability rolls.
That Trump accepts this MAN as a credible source, by the way, adds another oily, repulsive sheen to his trusted television surrogates, Corey Lewandowski, Kayleigh McEnany, Jeffrey Lord, and Scottie Nell Hughes. That isn’t the reek of cadaverine and hydrogen sulfide coming from those people, it is the scent of sanctity and the aroma of veracity, soon to be bottled and sold under the Trump™ brand as the perfume, Honestly.
Gosh, I’m convinced! I guess I’m voting for tRump now!
Hey, I’ve had Canadian girlfriends, so obviously the man …
Oh wait, I live in Canada.
I’ve heard many Trump surrogates claim that this couldn’t have possibly happened because: First Class. People. Eyes. Many Witnesses.
Here’s my take. This happened in 1981. Airline deregulation wasn’t complete until 1984. I flew often in those years and I can attest to the fact that, unlike today’s cattle cars, many flights were only partially full. Some were nearly empty. On cross country flights from JFK or Philly to SF or LA there were times when I had a row of seats all to myself. I clearly recall one transatlantic flight on BA where the stewards and stewardesses outnumbered the passengers. I’d ring for service and, presto, someone was there within 30 seconds.
My point being that in 1981 it was quite possible that on a domestic flight 1st class was only partially full. Perhaps only Trump and the woman shared their row.
That’s the problem with a long memory. You have a frame reference that younger people may not have.
Gilberthope appears to be a pathological fabulist (or attention-seeker), as well as a profit-seeking serial tabloid source.
His schemes have always seemed rather poorly conceived and executed, often -and somewhat foreseeably – to his detriment.
You forget some important factors in the math: She’s a WOMAN so –1000 points + DT says she’s UGLY so no way would he try to do anything. After all, he only assaults beautiful women.
I know it’s been one of Trump’s favorite strategies throughout the election, but I really wasn’t expecting him to pull an “I’m rubber, you’re glue” on this one.
And another plus for DT in the math…HE is #TheVictim:
In 1981 I was once on a cross-country night flight that was practically empty. I left my window seat to go stretch out in one of the many empty rows down the middle of the plane. I put all the armrests up, got one seatbelt around me, and slept. Nobody in their seat could see me there. It was that empty of other people.
On the other hand, on another night, I did some consensual groping while seated in a Greyhound bus that was completely full of people. There was some graffiti in the bathroom claiming that some couple had gone further.
Bernard Bumner @ # 4 – IOW (or should I say OMG?), a British James O’Keefe?
Sounds perfect for a Trump character witness!
Pierce R. Butler @9
Sort of, although there is prurient edge to Gilberthorpe’s tabloid stories, not least of all in the covert production and sale of an actual sex tape of his one-time champion and supposed friend, MP Piers Merchant.
That single example is probably the only case of a verifiable story being sold by the man, otherwise his tales are rather fantastic, even if – as with the timing of his revelations of underage male prostitutes in politician’s sex parties – they are topical subjects.
From this to planting supposedly libelous stories of his own homosexual promiscuity (at the time, considered scandalous), to procurring underage prostitutes for elite sex parties, to sheltering prostitutes from an IRA bomb, to a predatory woman trying to seduce poor Trump, there is a common thread. It may be simply that sex sells, but there is something in the telling and his personality which suggests a rather unhealthy attitude to sex.
Just to let all you Americans here know, I’m British, I have a Y-chromosome, and I have been on an aeroplane when I was a teenager. Twice in fact. With such superlative credentials I find it hard to imagine that there’s anyone who won’t trust implicitly everything I say.
So if there are any tricky public matters that any of you need a cast-iron alibi for, I’m available at very good rates. I’ll even pretend to be the Archbishop of Canterbury if you like.
Bernard Bumner @ # 10: … there is something in the telling and his personality which suggests a rather unhealthy attitude to sex.
Yup, the (other) Trump Chumps will love ‘im!
I flew tons of flights in first class in the 80s — as a man of very tall stature, my company afforded me that luxury despite my youth. I saw plenty of groping in first class, hopefully all of it consensual. I was shy so I would immediately look away if I noticed anything that I might not be welcome seeing.
You neglected the epistemological tangle he’s got his short-‘n’-orange-curlies in. He said it never happened, he’s never met the woman. Now he produces a bloke who says it happened, they met, but it was the woman who was all hot and bothered for Orange Julius. O what a tangled web we weave, eh?
PDX_Greg@13, I also flew a considerable amount during the period in question — both USAlien domestic and transatlantic, in all classes, including upstairs in the 747 bubble — and NEVER noticed any improper / sexual activities. The worse I now recall actually happened to me — a USAF officer, seated next to me, babbling on incessantly about xianity and trying to me, the complete fecker simply would not shut up! I eventually retreated to the flight attendants’s area. (I assume he then started harassing other people.)
