Sunday morning eruption of evil

The Nielsen Haydens filled my morning with horror, so I’m going to make you suffer, too. Behold, a Danish disco band pretending to be Apaches:

It goes on for an interminable 4½ minutes; seriously, you’ve done your penance if you watch 20 seconds, long enough to spot the sequins and the Groucho mustache on the keyboardist. I recommend you turn it off before the Apache maidens emerge from behind the teepee—that was just too much.

Say, that Making Light thread led me to another cheesy video by Army of Lovers, and since I was soliciting suggestions for a menacing makeover, it gave me an idea: eyeliner and frilly shirts. A busty henchperson with exposed cleavage might also help.


  1. Thony C. says

    “I now think I know what it feels like to have a bad acid trip.”

    No bad acid trip was ever THAT bad!

  2. Bill says

    Awesome!! It’s the theme music they use for “Wild Chicago”! A public television program about out of the way corners and unusual people in the Chicago area hosted by local improv comics. (Though the new hosts aren’t nearly as funny as the ones from the 90’s.)

  3. Bill says

    Oops. Correction: I see this is the “disco version”. “Wild Chicago” uses the original version of Apache.

  4. says

    Indian maidens? I thought they were roaring 20’s flappers. The costumes look like leftovers from some cheezy 70s porn flick.
    The best part is where the guy spends a good 40 seconds singing to the girls with his back to the camera ha ha haa!

  5. emkay says

    PZ, I’m thinking that looks like you in your younger days on those bongos….is this a blast from your past? BTW, I made it thru the entire thing…pirate-like voiceover at the end and all! Too funny!

  6. Dianne says

    Thank you. I feel like I just looked at the Necronomicon. There are no words to describe the horror…of cheesy videos.

  7. Davis says

    I watched the whole thing, too. It’s mesmerizing, like “Plan 9 From Outer Space” (or a Pam Atlas vlog).

  8. False Prophet says

    It should be a capital crime to use a Les Paul in the service of such an atrocity. And I didn’t get a good look at the bass, but it had better not be a Rickenbacker!

  9. David Marjanović says

    Quote from the news magazine profil:

    The 1970s — an epoch marked by brutal ugliness — […]

    So glad I was born no sooner than 1982. And didn’t watch the video.

  10. David Marjanović says

    Quote from the news magazine profil:

    The 1970s — an epoch marked by brutal ugliness — […]

    So glad I was born no sooner than 1982. And didn’t watch the video.

  11. Mrs Tilton says

    I think you’re missing then point about the Army of Lovers video. It’s cheesy, of course; but sort of tongue-in-cheesy. And you’re definitely missing the point about the busty henchbabe. She’s sexy and good-looking, but much more importantly, she’s very, very funny.

  12. Beersport says

    This is why the islamists HATE the West. Not our porn filled entertainment, not “freedoms” and not our hate of their religion. This video is an affront to humanity. It is so bad Osama bin Laden said “All praise to Allah, this video makes David Hasselhoff’s “Hooked On A Feeling” look like the work of a genius. Death to the infidels.”

  13. says

    Hey, I thought that rocked! It took me back to the days before techno, house, industrial and superstar scratcher dj’s took over the music on the dancefloor. And for more fun, check out Boney-M and their Russian gig. If you really want to look cool, PZ, get a dead ermine to drape over your shoulders:

  14. Rich says

    “”I believe Apache was a Shadows tune originally”



    “Apache” was a popular instrumental song written by Jerry Lordan and recorded by British group The Shadows in June 1960. It was released two months later. The song topped the UK singles chart for five weeks. It has since been covered many times. The record is considered influential, both in its time and in following years.

    “Cover versions
    Early British guitarist Bert Weedon also recorded “Apache” in 1960; it made it to number 24 on the charts. ”

  15. says

    You people are nuts. The Danish Apache flappers were hot. I’m calling my buddies and we’re going to meet in the garage to start a band, just so we can call ourselves The Danish Apache Flappers.

  16. JamesR says

    That is like some overly cheesed spaghetti western theme song. Where’s Squint Eastrood?