Quantcast

«

»

Aug 30 2011

The Truth (As He Sees It)

So today or yesterday, I saw a letter to the editor in a local paper, chastising the editor for something mean said about Rick Perry. The writer was planning on voting for Perry, because “He tells us the truth as he sees it.”

The following is written in the West Texas song tradition, and may be sung with guitar, small band, or just a harmonica by the fireside. Yodeling, however, is a must. It’s a sweet 3/4 time, just a little bit faster than “Waltz Across Texas With You”.

“He tells us the truth as he sees it”
That surely deserves our respect
His view is not sullied by knowledge, or facts,
Or intelligence we can detect.
He’s a church-going, god-fearing Christian
And he’s honest as Sunday is long
There’s nothing that tempts him to change his beliefs
Like the fact that they’re utterly wrong

(yodeling part)

He’s suspicious of climate-change science
Evolution, and the age of the earth
But he’s steadfast and true in his ignorant stance
His resistance to change shows his worth
In hundreds of life-and-death matters
His was always the right choice to make
Though it’s better to execute innocent men
Than admit he could make a mistake

(more yodeling)

See, it just doesn’t pay to be truthful
When consistency makes you look right
If correcting mistakes made you rise in the polls
Then he would. Or he should. Or he might.
But it’s me, and the rest of us voters;
If we checked, then we likely could tell
Still we vote for the one with the prettiest lies
And together, we waltz off to Hell.

(A bit more yodeling)

And together, we waltz off to Hell.

12 comments

1 ping

Skip to comment form

  1. 1
    MikeMa

    Perry’s pandering pollutes the political process.

    Nowhere near as creative as Cuttlefish but talent finds it’s own level! Cheers.

  2. 2
    redwood

    Great song, the anapest rhythm had me galumpin’ along in 3/4 time even before you mentioned the waltz. I could really see this being sung in a crowded honky-tonk by someone with one of those sincere country twangs–with the listeners slowly waking up to the meaning of the lyrics and getting royally pissed off.

  3. 3
    Cuttlefish

    You, Redwood, as they say… got it. On further rumination, I do hear a fiddle after the second yodeling break. Damn, I want more musicians to read this blog!

  4. 4
    Physicalist

    It’s been a couple decades since I’ve sung at an Open Mic, but if I were to do so again, I’d sing this tune.

  5. 5
    F (entropy)

    Ha! Friggin’ awesome. I actually heard music!

  6. 6
    longhorn10

    This is brilliant! As an escaped Texan, I can delight in the music. As a rationalist, I can connect with the message. Thanks for writing this one.

  7. 7
    The Lorax

    I find it strange how people can like people like Bill O’Reilly because… they’re stubborn. They stick to their guns. … this is a good thing? I thought open-mindedness was preferable. Not so open that your brain falls out, but still. People HATE me because I’m stubborn… is it because I’m not a politician?

    He’s liked because he keeps his song
    Even if we prove him wrong
    I don’t get it.

  8. 8
    Sam K.

    also goes great to the tune of “American Pie” :)

  9. 9
    Sam K.

    Clearly this is missing with my sense of reality, too…

    I meant “Piano Man”!

  10. 10
    AlanMac

    “He’s a drug store, truck drivin’ man”

  11. 11
    Rune C. Olwen

    Yodeling is a good idea towards this handsome candidate.

    (I do hope I don´t get indicted by US PC laws for using the “dumb blonde”-stereotype on a man)

    I wanted to say for a long time that I enjoy your site, Cuttlefish.

  12. 12
    Dr. Strabismus (WGP) of Utrecht

    Cuttlefish:

    I do hope you sent this in to the newspaper that printed that inspirational letter?

  1. 13
    In which I am unimpressed with Hitchens | Pharyngula

    [...] like Cuttlefish’s take on Perry better, even if it does include Texas yodeling. Share this:PrintEmailDiggRedditStumbleUpon Posted [...]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite="" class=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>