Open carry for the War on Christmas

Michele Fiore sent out a very American Christmas card.


Big ugly guns are so festive, aren’t they? But I hate to break the news to Fiore, but she has made a tactical error and has already lost a moral victory. Look at them. Look at those red shirts. Those plain red shirts. They are insufficiently Jesusy! They remind me of something else.


You will burn forever in atheist hell, Michele Fiore, and I’m scoring another victory in our godless war on Christmas.

I’m also anticipating that next year, to forestall the really silly complaints about their cups that Starbucks has been getting, they’ll just strap a Glock onto their cups (venti sizes only) to satisfy the Christian aesthetic.


  1. Janine the Jackbooted Emotion Queen says

    Meh. I though we all knew that the red shirts are the unimportant characters that can be killed off.

  2. says

    Kinda shoots down the whole “Peace on earth, goodwill to men” theme, doesn’t it? (See what I did there?)

    What I notice is that there is not one depiction of Jesus in this photo. Aren’t these the people trying to put the Christ back in Christmas? What the hell, Christians, what the hell?

  3. madtom1999 says

    Its a cunning ploy to reduce the average intelligence level to ‘open carrier’ by forcing the rest of us to bash our brains out on our desks.

  4. illdoittomorrow says

    Timgueguen at 5: branding and marketing are two of the sacraments of gundamentalism, so I’m not surprised.

  5. komarov says

    Holy Hades!

    “From my family to yours” with that picture attached? Immediately reminded me of the ever so memorable “Ho, Ho, Ho! Now I’ve got a machinegun.” It’s not too hard to interpret that as a threat. It always depends on which neighbour gave it to you, I suppose. If the card came from those folks down the road who never shut up about their militia group and don’t like you too well because you’re insufficiently patriotic, don’t stop to call the cops before leaving town…

    P.S.: That’s a capital No on “responsible gun ownership” and parenting.

  6. says

    I got a little confused for a moment. And then I got really confused.

    At first I thought that the picture is a joke showing the absurdity of “open carry” and I thought it is not very well done, with those people having too waxy grins and looking too artificial.

    Now I am trying to wrap my head around the idea that someone made that family photograph and actually was serious about it. I cannot. That does not compute…

  7. treefrogdundee says

    Not only are those plain red shirts insufficiently Jesusy, they are a clear symbol of support for godless socialism/communism. Why do they hate America so? Off to Gitmo with them!

  8. raven says

    Y’all missed an important point.

    Nevada Lawmaker Says Cancer Is A Fungus, Recommends …thinkprogress. org/health/…/nevada-assemblywoman-cance…ThinkProgress

    Feb 24, 2015 – Nevada Assemblywoman Michele Fiore (R) wants to reform the rules of … soda) can cure cancer as a debunked “persistent cancer myth.” Fiore .

    1. Michele Fiore is a medical expert. She knows that cancer is a fungus and can be cured by…baking soda and apple cider vinegar.

    2. She is an elected asemblyperson in Nevada. In other words, she is one of the brightest people in her district. Which is part of Las Vegas.

  9. magistramarla says

    I fired a salvo in the war on xmas a few days ago.
    I was in a parking lot, struggling to put my purchases into my car while balancing on my canes.
    A big Texas lady with big hair came up to me with one of those plastered on smiles that look more like a sneer and said with a strong Texas drawl “Merry Christmas to you!”
    I smiled and responded “And Happy Holidays to you, too!”
    She snorted, put her nose into the air and stomped off into the store.
    I’m having fun pissing off some of the more self-righteous people that I have to deal with while living in Texas.

  10. F.O. says

    The first question who leaps into my mind is “why would you want to do that!?”
    You need to protect yourselves?
    So, really, USians are proud that they built a society where they need a gun on Christmas.

  11. says

    Responsible gun owners always give a pistol to children. I helps the kids defend themselves against dad killing them when he’s angry. I see no problem here. #helpI’mstuckonplanetwingnuttia

  12. What a Maroon, living up to the 'nym says


    Well, sure. If the UK had the Second Amendment, something like this would never happen:

    A man stabbed three people at an east London tube station Saturday before police subdued him with a stun gun and made an arrest, London’s Metropolitan Police said.

    Police said they were treating the stabbing at Leytonstone station as a terrorist incident.

    One man sustained serious injuries not considered to be life-threatening, police said. Two others suffered minor injuries.

    The only way to stop a bad guy with a knife is a good guy with an assault rifle. And of course the good guys always shoot straight, amirite?

  13. Menyambal - Jabba the Chutzpah says

    That has got to make baby Jesus cry.

