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James Arjuna, International Spa Design Engineer!

When we bought our house, it came with a disconnected, nonfunctional hot tub. It’s still here, sitting unused in our back yard, because having a mere Ph.D. in biology means that I don’t know how to fix it, and also, I don’t get paid enough to afford to have it fixed by a competent hot tub expert. And thus am I made to realize that I am a failure. I shouldn’t have wasted effort on that lowly science degree; instead, I should have learned how to install hot tubs.

Because hot tub experts are wizards, masters of all knowledge and the mysteries of space and time.

I have been reading the works of James Arjuna, International Spa Design Engineer, who is a real scientist. He said so.

I am a real scientist for over 47 years. I make my living producing functional equipment that always works as designed because I don’t use any pseudo science. I hate pseudo science religious crap in academia.

He says so frequently.

Please check out my science blog. It is based on over 47 years of using the scientific method to solve problems and to seek to find what is really true.

Here is where I do most of my recent research. I have read over 41,000 papers on biology, DNA, Evolution, genetics.

I don’t know which science blog to check out, though, since he didn’t provide a link. He has several!

  • Hot Tubs And Spas Blog
  • Education Literacy and Science
  • Science, Religion, Politics What’s More Important?
  • Evolution Science Clarity

41,000 papers is a lot. In 47 years, that’s 2 or 3 papers a day, which is about what I read. It’s hard work reading a science paper with comprehension, so his dedication to biology may be why his hot tub business has some bitter complaints, and why his brother thinks he’s a sleazy con artist. Mastery of all knowledge and the mysteries of space and time makes demands on one’s life; sacrifices must be made. This is another mark of my failure; I’m not guilty of bad business practices, and I haven’t alienated either of my brothers yet. I don’t think; maybe I’ll have to ask when I see them next month.

So I looked up Arjuna’s latest science article to learn wisdom and discover the deep secrets of the Hot Tub Masters. In this, he asserts that there is not and never has been a beneficial mutation. His chosen example? The lactose tolerance mutation, because while it may be beneficial, it couldn’t possibly have happened.

The most ridiculous of this is the lactose tolerance mutation. First of all making lactase is made in a gene that is 49,335 base pairs for just one of the THREE lactase genes. This is the most common gene found in lactose intolerance.

First rule of the Hot Tub Masters: Find a big number. Numbers are sciencey, and big ones are hard, and 49,335 sounds scary. How could it be? 49,355 whatevers must be impossible!

According to the article claiming that this was some great event creating this new gene. It turns out that it is only 2 base pares were changed to cause this gene to function. Where did the other totally designed 49332 BP come from that were aligned perfectly and just needed two base pares to change?

Second rule of the Hot Tub Masters: Find a small number. We must trivialize any accomplishment. Only 2 out of that intimidating 49,355? That can’t possibly matter. The scientists will splutter, “but single nucleotide changes can distort the whole shape of a molecule, or disrupt a biochemically active site; and in this case, the modification is to a cis regulatory element which modifies expression, not the sequence of the enzyme”, but you can ignore them, because of the obvious fact that 2 is a lot less than 49,355.

Third rule of the Hot Tub Masters: You are not bounded by any rules. Even though you’re making a strangely irrelevant argument from arithmetic, you can say that 49355 - 2 = 49332, and no one will care. Also, spelling is an oppressive tool of those pinheads in academia.

Fourth rule of the Hot Tub Masters: You can read 41,000 papers on biology, DNA, Evolution, genetics and still not understand basic biology, and that’s OK. The thousands of bases in a gene must be aligned perfectly in your head, whatever that means, and never mind that that is not a rule in reality.

Hot Tub Masters are free spirits. Truth is whatever they say it is.

It was a pre-existing gene from ancient ancestors prior to this finding and they found a group where it was turned off and then a group where they drank milk where it was functioning. The two base pairs were not mutated from disease in the functioning gene and in the malfunctioning gene it was and is a disease.

Fifth rule of the Hot Tub Masters: Consistency be damned. You can simultaneously announce that there is no such thing as a beneficial mutation, and that groups without the mutation are diseased (surprise, lactose intolerant individuals! You are afflicted with a disease!) and that groups that have the mutation are not diseased. And that it wasn’t a mutation anyway.

In the 2.5 million DNA studies there are no cases of any living or recently extinct (6000 yrs on human studies) showing even one verifiable beneficial mutation.

Not one of the PhD’s have been able to produce one. Therefore, there is no such thing as a beneficial mutation. It is fantasy.

