That’s what he says, anyway: he’s put out a desperate call for mo’ money because he is under a “demonically inspired financial attack”. His ministry is facing a $3 million dollar shortfall. Coincidentally, he also had to make a big payout of $3.1 to the family of a two-year-old who was spanked to the point of being covered in welts and abrasions in his church’s daycare.
At last, we have identified the devil. He’s a naughty little boy in Columbus, Ohio.
I’m guessing that Rod Parsley’s been a naughty little boy for a long time.
Sadly there are enough people here to be duped by Pasley’s appeal. They were out in full force when a whack job was burning crosses into a student’s arm during science class…
http://www.dispatch.com/live/content/local_news/stories/2008/06/21/Freshwater_decision.ART_ART_06-21-08_A1_ABAI539.html
Opening paragraph of that story?
When you believe that hurting children to spread your religion is acceptable, you’re a loon. Plain and simple.
See….this is why it’s useful to call out ol’ Oral on his sleazy, lyin’ ways. So that we can identify these weird beggerly habits that the mega-pastors and evangelists insist on pulling. (If they are so damn righteous, why do they need to ask their congregations for money? Shouldn’t God have opened the doors of heaven by now?)
Getting back what the devil stole? You mean, the money ordered lawfully after a legal case? Seriously, sometimes I think these people should be required to take a mental competency test if their grasp of reality is so….filtered. But I know it’s just drama and rhetoric in most cases. “The deeebil, he is out to get me!”
Wonder if the Lord will call him home if he doesn’t meet the deadline?
Well that isn’t transparent at all.
Maybe Oral left him a little something in his will.
Satan cares about the children, god does not.
Got your message, parson.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/mxaa3p
3 dollars and 10 cents doesn’t seem very large to me in terms of injury compensation. Is a multiplier missing?
Meanwhile, wouldn’t the demons have had to get into the minds of the spankers rather than the spankee? There’s no reason to jump to the idea that the boy was the devil. If someone sane, instead of religiously delusional, was confronted by an entity they had credible evidence to suspect was a/the devil, spanking it is hardly an appropriate response.
Jeeze, why are these people always such drama queens? It’s not because of economic factors, oh no, the debbil is out to get him personally, because he’s just that special, just that important.
Riiiight…
What it it about televangelists and their fondness for fancy cufflinks??? Is it like the Pope and his robes & hats?
Hey, they finally have the devil on a felony charge. Stealing $3M is definitely grand larceny. I guess they can put the old Adversary away to do some hard time for that one.
Maybe there is a god, he just got back from a million year vacation and is finally dealing out some justice.
Naw. The devils are the lawyers and judges who think beating a 2 year old kid within an inch of his life is a bad thing requiring legal compensation and damages.
Plus the libruls who think child abuse isn’t a good idea.
It’s so unfair that the devil gets credit for all the bad things that happen to you humans, when it’s really us, that corp of hard working, never-say-die demons who do most of the heavy lifting when it comes to evil.
we live by the motto: “Keep Evil Alive”
Gotta say that with a Jesse Jacksonesque fervor.
Seriously though, Rod Parsley must be demon possessed to make such a ballsy move as begging for 3 million in the front door after paying 3 mill. out the back.
I’m just off now to batter a child black and blue, then I can has my $3 million?
Wait….have I missed the point somewhere?
Louis
Couldn’t happen to a worse guy. The money seems to be drying up – finally – for some of these charlatans. Maybe in part because of the economy, people have decided that dropping money in baskets and hats on Sunday wasn’t producing much tangible return on investment, so they stopped.
Sophist #9
To be fair this is a standard tactic, ministers like to make out that their church’s and the ministers themselves are especially targeted by demons due to them spreading the word of god. This gives them a quite handy get out of jail free card with their followers, because when one of them does something silly or criminal, it was clearly the devil compelling them to do it and are thus blameless.
In short its more con-artistry than pure ego, and it sadly works like a charm.
Legion,
It looks like Parsley is just taking plays out of the Roman Catholic playbook.
“Will you help me take back what the devil stole?” Way to accept responsility.
Is it bad of me that my first thought is that his Church may have to shut down, and therefore reduce the serious traffic problem that his “flock” causes?
