Donald Trump has been sued (again!) for inciting violence by urging his bodyguards and his supporters to physically attack critics and protestors at events that he attends. As part of the case, he had to submit to a legal deposition towards the end of last year and in the course of it, he expressed fears about reports that he might be pelted with fruit, especially tomatoes.
The Daily Show‘s Trevor Noah say that no comedy writer could match the quality of the humor in the deposition transcript and to prove it he and Michael Kosta read verbatim from the it. That five-minute segment begins at the 5:45 mark.
I, like Noah, had not known about this case and was surprised to hear about it. It just shows how much news we are bombarded with about Trump’s legal shenanigans that even him being forced to give a legal deposition, something we know he hates, slipped under the radar.
As an aside, a long time ago I read an article by someone whose name I have forgotten but the title I remember. It was Hard Times, Hard Tomatoes and the author was investigating why tomatoes these days seem dry and tasteless, nowhere close to the juicy, flavorful tomatoes he had eaten as a child. It is true, eating a tomato does not give one much satisfaction. It turned out that the degradation of tomatoes can be traced back to the mechanization of farming practices, where the picking of tomatoes was increasingly being done by machines. As a result, tomatoes were being bred to have hard, thick skins so as to not be bruised by the machines when being picked and the price paid was in the taste and texture.
So Trump may have had a point when he expressed fears about being hit by a tomato. As to fears about pineapples, that is a bit much. Sure, a pineapple has spikes and is hard but you cannot easily sneak a pineapple into a venue without being noticed. Furthermore, it is heavy and you would need someone with professional quarterback capabilities to throw one any distance with any accuracy.
As for a possible banana attack, if Trump had attended the self-defense classes taught by John Cleese, he would have known how to defend himself in that situation.