Jun 09 2012

Anti-Caturday Post

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My efforts to undermine the cat hegemony with much more interesting creatures with spines, slime, and fangs has not made much headway. I must change my tactics. Therefore, taking a cue from some of the comments here, I am deploying the latest weapon in the war on felinity: cuteness. You will not be able to resist.

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54 comments

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1

adamcolley

9 June 2012 at 7:54 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

That is indeed cute -.o

Rats might be cute enough but they still don’t beat kittens!
2

madscientist

9 June 2012 at 8:20 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Hmmm … how does catfood make headway?
3

guardianeighty

9 June 2012 at 8:30 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Aww, they’re like little kitties! <3
4

laurentweppe

9 June 2012 at 8:31 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Oh many times will I have to say this: the only way to fight the perfidious Cat collective is with puppies.

But your in your anti-dogist bullheadedness, you refused to convert and give They Who Give Us Puppies their due worship.

Your failure is the price for your sins Paul Zachary! Repent and become a good Canis-ian: only then will your struggle against the Cat heretics will bear fruit, So barketh the Great Slobering Mutt in the Sky.
5

Improbable Joe

9 June 2012 at 8:36 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

I used to have baby rats. They are better than baby cats. :)
6

magistramarla

9 June 2012 at 8:47 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

It’s a step in the right direction. Baby rats are cute because they are soft and furry and look much like kittens – who are the epitome of cute.
7

morsgotha

9 June 2012 at 8:49 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

I dont get it, hows is showing Noms anticaturday?
8

mattand

9 June 2012 at 9:07 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

But your in your anti-dogist bullheadedness, you refused to convert and give They Who Give Us Puppies their due worship.

Oh.

My.

Dog.

I can not unsee that.

You can practically smell the black velvet.
9

Crip Dyke, MQ, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden

9 June 2012 at 9:13 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Caine is going to love this. Although I think Havelock & Sam were quite a bit older than this when she brought them home, the first exploration of the home is always quite amusing. My best friend’s other best friend has had rats for a long time. She was always a bit ecstatic watching her ratties explore her home for the first time.
10

jasonmcdonald

9 June 2012 at 9:21 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Here’s hoping this is the control group.
11

Ava, Oporornis maledetta

9 June 2012 at 10:16 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

The baby rats don’t do it for me, PZ, but if you want to disarm the kitty cuteness, check out:
http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/cgi-bin/seigmiaow.pl
12

Rumtopf

9 June 2012 at 10:24 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

:D *squeee*
Look at the tiny ratlings, waddling about on their silly massive feet. Awww they’re grooming the owner’s hand! Me wants them, precious.
13

stubby

9 June 2012 at 10:28 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Lol @ kitlers. That is fantastic.
14

Glen Davidson

9 June 2012 at 10:32 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

The very best reason to have cats, I dare say.

Glen Davidson
15

jand

9 June 2012 at 11:51 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

ava @ 11 cats that look like hitler

this must be a new world record, you’ve Godwined a thread about kittens and baby rats! :)
16

Brownian

10 June 2012 at 12:18 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Rats might be cute enough but they still don’t beat kittens!

Hmm, rats aren’t even listed.
17

harbo

10 June 2012 at 12:32 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

My carpet snake has taken a new interest in the laptop.
18

madbull

10 June 2012 at 12:42 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

War on felinity ? Really PZ do you want to battle a lion ?
19

madtom1999

10 June 2012 at 1:36 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

For absolute cute on their first day out you cant beat hedgehogs. Their back legs are, for some reason, too long and they crash about in a most endearing way.
And eat cat food.
20

StevoR

10 June 2012 at 2:22 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

My efforts to undermine the cat hegemony with much more interesting creatures with spines, slime, and fangs has not made much headway.

Cats have fangs!

Esecially the saber toothed tiger (smilodon) variety.

But also domestic moggies too.
21

blindrobin

10 June 2012 at 4:03 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Vermin!!! Quick get a couple of serpents.
22

theophontes (坏蛋)

10 June 2012 at 4:03 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

@ PZ

I’ll see your “cute” and raise you cute^n! …
(Allan Sherman adds the lyrics to your tune):

WARNING: Be sure to wear your solar glasses from the Venus transition. You might be blinded by the cute.

FINAL WARNING: Contains ponies, baby dragons and shit … you have been warned..!!!

.
.
Last chance to back out now….

.
.
.

OK, You asked for it: Link to Ubercute.
23

'Tis Himself

10 June 2012 at 4:44 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

This is cute!
24

Sili

10 June 2012 at 5:35 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Ewwwwww, vertebrates.
25

puppygod

10 June 2012 at 5:51 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

@4 laurentweppe

But your in your anti-dogist bullheadedness, you refused to convert and give They Who Give Us Puppies their due worship.

Uh, is that thing on? Ahem. I just wanted to clearly state that I have absolutely nothing to with that strange cult you promote, and I refuse to accept any worship. (I do accept cookies, though, if you insist).

