Americans, Get Off Your Asses And Vote

You think it’s a toss-up?
You don’t want to vote?
You think there’s no difference
Or nothing of note?
You’re thinking of sitting it out?

You don’t see a difference
That merits attention
There’s no one to vote for,
Or even to mention
You’d rather just sit home and pout?

You think it’s decided?
Then go, and be vocal,
Make waves where they’re needed
And vote in the local
Elections, for city and state

The national picture
Is one part of many;
The local and state races
Show us that any-
One’s vote could determine our fate

You want to stay silent?
You think you’re not needed?
Your view won’t be counted?
Then they have succeeded,
Convincing you, give up the fight!

The truth is, you matter
In districts and states;
Your vote makes a difference
To so many fates;
So do it…, cos, frankly, it’s right.

Ok, the truth is, the national vote matters. A lot. Number one, for me… the Supreme Court. Vote for your rights. But yeah, even if you want to “protest the vote” by not voting (which, just to let you know, is utterly indistiguishable from not voting because you don’t care, or because you are an idiot), you really do want to vote, because (yeah, surprise!) there are more people on the ballot!

If you really honestly don’t want any of the candidates, and want to protest… vote Cuttlefish. I promise, I’ll let them know. If you don’t give a rat’s ass who wins… vote Cuttlefish. I’ll take it; I don’t care. If you have a difficult time realizing that the person you are voting for has a decent chance of running your country… vote Cuttlefish. Again, I’ll accept those votes.

But if the notion of voting for some pseudonymous internet person bothers you… get the fuck out and vote for one of the actual candidates.

And then donate money to the Cuttlefish campaign anyway. I mean, if you are still thinking about this at this point, I have a better than usual chance that you might actually want to throw some money at me, don’t you think?

TL;DR: if you are one of my readers, the odds are you are voting the way I am. So go vote. If you stumbled upon this site while looking for prayer messages… it’s ok, you can stay home.

(Yes, I cut and pasted everything above from 2 years ago. It’s still true.)


  1. Die Anyway says

    I WILL go vote…about 11 hours from now, after my morning bike ride. Most of my votes will be protest votes in some manner or other. Third party candidates, women, minorities, and people whose last name starts with Z are more likely to get my vote unless I specifically know something bad about them. Michelle Bachmann and Sarah Palin wouldn’t get my vote no matter how many of my categories they fit into. And since I’m voting in Florida, Pam Bondi falls into that same group. I want to vote for women but, damn, some of them are just determined to make it impossible.

  2. zackoz says

    Good luck, USA!

    The omens don’t look good, but I’m crossing my fingers.

    I’m still baffled that anyone would vote Republican, but US politics has always confused me.

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