But…but James! You’ve only read 41,000 of the 2.5 million studies!

And I am so confused. The Hot Tub Master plainly said that the 2 nucleotide variation was the difference between diseased and not diseased. Even in his own head it’s clearly beneficial to carry that trait.

We know that Evolutionists believe that “duplication” mutations are the “power behind evolution”. But even a base pair duplication causes disease or deformity because it destroys the original proteins construction with extra proteins that cannot be integrated.

Well, a single base pair duplication would be a frame shift mutation, so it certainly would mess up the structure of the protein. But we’re talking about segmental duplications, where a complete copy of the original gene is left intact and a duplicate is made elsewhere.

I don’t even understand what he’s talking about when he says a single base duplication creates extra proteins that cannot be integrated. That makes no sense. It’s almost as if he has no understanding of molecular biology and genetics at all.

But that cannot be! He’s an International Man of Mystery Spa Design Engineer!

They cannot be integrated because the HOX genes have to place them into the correct use and the HOX genes are master programmed for a specific master plan of the organism.

Then they cannot be recognized by the immune system and so the immune system takes the only messed up proteins and attacks them. Every mutation destroys the recognition of both the HOX to use them and the immune system to destroy them as foreign attack cells, that our immune system does not recognize.

I…what? I know a little bit about HOX genes; they don’t control every little thing, every gene in every cell. They set up domains with specific body plan identities in early development. Most genes don’t interact with HOX genes at all, so it’s a little peculiar to claim they limit everything — I’m beginning to think the Hot Tub Master memorized a few buzz words and phrases and is plastering them all over his cartoonish and wrong vision of how gene regulation works.

As for his immune system argument — does he know nothing about how adaptive immunity works? How self/non-self recognition is a product of selection?

James Arjuna is bringing discredit to the noble traditions of the Hot Tub Masters. I suspect that he is not a True Hot Tub Master™, and I’m going to have to look farther for a master of all knowledge and the mysteries of space and time. I also think my broken hot tub is going to continue to languish in my back yard, because if his knowledge of hot tubs is as sound as his knowledge of biology, I wouldn’t want him to come near it.

I know I sure can’t do anything about it. I know nothing about hot tubs. Nothing at all.

Comments

  1. Dave, ex-Kwisatz Haderach says

    Oh no PZ! What have you done? You don’t mess with the Hot Tub Masters! They have time machines, I saw it in a late night documentary recently. At least I think it was a documentary, but I was drinking pretty heavily.

  2. Doubting Thomas says

    Bet I could fix your hot tub. Too bad I don’t live anywhere near you. Yeah, I know next to nothing about DNA and genetics.

  3. says

    One thing everyone should be made aware of is that “Hot Tub Time Machine” was a much better movie than you might think judging by the title.

    Just seemed apropos.

  4. blf says

    I know nothing about hot tubs. Nothing at all.

    They make good landing spots for trebuchet-launched kittens.

  5. Jonathan Houser says

    As somebody working on an Engineering degree, I always feel embarrassed when some engineer comes out saying stupid crap and using his engineering degree to claim that he’s a “real scientist” or should be given respect in some way. I see this a lot, but not all engineers are that dumb or full of themselves I assure you.

    I think the problem is if you get a degree in most sciences, say chemistry for instance, but you do the minimal amount of work, you don’t really care about the topic, and you learn nothing, then after you graduate you go work at a bank and leave science forever and nobody cares that you do mortgage adjustments. If you do that with an engineering degree, after you graduate somebody still hands you a sack of money to go design a widget on a hot tub thus validating your belief that you are smart person that knows about science. You can be a complete idiot and get a degree in math, science, or engineering (it’s a myth that these fields are only for smart people,) but it is much harder to get a science related job as a dumb geology major than a dumb engineering major.

    Thus you get lots of dumb people saying “listen to me talk about science, I am an engineer!” I apologize on behalf of engineers that realize that they don’t automatically know about every scientific topic just because they passed a bunch of calculus classes.

  6. Christopher says

    engineer != scientist

    technician != engineer

    This dude is a technician. He doesn’t engineer spas, he installs and repairs them (badly according to reviews).

  7. Callinectes says

    Well here’s your problem. Your hot tub has got bits of science stuck all up in it. That’ll cost extra.

  8. OverlappingMagisteria says

    PZ, I see that you are becoming a Hot Tub Master yourself! You successfully applied the Third Rule of Hot Tub Masters by changing 49,335 into 49,355

    Numbers are sciencey, and big ones are hard, and 49,335 sounds scary. How could it be? 49,355 whatevers must be impossible!

