Bad Atheist Tropes »« Why I am an atheist – Marty Heath

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  1. Serendipitydawg (gods are my minus one Kelvin) says

    That child definitely looks like Mongomery Burns saying his first ever Excellent!

  2. Ms. Daisy Cutter says

    What Ken Larson said: It’s Scott Brundage. The image can be found as a Java rollover here (fourth pic down on the left).

  3. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    Nope. You keep putting up Xmas themed posts, PZ, and I’m still not feeling jolly or full of holiday spirit, or whateverthefuck.

    I still hate this time of year.

    /Scrooge

  4. Brother Ogvorbis, OM . . . Really? says

    Looking at that image, I was reminded of the day that I realized there was no Santa Claus.

    Death Valley has only recently become a National Park. Prior to about 1990, it was a National Monument because there were still active mining claims within the boundary. One of the prospectors who had quite a few of those claims was an elderly gentlman named FlapJack Pete (no idea his real name). We knew him when we lived at DEVA.

    When I was 7, we moved to Grand Canyon. Santa used to come to Babbit’s General Store in December. One day, I walked in, looked at Santa, and said, “Hey, FlapJack, how you doing? Taking some time off in the winter?”

    Sure enough, it was FlapJack Pete and my sisters and I spent about an hour talking with him about Death Valley. And I realized Santa was not real. But FlapJack Pete was cool on so many levels.

  5. Beatrice, anormalement indécente says

    I still hate this time of year.

    /Scrooge

    Me too.
    *waves in a decidedly non-jolly way*

  6. Scott Simmons says

    In my son’s high school German class, the teacher was doing oral examinations one student at a time out in the hall. The other class members, instead of just waiting their turns quietly as you’d expect HS freshmen to do (wink), spent their time ‘improving’ the holiday-themed drawings the teacher had on her whiteboard. This picture is a good illustration of what my son did to her Santa sketch.

    I’m so proud.

  7. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    Beatrice:

    *waves in a decidedly non-jolly way*

    *waves back!*

    Care for a champagne cocktail, B?

    Us Scrooges gotta stick together, you know?

  8. shouldbeworking says

    Yippee! One week until Christmas. One week of classes then two weeks off and final exams! Oh, you meant present buying and stuff. Rats, only one week until Xmas…

    [panic = on]

  9. Beatrice, anormalement indécente says

    Care for a champagne cocktail, B?

    Us Scrooges gotta stick together, you know?

    Oh yes, thank you.

    See, this is so much better than Christmas spirit.

  10. 'Tis Himself, OM says

    I still hate this time of year.

    You are not having jolly, holly and other words ending in olly time?

  11. shouldbeworking says

    I always hated what happened to Scrooge at the end of the movie. Why not have a good ending, instead of that cravity-inducing Pollyanna one?

  12. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    ‘Tis:

    You are not having jolly, holly and other words ending in olly time?

    No.

    The holidays are nothing short of a pain in the ass– I’ve felt that way for years now. Plus, the rampant over-consumption is disgusting.

    Things are made doubly worse ‘cos we celebrate both Xmas and Hanukkah and I don’t want to do either.

    *sigh*

    shouldbeworking:

    Why not have a good ending, instead of that cravity-inducing Pollyanna one?

    It’s been years since I’ve read A Christmas Carol, but I’m pretty sure that’s how the book ended, too. You know, Scrooge learning the joy of Xmas and family and whatnot. It would be pretty pointless, otherwise.

  13. shouldbeworking says

    The bones would be good for making soup. Gotta have some way of using up the leftovers.

  14. The Rat King says

    You better watch out,
    You better not cry,
    Better not pout,
    I’m telling you why:
    Santa Claus is coming to town.
    He’s making a list,
    And checking it twice;
    Gonna find out
    Who’s naughty and nice.
    Santa Claus is coming to town.

    He sees you when you’re sleeping.
    He knows when you’re awake.
    He knows if you’ve been bad or good,
    So be good for goodness sake!
    Oh, you better watch out!
    You better not cry.
    Better not pout,
    I’m telling you why:
    Santa Claus is coming to town.
    Santa Claus is coming to town!

    Now read it a second time in a gravelly, grinning-maniac sort of voice.

  15. reynoldhall says

    “Octoclause”? Phphph! I could take him…anyone “knows” that anything without a spin is no much for anyone WITH a spine*!

    *”Ka-CLICK!!* (sound of magazine being clicked into place)….anyone up for some christmas calamari??

    Well, to tide you all over, for those who don’t care for Agnostica, you can always have a very scary solstice.

    Some choice tunes from the latter site which you can actually download it seems:

    It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Fish-Men
    Great Old Ones Are Coming to Town
    The Carol of the Olde Ones
    Freddy the Red Brained Mi-Go
    Oh Cthulhu Chorus
    Do You Fear What I Fear?
    Awake Ye Scary Great Old Ones
    I’m Dreaming of a Dead City
    Cthulhu Lives
    Tentacles

  16. reynoldhall says

    Lyrics to “The Great Old Ones Are Coming to Town“:

    You’d better watch out; you’d better go hide.
    An Elder Sign is needed for this Yuletide.
    Great Old Ones are coming to town.

    They’re making a fist and shaking it twice.
    They’re going to hit you naughty or nice.
    Great Old Ones are coming to town.

    They’re bringing ugly shoggoths, And horrid Deep Ones too.
    Shub Niggurath is waking up,
    And so is Cthulhu.

    So you’d better watch out, you’d better go ‘way,
    Before the big guy comes up from R’lyeh.
    Great Old Ones are coming town.

  17. says

    As much as I loathe this time of year, I am getting a huge kick out of the H P Lovecraft Historical Society’s “Very Scary Solstice”.

    Have a taste!

    Away in a madhouse, confined to my bed
    From visions and nightmares that filled me with dread
    The Doctor has sweetly inserted a probe
    To sever completely my prefrontal lobe

    Electroshock therapy, mind-numbing pills:
    They change my behavior to cure all my ills
    I love Arkham Asylum, my own padded cell
    I’ll stay here forever, for outside it’s Hell