Sometimes, what they cut out of the book to make the movie wasn’t so essential


I haven’t read the book since the 1970s, but mainly what I remember about Mario Puzo’s The Godfather was how badly written it was…I guess I happily forgot the details. But now Mallory Ortberg has to go and remind me.

Really, the movie might be a classic, but man, the book was terrible.

Comments

  1. The Mellow Monkey says

    This is also how Saving Private Ryan ends. “Earn this.”

    I don’t know if I’ve ever been so torn between laughing and weeping before.

  2. The Mellow Monkey says

    Someone in the comments rightfully turned attention to the The Fistula Foundation, treating a medical condition that is far more serious and far more painful than simply lacking the approval of a bunch of fictional men.

    It’s a good cause.

  3. Moggie says

    Did the publisher not have an editor for this? Not just to say “hey Mario, about this whole giant hoo-ha thing?”, but also to deal with lines like this:

    When they went up to their suite — they were living together now — Lucy found a surprise waiting: a gourmet supper and next to her champagne glass, a jeweler’s box with a huge diamond engagement ring inside it.

    That reads more like part of a Grandpa Simpson anecdote than the source material for one of the greatest movies of all time.

  4. The Mellow Monkey says

    Moggie

    That reads more like part of a Grandpa Simpson anecdote than the source material for one of the greatest movies of all time.

    Jules was wearing an onion on his belt, which was the style at the time…

  5. johnwoodford says

    I had blotted that particular subplot from my mind. Not so the one about Michael’s adventure hiding out in Sicily. He falls in lust with a teenager and marries her (while already married in the US, and with the full approval of the girl’s family). Then she conveniently gets killed by a car bomb set by rivals of the Corleone family, giving him an incentive to go home and clean house. Even as a teenager I thought that was pretty skeevy.

  6. Hairhead, whose head is entirely filled with Too Much Stuff says

    I remember reading the Godfather when it came out. I was surprised at the cartoon-like nature of a lot of it — Santino’s enormous penis being the prime example. But then, (and this was the ’70’s), I found a quote from Puzo in some writer’s magazine; I paraphrase slightly here, but the meaning is clear.

    And just to put it in context, Mario had previously been talking about his nearly twenty years trying to write the Great American Novel, getting published with trash in men’s magazines, and serious literary stuff in small journals. Never enough to really make a living. Then came this:

    “I looked in the mirror and said to myself: ‘You’re in your mid-forties, you’ve got four kids, and a pile of debt — it’s time to grow up and sell out.'”

    And then he wrote The Godfather, specifically to be a trashy, lowest-common-denominator best seller.

    And it worked!

  7. Hairhead, whose head is entirely filled with Too Much Stuff says

    I went to work to find the quote I referenced above, and found this:

    “In the foreword of his 1972 autobiography, “The Godfather Papers & Other Confessions”, he explains that “The Godfather”, though a best seller, was his least favorite book . . .”

  8. says

    Heh. Ever read “The Graduate”? Um, the movie’s better….

    Actually, I was surprised at how many of the funny lines I’d assumed were Buck Henry’s were in the book already.

  9. robertrichter says

    I used to assume the book was *always* better than the movie. Then I realized that was just because I don’t read many terrible books.

  10. nothere says

    I loved the film “Witches of Eastwick”, but I threw the book in the trash after reading it.

  11. scienceavenger says

    Forget the book, I’ve always though the movie was way overrated. Great acting sure, and technically it was good, but the story was…not much of one. Get angry, kill all your enemies. Deep man.

  12. vaiyt says

    I remember I enjoyed the organized crime drama part of the book a lot more than how it was depicted in the movie, but even at the time I thought the book in general was chauvinist as fuck.

  13. twas brillig (stevem) says

    My only reading of “that book” was being told by another of the Scouts (BSA) that one should read pages xx-yy for a “good time” {wink, wink, nudge, nudge}. So I found the book, on sale at a neighborhood department store, and opened the book to those pages. Read them while standing there, It was the sex scene, of course, and, inevitably, one of the shopkeeps sees me and whispers, “this is a _store_, not a library.” So I quickly put the book back on the display rack and quickly leave, totally embarrassed.
    From what I’ve heard about the movie, is that it is one of those where the sequel is better than the first; ie Godfather II vs The Godfather. But IDK, never saw either of them.

  14. ledasmom says

    Two out of three of my bar-trivia group have read “The Godfather”, and the vagina subplot is pretty much the only thing either of us remembers about the book. “The Godfather”, movie or book, comes up a lot at bar trivia, and one or the other of us brings this subplot up every time.

  15. Nick Gotts says

    What is a metaphor? – vaiyt@18

    His enormous penis. It’s actually an enormous… metaphor.

  16. Marc Abian says

    Mellow Monkey,

    You have no idea what a Simpsons reference does for my estimation of you. And I liked you already.