    Good work! Soon you will understand the universe! Plus you’ll have a working hot tub in your backyard.

  9. says

    On hot Tubs you should see the work of Émile Zolar-Panel.
    An immigrant from France, he originally settled in Rochester, NY in the middle of the twelfth century as an alternative energy consultant.
    In his book Jacuzi he exposed a dreadful scandal in the hot tub industry, which had been a hot item up till then.
    The Rochesterians were the first civilized people to bathe since Roman times (which is a long time to go without a bath), and an unfortunate side effect of Jacuzi was the decline of this habit.
    Much later, in his book Germinal, Émile commented strongly on the value of hygiene.

  10. Christopher says

    hahahaha

    http://www.wave3.com/story/1993038/cdc-hot-tubs-can-harbor-harmful-bacteria

    CDC Director Dr. Julie Gerberding says “there is some risk of an infectious disease being acquired from the water. There’s some bacteria that can evolve if the chlorine isn’t correct. And there are some other organisms that can contaminate the pool, especially if kids have been in the pool with diarrhea or other people who have illness. That’s why one of our most important tips is to stay out of the water if you have diarrhea and keep your kids out of the water if they’re sick.”

    Being able to handle a chlorinated environment seems like a pretty beneficial mutation for a bacteria.

  11. zenlike says

    Since everything that needed to be said about delusional idiot James Arjuna has already been said in the original post, I’m just going to second anthrosciguy. I avoided “Hot Tub Time Machine” for some years because I judged the book by its cover. O, how wrong I was.

  12. Doug Little says

    My god his writing is hard to follow. Maybe he should have worked on his comprehension and grammar first.

  13. bcwebb says

    So just think of your hot tub as a fish incubator. Now you’ve reduced the problem to one you’ve already solved. ‘Course having said that you’re probably calculating how many fish you could raise in it.

    It’s weird how scientists will undertake the construction of all sorts of bizarre and complex structures for their work but be intimidated by something as simple as a tank with pumps and filters for home use.

    I suspect you and your wife don’t really want a hot tub…

    I expect your wife doesn’t buy the vacuum cleaner is too complex line either.

  14. frog says

    Why do I suspect that elsewhere he or a crony draws a racist link between “diseased” people who are lactose intolerant and the fact that lactose tolerance is mainly found in northern Europeans?

  15. raven says

    weird guy:

    First of all making lactase is made in a gene that is 49,335 base pairs for just one of the THREE lactase genes.

    What?

    wikipedia:

    Lactase is encoded by a single genetic locus on chromosome 2.[12

    Guy doesn’t even know what a gene is. Or what Wikipedia is.

    Humans have only one lactase gene, not three.

    Instead of pretending to read 41,000 science papers, he should repeat grade school science.

  16. notruescott says

    Every good scientist knows that hot tubs can’t actually get hot, because thermodynamics. Hot tubs can only lose heat.

  17. marko says

    They make good landing spots for trebuchet-launched kittens.

    Your trébuchet skills must be without equal.

  18. says

    You can simultaneously announce that there is no such thing as a beneficial mutation, and that groups without the mutation are diseased (surprise, lactose intolerant individuals! You are afflicted with a disease!) and that groups that have the mutation are not diseased.

    I think what he’s trying to say is that the functional lactase gene was the ancestral version, and that there was a detrimental mutation that created the non-functional lactase gene. Of course, he gives no supporting argument for this, other than his assertion that beneficial mutations don’t exist, which was what he was trying to argue for in the first place. Circular logic FTW!

  19. Sarahface, who is trying to break the lurking habit says

    5, Jonathan Houser

    As somebody working on an Engineering degree, I always feel embarrassed when some engineer comes out saying stupid crap and using his engineering degree to claim that he’s a “real scientist” or should be given respect in some way.
    [...]
    Thus you get lots of dumb people saying “listen to me talk about science, I am an engineer!” I apologize on behalf of engineers that realize that they don’t automatically know about every scientific topic just because they passed a bunch of calculus classes.

    As another engineering student, seconded. Engineers do science, of a sort, but just because one can figure out how complicated set of components work doesn’t mean one is qualified to talk on anything and everything, especially things way outside the subject, like biology, geology, cosmology…

    And Christopher @6, agreed, though with the caveat that *normally* I don’t mind technicians calling themselves engineers.