In addition, even in first class, it’s rather hard to see what other people are doing in their seats, with the exceptions of those seated nearby (generally in the same-ish row). I am intrigued how so much was seen…?
anbheal — It’s not just tell a lie often, it’s tell a lot of lies. All the better if they contradict each other because it’ll just confuse the rubes even more.
anbheal — Do you have a link to an article quoting him saying he didn’t know her?
This kind of thing isn’t just something that used to happen in the 80s. It still happens today, and airlines don’t seem to do a great job of dealing with it even when it’s reported:
http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2016/08/what_happens_when_sexual_assault_happens_on_a_long_haul_flight.html
@Silver Fox #3, back then, one couldn’t upgrade one’s seat. Buy coach, stay in coach. That tended to stratify one’s flying experience.
As for deregulation, don’t get me started on the flying experience today. It far too much reminds me of flying on a C-130! Just minus gear and parachute…
@screechymonkey #18, why do you think that the crime stats are down? Don’t track it, report crime rates are lower, while many crime rates remain unchanged, declare victory.
Seriously, vandalism is tracked, bank robbery is tracked, murder is tracked, rape isn’t tracked. Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot, Over?!
Oh wait, property crimes, big business injury and dead men count, wimmin’ don’t count. :(
@#14, anbeheal: Orange Julius? More like a Yellow Caligula. Or Nero.
I’m not a man but I play one on TV. Can I be the truth? Because I’m pretty sure I saw Donald Trump molesting an airplane.
Like, the actual airplane. Not someone on it. Although I’m sure he did that too.
@robro:
Among other places, here:
It seems fitting that a pathological liar and a self-confessed panderer should speak up for Trump. I imagine he will be welcomed with open arms.
*raises hand*
That article really makes Gilberthorpe (aka “serial fableist”) out as a quite likely a paid shill to distract everyone from Drumph, proving Gilberthorpe a liar. Maybe check for a sudden deposit in his vacant bank account (if he even has one. I’ll bet Cayman Island is where the payment for service rendered ended up, where they have government sanction to remain undisclosable).
With such a name and life”style” it is tempting to play around with munching his name into a form of parody, to mock him.
Also astounding that Drumph would present such an obvious plant as PROOF of innocence. And only of a single account while there is an increasingly long line of accusations.
Drumph really does live in a delusional alternate reality than most people. Not just an arm chair diagnosis (rhetorical only, tsk tsk) His entire campaign behaviors, I hold as evidence, with not a single piece is in his favor.
EG calling for drug testing before the next debate. Projecting evidence of his recent performances in the last two debates onto Clinton to attack her calm response to his bluster and continual sniffing. Her final resolution to relax, near the end of the debate, he tries to paint as drugs wearing off. As distraction from his ominous, quasi-“looming” performance during the 2nd debate. I suspect he has a hidden stash of clean urine (from Melania) to secretly substitute during the pre-Debate drug test, or maybe a bribed insider, who’d falsify the results by swapping names between Hill’s sample and Drumph’s. *twirling mustache* (maybe I can get paid for my nefarious ‘cunning plans’ {TM Baldrick} )
Everything he accuses others of, he himself is prominently the most guilty of.
™Baldrick
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excuse me for experimenting by wasting bandwidth, tsk tsk
aitch-tee-emm-elling:
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excuse me for experimenting by wasting bandwidth, tsk tsk
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excuse me for experimenting by wasting bandwidth, tsk tsk
The absurd conspiracies and sketchy people to whom Trump assigns validity, especially when used as an alibi, are evidence enough that he’s eternally ill suited for the presidency. If Trump is basing his innocence on the word of this “eye witness” to the event on the airplane, then he must also be making the claim that the woman was molesting him. Trump has claimed to possess a “good brain” & perfect memory a number of times. So why doesn’t he remember this aggressive woman? Why didn’t he press charges?
I give all these accusers a lot of credit. I’m not sure I could keep my my recent meal down if I had to relive an encounter with the King of Skeevy via an interview.
The absurd conspiracies and sketchy people to whom Trump assigns validity, especially when used as an alibi, are evidence enough that he’s eternally ill suited for the presidency. If Trump is basing his innocence on the word of this “eye witness” to the event on the airplane, then he must also be making the claim that the woman was molesting him. Trump has claimed to possess a “good brain” & perfect memory a number of times. So why doesn’t he remember this aggressive woman? Why didn’t he press charges?
I give all these accusers a lot of credit. I’m not sure I could keep my most recent meal down if I had to relive an encounter with the King of Skeevy via an interview.
cartomancer @ 11
Turbulent priest indeed!