Why Can’t You Just Meet Me Halfway?

I love to start fires; it’s just what I do—
I’ve started them all over town—
But recently, folks have begun to complain,
And they’re working on shutting me down.

I’m just having fun, but they say that it’s wrong;
I’m a danger, or that’s what they say
I want lots of fires; they’re screaming for none:
Why can’t they just meet me half way?

I’ve asked them to sit and negotiate terms
But they’ll call me “extremist”, I’ll bet—
They’re ranting and raving; I’m asking politely…
Just how many fires can I set?

Cuttlecap tip to Dana, under the radar.


  1. stever says

    My favorite response to lunatics’ proposal of “compromise” is a quote that I can’t find the source of: “Mixing champagne and sewage yields sewage.”

  2. Cuttlefish says

    I looked, and found too many sources to reasonably assert that one was the original, the notion that “if you take a barrel of sewage and a teaspoon of wine, you get a barrel of sewage; if you take a teaspoon of sewage and a barrel of wine, you get a barrel of sewage.”

  3. Trebuchet says

    Cuttlefish, I’m confused. Was this in reference to a particular post of Dana’s, or does “under the radar” indicate she sent you something directly? I’m certainly not seeing anything in her blog. (I’ve met IRL, by the way!)

  4. R Johnston says

    From approximately the time of the first Obama inauguration:

    I really don’t understand how bipartisanship is ever going to work when one of the parties is insane. Imagine trying to negotiate an agreement on dinner plans with your date, and you suggest Italian and she states her preference would be a meal of tire rims and anthrax. If you can figure out a way to split the difference there and find a meal you will both enjoy, you can probably figure out how bipartisanship is going to work the next few years.

    Too obvious to be prescient, but it’s a quote about the futility of compromise with bad faith idiots that I’ve gone back to several times over the years.

  5. rq says

    Trebuchet, the connection is made clearer today. ;)
    And a fine connection indeed.


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