    Interestingly, if you go to his profile, he has 4 blogs: 3 about science/religion/politics-type issues and 1 about hot tubs. And on at least 1 of the 3 religious screed-blogs, he links to his other blogs without mentioning that it’s his writing. Possibly to give the vague impression of having more support?
    Also, a gem:

    True science is a way to find the Truth. Believing in fairy tales of magical processes and mystical causes is nonsense. It is the foundation of the religion of Evodelusionism.

    Being accredited by a university supported by evil is not something to be proud of. It is something to avoid, if you really want freedom, contentment, joy for life, satisfaction and peace, knowing that you did not harm others.

    As soon as someone tells me they have a degree in one of the fake sciences like paleontology, biology, and genetics, I question their sanity and ask them questions to see if they got through that mess of delusional crap, and not believed the fantasy nonsense. Most don’t make it.

    from education-literacy.blogspot.co.uk, one of his many pet projects.
    Apparently all of biology is bollocks! And in other posts he says that STDs are the main (only?) cause of our problems, because they give babies birth defects and cause cancer and whatever else and big pharma is terrible and there’s a conspiracy to keep us unhealthy and my god there’s so much bullshit there.

  20. says

    James Arjuna, International Spa Design Engineer!

    My first thought was Bergholt Stuttley Johnson, aka Bloody Stupid Johnson.

  21. CorvusCorax says

    PZ, your hot tub obviously must have suffered a 2 base pair mutation (out of 43,935) that cause a loss of function. I would suggest purchasing a second, functional hot tub, and see what happens to the first…

    …time machine.

  22. EvoMonkey says

    Sixth Rule of the Hot Tub Masters: Compile your quotes of wisdom on wikipedia user page. If some quotes are incredibly wise, include them twice.

    My quotes:

    “The obvious isn’t obvious until it is obvious”.

    “Putting your faith in humanity has historically not been a good concept. Why do you think it is “different” now?”

    “Find the truth for yourself and don’t succumb to indoctrination.”

    “The obvious is not obvious until it is obvious”.

  23. says

    International Spa Design Engineer, who is a real scientist.

    and

    I am a real scientist for over 47 years. I make my living producing functional equipment that always works as designed because I don’t use any pseudo science.

    Ahh yes, this again. As an Engineer myself </ducks>, it’s painful to see so many of my colleagues (not really, Engineering is an extremely large category) who fall into Dunning-Kruger and the like. Engineering usually requires using science and scientific principles, but not doing science. How much research and discovery of new scientific ideas come with designing Hot Tubs.

    It’s interesting to me – As an undergrad, I was a Biology Major. Probably would have pursued a career in the field if wasn’t for financial reasons. But, these days I am a “Unified Communications and Collaborations” Engineer (UCnC is the new buzz word. It’s really just large enterprise level communication engineering). Anyway, my experience as both a student of the Sciences and working as an Engineer, the differences in daily tasks are pretty obvious.

    Not to say only those with degrees working in labs can do science, but it sounds like this guy isn’t doing it

  24. David Chapman says

    Inevitably, as a result of this thread theme my computer is now working its nuts off trying to sell me jacuzzis. The internet is a strange beast in many ways.

  25. says

    @PZ

    As it happens, you just happen to have a tardigrade what are a real ingineer lurking on your blog. It’s suggestion is that you drill a hole near the top and a hole near the bottom of your hot tub, and then attach a simple heat exchanger made of copper piping. The linkied image should clarify what I mean. (It is so rediculously simple, that it is a little hard to describe.

    Linky.

    Light some coals in the middle of the copper spiral and you should have nice walm water soon enough.

  26. unclefrogy says

    I was curious about the name so I went to the links and it appears that the name he is using is not the name he was born with. There is nothing wrong per say with changing your name people do it all the time but his choice is interesting. Arjuna is the hero of the Mahabharata and friend of Krishna.
    Grandiose? for a spa sales con-man
    uncle frogy

  27. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    I make my living producing functional equipment that always works as designed

    BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *breathe* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *breathe* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *breathe* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *breathe* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    -an actual engineer.

  28. Big Boppa says

    Mr. Arjuna makes some compelling arguments but I think I’ll wait to see the peer reviews from the Cable guy and my barber, Nunzio.

    Also, too, as well. If you can’t get your hot tub fixed you can always convert it to a backyard water feature/zebra fish hatchery.

  29. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    I don’t even understand what he’s talking about when he says a single base duplication creates “extra proteins that cannot be integrated”. That makes no sense.

    The extra proteins increase without bound? O.o That doesn’t sound healthy.