  17. microraptor says

    I had blotted that particular subplot from my mind. Not so the one about Michael’s adventure hiding out in Sicily. He falls in lust with a teenager and marries her (while already married in the US, and with the full approval of the girl’s family). Then she conveniently gets killed by a car bomb set by rivals of the Corleone family, giving him an incentive to go home and clean house. Even as a teenager I thought that was pretty skeevy.

    All it needed was for his wife’s body to get stuffed in the fridge by an assassin for Michael to find later.

  18. microraptor says

    but even at the time I thought the book in general was chauvinist as fuck.

    Which, to be fair, is to the best of my knowledge an extremely accurate depiction of how organized crime families were/are in real life, too. Not that it excuses it, but it wasn’t fabricated just for the book.

  19. pacal says

    In my opinion the best example of terrible novel becomes great movie is Gone With the Wind. The novel is badly written, turgid crap and just to top off the literary horror that it is it is also racist. The movie is however a wonderful movie. How they transmuted pig shit into gold is a miracle.

  20. says

    I read the book two years ago, and the big vagina parts legitimately take up 10-20% of the book. It has absolutely nothing to do with the main story arc, and is terrible. The book also kind of endorses eugenics. All around, very bad.

  21. greg hilliard says

    “Jaws” is similar, not so much in the writing but in the use of a subplot (diver’s affair with sheriff’s wife) that Spielberg wisely cut from the movie, which is a classic.

  22. edmundog says

    The book/movie store where I worked this summer had a theme weekend celebrating the intesection of those two. TV and movie based on books, and vice versa. I wore a homemade T-shirt boldly labeled “the movie was better”, and covered with pictures of examples. As I recall, I had The Godfather, Forrest Gump, Jurassic Park, Big Fish, Who Censored Roger Rabbit, and Fight Club.

  23. Holms says

    This is also how Saving Private Ryan ends. “Earn this.”

    More like how Saving Ryan’s Privates ends, yukkity yuk.

    #13 ChasCPeterson
    Smug smuggity
    smugsmug.

    Same ol’ Chas.

  24. says

    Yeah, it’s generally agreed by film historians that Coppola elevated pulp trash to art. It helped in that Paramount pursued him to direct the film; The Godfather was not his project. And he agreed to do it only if they let him do his own passion project, The Conversation, right after. So because he had no deep undying love for the book, Coppola felt free to approach the film in his own way, and ignore what wasn’t good about it.

  25. Greta Christina says

    Can’t believe I’m the first one to link to Storm Large’s “Eight Miles Wide”! (Warning: Hilarious and very sticky ear-worm.)

    “My vagina is 8 miles wide
    Absolutely everyone can come inside
    If you’re ever frightened just run and hide
    My vagina is 8 miles wide”

    http://songmeanings.com/songs/view/3530822107858824494/

    FYI, I (a) read The Godfather 53,000 times in middle school, (b) passed it around among all the other giggly middle schoolers, with the dirty and violent passages dog-eared (I actually used it with a student who had trouble reading and who I was supposed to be helping — it sure did get him interested in reading!), and (c) thought for years afterwards that Ginormous Vagina-itis was actually a real thing, and was terrified that I would have it.

    (BTW, you HAVE to read the comments on this one. One of them made me laugh so hard, I literally fell over in my seat on the train.

  26. astro says

    i remember making the ghastly mistake of reading “trainspotting.” that may have been the first time it really crystallized for me that bad bad books sometimes are made into movies.

    i never read “godfather,” but i am reminded that film and books are different media, and our expectations of each should be different.

  27. chigau (違う) says

    So, I just watched the “8 miles wide” video, in Greta’s #33
    I insist.
    Everyone watch it.
    I INSIST!!!

  28. vaiyt says

    Which, to be fair, is to the best of my knowledge an extremely accurate depiction of how organized crime families were/are in real life, too. Not that it excuses it, but it wasn’t fabricated just for the book.

    The ironic part is that the opinions of women in the book are routinely dismissed by guys who try their best to keep the pretense of a wholesome Italian household while murdering their own relatives on the side.

  29. HappyNat says

    Glad to now know, “8 Miles Wide”, should make for an interesting bed time song tomorrow night, I was loving it, but closing with Pixies Vigantic riff pushed it over the edge.

  30. jijoya says

    As a kids, we’d often get Italian movies and TV series in the Eastern Bloc, and I was really, really into those dealing with the mafia, so as soon as I managed to get my hands on the book, I read it. I was extremely underwhelmed but because everyone was going on and ON about how great the movies are (and in my experience to date, books were always better, even when the movies were great), I decided it was the translator’s fault. Evidently it wasn’t. Good to know.

    (For the record, I finally watched the first 2 movies relatively recently, and felt utterly cheated by my own brain because I didn’t like them either. I love Goodfellas though.)