Also, I like cats. And rats. And actually think that ratsies are among cutest animals on this planet – somewhere between waterbears and red pandas on cuteness scale.
26

Tony

10 June 2012 at 6:10 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

PZ:

Therefore, taking a cue from some of the comments here, I am deploying the latest weapon in the war on felinity: cuteness. You will not be able to resist.

I have to hand it to you, that was pretty darned cute (who knew Pinky and the Brain had so many relatives), but pales in comparison to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZGVt8sJmNs

‘Tis @23:

Though it is cute, I’m sorry to say it does not top the cuteness of wuvable, huggable, widdle kittens (or bunnies. “It must be bunnies!”)
27

Tony

10 June 2012 at 6:23 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

War on felinity ? Really PZ do you want to battle a lion ?

Please.
Do you really think PZ would sully his hands by battling a lion?
That’s why he has ::minions::
Round 1: Horde vs Kitty Galore’s Cat-Astrophic Felines

FIGHT!
28

Tony

10 June 2012 at 6:25 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Glen:

The very best reason to have cats, I dare say.

I thought the best reason to have cats was to rid homes of the scourge of roaches, waterbugs, silverfish and all their ilk.
29

Tony

10 June 2012 at 6:29 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

puppygod:

(I do accept cookies, though, if you insist).

Cheese, peanut butter* or charcoal cookies?
30

bjorndoolaeghe

10 June 2012 at 8:45 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Ooh fresh cat food.

So okay, granted, little ratsies are cutesies. No matter, they’re still fresh Nom.
31

jerrycoyne

10 June 2012 at 9:07 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

You can’t win this one, P.Z. Ceiling Cat will give you the grace to accept the things you cannot change.
32

Ava, Oporornis maledetta

10 June 2012 at 9:27 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

#15, Jand:

Yikes, I didn’t mean to!

#20, StevoR: Cats have spines in their own way. So PZ loses on that one also.

#22, Theophontes: Yay to the Allan Sherman reference.
33

puppygod

10 June 2012 at 9:38 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Cheese, peanut butter* or charcoal cookies?

Whatever have most calories. I’m not fussy eater.
34

Ava, Oporornis maledetta

10 June 2012 at 9:38 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Theophontes, your warnings were not strong enough . . . lethally cute . . . gotta lie down now . . .
35

Bob Dowling

10 June 2012 at 9:47 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Cat food? Only if the snakes don’t get to them first.
36

Audley Z Darkheart (liar and scoundrel)

10 June 2012 at 9:53 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Ratties!

/pointing out the obvious
37

julietdefarge

10 June 2012 at 9:59 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

That’s ONE litter?!?
But yes, they are cute, smart, and I’ve noticed that my friend’ pet rats don’t actually like getting dirty. She tells me that the ones you get in pet stores are dumbed down due to growing up in non-stimulating environments and may even be mentally ill, making them biters. I dunno.

Best rat video ever- rats swarming the inside of a KFC:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=su0U37w2tws
38

SC (Salty Current), OM

10 June 2012 at 10:15 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Lambs.
39

Audley Z Darkheart (liar and scoundrel)

10 June 2012 at 10:30 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

You know what’s cuter than kittens and baby rats (also called kittens)? Baby turtles!
40

Trebuchet

10 June 2012 at 10:46 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Lambs in the house? What next? And that German Shepherd was not doing its job!
41

theophontes (坏蛋)

10 June 2012 at 10:48 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

@ Ava

Too cute? Here an antidote: Puss-in-boots. (Rattie fans, click lightly.)
42

theophontes (坏蛋)

10 June 2012 at 10:54 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

@ Audley

Awwwwwww….

Chinese Turtle-dragons are pretty common here. You picture reminds me of one (two!) for some reason. Example.
43

Audley Z Darkheart (liar and scoundrel)

10 June 2012 at 10:59 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

theophontes:

You picture reminds me of one (two!) for some reason. Example.

That is so awesome. :)
44

The Rat King

10 June 2012 at 1:43 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

We’re already the masters of this planet; we don’t need your approval.

Ineradicable, unstoppable.

Everything you build is new shelter for thousands of us, every scrap you throw away; a banquet.

When you wipe yourselves out, we’ll be the ones gnawing on your bones. When nothing else can move on, the RAT will take over. It happened once before, it will happen again.

Order another meal that you can’t finish, you glorified monkeys. We’ll be waiting to receive what your bloated self cannot finish.
45

arctic

10 June 2012 at 9:20 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

PZ embracing fuzzy cuteness.

The Incredible Hulk in pink pyjamas.

The Alien Holiday Special.
46

Tony

10 June 2012 at 10:10 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

bjorndoolaeghe

Ooh fresh cat food.

So okay, granted, little ratsies are cutesies. No matter, they’re still fresh Nom.