Not much sympathy for someone that lives in luxury out of his “sheeple’s” pockets by means of a tax-exempt corporate cult.
For anyone interested, the opinion against Parsley can be found here:
http://vlex.com/vid/faieta-v-world-harvest-church-50594576
Im mildly nausiated.
New woo if anyone is interested
http://www.independent.ie/business/irish/free-energy-machine-on-display-in-dublin-1976136.html
From the linked-to newspaper story:
And just who here has the morality traditionally ascribed to daemons?
Unfortunately, I already gave my money to the secular charities PZ listed earlier. What bad timing!
Little men and their twisted sermons.
The Devil made me do it………..
I just don’t see why these asswipes can’t understand the following simple point: when things are going good for Parsley’s “ministry,” it’s because Gawd is blessing them. When they’re going bad, it’s because the selfsame Gawd is cursing them.
Ah, I think I now understand the difference between Catholic fundies and Protestant fundies:
Catholic: prefer sexual child abuse
Protestant: prefer sadistic child abuse
(oh, wait, forgot about the Magdaline Laundries…never mind…)
If the Devil ever gets tired of his job and chooses to resign I would be interested in taking over his duties in stealing money from televangelists.
Anyone know where one might go to apply for the position?
@28:
You can go straight to hell!
I have a 16 year-old in Austin, TX that would fit that discription!
jobs@goldmansachs.com
Sometimes i seriously wish there would be a hell or heaven and an afterlife.
So many religious leaders would be punished for all the disgusting stuff they did..
but allas.. there is not.. And legal action will need to be suffice.
Hopefully the kid and his family will grow up to be good, happy, wealthy, godless people – and ironically they’d have god to thank! I wish I had $3M – I wonder if I’ll be accepted in one of his daycare centers.
Like O.R. will he meet his maker if he fails to get the 3 mil? Well, someone had to take up that scam.
And just who is going to believe that story…why fundagelicals of courseness!
This is how they get duped by scam artists in the first place.
And no one bats an eyelid, that is why charlatans like this…and ‘Oral Roberts’ are…and were…allowed to get away with the patently absurd not to mention bat shit crazy scams time after time.
Because we must not disrespect religion at any cost…and there you have it!
If you read the decision by the Ohio Supreme Court – thanks to Dave who provided it – you will find that there was a three year old at the school who suffered a fractured skull. Furthermore, the original jury award was closer to six million dollars but state law would not allow that big a judgement.
I’m stopping now. I’m too angry to type anymore.
My comment above should have said “there was another three year old at the school who suffered a fractured skull.” So there were two kids brutalized and not just one.
Even angrier now.
I live about 1/2 mile from his megachurch. I sure hope Satan doesn’t walk that far to get my cash too!
And these people run around demanding that we respect them
andfor their beliefs?Tehol Beddict may associate with demons (or, at least, elder gods), but he isn’t literally a demon himself.
I live near World Harvest Church and would LUV to see it shut down. I can’t drive down the street where the church is located on Sunday mornings without having to wait until all 5000 people in exit the church parking lot, typing up that whole side of town. Parsley is a paraish IMO. As a member of the Patriot Pastors group, he played a part in swaying the 2004 election here in central Ohio through his preaching and literature distribution. Not only that but his World Harvest Church was a polling center. The supervisor of elections (who was running for governor on the GOP ticket at the same time)moved voting machines from precincts in metro Columbus out to Parsley’s church which had a profound influence on the outcome of the election. Over 100 traditional ministers banded together to try to get Parsley’s church tax exmption status taken away because of his political involvment. I am wondering if Parsley stated he needs this money before December 31 means he wrote a hot check, since that is about how long it takes for a check to clear. BTW, this is not the first time Parsley had had problems. He and his father were once investigated for beating a church member in the church parking lot.
Parsley is famous for calling for a xian holy war to destroy Islam.
Just what we need. A war between 2.1 billion xians and 1.4 billion Moslems.
Why is it that xianity is often associated with mass murders and genocide?