  30. blf says

    I make my living producing functional equipment that always works as designed

    That’s entirely possible…… for some hithertofore not-known definitions of “producing”, “functional”, “always”, “works”, and “designed”.

    Perhaps the same ones as used in fundigrad to “prove” evilution is false and therefore, hey presto magic, cretinism “must” be Teh Trvth.

      — Another engineer, educated as a scientist.

  31. blf says

    I love that I’m now getting banner ads for hot tubs.

    But are they built and installed by a creationista who makes his living producing functional equipment that always works as designed ?

    Or do they use that boring old sciencey stuff. (In which case they probably smell of chloroform. Not sure how to check before purchase & installation, however…)

  32. cardinalsmurf says

    Did some digging (hey, I’m supposed to be working right now, so I didn’t dig terribly deep) on this guy. Having trouble figuring out where lies end and truth begins, but the flurry of drama surrounding this guy is entertaining at least.

    James Arjuna == James Campbell Gruver. Previously part owner with brother John Gruver in The Spa Specialist in Colorado.

    This link goes to Complaints Board wherin Jim and brother John have yet another exchange (this is one of many I have found) about legal issues with the company. Jim’s delusional behavior is fascinating to behold.

    http://www.complaintsboard.com/complaints/the-spa-specialist-inc-broomfield-unic-adams-county-colorado-c179194.html

    What’s frightening is the seeming regularity of Jim posting on the same threads his brother does and calling his brother delusional. Family can be scary. I’m glad I don’t know what John is going through.

  33. cardinalsmurf says

    Here is another thread which is odd in its own way. I suppose John is just trying to maintain his anonymity here.

    http://www.poolspaforum.com/forum/?showtopic=26436

    Bonus points for anyone who can find this alleged “music” they refer to. We need to hear it!

    How deep does this rabbit hole go? I should stop now, shouldn’t I?

  34. cardinalsmurf says

    Music found:

    http://www.havenmade.com/

    Good havens!

    “Human Emotional Mental Garbage” says it all.

    Other interesting titles:
    “Johnny Took The Wrong Road Home”
    “Baby Please Don’t Go Live Holland”
    “Cheaters Always Losers”
    “Get Your Fantasy Straight”
    “Praying For My Brother”
    “Why Do You Torment Me?”
    “I Aint Gonna Put UP With A**holes No More!”
    “Paranoid Delusionists”

    I am exhausted. This train wreck exceeded my expectations.

  35. Lofty says

    I suppose PVC pipe glue smells sciency like chloroform or something. Can “North Star” papers be used as hot tub insulation?
    Just swirling around ideas.

  36. imthegenieicandoanything says

    What a world!

    I’m selling tickets to it, if anyone is interested. Fellow atheists get a hefty discount!

  37. says

    Hah, this is funny, I knew you were talking about my “good friend” GoodScienceForYou. That’s his name on youtube. He’s been harrassing me for years since I once pretended to be interested in what he had to say. Check his videos, they are even worse then his blog. He told me he read 200,000 papers….he didn’t. He calls evolution “evodelusion”.

  38. says

    @ David Marjanović

    How the vertical gene transfer did you find this!?!

    Knowing what to look for. Simply google keywords like: “hot tub copper coil heat exchanger …” and it immediately pops up.

    The principle is very common in mechanical engineering, and has been used extensively at least since Roman times.

  39. Paul Zimmerle says

    I am DEEPLY disappointed by the lack of Hot Tub Time Machine references in this post!

  40. marksheffield says

    James Arjuna aka James “Jim” Gruver is quite probably mentally ill. His mother, brother and his son have all been diagnosed with bipolar affective disorder. I had a chance to email with his brother three years ago, and the whole family steer clear of him because he constantly lashes out at others, and may pose a threat to himself or others.

    Jim shows the classical idealization (my band tours Europe, I have read 47 trillion papers) and devaluation (you are all idiots, human emotional mental garbage) of borderline personality disorder.

    The saddest part of Jim’s tale, according to his brother Jon, is the fraud he committed in taking money from his mother and brother to start his spa business, which is currently under collections agreements in three different districts.

    In short, this is a man haunted by real demons who has destroyed everything that mattered in his life. Online, he is a thing to be pitied… and ignored.

  41. jnorris says

    Dr Myers, I suggest you get a grant to raise zebra fish for your lab in your backyard. You hire an aquatic wildlife habitat expert (hot tub contractor) to convert your hot tub into a “zebra fish mating, birthing, & nursery paradise”. Problem solved.