Yes, extra Nom Nom if they’re scattered, smothered and chunked (diced and topped lack a certain visual appeal…)
aaaaaand I just realized that some people reading this may not be aware of WAFFLE HOUSE. It’s a 24-hour restaurant(I’m only aware of them in the southeast U.S. but they’re probably all over the U.S. to varying degrees) that largely sells breakfast foods (my typical meal is the All Star Special: scrambled eggs, grits, toast, bacon and a waffle). The Nom Nom above refers to the various ways they serve hash browns:
Scattered (literally scattered on a flat top grille…or is that a salamander?)
Smothered (covered in sauteed onions)
Covered (cheese on top)
Chunked (ham is added)
Diced (tomatoes)
Peppered (jalapeno peppers)
Capped (‘shrooms)
Topped (their signature chili)
Country (gravy is added)
The food they serve is southern style food and I’m not certain if there’s any nutrition to be found in any of their offerings…but at 3:45 in the morning after drinking for the last 4 hours, anything shy of cute rats tend to sound appealing.
47

bjarndoolaeghe

10 June 2012 at 10:10 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Rat King: Read that Norman Spinrad novel did you?
48

Tony

10 June 2012 at 10:12 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Sorry, the rats ate the cheese and the blue creature with big eyes ate the cookie. Peanut Butter it is! On the roof of your mouth (I have *never* done that to my dog…)
49

Tony

10 June 2012 at 10:21 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Rat King:

We’re already the masters of this planet; we don’t need your approval.

I hate to break this to you, but cats took over the mantle of rulers of the Earth a few eons ago.
I just remembered that I’ve met a few people who refer to cats as “rats with tails*”. Make of that what you will.

*yes, I know that doesn’t make any sense. Everyone knows rats have tails. They taste great when dipped in chocolate, frozen and used as a garnish in a Chocolate Martini.
50

puppygod

11 June 2012 at 3:33 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

@37 julietdefarge

That’s ONE litter?!?
But yes, they are cute, smart, and I’ve noticed that my friend’ pet rats don’t actually like getting dirty. She tells me that the ones you get in pet stores are dumbed down due to growing up in non-stimulating environments and may even be mentally ill, making them biters. I dunno.

Well, the pet rats are somewhat inbred, though not so much as main strains of lab rats. Still, more than hundred years of breeding for sociability and looks (and not for intelligence) make them somewhat dumber. Not so stupid as wistars, mind you, but not exactly what you call smart.

Now, wild stock brown Norway rats are badass by comparison. They are cunning and aggressive and I have scars to prove it. By contrast, I’ve never been bitten by any of pet rats of my friends or by any of the hundreds of wistars I have handled. I mean they sometimes did catch my finger or ear with their teeth, but it was either playful or warning – pinch at best and never hard enough to break the skin. BNs goes for the artery.

Though biting have more to do with proper handling than genetics – rats should be trained to get accustomed to humans when they are couple of weeks old. One of the best jobs I had during college years was petting a batch of hundred of young female wistars – you took one, petted it for couple of minutes, and then took another and so on for couple of hours day by day. That way when time has come for behavioural experiments they though nothing about being handled by humans. Ah, now that was cuddliness overload.
51

julietdefarge

11 June 2012 at 8:49 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

@Puppygod. Thanks for drawing a clear line between wild and ‘designer’ rats. And I’m still boggled by the fecundity.
52

The Rat King

11 June 2012 at 10:39 am (UTC -5) Link to this comment

@Tony
I hate to break this to you, but cats took over the mantle of rulers of the Earth a few eons ago.
I just remembered that I’ve met a few people who refer to cats as “rats with tails*”. Make of that what you will.

No; we’ve let them be worshiped by you lot because cats are predictable, lazy and useful; they appeal to your weak human senses, though there are still some hold-outs of the human race that do not treat them the way we would like.

New Zealand and Australia for instance; they are shot and killed on sight.

But they’ll give in eventually and install our puppets in every home…

By the way; do you know why cats don’t go into the sewers of places like New York? Natural selection; the ones dumb or brave enough to do it were weeded out of the gene pool.
53

geocatherder

11 June 2012 at 9:06 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

A belated *SQUEEE!* But my fondness for rats goes waaaay back; a dorm-mate had a pet rat my Sophomore year of college (C.E. 1974) and I grew to appreciate the little critters. Then my then-boyfriend tended rats at a biology lab (C.E. 1976) and I got ever more impressed by the little critters. Boyfriend wasn’t so impressed; he’d grabbed an escaping rat by the tail, and the rat, quite understandably, turned around and bit him HARD. No love lost between those two… Finally, the Senior Engineer I Most Admired during my first job stint kept pet rats. Bill was the kind of software guru who could load extraordinarily complex software on the system and go home… because Bill’s stuff Always Worked The First Time. I soooo admired him… who, in that situation, couldn’t admire his rats, also?
54

geocatherder

11 June 2012 at 9:08 pm (UTC -5) Link to this comment

Oh, but I have to admit where my heart lies: with the two rescue cats who run my life.