The comments at the newspaper site are lively. Probably 90 percent saying the (fill in your own adjective) idiot is getting what he deserves and should have to sell his multiple houses, fleet of vehicles and private jet to pay off the debt. The other 10 percent are saying, essentially, that we just “don’t understand the importance of his mission!” One guy was saying that they shouldn’t beat a 2-year old; but it would be ok if he was 10 instead. Or they’re saying it’s a left-wing conspiracy to take our nation away from god.
Perhaps I read too much bad SF, but that sounds more than a little sinister.
@44 You obviously read the right amount of SF. I had thoughts of the cliched movie Independence Day when reading ‘World Harvest Church.’
Sorry for all the typos in my post. I thought I had edited them out. (blush)
3.1 dollars? what a settlement!
This guy is especially sick. I remember my grandmother watching him before she passed and she ate up every word blindly. I can’t be sure, but I imagine he received quite a lot of her money. I hope he goes bankrupt and is fucking miserable. Looking forward to Jan 1 to see what happens.
And I thought Parsley was the sage of our thyme.
PA #70
It was only one god, and that god was Beddict’s servant.
He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He’s all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can’t handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit!
— George Carlin Politically Incorrect, May 29, 1997
Parsley has toned down his rhetoric in the past few years. Before he would rage daily about the homerseksuel agenda, abortion mills, the ACLU, and the “so-called” separation of church and state. Now his broadcasts show him feeding starving children in the Third World. He always asks for contributions for this ministry. I wonder how much of each dollar contributed goes to feeding anyone but Rod and his family.
fentwin @#49:
No, that would be Rosemary. (Speak of the devil!)
It’s difficult to imagine this coming across any other way than full frontal stupid.
Sven #49;
doh! (thanks :)
Andreas Johansson | December 16, 2009 5:02 PM
Oh, there’s nothing “sinister.” about it. It’s just a casual reference to a large combine harvester … which will run over your bank account if you leave it lying about in the Lord’s field.
Good luck prosecuting the devil for the theft. He’s got all the best lawyers on retainer.
Am I the only one immature enough to read Rod Parsley’s name as a euphemism for pubic hair? Just me? Oh well.
It’s easy for Parsley to get his money. All he has to do is hire the accounting firm “Kent Hovind & Sons– We fuck the IRS, so we can prove humans fucked dinosaurs”.
Disclaimer for Kent Hovind & Sons:
We are not responsible for any punctuation mistakes in numbers or letters.
____________________________________________________
Hovind is vindicated! He reported $400.000, when it was suppose to be $400,000. just an honest punctuation mistake!
It’s not surprising that this is the second instance of child abuse in their daycare (that we know of), as most Christians use the myth of heavenly forgiveness to justify repeatedly acting like assholes.
In other words, “It’s okay for me to act like an f*cktard today, since I’ll be ever so sowwy and repent tonight!”
Further to PatF, the previous injured child (skull fracture, concussion) had the same guy in sole charge of the childcare – the only two days he was in sole charge of the tots, six months apart, and a child significantly injured both times. WHC’s liability was due to negligence (including no serious investigation of either case) and hostile response (threatening the parents, cover-up). WHC actually took an injunction against the family of the injured child to keep them off the premises.
Oh and PZ, inthe post you wrote “$3.1” instead of 3.1 million.
“Need a ride to the fundy fundraiser tonight? I’ll be there in 20 minutes.”
“Why don’t you Gimme 45? I gotta shave my Rod Parsley…you know, in case I get some Oral tonight.”
DAMN!!! Looks like Phil beat me to the obvious 13 yr. old joke. Well, what’s done is done.
IF prayer really worked …. Parsley and Robertson, and Dollar, and Copeland, and Haggard and Meyer (Joyce) and all the rest of the species of Evangelicus Scumsuckus would be extinct.
Whats the difference between a catfish and an evangelist?
.
.
.
.
.
One is a bottom dwelling, mudsucking low-life parasite and the other is a good tasting fish.
(…lame humor attempt ….)
Steve
Legion writes:
Rod Parsley must be demon possessed to make such a ballsy move as begging for 3 million in the front door after paying 3 mill. out the back.
Yeah, really. He forgot to factor in operating expenses. He should be fleecing his sheep for $4 million.
It must be nice to have no pride.
