I try to get out to walk a few miles twice a day, which is normally fine and pleasant, but conditions have changed. Right now…
It is warm
We’ve had almost daily rainstorms for the past several weeks
This is Minnesota.
Do you know what this means, boys and girls?
The air is equal parts humidity and mosquitos. I walk down the sidewalk doing a slappy dance, fighting off clouds of carnivorous chitin, screaming out stuff like “Aaargh, not in the eye, you filthy bugger!” and “Yikes, how did you get in there?” and assorted incoherent epithets, occasionally having to spit out bugs, which is the downside of opening your mouth to cuss ’em out. Avoid bushes. Do not step in the grass. Anything with vegetation is a hive of evil that will stir itself at any dissturbance.
I’ve finally arrived at the safety of my office, raked the mangled corpses out of my beard (I have that bit of protection going for me), and can relax a little bit. I imagine it’s a bit like living in the Carboniferous.
Now you know why Minnesotans don’t mind winter so much. It murders the vicious little bitey bastards.