    My contribution to the war on Christmas is this: “Merry Christmas” is the wrong thing to say, because “merry” is a party word, and is not suitable for a religious/holy day. New Years Eve is merry, Christmas should be solemn, or triumphant, or happy, or glad. It’s about the birth of a god, not about a party.

    I obviously need a better, shorter way to say that. Maybe “Christmas is a holy day!”

  14. robro says

    I’ve shown this piece to a couple of folks at Starbucks I regularly visit…yes, I have sinned. Anyway, they are duly shocked, but we live in a liberal’s paradise. As I was showing them I noticed a bright red bag of coffee with the label Christmas Blend. I said shouldn’t his be Holiday Blend. Well, they do have a Holiday Blend, and it’s exactly the same beans. The only difference is the label and the bag is blue. Blue may signify something…I’m not sure. There’s also a decaf Christmas Blend in a bright green bag, but no decaf Holiday Blend.

  15. robro says


    “Merry Christmas” is the wrong thing to say, because “merry” is a party word, and is not suitable for a religious/holy day.

    Perhaps I’m wrong, but I’m under the impression that “party” is exactly what the Romans did during the solstice holiday season, at least for much of it and particularly for the rebirth of the solar god. They celebrated a series of cult events starting a month or so before the solstice and running until some weeks after. As Christianity is essentially the amalgam and continuation of the cults practiced around the Roman world, perhaps it’s not surprising.

  16. woozy says

    “It’s up to Americans to protect America”

    Because the true meaning of Christmas is about protecting America.

  17. blf says

    The mildly deranged penguin points out those holsters and so on won’t carry much more than a bites-worth or two of cheese. And the MUSHROOMS! will just leak out and fall to the floor. Useless.

  18. jrkrideau says

    @ 13 Marcus Ranum
    If that family were brown, they’d wind up on a no-fly list.
    Yes, but they could still buy more guns.

    @ 29 Shay
    is this woman out of her mind?
    Yes of course, she is. According to her wiki she wants kids carrying guns on college campuses, believes cancer is a fungus, and, what unfortunately seems to be becoming prima facie evidence of insanity, she is an elected US Republican politician.

    There may be some hope however. Wiki reports, “Fiore is noted for having been the only Republican to vote for lifting the ban on same-sex marriage and the legalization of medical marijuana”.

  19. says

    Michelle Gunfire is more like it. With that cavalier an attitude towards having and using guns, you know an accident is almost inevitable.

    robro (#25) – The white students, no doubt. I suspect black students trying “concealed carry” will be treated a little differently. Yes, Liberty U does have a few.

  20. mamba says

    Gee, I thought the Christmas time was a time of peace and love. They don’t look peaceful or loving to me.

    I’m sure some gun lover will look at this and smile, bullet-pride swelling in their hearts, but seriously, how is a picture like this any different than a picture of some terrorist camp person posing with their weaponry praising the love of Allah or whatever? To me this card says “I’m smiling because I know I’m intimidating you. I don’t care about you as all, but let me show off how tough I think I am with my paranoid family”.

    These are the kind of people who would shoot a caroler if they acted up while singing, not the kind to invite a stranger in for snacks. If you’re gonna pervert the holiday even more than it already is, why even bother?

  21. says

    Meanwhile, Nevada Assemblywoman Michele Fiore says she will fly to Paris and shoot Syrian refugees. Link.

    More from Michele Fiore:

    “I am not OK with Syrian refugees. I’m not OK with terrorists. I’m OK with putting them down, blacking them out, just put a piece of brass in their ocular cavity and end their miserable life. I’m good with that,” she continued.

  22. blf says

    Trigger-happy holidays — the Las Vegas Republican under fire for her family Christmas card:

    [… warning to Santa to be very very careful …]

    Dressed in festive red, standing before a Christmas wreath — for Santa’s bereaved reindeer? — are Fiore’s smiling family, brandishing a terrifying small arsenal of machine guns and semi-automatic pistols. […]

    Fiore, a Republican assemblywoman for Nevada, probably doesn’t share the view that she has shot herself in the foot with her defence on Fox News. “I think getting firearms as a present and giving firearms as presents is a great present, and I think again because Christmas is a family affair, our ultimate responsibility is to protect and make sure our family is safe,” she said.

    Not arming everyone you know to the teeth is, just possibly, perhaps, maybe, safer.

    [… G]uns will define her career. Last month, she greeted the Paris attacks with a tweet to fellow Americans: “Be Aware & Armed, CARRY YOUR GUN.” She later threatened to fly to Paris and shoot Syrian refugees “in the head”. In 2014, she supported a Nevada rancher Clive Bundy in a confrontation with US federal agents. “Don’t come here with guns and expect the American people not to fire back,” she said. She has also lobbied for a bill to allow students to carry concealed weapons on campus.