This story broke while I was still in Europe, so you may have already heard of it: Republican state Sen. Marty Golden’s office was planning career-development classes for his “female constitutients,” where participants will “‘refresh’ their knowledge of what’s new in 21st century business etiquette and social protocol.” “POSTURE, DEPORTMENT, AND THE FEMININE PRESENCE: walking …
Category Archive: family
Jun 16 2012
Kids can sometimes be oblivious jerks
With Father’s Day tomorrow, I was reflecting upon some fond childhood memories with my dad when I realized…man, kids can be assholes sometimes, yet our parents still put up with us. I can think of two specific instances from when I was little. Obviously I wasn’t trying to be a jerk at age 6, but …
Oct 22 2011
I have eaten the best beef brisket in the world
Guess who won first place in beef brisket at the most prestigious barbecue competition in the world? That’s right, my brothers’ team, Brew-B-Q! A huge congratulations to my brother Pat, brother-in-law Danny, and brother Chris (who apparently traveled to Tennessee to be their third team member for the competition). Chris, Pat, & Danny I think …
Oct 21 2011
Good luck, bros!
My brother Pat and brother-in-law Danny’s barbecue team, Brew-B-Q, is competing in the 23rd annual Jack Daniel’s World Championship Invitational Barbecue this weekend. I wish them the best of luck, though I know from experience that their stuff is delicious. I think this is the first time I ever wished I was in Tennessee. And …
Sep 12 2011
Well, this was an odd day
Today was the last day of my parent’s visit to Seattle. We were walking down to grab some Piroshky Piroshky for lunch, when a young man came up to me. Guy: Excuse me, but… were you the one who did Boobquake? Me: …Yes. He sheepishly waved hi and then ran away. And then tweeted at …
Sep 09 2011
Welcome to Seattle, Mom & Dad
Within hours of my parents arriving in Seattle, my parents witnessed a pimp making a deal with a john by shouting a phone number and instructions out of his car while stuck in traffic on Broadway on Capitol Hill. Me: …I swear that’s the first time I’ve seen that happen. What else will they see …
Apr 22 2011
I love my Dad
Here’s his reaction to finding out the city council where he and my mom live are praying to Jesus: It has come to my attention that the Constitution is being threatened in Lady Lake, Florida. For you who have never heard of Lady Lake, it is part of a retirement development known as The Villages. …
Apr 20 2011
Hey Dad…
Did you know your city council is unconstitutionally supporting Jebus and wasting taxpayer’s time with prayer? I know how much you like writing letters to the editor – now may be a good time. At the very least, Bill Calhoun may be a godless golfing buddy for you. Well, that’s assuming everyone in Lady Lake, …
Dec 21 2010
Atheist golfing
Me: *hits drive on 18th hole, pushes it a little to the right* Uh oh, I’m almost in someone’s yard.Dad: You’ll like the sign in their yard.Me: *drives up*Sign: Jesus is the Reason for the SeasonMe: Ha! Darn, I missed. After my approach shot, I proceeded to shank my chip, and then because I was …




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