Parsley and the guy that beat those kids got off lucky. I know more than a few fathers (and a couple of mothers) that would’ve beaten them within an inch of their lives and then put two in their heads to finish the job. They should be thankful they only need to run their con a little longer to make up the $3.1 million.
Holy Crap, Batman.
http://www.beastprophets.com/
And let us not forget that good ol’ John McCain named Rod as his “spiritual adviser” in his doomed presidential campaign last year. Now was that before or after the Wise Old Warrior picked Caribou Wolfshooter as his Veep? Jesusfuckingchrist. The Democrats in congress may be spineless pussies, but the Republicans are just off-this-planet freaks!
Way to go devil!
And God Shall Provide.
He’s not the messiah, he’s a very naughty boy!
I went to Parsley’s church when i had the misfortune of living in Ohio for a couple of years. I’ve never met more cruel people in my life, especially among the “Christians” there, which is saying a huge amount because even people in my family and close friends have done the most betraying and most heinous things you could ever imagine… and spanking a child like that is inexcusable, especially in such a “christian” daycare. *spew*
…because one isn’t enough to describe the stupidity.
The sad thing is that he’ll still probably get a ton of money (maybe all of it) from his followers.
Personal experience regarding this tidbit: right location, wrong person, and the devil is GREAT in bed.
Thanks Dave @20 for the link. Before reading that, I thought, “3 million in damages – these juries just award ridiculously large sums.”
After reading that, the poor child’s family deserved every cent, and WHM deserve to pay. Vile attempts at cover-up, not the least concern for the safety of the children in their care. I can only hope that the other parents learned from this experience.
It’s kinda appropriate that all of them should contribute to paying the fine.
Oh, I hope his fraudulent bullshit “ministry” goes under. Also, if his imaginary sky friend is so fuckin’ powerful, why does Parsley need *my* money?
OTOH, I’m wondering why all the outcry about the, albeit severe, physical injuries. Think of all the other kids getting their minds and lives poisoned.
Okay, let me see if I’ve got this right: God told them to beat a couple of little kids and leave them with broken bones or bloody welts, and then the Devil then instigated an expensive lawsuit to discourage them from beating up any more children?
What do these people do when the spirit REALLY moves them? Back cement trucks over their grandparents? Launch flamethrower attacks at tricycle-riding preschoolers? Put puppies on the rack?
‘ This afternoon, in a second statement, the church said, “We continue to pray for the Faietas and acknowledge that this experience has been difficult for them as well.” ‘
Oh, well at least they acknowledge how difficult it was for the family.
I bet the family is being ostricized by their friends and made out to be greedy parasites.
Reminds me of the first “Amityville” movie, when a roll of banknotes disappear and it’s implied that the devil stole it. Boy, was that silly…
But won’t the devil just take the money again? It’s not like anythings changed. He’s still an asshole.
Surely they will just be giving money to the devil over and over again.
Unless thats the plan….
I wonder if there are any warning signs outside the day-care centre (other than the fact of it being religious at all!), like this one (which, depending on how you read it, resembles “abandon hope all ye who enter here”).
The comments on the Columbus newspaper website are running at least 10-1 against Parsley and his “church.” That’s a bit encouraging, at least.
If what Parsley says is true, then it seems to me that in this case the Devil is actually an avenging angel.
http://www.dispatch.com/live/content/local_news/stories/2009/01/11/faieta.ART_ART_01-11-09_B1_A8CGK0Q.html
From the above story about the case:
“The Children Services caseworker assigned to the case was a long-standing member of the church and did not excuse herself from the investigation. One expert on child abuse surmised from her report that the marks on the boy could have been a rash, but he recanted that testimony during the trial after seeing photos of the bruising.”
I wonder how many other cases of child abuse by church members this woman has tried to cover up.
The faithful gathered around Jesus, there on the Mount of Olives. For many years, I wondered why he chose to begin His teaching with the words, “Take heed that no man decieve you.” As a student of Scripture and a follower of Christ, the reason is abundantly clear. He knew that until the end of time, there would be men laying hold of His name and amassing fortunes under the guise of spreding the Gospel.
Blue Kentucky Girl