Those sneaky forms of academic bias… »« Biology is a hard problem

Comments

  1. kevinalexander says

    As WC Fields said ‘I never drink water. Fish fuck in it’
    These six fish were just thinking about it or the bolts would be closer together.
    Unless there were twelve fish involved, or more, or maybe they were the same secks and wanted to get married.

  2. sqlrob says

    OK, so go slightly serious, what would happen to fish where these things hit?

    Cars are safe because they’re metal and it gets conducted around. Does the current here dissipate at the surface, spreading out? How deep does something have to be to have a reasonable chance of surviving?

  3. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Given the erratic aim of deities, weren’t those six fish in another ocean?

  4. twas brillig (stevem) says

    <whispering to self>Where, & when, was this photo taken? Was it timelapse of several strikes, or a single strike of six bolts simultaneous?</whispering>
    Odin has such poor aim with his lighnin bolts, I bet the targets were on the beach and the poor fishes were “collateral damage”. ;-(
    Awesome pic, regardless. ;-)

  5. Nick Gotts says

    Maybe they committed a mortal fin. – robinjohnson

    Or they were weighed in the scales and found wanted.

  6. says

    These six fish were just thinking about it or the bolts would be closer together.
    Unless there were twelve fish involved, or more, or maybe they were the same secks and wanted to get married.

    The others have now been schooled.

  7. says

    You’re all wrong. It wasn’t God smiting fish. He was smiting yet more of those evil children commandos trying to sneak into his favoured nation. You know, just like those ones the right wingers are currently so upset about, because they’re going to help Obama get elected to a third term and give everyone Butts Disease.

  8. Owlmirror says

    Shouldn’t the title be “Behold the Wrath of Cod”?

    /floundering around

  9. Snoof says

    Hey, everyone, what’s going on-

    *looks around, sees the incipient punstorm*

    I’ll just let myself trout.

  10. Louis says

    I love a pun cascade. I’m gurnard into this one. Although, I do admit this issue cod be divisive. Salmon one side of the issue, salmon the other. It can be a hard roe to hoe. Some people milt into the background, others are like rays.

    Louis

  11. Randomfactor says

    You’ve got the wrong god and the wrong vector.

    The valiant Ghotibusters prepare to save us from Grouper the Grouparian all by crossing the Gulf Streams.

    (Remember, if someone asks you if you’re a cod, you’re a cod!)

  12. Louis says

    Okay Randomfactor, you’ve have just won every internet I can ship to you in a reasonable time frame.

    Louis

  13. DrewN says

    Give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day.
    Teach a man to fish, he’ll eat for a lifetime.
    Teach a man to pray, he’ll starve to death waiting for this to happen.

  14. Sili says

    Odin has such poor aim with his lighnin bolts, I bet the targets were on the beach and the poor fishes were “collateral damage”. ;-(

    Thor.

  15. Sili says

    The valiant Ghotibusters prepare to save us from Grouper the Grouparian all by crossing the Gulf Streams.

    You ought to have worked a “There is no Danio” in there.

  16. Amphiox says

    re #33;

    That’s probably why the aim was so bad. Thor would have HIT his targets. Odin was just borrowing the lightning bolts (as King of the Gods, he has that prerogative). But not only does he lack practice, he has no depth perception, having given up one eye in exchange for wisdom about something or another a long time ago….

  17. Crimson Clupeidae says

    Since I can’t find a way to work my name into this (great) list of puns, I’m just going to leave this here. Best fish related song evar (even better than Fish-Heads!).

    Wet Dream

  18. Olav says

    Twas brillig (stevem) #6:

    Where, & when, was this photo taken? Was it timelapse of several strikes, or a single strike of six bolts simultaneous?

    It is a single, long exposure registering several consecutive bolts.

  19. says

    You evil bastard. Have you ever tried to laugh your balls off with a couple of cracked ribs? Ouch! Think I almost dislodged a kidney as well.

  20. Al Dente says

    You’re all assuming those lightning bolts had a porpoise. God might have done it for the halibut. You’re supposed to be skeptics, not falling hook, line and sinker for any crappy old clam which comes down the pike.

  21. JohnnieCanuck says

    SQL Rob @3

    Electrofishing relies on inducing a current between electrodes in the water. For the right level of current, the fish will be temporarily stunned and rise to the surface Sometimes pulsed DC current is used to cause muscle contractions (galvanotaxis) that force the fish to swim towards the anode.

    Fisheries biologists use it to survey fish populations. I have seen the result of inexperienced operators cranking the current too high. The muscle contraction is so strong that it breaks the spine. Not good when it is an endangered species to start with.

    I would expect that there would be a dead zone surrounding each strike and a stun zone beyond that. How big and how deep would depend on things like salinity.

  22. cicely says

    sqlrob:

    OK, so go slightly serious, what would happen to fish where these things hit?

    For AD&D porpoises purposes, a Lightning Bolt cast on the water has a hemispherical area-of-effect as if it were a Fireball of the same level, and for the same damage (with the radius defined as where the stroke contacts the water, and propagating below the surface); whereas a Lightning Bolt cast under the water has a spherical area-of-effect as if it were a Fireball of the same level and for the same damage, but centered on the caster. Underwater casting also involves something along the lines of an Airy Water or Water Breathing spell or device.
     
    Clearly, rather more than 6 fish were completely fucked, unless they had some gawdawful hit points, and/or electrical resistance, and/or a natural twenty on their saving throws.
     
    Some sort of Divine Favor wouldn’t hurt, either. Poseidon’s, say.
    -