Almost Heaven

County Rt. 1
Is not very fun;
It’s bumpy, and narrow, and curving.
It’s missing its shoulders,
Has potholes and boulders,
And driving it’s frankly unnerving.
Traversing its length
Takes all of your strength;
It will measure the courage that’s in ya–
I have crawled to its end
And I can’t recommend
The destroy-your-car state, West Virginia.

My apologies for a few days of radio silence; I was on the road. Lots of driving, lots of bad weather to drive in, more than a few tears (I visited my brother’s grave), and no internet from Thursday morning till late last night. So this post has nothing to do with anything major in the world, but serves as a warning to anyone thinking of driving in West Virginia.

Don’t. Just… don’t.

Go the other way. If you have to, make sure you have a car that is easy to lift.

I’m just sayin’.


  1. says

    Man, what a fake-out. I started that to the tune (thanks to the post title) but quickly found out there was no way to force it into that scansion…

  2. says

    I remember West Virginia being lovely…but then, I wasn't doing the driving… Brilliant verse– this one goes straight to my dad, who *was* doing the driving:-))(Sincere condolences– and, no need for apologies. Everybody has lives–was just offline myself with three sick boys:-))

  3. entropy says

    Sounds like everything I've ever heard about WV roads, only more succinctly stated, and in wonderful verse.

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