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May 18 2012

Jesus Christ On A Popsicle Stick! (No, Really!)

There is nothing so distressing
As an “inadvertent blessing”
Which can leave an artist messing
With the sacramental wine
But Sebastian Errazuriz
Made a Christcicle, which sure is
Bound to piss off any purist
Who considers Christ “divine”

Is it art, or bad behavior,
Making light of our dear Savior
Though his crucifixion gave your
Life its meaning, don’t you know?—
Jesus loves you—this he shows in
How his sacrifice was chosen,
Now a popsicle, that’s frozen,
As a treat, at ten below.

Christ on a popsicle stick!

(CNN)–Sebastian Errazuriz has used art to take on an array of issues: New York’s death rate, the Occupy movement, military suicide, children with disabilities, the brutal reign of Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet. Now, the Brooklyn-based artist is taking aim at what he sees as religious extremism.

At a party this weekend celebrating New York Design Week, which begins today, the Chilean-born artist plans to hand out 100 “Christian Popsicles” made of “frozen holy wine transformed into the blood of Christ” and featuring a crucifix instead the tongue depressor that typically hosts the frozen treats, he said.

Ok, this is actually a pretty cool story. The wine itself was blessed inadvertently… which means that the pretend magic words were uttered in a different context than they were supposed to be. But the pretend magic words were, apparently, uttered. So these are some kick-ass popsicles, made with the literal blood of Christ. Well, literal if you believe… never mind.

12 comments

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  1. 1
    Trebuchet

    You want crackers with that?

  2. 2
    crowepps

    “As for the frozen wine, Errazuriz said, he concealed it in a cooler and took it into a church, where it was “inadvertently blessed by the priest while turning wine into the blood of Christ during the Eucharist.”

    Oh, wow — so in addition to suspicious fanatics running to the priest to tattle on neighbors they claim received crackers and haven’t been seen to swallow obviously enough, now they will be watching arrivals, trying to check out bags and purses for wine? This approaches farce.

  3. 3
    Samantha Vimes

    This is far from the most obviously blasphemous thing I’ve seen. In fact, I can imagine people wanting these as something sacred but fun.

  4. 4
    Noadi

    And the added benefit of being alcoholic popsicles which should add to the fun. I wonder how it got them to freeze properly? I’ve had trouble trying to freeze leftover wine in icecube trays to keep it fresh for cooking with later.

  5. 5
    thebookofdave

    Christsicles are a terrific idea! Next stop: Islam, featuring Sunday brunch with Muhammed (peace-be-upon-him-although-a-tomb-is-pretty-peaceful-to-begin-with) shaped pork breakfast patties.

  6. 6
    Fred

    THERE IS ONLY ONE LIFE-SAVER:

    http://www.foodiggity.com/behold-the-hoffsicle-the-david-hasselhoff-popsicle/

  7. 7
    Rebecca Rose

    Love the family values, too. “Here, little Timmy, have a popsicle…. of frozen wine.” (!!!) Maybe good Christians will market nice little juice-boxes of wine for their kids to take to school… Might help tone down those loud and unruly classrooms! Teachers will love it… Cheaper than Ritalin??

  8. 8
    rikitiki

    great verse…not to nitpick, but you’ve a typo:

    “Bound to piss of any purist” — should, I think, be “off” .vs “of”

  9. 9
    Cuttlefish

    Ack! Quite so rikitiki! Fixed, and thanks!

  10. 10
    Die Anyway

    Noadi said: “…leftover wine …”

    Two words that I have never had the opportunity to say.

    I’m thinking that Jesus-cicles would be a great summer camp craft project.

  11. 11
    articulett

    I tasted Jesus as a Catholic girl and was unimpressed–

  12. 12
    Pierce R. Butler

    Noadi @ # 4: I wonder how it got them to freeze properly?

    The last line of our esteemed host’s verse gives precise specifications (give or take Fahrenheit or Celsius).

    You may not want to cram one of those Jesus Pops, fresh from the cooler, between your lips and across your tongue…

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