Your body isn’t yours, it belongs to the conservative Christians

Brace yourselves for a new onslaught of ridiculous Republican anti-woman bills. Alabama is working on bills to declare fetuses ‘persons’ by fiat — they’ll just legally redefine humanity to be a fertilized ovum and all derivatives thereof. They’ll probably get it passed, too.

I suppose if we could get enough dumbass legislators together to declare that vegetables are persons, we’d have to start treating carrots as if they were real people, like laborers and single mothers and college students and Mexicans and all those others the Republicans hold sacred. It won’t make them so, though, not that it makes much difference.

And just to show another tack they’re willing to take, Idaho wants to make all abortions illegal, no exemptions for rape or incest. It doesn’t matter how you got knocked up, lady, you’re having that baby…well, unless you’re the daughter of one of those Republican legislators, in which case you’ll get a ride in daddy’s SUV to that liberal hotbed of sin and perversion, Seattle, where you can get taken care of in a nice clean clinic with caring professionals.

The logic behind this decision is predictable.

“Is not the child of that rape or incest also a victim?” asked Rep. Shannon McMillan, R-Silverton. “It didn’t ask to be here. It was here under violent circumstances perhaps, but that was through no fault of its own.”[…]

The Idaho bill’s House sponsor, state Rep. Brent Crane, R-Nampa, told legislators that the “hand of the Almighty” was at work. “His ways are higher than our ways,” Crane said. “He has the ability to take difficult, tragic, horrific circumstances and then turn them into wonderful examples.”

God is so powerful, he also has the ability to take simple, manageable situations and turn them into tragic, horrific, oppressive circumstances in which the devil’s whores, i.e. all women, can suffer and feel guilt.

By the way, Brent Crane is no more of an authority on this god’s ways than I am, and what he’s really saying is that he can’t think of a rational justification for his evil law, so he’ll just take a shortcut straight to his god the psychopathic joker.