Quantcast

«

»

Dec 11 2009

Now I know why I liked Pokemon so much

Because it’s Satanic! Duh!

I loved how when he starts talking about Satan they show a picture of Jigglypuff. Yes, the embodiment of pure evil.

I wonder what this preacher would think once he saw James’s frequent cross dressing…

36 comments

Skip to comment form

  1. 1
    Joé McKen

    Oh lord, I couldn’t even endure all that. Way too long for what it’s worth.

    But, indeed, thinking about Jigglypuff does elicit the same reaction in me as whenever I think about Satan and Hell and sin and how we’re all doomed to everlasting fire …

    Sleep, that is.

  2. 2
    Joé McKen

    Oh lord, I couldn’t even endure all that. Way too long for what it’s worth.But, indeed, thinking about Jigglypuff does elicit the same reaction in me as whenever I think about Satan and Hell and sin and how we’re all doomed to everlasting fire …Sleep, that is.

  3. 3
    The Big Blue Frog

    GMAFB, this is why even my wife, a born-again Christian, refuses to go to church.

    Monopoly is from Satan, because it teaches kids that every time they pass GO, they get $200. There are people out there who refuse to follow Christ, because they're holding out for Boardwalk and Park Place.

  4. 4
    The Big Blue Frog

    GMAFB, this is why even my wife, a born-again Christian, refuses to go to church.Monopoly is from Satan, because it teaches kids that every time they pass GO, they get $200. There are people out there who refuse to follow Christ, because they’re holding out for Boardwalk and Park Place.

  5. 5
    hellkat9940

    No, no, no! The term Pokemon Master is obviously used denote control ofthe white playr character over the differently colred, sentent, ye subhuman masses. The world of Pokemon clearly shows that the property owners utilize pokemon to aid their businesses.

    Abilties are not granted through magic, but by strange quriks of their obvious subuman and inferor biology.

    Why, it's perfectly possible for a 12 year old in the Pokemon world to capture the creator deity being of the Pokemon and keep them in their pocket.

    The game is obviously a metahor for proper Christian life, as the Bible instructs us on how to keep our slaves. So instead of condemning the use of Flamethrower, Quick Attack, and Hyper Beam as satanic magic, we should instead be having our pet negros fighting to the death so they can level up and learn abilities beyond *Pleasure White Woman*.

    Please note that the above is complete and utter sattire.

  6. 6
    hellkat9940

    No, no, no! The term Pokemon Master is obviously used denote control ofthe white playr character over the differently colred, sentent, ye subhuman masses. The world of Pokemon clearly shows that the property owners utilize pokemon to aid their businesses.Abilties are not granted through magic, but by strange quriks of their obvious subuman and inferor biology.Why, it’s perfectly possible for a 12 year old in the Pokemon world to capture the creator deity being of the Pokemon and keep them in their pocket.The game is obviously a metahor for proper Christian life, as the Bible instructs us on how to keep our slaves. So instead of condemning the use of Flamethrower, Quick Attack, and Hyper Beam as satanic magic, we should instead be having our pet negros fighting to the death so they can level up and learn abilities beyond *Pleasure White Woman*.Please note that the above is complete and utter sattire.

  7. 7
    Somero

    ^ Pokemon takes place in an analog of Japan. The kids are asian.

  8. 8
    Somero

    ^ Pokemon takes place in an analog of Japan. The kids are asian.

  9. 9
    Ivan

    @ 1:21 :

    Girl, nodding and thinking: Hallelujah, amen, praise Jeezus!

    Guy, frowning and sighing, thinking: I can't believe I have to sit through an hour of this bullshit every Sunday just to get in this girl's pants.

  10. 10
    Ivan

    @ 1:21 :Girl, nodding and thinking: Hallelujah, amen, praise Jeezus!Guy, frowning and sighing, thinking: I can’t believe I have to sit through an hour of this bullshit every Sunday just to get in this girl’s pants.

  11. 11
    Ivan

    @ 2:28 :

    "But they're so into this make-believe world that they can't distinguish between fantasy and reality."

    Irony levels approaching critical. RUN!

  12. 12
    Ivan

    @ 2:28 :”But they’re so into this make-believe world that they can’t distinguish between fantasy and reality.”Irony levels approaching critical. RUN!

  13. 13
    Veritas

    Wait wait wait…so this Boulder Badge just means I am…satanic?

  14. 14
    Veritas

    Wait wait wait…so this Boulder Badge just means I am…satanic?

  15. 15
    Anonymous

    Jigglypuff is evil, or "sleep" was anyway. He was always a pain in the ass he catch back in red/blue. lol

  16. 16
    Anonymous

    Jigglypuff is evil, or “sleep” was anyway. He was always a pain in the ass he catch back in red/blue. lol

  17. 17
    Egoist Paul

    I am always amused by a video like this, which shows a typical moronic preacher that uses redneck logic mixed with Christianity, makes an argument against something fun, and turn it into something evil which everyone should avoid. An attempt like this can be successful only if the audience are uneducated and illogical and are usually located in the Bible Belt.

    This video is added to two of my collections: 1.stupid religious people jokes 2.redneck logic jokes.

