You may not be interested, but I passed my physical exam. Blood pressure is perfect, cholesterol levels are so low the doctor has cut my statin dosage in half, I’ve apparently got the healthy body of a 67 year old.
I even got a perfect score on the cognitive test, which means I’m at least as smart as Donald Trump. My annual performance review is coming up this month, I’m planning to tell the university that my doctor said I was cognitively flawless, so gimme a raise. At the very least, I’m going to brag to everyone that I remembered “apple, penny, table” for a whole couple of minutes. Like I’m doing right here.
I also got a couple of vaccines, one for tetanus, another for pneumonia. My immune system is now mighty.
Did your doctor have you do a balance test? You may have to be a lot older like me, but I had several of them in the last year. One of them was the 10-second balance test where you stand on one foot for 10 seconds. One nurse muttered something about a requirement from Medicare or the insurance company, but I’m not sure about that. In any case, falling is one of the leading causes of injury and death among us older folks. I managed to pass and I’m working on improving my “core strength” because I do teeter.
I was asked if I’d had any falls in the past year, but I hadn’t, which is kind of a miracle in icy Minnesota. No balance tests, though.
“Table” always seems to be one of the 3 words. In spite of that, I usually get only 2 out of the 3 words. I’m old—not “older”, just old.
The balance test, I usually pass, using my arms as balancers/outriggers.
The only test I’ve consistently excelled at, is hand grip strength. It’s supposedly a sign of cognitive stability, or decline. So, I’ll continue to work on my hand strength. It should help keep my brain alive. It works that way, right?
Yes me too.
Geras.
https://www.greekmythology.com/Other_Gods/Geras/geras.html
But which Greek god? Ouranos was castrated by his son Chronos, using a sickle. Hephaestus was lame. Dionysos himself was permanently pissed*.
*Like Socrates.
I guess I should get a pneumonia shot since I’m over 50. I had a tetanus shot almost 6 years ago so maybe not due for that yet.
You should use your results to promote yourself as a wellness guru who doesn’t overshare their privates data with the web. Go on a lecture tour. Prance around a TED stage with an oversized headset.
So, no need to break out the Darth Vader life support suit just yet.
Any Greek god will do. We all get superpowers, right?
You’ve got the body of a 67 years old. Congrats. Where do you keep it? I keep mine in a freezer in the basement.
LOL!
I’m part of a study of the effectiveness of prophylactic radiation treatments to keep small cell lung cancer out of the brain. I got randomized into the group that gets everything except the actual radiation.
Part of it is a cognitive test; and it’s way more interesting than what Trump misremembered, but still nothing to brag about. The part where one remembers words from a list is actually something that I don’t think I do very well (although I’m not allowed to know how I’m doing, which kind of makes sense). It’s not a list of just a handful of words, but more like twenty or so. They give me the same list twice; and then after about half an hour or so of doing other stuff, I get a much longer list and have to say whether a word was in the original list. I guess that, as I approach age 79, my short term memory isn’t as good as I’d like it to be.
The rest of the test I feel, subjectively, like I zoom through it pretty easily.
My hope is that, once the study ends in a couple of years, I’ll be allowed to know whether I’m still thinking straight. 8-)
I fell today while working my part time retirement job at Home Depot. We were moving a toilet bowl from flat cart to a pallet. I grabbed hold of the handle on box, on the count of three the other guy pushed, and I yanked, the handle ripped off and I went flying on my arse. Does that count?
Everybody came rushing over and asked me if I broke my hip.
I too had the “any falls?” question as part of my annual check-up.
I confessed to the three ice related lightweight tumbles.
The high-speed somersault on a local black diamond ski run shall remain a not very secret adventure for a 70 year old idiot!
The wife of a couple that were dear friends and are now long gone used to kid about her husband saying:
‘When we were first married, he was my greek god. But, no he’s just my god damn greek.’
p.s. when you get old, falls are more dangerous. One thing that helps is, to avoid a head/brain injury, learn how to fall and keep you head from hitting the ground. You can practice by standing and then falling while on a bed.
PZ,
We recently got a MMR vaccination. They are recommending it to anyone over 65, even if you’ve had the diseases as a kid, as both my husband and I did. Seems like a good idea, since we plan to do some traveling.
The fall usually doesn’t kill you. It is the post fall consequences on the body and mind that do.