Buy my totes, people. 40% OFF!

This is your semi-regular reminder that the work I do here—and yes, it is work—is not without its costs, timewise and otherwise. So I am making it easy for you to buy cool stuff, and then you buy it! I get a (small) cut, and you get cool stuff. WIN-WIN.

40% off all tote bags through Sunday

Just look at these beauties! Huh? HUH?!

dtstotes2x2Do your part to shake humans from their stupor and break the hypnotic spell of the enemy rodents carrying these striking totes—BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!

Buy 1, 2, 3…


Now perhaps (for some inexplicable reason I will never, ever understand) dead squirrels are not Your Thing. Not to worry! IRIS HAS YOU COVERED.

conservativetearstote CONSERVATIVE TEARS Tote
Soothe your rabid rage at right-wing blowhards and repel conservatives from your general vicinity with this nifty tote!


medicareforalltote MEDICARE FOR ALL Tote
Help drag the USA up to the standards of 20th century civilization by demanding single payer health care NOW!
psptotewht perry street palace™ Tote
For my Many Tens of Loyal Readers™ at Perry Street Palace™, now’s your chance to join the Official Palace Army™! Demonstrate devotion to Your Humble Monarch™ while shamelessly shilling for Iris’s other blog! Proudly announce to all the world your support for the senseless abuse of Trademark Symbols™!
irisiseeyoutote IRIS IRIS Tote
Research shows that people tend to behave more ethically when cued that they’re being watched: adorning yourself with this eye-catching (<-hahaha) tote bag instantly improves the behavior of everyone around you! IRIS SEES YOU. #creepychic


and save 40%

WHAT?! You aren’t in the market for a tote bag? You can shop for other exclusive items here. Or you could just, you know, pay me money:


All proceeds to fund subverting the status quo, smashing the patriarchy, dismantling white supremacy, waging war on warmongers, obliterating the oligarchy, sustaining struggling friends, monitoring the squirrel menace, mocking conservatives and/or cat food.


Thanks for your support.