  18. 18
    Egoist Paul

    I am always amused by a video like this, which shows a typical moronic preacher that uses redneck logic mixed with Christianity, makes an argument against something fun, and turn it into something evil which everyone should avoid. An attempt like this can be successful only if the audience are uneducated and illogical and are usually located in the Bible Belt.This video is added to two of my collections: 1.stupid religious people jokes 2.redneck logic jokes.

  19. 19
    Hugo Grinebiter

    I saw a lot of this kind of thing when I was a nutter. I'll cover it in my own blog, upcoming subchapter "Religion as social status tech", next year. Because that's what it is: a status game. If I can find demons in something you consider harmless, I win and you lose brownie points. The dynamic is very like detection of counterrevolutionary tendencies in a Communist Party meeting in the days of Stalin: self-defence is a really bad idea, survival lies in outcompeting the last speaker in zeal. That girl nodding sagely is thinking of how she's going to have that sister-in-the-Lawd who bakes better cookies sent to Siberia (= being given Ministry) for excessive Pokemon tolerance.

    Do note that this directly contradicts what Paul says, that the "strong" Christian is the one who isn't bothered by trivial doings of his neighbours, while the "weak" one fears that he will lose his mojo if he hangs out with them.

  20. 20
    Hugo Grinebiter

    I saw a lot of this kind of thing when I was a nutter. I’ll cover it in my own blog, upcoming subchapter “Religion as social status tech”, next year. Because that’s what it is: a status game. If I can find demons in something you consider harmless, I win and you lose brownie points. The dynamic is very like detection of counterrevolutionary tendencies in a Communist Party meeting in the days of Stalin: self-defence is a really bad idea, survival lies in outcompeting the last speaker in zeal. That girl nodding sagely is thinking of how she’s going to have that sister-in-the-Lawd who bakes better cookies sent to Siberia (= being given Ministry) for excessive Pokemon tolerance. Do note that this directly contradicts what Paul says, that the “strong” Christian is the one who isn’t bothered by trivial doings of his neighbours, while the “weak” one fears that he will lose his mojo if he hangs out with them.

  21. 21
    Anonymous

    Thanks for that last bit Hugo, didn't know it and it is an interesting thought.

    While I've not felt tempted to play with pokemon it was due to lack of interest rather than stupid excuses/paranoia.

    pplr

  22. 22
    Anonymous

    Thanks for that last bit Hugo, didn’t know it and it is an interesting thought.While I’ve not felt tempted to play with pokemon it was due to lack of interest rather than stupid excuses/paranoia.pplr

  23. 23
    Fraser

    Uh, the nerds are still playing Dungeons and Dragons — so you'd better watch out for, um, nerd on nerd killing and stuff. If you don't fear Satan, I highly recommend the Penny Arcade/Wil Wheaton podcasts.

  24. 24
    Fraser

    Uh, the nerds are still playing Dungeons and Dragons — so you’d better watch out for, um, nerd on nerd killing and stuff. If you don’t fear Satan, I highly recommend the Penny Arcade/Wil Wheaton podcasts.

  25. 25
    Anonymous

    You know.. I used to know kids who plaied pokemon , I say used to, because they all died horrible deaths at the hands of their lord and master's minions! I know, I know.. you dont believe me… BUT IT'S TRUE … POKEMON KILL … maybe it's time for legislation… maybe we should think about the children for once!!

  26. 26
    Anonymous

    You know.. I used to know kids who plaied pokemon , I say used to, because they all died horrible deaths at the hands of their lord and master’s minions! I know, I know.. you dont believe me… BUT IT’S TRUE … POKEMON KILL … maybe it’s time for legislation… maybe we should think about the children for once!!

  27. 27
    Joshua

    I object to the preachers comparison between Pokemon and D&D! Dungeons and Dragons is clearly far more evil. We even get our very own pointy d4s which can be used to nefarious effects when spilled on the ground.

  28. 28
    Joshua

    I object to the preachers comparison between Pokemon and D&D! Dungeons and Dragons is clearly far more evil. We even get our very own pointy d4s which can be used to nefarious effects when spilled on the ground.

  29. 29
    hellkat9940

    With the DnD 3.5 Druid and the proper prestige class I can play DnD as a Pokemon Master! Mwahahahahaha! So evil!

  30. 30
    hellkat9940

    With the DnD 3.5 Druid and the proper prestige class I can play DnD as a Pokemon Master! Mwahahahahaha! So evil!

  31. 31
    Mike Brownstein

    I think he thinks Pokemon is like being dragged away to a backroom at a casino

  32. 32
    Mike Brownstein

    I think he thinks Pokemon is like being dragged away to a backroom at a casino

  33. 33
    Anonymous

    I find it funny how the video is 3:33 mins long.. 666/2 anyone?

  34. 34
    Anonymous

    I find it funny how the video is 3:33 mins long.. 666/2 anyone?

  35. 35
    Introbulus

    I like how this pastor clearly has no idea how Pokemon works. Channeling their powers through their minds? Noooo…I think he’s confusing Anime with Sorcery. And “Oh no! Pokemon teaches children how to summon demons, defeat their enemies, and FANTASY ROLE PLAY! Not Role-playing! The world is doomed!” ;p

  36. 36
    Jessica Sideways

    One episode I loved was one of the banned ones where James was dressed up in a bikini and was able to (re)inflate his breasts. ^_^

Leave a Reply