The Future of Therapy: Cat GPT

I finally signed into Chat GPT myself instead of just forcing my boyfriend to use it for me. Perhaps it’s for the best I went solo on this because I had an important question about our relationship. How do you feel about Chat GPT’s answer?

Great American Satan:  i accidentally called my boyfriend by my cat’s name.  i also accidentally tried to feed him cat food.  did i do these things because i subconsciously believe he is a cat?  that would not be good.  why did i treat my boyfriend like a cat?

Chat GPT:  As an AI language model, I don’t have access to your subconscious thoughts or feelings, so I cannot say for certain why you made these mistakes. However, it’s important to remember that accidents happen, and it’s possible that you simply made an innocent mistake.

It’s also possible that your mind was preoccupied with your cat, and you were simply distracted when you called your boyfriend by your cat’s name or tried to feed him cat food. It’s important to take a step back and evaluate the situation without jumping to conclusions about your subconscious thoughts or beliefs.

If you’re concerned about your behavior towards your boyfriend, it may be helpful to reflect on your relationship and any underlying feelings or issues that may be causing you to act in this way. Consider talking to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist about your concerns. They can offer an outside perspective and help you work through any issues you may be experiencing.

The struggle is real.  When Mochi was alive and not feeling enthusiastic about eating, I’d taken to tapping his food bowl and scooting it toward him to get his attention and trigger his tracking instinct.  One time I not only put the cat food on my boyfriend’s desk, I tapped it and scooted it toward him.  Just tonight I was low key busting my boyfriend’s chops and started to call him Hecubus.  But then, my boyfriend is what tumblrites are calling “a pathetic little meow-meow.”

I’m running a fundraiser through April 21st!  Donate at least $3 and you can suggest a word to me that I will rhyme in a rap.  If I just get a few bucks, this rap will be a text poem.  If I reach $500 I will record myself rapping.  If I reach $600 I will do a short video.  Help cover a medical situation, thanks! –goal achieved, fundraiser closed.


  1. says

    I was thinking something called “CatGPT” would advise you to knock your boyfriend’s stuff off a table, or feed your cat human food instead of vice versa, or maybe claw up your boyfriend’s trousers.

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