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Monthly Archive: November 2008

Nov 30 2008

Atheist Holiday Cards, Part One

Yesterday morning, I picked up the newspaper, and it had the familiar red envelope we have come to expect this time of year, the mass-produced, signature-stamped, highly religious Christmas card from the guy who delivers our papers. We will likely get another from the other paper, and one or more from the postal carriers. Sometimes …

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Nov 29 2008

“More fun than beer and pretzels”

Thanks to reader Ron Sullivan, I have my first review up on Lulu! So, since I am much too modest to adequately promote my own book, I will quote his review, and smile broadly to myself. I got my copy of The Digital Cuttlefish, Vol.1 via snailmail on Monday, and I’m thrilled to have it. …

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Nov 28 2008

The Morning After Thanksgiving At The Cuttlefish House

Last night, as I slept, very unlike a log,Our garbage-can served as a feast for the dog.I awoke to a smell which I sadly knew meantThat she’d taken a dump on my room’s heating vent(She’s a very old dog, very grey in the jowls, And losing all conscious control of her bowels)As the temperature dropped, …

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Nov 27 2008

An Atheist’s Thanksgiving II: This Time It’s Personal

I have so many people to thank this Thanksgiving–including you, if you are reading this (which you are). If you recognize yourself in the following verses, you are quite right. That’s you. If you don’t recognize yourself, don’t worry–none of it is made up; that verse just happens to be about someone else. One verse …

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Nov 25 2008

Another Atheist Christmas Song (not mine)

Nothing from me right now–getting ready for classes one last time before Thanksgiving. I have so many people to give thanks to, too. With any luck, I will have time to properly do so. For now, though, a little more evidence that the Bill O’Reilly’s of the world, with their images of an atheist war …

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Nov 22 2008

The War (on Christmas) Comes Early

From the Cape of Good Hope to the Newfoundland islands,The sands of Iran to the Panama isthmus;From Outback Australia to Inverness HighlandsIt’s time to take arms in the War Against Christmas! My weapons are mistletoe, Christmas trees, holly,A yule-log, and caroling out in the snow;Sleigh-rides and snowball-fights, eggnog and JollyOld Santa Claus, laughing his loud …

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Nov 21 2008

The Atheist As Scapegoat

Leviticus 16 instructs us on how to properly atone for our sins… it involves two goats and a bull, and specific rituals for sprinkling blood. Trust me. It also describes the role of one of those two goats, known as the scapegoat; this goat basically gets all of our sins cast upon it, then is …

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Nov 20 2008

The Digital Pack-Rat, volume 7

From the upcoming Cuttlefish Xmas Songbook (in my dreams): And so this is ChristmasSo back to the war–It’s time to rememberWhat Christmas is forAn so this is ChristmasLet’s make a big fussCos Christmas is onlyFor people like us. A very merry ChristmasAnd a happy New YearUnless you are godlessUnless you are queer. And so this …

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Nov 19 2008

Throat In A Jar?

The same methodology used to produceThe remarkable “heart in a jar”Has created a trachea, almost from scratch,And it looks like it’s working, so far!The organ was made from the stem cells extractedFrom marrow they drew from her hip,And a collagen shell from a donor cadaverWhose windpipe was one they could snip.The trachea, treated with antibioticsAnd …

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Nov 18 2008

Limerick Contest!!!! (not mine….)

First, the contest (not mine), then the limericks, then a silly story. The contest is here–and here, I suppose, if you want to see the competition. A limerick contest! Better than that–a Darwin Limerick Contest! With prizes and everything! (see links for details, but it is pretty simple–Darwin-themed limericks.) I have seen what my readers …

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