Your Prayers Mean So Much To Me

We thank you for your heartfelt prayers;
We know they helped a lot.
In times like these, it’s nice to know
How many friends we’ve got

So many folks concerned enough
To bow their heads and pray;
It makes us smile while struggling through
Our many tasks each day

It’s tough to do the household chores
With both of us in pain
But hey, you’re busy praying, so
We really can’t complain

Of hands in prayer, and hands at work,
I’m sure you know the saying—
And yeah, the lawn could use a trim,
But really, thanks for praying
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Obligatory 9/11 Post

It’s the day the world changed
When we learned who we are,
And united in strength and in sorrow
When we opened our eyes
And the lessons we learned
We will never forget… till tomorrow.

The memorials are indeed moving, and even the Sunday comics section has brought tears to my eyes, but I can’t help but notice that “the lessons of 9/11” have an uncanny tendency to be “I was right”, no matter what political or social position “I” happened to hold on 9/10.

9/11 Conspiracy Theorists Eat Their Own

If you look at all the evidence
There’s only one conclusion:
A government conspiracy
And not just mass confusion.
The seeming contradictions are
Quite easy to condemn;
You say that they’re convincing? Why,
You must be one of them.

Podblack just sent me a link to a series of stories on Slate on 9/11 conspiracy theorists (“Truthers”). I find these people fascinating–I know a handful of them personally–and a wonderful example of belief perseverance in the wild. The linked story is quite unusual (but see below*) in that it reports, in part, on truthers who have come to doubt the consipiracies they have long supported.

More after the jump:
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The Credible Threat

There is a lot of talk about a current “credible threat” of terrorism on the anniversary of 9/11. I suspect I am thinking of a different man than “they” are.

If a man whom you met
Was a “credible threat”
There’s no way that you’d let
Him evade you
And if somehow you knew
Your suspicion was true
What could anyone do
To dissuade you?

You’re the patriot type
And you’re not one to gripe
But you see through the hype
That they feed you
And you’re always aware
And you think that it’s fair
For your country, you’re there
When they need you.

With the hour growing late
There is no more debate
There are people who hate
And detest us
And they’ll cheat and they’ll lie
(Which they’ll always deny)
Through their teeth, as they’re try-
ing to best us

A religious extrem-
ist whose ultimate dream
Is that faith will redeem
Us, is scary
There’s a face in that frame
And we learn, to our shame
That this lunatic’s name…

Is Rick Perry
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Facebook Jesus?

If you’re looking for salvation, you don’t have to go to church
It’s the age of the computer, you can type it in and search
And you’ll find the words of Jesus from the comfort of your perch
Whether honest absolution, or you’d rather just pretend
Go to Facebook, and get Jesus as your friend

In a time of pain and trouble, one occasionally seeks
Words of comfort and support—the sort of thing that Jesus speaks
Wrapped in widdle kitty pictures! Hey, it’s marketing techniques
Cast your troubles to the internets, just close your eyes and “send”
Go to Facebook, and get Jesus as your friend

It’s a service to the people, and now millions daily try it
You would have to be a cynic to condemn it or deny it
And of course they’ll sell you supplements to help you with your diet
If you need someone to help you, and on whom you can depend
Go to Facebook, and get Jesus as your friend

It’s the minimum of effort; you can “like” Him with a click
He will comfort you in sorrow; maybe heal you if you’re sick
Or his answer might be “not today”—remember, that’s his schtick
It’s a saccharine collection of the worst stuff ever penned
But on Facebook, you’ve got Jesus as your friend

You are battling with cancer; you have bills you need to pay
You’ve been laid off at the factory; your spouse just ran away
There’s a list of looming problems, growing longer every day
Your relationships are rocky and your marriage at an end
But on Facebook, you’ve got Jesus as your friend

Thoughts, after the jump:
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Re: “Ungodly Discipline”

The church that runs the boarding house where little girls are beaten
Finds the media attention rather odd
It exemplifies the problem with America today—
We put little children’s safety over God.

The republicans out courting votes, to energize their base
Call the global warming scientist a fraud
“We are taking back the country from the liberals, because
They trust scientific findings over God.”

A polygamist in prison, on a hunger strike for days
Thinks his trial was a ludicrous façade
And the problem with humanity is obvious to all
We’ve been following the law instead of God.

As I look through all the stories I see daily in the papers
I see we use our language rather oddly
To describe the sick behavior that religions may engender
We too often use the adjective “ungodly”

thoughts, after the jump:
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Headline Muse, 8/30

Some may say I am lax in my morals
Though I’m not one to advertise quarrels
I’m a bad, selfish man,
And because of my tan
We’re both mining and killing the corals

Headline: Coral could hold key to sunscreen pill

Ok, I can’t wrap my head around two stories recently in the news. First…. Human effluent (sewage, or shit, to you and me), pumped into the ocean, is killing corals. That’s about a week old. Literally, we are shitting on the ocean and killing it.

And now this week. The beeb tells us that “Scientists hope to harness coral’s natural defence…” against what? really, it doesn’t matter why, but in this case it is to make sunscreens. Fucking sunscreens. “By studying a few samples of the endangered Acropora coral…” Oh, it’s ok, “they will copy the genetic code the coral uses to make the compounds and put it into bacteria in the lab that can rapidly replicate to produce large quantities of it.”

“Dr Long said: ‘We couldn’t and wouldn’t want to use the coral itself as it is an endangered species.'”

So they’ll strip the information from the coral genes, then test it on scraps of skin left over from tummy tucks… seriously, check the link, I am not making this up. A product designed to enhance future vanity, tested on the byproducts of current vanity.

We are sooooooo fucked.