Oct 16 2007

Version 2.7

The “cognitive daily” blog asks: Will humans marry robots in 50 years?


She’s my little bit of heaven, even better than real life,
She’s the version 2.7 motor-actuated wife.
When I come home from the office, she’s a sympathetic ear,
With the faintest scent of silicone I catch as we draw near.
“Here, let me take your papers, Hon, and let me rub your back;
You must have had a stressful day—come on, let’s hit the sack.”
Her lips are warm and supple, with a kiss that shows desire—
A brilliant application of a bit of memory wire.
She trembles gently at my touch, as strain-gauge sensors feel,
And as she starts to moan and gasp, you’d swear that she was real.
But she’s better than a flesh-and-blood—For one thing, she has codes
Allowing me to choose from seventeen vibration modes!
She never has a headache; there’s no in-laws to avoid;
Heck, I’ve never even had the need to change a solenoid!
She’s my little bit of heaven, even better than real life,
She’s the version 2.7 motor-actuated wife.



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  1. 1

    Dude, your poems rock, but I think your posts would be better if they linked directly to the article that inspired them, rather than making us cut and paste! This might help.

  2. 2

    Thanks for the tip!

  3. 3

    No problemo! Now I don’t have to press, like, two whole keys AND use my mouse.

  4. 4

    Wow, Sir Cuttlefish. Brilliantly comedic AND sexy. Did you intend the sexy part? Because it's sexy.Maybe I'm just horribly depraved. :3

  5. 5

    Best of all, robotic spouses don't produce children or ask you to. (Where do I sign up?)

  6. 6
    John Scanlon

    By chance I started reading this with the tune of TMBG's "Im a Paleontologist" and it fits very well, but wants a chorus."I'm a roboteroticist that's what I amthat's what I amthat's what I am…"

  1. 7
    Everything Old Is New Again (Or, Sex With Robots) » The Digital Cuttlefish

    […] Cognitive Daily asked “Will humans marry robots in 50 years”, which prompted this bit of musing from me. In 2009, the big news was HRP-4C (also mentioned in the Beeb’s current piece), which also got […]

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